Mine

5. Pepper

FIVE

PEPPER

I’d lost it. Truly, I’d lost it. What was I doing?

I’d been unable to keep from going to him. After his set ended, I blinked and was waiting in the hall. Then torturing myself over standing there like some idiot.

But I remembered his voice.

The stranger that brazenly called me a good girl in broad fucking daylight. The words had awakened something in me.

I slowed as we approached my building. I wasn’t sure exactly what I was doing yet.

Salt seemed to pick up on that as I stopped in front of the doors, turning to face him. He loomed in front of me, his guitar case in one hand, his other tucked in his leather jacket. Dark eyes, dark hair, a face that belonged to a god, not a mortal man. Especially not a man who wanted me.

“What do you want?” he asked gently.

“I don’t know,” I said. “I don’t know. I’ve never done anything like this. I’ve never?—”

“Gone home with someone?”

“You’re too young,” I snapped, my thoughts racing.

I was panicking. I was going back and forth between logic and the desire that had overcome me. Maybe Jeff saying I wasn’t fun anymore was going to my head. Maybe I just needed to do something for myself.

I should send him home. That was the answer. Drive him away and forget about tonight. “You’re way too young for me. How old did you say you were?”

A smirk tugged at his lips. He cocked his head. “Twenty-five.”

God, this was crazy. What had gotten into me? I couldn’t remember the last time I’d been with someone new in the bedroom. Years . I didn’t just go home with strangers, especially a stranger who was over a decade younger than me and a potential client for Rosethorn.

“Your brain has barely finished growing. What on earth could you possibly know about?—”

Salt pinned me against the wall, his knee spreading my thighs. My eyes widened, my body responding to him in a way that had my thoughts short-circuiting. Every complaint vanished as my gaze locked with his, the lust burning hot in his eyes.

He leaned in, lips almost touching mine. “Aren’t you tired?” he whispered. “Tired of fighting? You know you want me. Why are you fighting what you want? You’re a CEO, a woman who gets everything she wants all the time without so much as a blink. Are you worried about what people might think—someone who looks like you, walking home with someone who looks like me? Is it the tattoos, Pepper? The clothes I wear?”

My chest rose and fell with uneven breaths, my eyes never leaving his. Darkness emanated from him in waves, but it was the kind of darkness I wanted to get lost in. The kind of darkness that held the same wonder of lying in a field and staring up at a starry sky. Like a pot of ink, waiting to be spun into words.

It was the kind of darkness I couldn’t turn away from, because I had that darkness, too.

A depravity that yearned for something more.

Jeff had smothered it when we were married. It was wrong to be wanted like that, wasn’t it? All the years spent being raised in a small town by religious zealots told me it was wrong.

But every part of me screamed for more. Begged for it. Whatever this was, it made me act foolishly.

But really, was it wrong to be wanted?

To want to be wanted?

“This is wrong,” I murmured.

A slight smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. “I don’t think it’s wrong at all.”

His presence leached my ability to turn away. I wanted him. His age didn’t matter. The fact that he could be a part of my business one day didn’t matter, even though it was breaking the rules.

I didn’t date our artists.

And he would be ours.

He would be mine. After hearing his music tonight, I knew Tommy was right. He’d struck gold. He’d found someone who made the kind of music that led me to run away from the life my mother so eagerly wanted for me.

Salt had the voice of the devil.

And I really wanted to be a good little sinner.

For years, I’d been perfect. I had a reputation for being smart, steady, and calculated. I always made good choices. It was ingrained into me from the start.

But I wasn’t happy. That was what I’d come to terms with earlier this week. Jeff leaving me had only ripped the first bandaid off, and there were plenty more to go.

I was tired of being perfect.

I wanted to be ruined. There were so many things I’d missed out on sexually, I was certain of it. Maybe Salt could show me things I hadn’t experienced. I wanted to find out, even though it was a bad idea.

The temptation was too great.

But, I still tried to put up a fight. “You’re potentially signing with my label. You’re nothing like me.”

“I don’t want you to sign me,” he bit back. “You didn’t like my music?—”

“That’s not true,” I gasped. It wasn’t true at all. His music had made me lose my fucking mind. “Your music was good, Salt. I’m not just saying that. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have told Tommy to set a meeting with you next week.”

