Chapter 45
Chapter Forty-Five
Kendall
When I glanced across the café, my gaze collided with Jude’s. It was all I could do not to run over to him. I was torn between whether to make my presence obvious or not. Blake went and made it obvious to the whole damn place, lifting his hand in the air and waving. “Jude! Asher! Lincoln!”
“Oh, my God, Blake!” I whisper-shouted.
“What? You know you want to see him. I’m just giving you an assist.”
All three of them came walking over. Jude’s gaze met mine, and his smile was warm, but I could see the hesitance in his eyes.
“Hey,” I said, my belly fluttering and nerves jangling inside.
“Hey, Kendall,” Lincoln said.
“Hi there.” I smiled.
Asher grinned. “Hey, hey.”
“So you’re back,” Blake said to Lincoln.
“I am back. Back to stay this time.”
Blake tipped his head to the side. Even though Lincoln had never become an alcoholic like my brother, he and my brother had partied together for a stretch. “Good to see you, man. For what it’s worth, I’m sober.”
Lincoln’s brows hitched up, and he dipped his head. “Good on you. I’m glad to hear that.”
Asher and Lincoln chatted with Blake about this and that, while I finally caught Jude’s gaze again. “How was the trip?”
“It was good and cold. Blake still staying with you?”
Blake heard that and glanced over. “Hell, no. I was just saying to Kendall, I think my timing was bad that night. It’s on me.
No more me crashing in her one-room apartment.
Not cool. My ex needed a place to crash, so I let her stay at my place, but she was lying about being sober.
I had to get the fuck out of there. Staying at my parents’ was a little too close for comfort.
Totally my bad. Working on my boundaries and shit.
” He stood from the table, gesturing to the chair. “Have a seat, man.”
With Lincoln and Asher still hovering, we now had an audience of three staring at us. Jude hesitated before Lincoln all but shoved him into the chair. “We’ll get your coffee.”
Jude sat down. Now, someone else was nervous across from me. This was a different nervous than my brother had been.
My nerves were a tangle, my stomach clenched, and my heart ached. “So, uh, that’s what happened. I’m sorry. My brother’s not the only one who needs to work on boundaries. I do too,” I said softly.
“It’s okay. I was hurt because I missed you that night.” Jude took a quick breath. “How’s Blake?”
I was afraid I might cry with so much emotion compressed inside. “He’s doing well. He got a new job.”
“Nice.” Jude nodded.
I couldn’t hold back the urge to touch him. I reached across the table, curling my hands around his. Relief slipped through me when he didn’t pull away. “I missed you, and I’m sorry.”
He shook his head. “You don’t need to apologize. I get it. It’s one of the things I love about you.”
“What do you mean?”
“You’re always there for your family. I understand that, because it’s something I try to do for mine.” He squeezed my hands.
I took a shaky breath. “Are we okay?”
He nodded, although it still felt like there was maybe not a wall, but something between us.
“Can I see you tonight?” I hated the hesitation in my voice.
“Of course. I’ll come over to the rescue program this evening to pick you up.”
“Sure,” I said, my voice squeaking just as Asher arrived with Jude’s coffee.
Asher set the coffee cup by Jude’s elbow. “We’ll wait outside.” At that, he departed.
“Are you sure about tonight?” I didn’t know why, but I felt this hesitance and uncertainty emanating from Jude.
“I am.” His eyes met mine.
“I love you, Jude.”
His gaze softened. “You know I love you, Kendall.”
I breathed through the anxiety tightening in my chest and nodded.
“I gotta go. I’ll text you what time, okay?”
“Okay.”
With another squeeze of my hands, he leaned across the table to give me a kiss, quick and fierce enough to send sparks blasting through me like a log tossed into a bonfire already blazing.