Chapter 12 #2
Then Niall comes in and Gideon’s smile fades and I sigh silently. I look up as Niall sits next to me. “Everything okay?” I ask.
He groans. “Well, I’m reasonably sure that she’s not going to murder me at the moment, so we can rest easy for a bit.”
“Probably eat some more porridge quickly though. And then maybe pack a getaway bag,” I advise.
He laughs. “We’ll run away together. It’ll be like Bonnie and Clyde.”
“I really don’t think a speech impediment is what you need when you’re holding up a bank. They’d drift off before they even realised they had to get the money out,” I say sagely. “Plus, my hair is really too wild for a beret.”
He laughs and ruffles my hair affectionately, and I watch my brother’s expression tighten as his eyes follow Niall’s hands. Then he heaves a heavy sigh. “Fuck, I’m bored. Let’s go away.”
“What?” Niall jerks out. “ Now ?”
“No, next year. Of course now,” my brother says somewhat petulantly. “I’ll go mad if I have to stay here.”
“May I point out that you’re the one who chose to come here and no one has handcuffed you to the table yet,” Niall says patiently.
My brother winks. “Well, not yet. Do you remember Geneva?”
Niall swallows with a click and looks at me uneasily. “Let’s not go over old history,” he says quickly. He looks at Gideon. “If you want to go away, why not take Jacinta?”
“I don’t want Jacinta. I want you.”
My head shoots up and I watch as he and Niall exchange a whole conversation with their eyes. I feel shut out and isolated, but then Niall’s hand comes down on my thigh holding tight and I remind myself that he wants me here. I’m not an interloper. My brother is.
My brother changes tack with that dazzling ability to switch emotions he uses so well on the stage. “Let’s go to the chalet.”
“What chalet?” I ask before I can stop myself.
“Niall’s chalet in Verbier.”
I blink. “I didn’t know you had a chalet,” I say slowly. How can I not know this? We’ve seen each other every day for years, not to mention been sleeping together lately. My brother looks almost jubilant at my lack of knowledge but Niall just shrugs.
“I thought you knew. But now I think about it, it was way before you came here. Silas sold me the chalet when he inherited the estate. He couldn’t afford to keep it anymore with the things that needed doing here.”
“That must have cost a lot.”
“I bought it with my inheritance from my grandfather and asked my brother to pay me out of my share of Dad’s estate.” He shrugs as if that means nothing.
“I bet you paid top whack though,” I say cautiously.
He grins, looking almost embarrassed. “Of course. Silas needed the money.”
“And did you even want a chalet?”
He shrugs, looking bashful. “Honestly, it had never occurred to me, but if Silas ever mentions it to you, make sure that you say how I’ve always wanted one desperately.
” I laugh and look at him affectionately only to find him staring at me, seemingly transfixed.
My brother clears his throat and Niall jerks.
“Anyway, I do love skiing and the place is gorgeous. It’s really homely and comfortable. ”
“I’m surprised you’ve never been there,” my brother says smugly, pushing his bowl away and sitting back in his chair. “Niall goes all the time.”
“Not all the time,” Niall says quickly, obviously hearing the note of challenge that was directed at me in that statement. “I haven’t been in ages.”
“Well, we should go as soon as possible,” my brother says smoothly. “Come on, Niall. We can go and ski all day. You need a holiday.”
Niall looks at me. “Funnily enough, Silas has just given me a week off.” My brother whoops and I feel my stomach tumble to the floor.
I swallow hard and gather my dignity. “Well, there you are. That’s all sorted. I’m sure you’ll have a wonderful time.”
“What do you mean that I’ll have a wonderful time?” Niall asks, his hand tightening on my leg to stop me getting up. “You’ll be there too.”
My ‘what’ is drowned out by my Gideon’s ‘ really ’ but Niall grins happily.
“It’s perfect. Silas said he’d given you the time off too.
I was going to suggest going away together, and this is even better.
” He grins at me, looking flushed and happy.
“I can’t wait to show you the place. You’ll love it, and you’re a good skier from what I can remember. ”
“I’m not sure that’s a good idea,” I start to say and hesitate when I see the joy drain from his face.
“Oh please, Milo. It’ll be brilliant. Please.”
I waver, looking for some reason at Gideon who is gazing at me steadily, a hint of a challenge there.
In all my years as his brother, I’ve never challenged him.
