Chapter 11
I know why you ended us .
Leia’s hands shook as she replayed the message for the twentieth time on her way to the office. Part of her felt relief that Noah had finally remembered she couldn’t have children.
But elation had turned to despair very quickly.
He’d called her a faithless little liar long before she’d told him the lie in his office about not wanting to be saddled with a kid.
A brief moment after she’d uttered the words, he’d looked highly skeptical.
She wasn’t sure what had changed his mind, but it didn’t matter anyway.
Why would he want anything to do with her when she remained a broken body and soul he would tire of eventually?
Or maybe that was the problem. Maybe he just wanted a fuck toy to play with until the more serious business of becoming a father kicked in for him.
Lying in bed, pondering everything his message meant, she’d veered toward the temptation of being just that—his fuck toy for the next seven months.
A few months of Noah was better than an eternity of nothing, right ?
But could she walk away after that time?
It had nearly killed her to walk away after a few days of meeting him. Months would rip her soul to pieces.
Because being with Noah would only deepen her feelings for him. Look at what had happened in the parking lot on Sunday night. Even at his most icily domineering and condemning, he’d made her want him to the point of insanity.
She’d craved his merciless hand and his wicked tongue so badly, she would’ve given her life for a taste of his brand of pleasure. She’d goaded him into letting him leave his marks on her, marks she still treasured because she was that pathetic.
Hell, she’d briefly panicked this morning when she’d noticed the finger marks around her neck were beginning to fade.
Prolonging contact with him was asking for trouble.
He’d become so ingrained into her sexual psyche that she’d been unable to get herself off in the shower this morning.
Despite the residual pain and pleasure of a frenzied masturbation, her body had held back on her, wishing for Noah’s hand, his mouth, instead.
Dear God, she was in serious trouble?—
Her phone vibrated, making her jump.
Noah. The ringtone pierced through her consciousness and her heart stopped. He must have tracked down the session he’d done with Fused Realms because her ringtone for his number was now the five-second piece of the jam. When exactly had he tracked it down? And when had he put it in her phone?
She cursed when the phone went silent. A second later it flashed to life again.
Forcing herself to remain calm, she answered it, despite her pulse beginning to race. “You know, you can’t keep summoning me to your presence like I’m your personal lapdog. ”
“I wouldn’t have to summon you if you answered your phone like a normal person,” he said through gritted teeth.
“I was doing what normal people do at 1a.m. Sleeping.”
“And you sleep with your phone turned off?”
“When I don’t want to be disturbed, yes.”
She didn’t want to admit that she’d had her headphones on with the music turned high to drown out her thoughts. The lie she’d told Noah just to get away from him on Monday had eaten at her until she’d been a whisker away from calling him to confess why she couldn’t be with him.
Well, now he knew.
Her palms dampened at his silence. Was he going to say something, or was he going to let her twist in the wind?
“I… I was going to call you back,” she ventured.
“Yeah? When?” he demanded.
“After my meeting this morning.”
“You didn’t think what I had to say was important enough to schedule me in before your meetings?”
She bit her lip. “I’m meeting with retailers from across the country. I couldn’t afford to have you?—”
“Fuck with your head? Or fuck you sore once we’d dispensed of this bullshit?”
Her pulse skipped so hard her hands shook. “It’s not bullshit.”
“I beg to differ. You decided how I feel without waiting to hear my side of things. What’s that if not fucking bullshit?
” His voice was growing colder, a sign that he was getting angrier with her.
“I made the mistake of forgetting what you told me in Switzerland. I remember now, Leia. I know you can’t have kids.
Isn’t that what this is all about? You bowing out of this relationship because you think that affects how I feel about you? ”
“Doesn’t it?” She held her breath .
“You get your answer to that face to face. Not over the phone.”
She exhaled. “Noah…”
“Are you interested in having a conversation?”
She closed her eyes and laid her head back against the seat.
Bargaining furiously with herself that this would be the last time, that she wouldn’t let Noah sway her no matter what, she answered, “Yes.” She’d hear him out and explain to him why they were better off without each other.
And this time, when she walked away, she would stay away.
But maybe she could walk away with another reminder of how incredible Noah could make her feel?