He shook his head at me. “No. You didn’t get it.”

My temper reared its ugly head and I grabbed his jaw, noting the way his nostrils flared at my sudden touch. “You’re a goddamn incubus,” I growled. “Your music made me want to come in front of god and everyone. It made me want to lose everything. It was dangerous .”

He braced his forearm above me against the wall, his very presence swallowing me whole. “You wouldn’t survive my appetite.”

I glowered. “Why wouldn’t I? I’m older than you. More experienced, right?”

His laugh was brutal and abrupt. “Do you know what an incubus feeds off of?”

My breath caught.

“Say it,” he whispered. “Say the word. It must feel so dirty on those perfect lips.”

“Sex,” I snapped. “ Sex isn’t a dirty word. I’m not a prude.”

Another teasing smile pricked like a thorn. “Then why did every muscle in your body tense? Sex . Is that what you want, Pepper? Do you want sex? Do you want to be fucked? Does your pussy crave a cock that’ll make her weep?”

I stared at him. I was lost. I was so lost in him. Who was this stranger? This singer? This demon ?

“Answer me.”

What am I doing? “My…” I trailed off, swallowing down the burn in my throat. “My ex-husband never enjoyed sex with me. I thought there was something wrong with me. I just want to know if there’s something wrong with me? Maybe I’m bad at this?—”

His eyes immediately softened. Fuck, I hated that look. Everyone always looked at me like that when they found out Jeff left me, or in this case, that our long marriage wasn’t satisfying in the way it should have been. I shook my head, shoving him away hard enough that he took a step back.

“Don’t pity me. Don’t look at me like that. This was stupid, this was?—”

“Pepper. Stop .”

Another command. One that made me freeze in place, unable to look at him. The doors to my building were only a few feet away. I could go in, go upstairs, and never see him again.

I could end this before it even started.

“Look at me.”

I didn’t want to. I didn’t want to be seen. If he looked at me right now, I’d shatter. I’d break. And I couldn’t break. I wasn’t breakable, I wasn’t?—

“Look at me, Pepper. Right now.”

I shivered, then finally looked at him. He stood so close again, his entire presence sucking me in.

“I haven’t wanted to fuck someone this badly in my entire life,” he whispered. “So you’re not doing anything wrong. I want you. I want your submission.”

I frowned. “I’m not?—”

“I mean in the bedroom,” he corrected. “Outside the bedroom, I doubt anyone could truly tell you what to do. But behind closed doors, in my arms, vulnerable. Needy .”

My knees felt like jelly. He was speaking the desires I’d locked away long ago, dragging them out into the open—and it was both jarring and freeing.

“Do you crave giving in?”

All I could do was nod. “All the time.”

“Then give in to me for tonight. You don’t owe me anything else. Nothing to do with your company or my music. I don’t care if you want a meeting this week or not. I think I let that go when I realized who I dry humped in the hall at Beaumont’s. What I do care about tonight is you. I haven’t been able to get you off my mind since I saw you in the coffee shop.”

“Do you normally hit on strangers?” I asked.

“Yes,” he said earnestly. “All the time. But I don’t ask to go home with them. In fact, I don’t do shit like this at all. I also don’t cage women against walls in clubs or call them a good girl without their consent.”

“But you did with me.”

“I did,” he whispered.

I pressed my lips together, looking around us. It was the middle of the night and I couldn’t remember the last time I’d been out this late.

His body language softened and he offered me a more genuine smile. One with dimples. I couldn’t help but stare before my gaze followed the trail of tattoos that licked up his neck the way I wanted to.

My resistance crumbled. “Only tonight,” I said.

He nodded. “If that’s all you want.”

It had to be. “I should make you sign a NDA.”

“I will, if you want me to.”

My muscles stiffened. Was that silly?

“You have trust issues,” he said.

“I have to have trust issues,” I snapped. I reached into my purse, pulling out my keys. “You can’t tell anyone about this, Salt. No one. Not a single fucking soul, or I’ll make sure your career never happens.”

The smile disappeared and he cocked his head thoughtfully. “Is this your attempt to put me in my place?”

“Fuck off,” I hissed. “Fuck. Why am I doing this?”

His hand darted out, circling my wrist with an ease that made my thighs squeeze tighter. Inked fingers plucked the keys from my hand, and then he was guiding me to the doors.

