Chapter 31 Eve
EVE
Ihead to the barn an hour before sunset, an overnight bag packed as if I can’t just run home at any moment if I need something. I curled my hair and threw on a nice dress, and I conveniently forgot to put on any underwear solely because it seemed like Ryder thoroughly enjoyed that.
And when I get there, I can smell dinner from the stairs leading up to the loft. I push the door open, music flowing from the barn’s Bluetooth speaker.
And there’s Ryder, in jeans and a T-shirt with a dish rag thrown over his shoulder. He grins when he sees me, abandoning the wooden spoon he’s using to stir the sauce and coming to greet me with a kiss on the cheek.
“Well god, Evie, you didn’t need to show me up like that,” he says, taking my bag out of my hand and pushing me into a spin that causes my dress to flare out around me. And wow, the breeze is a little nicer than I thought it would be.
“I wanted to look nice for our date,” I say.
“You always look nice,” he says, winding one arm behind my back to pull me in tight against him.
He kisses me deeply, his tongue winding into my mouth and his fingers scrunching into the fabric of my dress.
I taste tomato sauce and a hint of whiskey, and I’m disappointed when he pulls away from me to drop my bag by the bed and return to the stove.
He stirs the sauce, then pokes at the meatballs. “Looks like we’re just about done,” he says, grabbing a bottle of my favorite wine from the fridge and pouring me a glass. “Sit, sit,” he says, motioning to the already set table in the middle of the room.
When I do, the whole thing becomes a little surreal. I’ve never experienced the barn as a guest before, but sitting at a freshly made table with the smells of dinner all around me, I feel like I’m in a totally different place.
And when Ryder plops dinner down in front of me and joins me at the table, the feeling multiplies. I’m on a barn date with some dude I pushed into a stream a couple months ago who, for some reason, took a liking to me.
Who’s a really wonderful guy, now that I’ve gotten to know him.
“Eat, Evie. Before it gets cold,” he says, taking a sip of his whiskey before he dives into his own food.
As we eat, I’m struck by how easy this is.
Having him here feels natural. The scent of his toothpaste after he brushes his teeth and the way he snores softly in my ear in the morning.
His quiet presence has quickly become the background noise of my days, and it hits my chest with a sharp pang that I’m going to miss him when he goes.
“How long do you think you’ll be in New York?” I ask, my stomach turning at the lack of a return date. I rest my utensils along the side of my plate.
“Only as long as I have to be,” he says, eyeing the food left on my plate. “You okay?”
I nod, taking a quick sip of my wine.
His plate is nearly clean when he pushes it away. “What’s wrong? Food okay?”
I nod, biting my lip because on the one hand, I know Ryder, and he’s the type of person that’ll get all mushy and flattered if I were to say that I’m going to miss him and it’s ruining my appetite.
On the other hand, I’m not the kind of girl who loses her appetite over a man leaving her for—what, a week? Two?
But it feels like we’re just hitting a groove with each other.
“I’m a little bummed, I guess, that you have to leave after this.”
“You’re bummed?” he asks, his eyebrows rising.
And there go my cheeks, heating again. “Yeah. I just kind of liked having some company here during the off season.”
He grins. “I won’t be gone long. A week, tops.”
“Yeah?”
He nods. “And don’t worry, I’ll blow up your phone every spare second I get. I’ll tell you what I’m eating for every meal and I’ll send you pictures of the socks I choose each morning. I’ll give you a full video tour of my apartment and I’ll even share my work calendar with you.”
“Okay, okay. I don’t need all that.”
He shrugs. “Maybe I want to give it.” He reaches across the table, taking my hand with his. “I don’t really want to leave, but I’m not ready to abandon my company—”
“I would never ask you to,” I interrupt.
He rolls his eyes. “I know you wouldn’t.
But Sana’s been working her ass off to make up for my absence, and I need to make sure she has everything she needs to continue on without me.
” He sighs, then shoots me a shit-eating grin.
“And then I’ll be back here, ready to be the sunflower girl’s boy toy for however long she wants to use my body. ”
I snort. “For how long though? I mean, you said the other night that this feels like home here and I just—it sounds like you’re kind of in limbo, you know?”
He eyes me, his expression serious. “What do you want, Evie?”
The question puts all sorts of spotlights on me. Because although I didn’t really have an endgame in mind with this conversation, I’m suddenly realizing that my anxiety had an endgame of its own.