“Good.”
Opening her eyes, she noticed her driver had pulled up in front of her office.
She had six of the major retailers from all over the country flying in for a meeting about stocking La Carezza’s latest lingerie in their stores.
She needed her head in the game, not dreaming of Noah’s belt.
Or his hand. Or his tongue. Or, please God, his cock.
“…did you hear what I said?” he growled in her ear.
“Umm… sorry, no. I spaced out for a minute,” she confessed.
“I said we’ll talk tonight,” he repeated. “My place. Come straight up when you get there. The code is 77493. Repeat it.” She recited it. “Six-thirty on the button, Leia. Don’t be late.” He hung up.
She squeezed her eyes shut again as weakness engulfed her. Whatever happened tonight, she knew she was going to fuck Noah again. For the last time, she assured herself.
But she was going to fuck him.
Hard.
“That went well, don’t you think?”
Leia gathered the papers in front of her, placed them in the crook of her arm, and glanced at Warren.
“Yes. Far better than I expected, although the rep from Saks was a little too snooty for my liking. I had to bite my tongue several times not to snap his head off when he kept asking me how old I was.”
A rare smile crossed Warren’s face as he stopped before her. Impeccably dressed as always, he adjusted his silver monogrammed cufflinks. Leia tried not to read anything into the fact that he was blocking her way to the door of the conference room.
Her meeting had gone on for an hour longer than she’d anticipated. With her schedule now crammed together tighter than she wanted, she’d be lucky to get out of the office by six to make it to Noah’s place in time.
Would her lateness mean punishment? A feverish shudder of anticipation raked through her. She tightened her grip on the folder to keep her shaking under control.
“Yes, I noticed,” Warren said. “But you held your own admirably. You sent them all away with the firm impression that your intelligence far eclipses your age when it comes to business savvy. I’m proud of you, my dear.
” He reached up and traced his hand down her cheek, another caress in a growing number that he’d been initiating for the last few days.
Although the backhanded compliment irritated her and the caress made her feel uneasy, she didn’t react to either.
But neither did she welcome it. The suspicion that Warren felt something for her beyond their former ward–guardian relationship had grown into a solid fact she couldn’t hide from.
A fact that would need addressing sooner rather than later.
Aside from the times when she couldn’t read him properly, he’d been there for her at her lowest moments and seen her through the worst time of her life.
But…
Remembering Noah’s allegations, she stared back at him, trying to see beneath the unruffled exterior Warren always presented.
But it was as if she was looking into a bottomless lake at midnight.
She turned her head from his cool fingers.
His hand dropped, but he didn’t step away from her.
Instead, he joined her as she headed for the door.
Entering the elevator, he pressed the button for the floor above, where both their offices were located. “Are you all set for Saturday?”
She frowned for a moment, and then remembered. “Yes. My gowns arrived this morning. I’m not sure I went with the right couturier though. I might have to resort to plan B.”
“I’m having a tuxedo fitting this afternoon. I can pick something up from Oscar de la Renta’s collection, if you wish?”
The thought of Warren picking out a dress for her to wear sent a heavy bolt of discomfort down her spine.
Smiling to take the sting out of her words, she replied, “No need. I have my favorite designer on speed dial. I wanted to try something different this time.” She laughed.
“Goes to show that different doesn’t always mean better. ”
He didn’t return her smile as they exited the elevator and headed down the corridor. “Not always. But a calculated leap of faith can reap rewards.”
“Isn’t that a contradiction in terms? How can a leap of faith be calc?—”
She stopped as her secretary, Celia, emerged from her office with a flustered look. “I’m sorry, Miss Michaels. I just returned from the copier room and she was here. Reception let her up without letting me know… ”
About to ask her what she was talking about, Leia looked past Celia and froze.
Ashley was poised in the doorway to Leia’s office.
Her choice of ensemble today was just as impeccable as every single time Leia had seen her.
Despite the Miami heat, she managed to look cool and composed, with a Hermès scarf around her neck and her straight black hair tied in a chic bun at her nape.
For a hysterical second, Leia thought how perfect Ashley and Warren were for each other.
“It’s okay, Celia. I’ll deal with this.”