“I won’t tell anyone,” he said. “I’ll sign an NDA if it makes you feel better. I have no interest in what you can do to me or my career, Pepper. I just want to know what this is.”

I wasn’t sure I should believe him. This was stupid, careless, reckless.

Heat tugged at my core as he held me close, possessive. Lust boiled in my blood as we crossed the empty lobby to the elevator, not a soul in sight but us. The silver doors slid open and we stepped inside. Salt set his guitar case down as I pressed the button quickly.

Then I found myself against the wall again.

I arched against him this time. I was going to give in. The resistance was unraveling, slipping further and further out of reach.

He gripped my hair and pulled my head back, swiping his tongue along my neck. His lips hovered over my pulse, teeth grazing my skin. “Do you know what a safe word is?”

My head spun. “Yes. I’ve read a lot about it. But, I’ve never done anything… kinky.”

“I see. Your safe word is red. Promise me that if you ever need things to slow down, you’ll tell me. That you’ll speak up for yourself.”

I scoffed. “I speak up for myself.”

“Can you, when it has nothing to do with work?”

My cheeks burned. It was a little too on the nose. “I don’t like you.”

The elevator slowed, the doors opening for us. Once again, he was controlling me. Like a puppet with a master they’d willingly handed their strings to.

“Is there anything you know you like?” he asked as we made it to my door. “Spanking? Sensations? Is there anything that might actually cause you harm or you know you don’t want? Or do you just want sex?”

“I don’t know.” I unlocked my door and we went in. I kicked off my heels and sighed, wrinkling my nose as I thought about it. Salt glanced around, a hum leaving him as he took in my penthouse.

“Do you live alone?” he asked.

“Yes,” I said.

“Good. No one will hear you scream, then.”

I raised a brow, and despite everything, the moment we looked at each other, we laughed.

“Sorry,” he chuckled. “That sounded creepy. I didn’t mean it that way.”

“I know,” I said, locking the front door. “Besides, my best friend has my phone location turned on. So if you do anything, you’ll get caught. And Tommy knows you walked me home.”

“I won’t do anything you don’t consent to,” he said.

He was still standing there, looming and out of place in my home. I craned my neck to look up at him.

Desire was like a drug. It hit my system with the same urgency, the same potency. My resistance crumbled and everything shifted. The tension in the air, the stiffness of my muscles. I relaxed, the knots in my shoulders easing ever so slightly.

Behind closed doors, I didn’t have to be Pepper anymore. I didn’t have to be the CEO. I didn’t have to be the one who had all the answers.

No one could see us.

No one could see me but him.

Salt stepped closer to me. “Do you want to know what I want?”

“Yes,” I decided.

“I want you to kneel down on the floor and unlace my boots.”

My breath hitched. I looked down at his black boots and the midnight blue laces that crossed each other until they knotted at the top.

He was patient. He didn’t say anything else, waiting for me to make the choice.

Was I going to get on my knees for him?

Was I going to submit to him?

Yes.

It was awkward, but I slowly lowered my knees to the hardwoods, kneeling before him. God, what if my knees cracked? My hands trembled as I reached out, tugging on the knot on his left boot.

His palm settled on top of my head, gently petting me. Stroking me. I closed my eyes for a moment, basking in his touch before hurrying to unlace both boots.

Once I finished, I helped pull them off and set them next to my heels. Even seeing them side by side felt absurd. Louboutin red-soled pumps next to his beat up Dr. Martens with tattered blue laces, dirt streaking the sides.

I looked up at him. Rough calluses cradled my chin.

“Good girl,” he whispered. “What’s your safe word?”

“Red,” I answered.

“Good.”

His praise washed over me, awakening something deep and feral in my bones.

“What do you want me to do to you?”

“Anything,” I rasped.

He shook his head. “No. Not anything. Tell me what you like. What do you want to try?”

Anything? Everything? It’d been a long time since I’d been in a situation where I didn’t know exactly what to do. “I can’t think straight. I’ve never done this before. I’ve never…”

“Okay. We’ll test the waters. Close your eyes.”

I closed them. All of the other sensations around me intensified. The scent of his cologne, the way he held my chin, the pounding in my chest.