I always accepted what he said and did as he told me because he knew more than me and was more forceful.
I’ve never questioned his authority until now.
Now, when he’s coveting someone I’m coming to care for.
My thoughts veer away from that thought at light speed, but something makes me straighten my spine and smile at Niall. “That sounds good. Let’s do it.”
“Really?” he asks joyously. He hugs me and I close my eyes for a second, lost in the heat and scent of him. “It’ll be amazing, Milo.”
“I hope so,” I whisper.
Verbier is pretty in the twilight. I peer out of the windows of the minivan at the village square where shop fronts glow gold and strings of fairy lights shine, their dancing colours bright against the whiteness of the snow.
People are everywhere on the main street, walking along in their colourful skiing gear.
Someone opens the door of a bar and I can hear the distant sound of oompah music across the chatter of the pedestrians.
And above it all are the dark mountains that loom over the tiny village like hovering parents at a children’s party.
A warm hand comes down over my knee and I turn to see Niall smiling at me. “Okay?” he asks.
I grin at the look of suppressed excitement on his face. “It’s so pretty.”
“Have you ever been here before?’
I shake my head. “No. We went skiing in Austria when we were kids.”
“How are you at skiing?”
I consider. “I’m pretty good, but I’m better at snowboarding.” I nudge him, thinking of the fact that he was practically skiing before he could walk. “Don’t worry, you won’t have to babysit me. I know you and Gideon are good, but I’ll keep up.”
He frowns and shoots a look at my brother who is sitting on his other side, his face blank as he stares out at the village. Niall turns back to me. “I don’t want you to have to keep up,” he whispers. “I’m here with you.”
I look involuntarily at the other people in the minivan – my brother, Jacinta, her friend Sam who’s a fellow model, Jacinta’s sister Daisy and Daisy’s husband, Adam. Niall shrugs and leans in and I shudder at the feel of his breath on my ear. “If it was up to me it would be just the two of us.”
I want to say that it was up to him because it’s his house for fuck’s sake, and he must read that on my face the way he does so much because he shrugs awkwardly.
“I couldn’t,” he whispers. “I just couldn’t, not after what I told him earlier about no more between me and him.
And then Jacinta was sitting there so I had to ask her. Everything just snowballed.”
I look into his blue eyes shining palely in the dim light and warmth fills me along with understanding.
Of course he couldn’t leave anyone out. He cares for my brother, and I wouldn’t have wanted that last conversation between them to be the end of their friendship.
I squeeze his hand in silent comradeship and inhale as he lifts my hand and drops an absentminded kiss on my fingers.
I go back to staring out of the window, his hand a warm weight on my leg.
In the glass, I can see a reflection of my brother and I frown.
I love him dearly and would do anything for him.
Apart from share Niall. I grimace and watch it ruffle my forehead in the glass.
I shouldn’t be so territorial over what was supposed to be a hook-up.
Niall was never going to be mine, so why does it feel like he was meant to be?
Why is it so painful to imagine us parting and him moving on?
I try to remind myself that he’s not what I’m looking for, and I endeavour to bring up my image of the perfect man.
However, I can’t see him properly anymore because Niall blots him out like he’s standing in front of a quiet, peaceful man and replacing him with all that he is.
Sardonic and funny, quick-minded and kind.
Forceful and confident, I remind myself for the billionth time, but it doesn’t seem to have the same impact anymore and I sigh.
The car slowing pulls me out of my thoughts and I look out, eager to see the chalet which Niall said was called The Little House.
The car pulls up the hill and onto the drive in front of a beautiful chalet, making me smile because that name was a misnomer.
It’s big and three storied but almost higgledy-piggledy looking, as if there have been many additions made to it as the time has passed.
Constructed of local stone and wood, it looks incredibly welcoming with lights blazing in every window and spilling their warm light onto the drive.
The others exclaim and get out, chattering madly, and I climb out at a slower pace, stretching and looking around.
The air is crisp and so cold it seems to sear my throat.
I shiver and drag my coat around me. Niall comes up next to me and slings his arm around my shoulder, and I lean gratefully into his side so I can feel the furnace-level heat of his body.
“What’s the forecast for snow?” I ask. “Is it going to be good for skiing?”
He looks around, raising his face to the breeze and breathing in. “There’s snow in those clouds and on the wind,” he says decisively. “A lot of snow.”