I want him here. For good.
I shake my head. “Never mind. I think I’m just thrown by the end of the season. It always jars me, going from doing so much outside to focusing on, like, the teas or the seeds or whatever, and the fact that it all happened earlier than it usually does probably doesn’t help.”
He raises an eyebrow, cocking his head to the side. “Answer the question.”
“No.”
He snorts. “Eve, what are you not saying? You’re not going to scare me off, you know.”
“I scared my mother off and I was only six.”
He rolls his eyes. “Eve, that’s stupid and you know it.”
“Prove me wrong.”
“You’re deflecting.”
“Be deflected. Please.”
He stands, rounding the table and holding his hand out to me. “Come here.”
I let him pull me to my feet and drag me to the window, where the setting sun throws bright pinks and oranges through the sky, the cabins on the hill just barely visible in the glow. He wraps his arms around me from behind, leaving a kiss on my cheek.
“What is it you’re not saying?” he asks, his voice low in my ear as his lips brush over my cheek.
“Oh, that’s cheating!” I say as a shiver runs down my spine.
He grips me tighter, laughing lightly into my neck.
“And besides, it’s way too soon for that,” I tell him.
He kisses my neck. “Who gets to say what ‘too soon’ is?”
His arms loosen around me as I twist to face him and drop to my waist as my palms rest on his chest.
“I guess we do,” I say.
His fingers run through my hair, the sunset giving his face a warm glow.
“If you really want to know, I was going to use this time in New York to start making some plans,” he says.
“I want to get Sana set up so that she can run things from Manhattan. I want to figure out what to do with my apartment when I’m not there, with an eye toward selling it in a year or so.
I wanted to start looking into setting up a satellite office closer to here. ”
I raise my eyebrows, the questions I had had in my head melting away when I see how much further he’s gotten.
“I just didn’t want to spook you by telling you all of that just yet.
None of it is set in stone and nothing changes our day-to-day right now, aside from me actually having to go to New York once in a while, which likely won’t change anytime soon.
I just want to know my options when I inevitably do end up here for good. ”
I swallow, my eyes dropping to my hands on his chest. “That’s what you think is going to happen?”
He shrugs. “If things keep going the way things are going, yeah.”
“You think this is inevitable? That… we’re inevitable?”
He grins, his hands cupping my face and pulling my gaze up to meet his again. “Does that spook you?”
I shake my head. “No. Like you said, nothing is set in stone. I don’t get spooked that easily.” I bite my lip. “I guess I just wanted confirmation that you’re planning on coming back. That tonight isn’t, like, one last romp with the farm girl before you go back to the real world.”
“I mean, that’s not a bad way to describe it. I’m just hoping I get to live out the rest of my days in my farm girl fantasy rather than having to deal with the real world.”
I roll my eyes, pushing away from him, and start the water for the bath. “Well, just so you know, I will not be going naked underneath my overalls or fucking you on a bale of hay.”
He snorts. “Does the water wheel count?”
I narrow my eyes. “That is not farm-y. It’s historical.”
“Call it what you want. It was hot.”
I turn, pulling at the top of my zipper. “Can you help?”
“I knew talk of hay bales would turn you on,” he says, brushing my hair out of the way to kiss my neck as he tugs the zipper down.
My dress falls to the ground, and the expression on his face is everything I hoped it would be.
“Well fuck, you might not go naked under your overalls, but I’d take you naked under that dress any day. Damn, Evie. I can’t believe you let me sit there eating dinner like an idiot while you had this little surprise up your sleeve.”
“It’s not like I’m wearing lingerie or something,” I say, grabbing at the hem of his shirt and pulling it up over his head.
His hands on my hips, he tugs me close. I kiss the skin of his collarbone, his chest.
“This is way better than lingerie, if I have to be honest,” he says, curling around me so he can grab my ass. He weaves a hand into my hair, holding me steady as he kisses me.
I take the opportunity to unbutton his jeans, pushing them down over his hips, and he steps easily out of them as his tongue slips into my mouth.
I rub him through his underwear and he groans, shivering into me. When I push them down to free him, he pulls away from me, kissing my cheek and gesturing toward the tub.
“Get in,” he says.
“You don’t want to…?”
He takes my hands in his. “We have all night, Evie, and believe me, after that little naked-under-the-dress thing you pulled, we will use it. But we don’t have much sunset left. So get in and enjoy it for a few minutes before I make you come all night.”