A reckless heart with a taste for destruction. I was finally indulging a part of me I had always ignored.

I was pretty sure Salt looked exactly like the kind of man my mother imagined would cast a spell on me and whisk me off to hell.

“Take a deep breath,” he instructed.

I did as he asked. I filled my lungs, holding my breath for a few moments before exhaling slowly. My nerves relaxed.

“What do you imagine me doing to you?”

My throat constricted. I imagined him forcing me to take his cock. I couldn’t say that aloud though, could I? That would be zero to sixty, and I wasn’t sure?—

“Pepper,” he whispered. I heard him lean over, his hand sliding to my throat.

My pussy responded, weeping for him. Desperate for him. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d felt this kind of want. It wasn’t something Jeff had ever sparked.

Salt didn’t squeeze my neck, instead just letting his grip rest there, a necklace of comfort.

“Answer me, baby girl.”

Tears prickled. “I want you to force me to take you. I want to fight you. I want you to make me. I want to scream no over and over while every other part of me screams yes . There’s something wrong with me. I don’t know why I’m like this. You probably think I’m terrible.”

“There’s nothing wrong with you,” he said gently. “That’s called CNC. Consensual-non-consent. Have you heard of it?”

I shook my head, my cheeks flaming. For as long as I could remember, I’d had fantasies like that. And for the first time, I’d spoken them aloud, and instead of being shamed the way I expected, I was embraced.

His thumb brushed back and forth along my neck. “Open your eyes.”

I did, but everything was blurry for a moment. I blinked tears away, seeing him.

Only Salt.

“Keep telling me,” he urged.

“I imagine being tied up,” I said. “I imagine being blindfolded. Spanked. Bruised. It’s all I think about when I touch myself.”

“How often do you touch yourself?”

“Every night. Every morning. Too much, probably. It was a problem when I was married.”

He nodded, understanding shining in his face. “When you were married, did you ever tell him these things?”

“I tried.”

Jeff had every right not to do something that made him uncomfortable, but the way he’d shut any sort of sexual exploration down with me still stung. That was part of why him cheating shocked the hell out of me. I thought he just didn’t enjoy sex.

But really, he just didn’t enjoy it with me.

“He said it was weird. That I needed god, but I don’t believe in god. I stopped a long time ago. It was always a problem in our relationship.”

“He didn’t deserve you.”

“Yeah.” My voice was small. “Well, he never made me come, anyway. He’d fuck me and finish and then I’d go touch myself in the shower after and think about…”

“Being fucked the way you want.”

I nodded slowly. “I want to hurt. But I want to feel good.”

“I can give you both.”

His promise made my heart skip a beat.

“I want it,” I whispered. “I want it so badly. I want you. I want whatever you want to do to me. I know my safe word. I know you’ll stop if I need you to.”

“We’ll try to go slow tonight. You’ll need aftercare.”

“I’ll be fine.”

“No,” he said. “It’s non-negotiable, Pepper. If you don’t want aftercare, then we don’t play. I know this is all new to you, but I’ve engaged in kinks like this for years. It’s not something to be flippant about. I was mentored by someone who would literally disown me if I didn’t do this the right way. After we finish, you’ll need something. If you don’t know what it is yet, that’s fine, we’ll figure it out. But I can’t leave you right afterwards, unless you plan to call someone else.”

He was serious about it. I mulled over his words, and then agreed. “Then stay the night. I couldn’t tell you what kind of aftercare I might need. I don’t even really get why it’s needed.”

“When you do things like this, you can have an endorphin drop,” he said. “It can be really intense emotionally. It can bring up a lot.”

“I’ll be fine,” I snorted. “But okay. So long as you leave before the sun rises.”

“Okay.” His nostrils flared and he released my throat, pulling me back to my feet. Before I could protest, he lifted me with an ease that made me yelp, my body now draped over his broad shoulder.

“Where’s your bedroom in this money maze?”

“Down the hall on the right.”

This was crazy. That’s all I could think as he carried me through my apartment, humming as he looked at the walls full of framed records.

He slapped my ass, drawing out a sharp gasp. “I’m no mind reader, but I can feel how fucking tense you get when you’re spiraling.”

“I’m just losing my mind.”

Salt stepped into my bedroom and took me to my bed, tossing me down on the center of the mattress. “You and me both.”