Prologue
Though the rest of the ride was quiet, there was a certain tension in the air, like they both fully understood that their time slowly dwindled down to the point of saying their goodbyes.
It was a terrible feeling and something both of them had been putting off since Moolah’s uncle announced that they were moving to Montana.
Iskyiah hated that this was even happening. She loved Uncle Marlon, but she couldn’t stand him at the moment. Uncle Marlon had bought a farm out in Montana, of all places, and forced Moolah to drop everything he knew to go there and help him get it started.
Iskyiah knew Marlon hoped that working on the farm would steer Moolah away from the streets, but they both knew better.
She was pretty sure Uncle Marlon did too.
Still, Marlon was willing to do whatever it took to make sure Moolah was good.
Though Iskyiah was pissed at Moolah’s uncle, there was nothing but love between them, and she knew Moolah felt the same way.
Uncle Marlon sacrificed a lot to raise Moolah, and she thanked him in her prayers every night because Moolah was the best person she knew outside of her grandmother.
Iskyiah knew as soon as Moolah turned eighteen and graduated from his new school, he would be on the first flight back to Desmore Bay.
That was the plan, and she knew when he was determined, Moolah would always stick to the plan.
As soon as he made the right onto the secret path they’d been on countless times, Iskyiah grinned.
She always trusted Moolah, even though she questioned him a lot.
Seeing that he brought her to their spot made butterflies take flight in her stomach.
He slowed the car down to a creep and then parked at the perfect spot before he undid his seat belt and reached for her.
Once hers was off, he murmured, “Come here.”
Her brows pulled in. “Come where, exactly?” She looked at the limited space in confusion.
Moolah kissed his teeth and tugged her over the center console.
She should have been surprised, but she wasn’t.
Moolah tended to cross the line like that with her often, but she didn’t mind.
He was her best friend. She loved him with everything in her, and he could get away with murder, and she wouldn’t look at him differently.
When she rested on his lap with her head on his shoulder, he said, “Let that be the last time you don’t come when I say come.”
She squirmed at his tone. When his voice dropped a few years back, she found it insanely cute. She would never admit that, though. Moolah held her close as they looked through the front windshield.
“There goes one,” she whispered.
They watched as a plane whizzed by them before it skyrocketed into the air. Iskyiah giggled in awe, and Moolah grinned. Neither of them had ever been on a plane before. That would change for Moolah tomorrow. She wished she could go with him.
“I’ma miss this,” Moolah muttered.
She turned her head slightly so she could look at him. “If you and Tey would have stopped huggin’ the block, you could have stayed.”
Disappointment riddled her tone. She knew Moolah felt bad already, and she didn’t want to make him feel worse, but her emotions surrounding his move were big. It was hard to contain them.
“I know, but I ain’t gonna apologize.”
She scoffed. “Wouldn’t expect you to.”
Now, her tone held attitude. She wasn’t even sure why. She didn’t want an apology anyway. She just wanted him to stay, but she didn’t understand how his itchy palm worked. He tried explaining it to her so many times, but because she was such a good girl, her brain couldn’t compute.
His mama had to be a fortune teller because according to Moolah, since he was little, money made his world go around. Moolah didn’t only hug the block. He had a job washing cars, and he worked at NellanNem’s on Sundays doing inventory. He stayed busy, and his pockets stayed laced.
“If I ain’t hug the block, I wouldn’t have been able to buy you this.” He fingered the necklace that rested on her collarbone. It was the one piece of jewelry that she never took off. It was a simple silver chain with a sapphire butterfly, which was Iskyiah’s birthstone.
She sighed in frustration. They both knew what he said was true. His legitimate jobs never could have afforded the necklace.
“Moolah . . .” she murmured. Defeat laced her tone now, and her shoulders slumped.
“Iskyiah,” he mocked, and she smiled weakly. She knew he was trying to lighten the mood.
“Seriously. I’m going to miss you. What am I supposed to do without my best friend?
” It was a legitimate question. Outside of Moolah, Iskyiah was a complete loner.
She was quiet and didn’t really fit in with any crowd.
She was a gem of her own, and Moolah seemed to be the only one to really notice her.
“You still got Tey,” he pointed out.
“I love Tey, but you know we only ever hang out when you’re there too. Plus, she’ll graduate at the end of this year, and I’ll be all alone.”
“What about Hassan?”
Iskyiah snorted. Hassan was five years younger than her but swore he was older. He tried treating her like he was her damn daddy instead of her annoying little brother.
“What about him?”
Moolah chuckled but didn’t respond to that. They both knew nothing he said at this point would change Iskyiah’s mind or feelings.
They sat in each other’s embrace for a few more minutes and watched another plane take off before Moolah spoke.
“You know I love you, right?”
Iskyiah’s body seemed to lose all its tension when he said that. “I know, Lah.”
He grinned. She was the only person who could get away with calling him that. Everyone else had to call him Moolah or Mo.
He kissed her head. “Nah. I don’t think you understand. I love you, Sky. I really love you.”
Iskyiah looked up at him. Her heart suddenly did a funny little dance in her chest as she gazed at his handsome face.
His toffee skin was a beautiful contrast to the black scruffy beard that had just started sprouting on his face.
His coal-colored eyes pierced into her, and his pink lips looked kissable—not for the first time.
Over the past few years, her body reacted differently to Moolah when she saw him. She always shook it off out of respect for Charles, but at this moment, sitting on his lap and feeling him so close, it felt impossible.
“What are you saying?” she asked in a shaky tone.
Instead of responding to her, Moolah gripped her chin and kissed her. The kiss was simple and sweet, but it felt like fireworks shot off around her body.
“Moolah, . . . we shouldn’t. I’m with—”
Moolah gripped her chin tighter, forcing her gaze to focus on him. His intensity brought tears to her eyes as she listened to what he said.
“Fuck that nigga, Sky. He don’t love you. Do you hear me? You’re young as fuck and have ya whole life ahead of you. Don’t let that nigga fuck ya shit up, you hear me? You need to get away from him and learn what real love is.”
“What you know about real love?” She wasn’t sure why she landed on that to say.
She knew she should have defended Charles and her relationship, but then she remembered that Charles had failed to show up for her that night.
It wasn’t the first time he let her down, but was Moolah right?
Should it be her last? She thought she was in love with Charles, but a part of her understood that the love she had for Charles was limited.
The love she had for Moolah wasn’t. That was a fact.
Instead of responding to her, he asked, “You know I ain’t ever lost my virginity?”
This caused Iskyiah to pull away, but not too far because Moolah wouldn’t allow her.
“Huh?” His words weren’t computing. She assumed he’d lost his virginity long ago. There was no way she lost hers before him.
He chuckled. “You heard me. I always had one girl in mind for my first time.”
The way he looked at her made chills cover her flesh. Nervously, she asked, “Who?”
“We both know the answer to that.” He leaned in and kissed her again, and it was the first time she felt like Moolah was unsure. Although she knew she shouldn’t, she leaned into the kiss and took control, silently coaching Moolah through the kiss.
When they pulled away again, Moolah’s gaze almost knocked all the air out of her lungs. Pure love exuded from him. In her young fifteen years, she never felt anything so powerful.
“Lah . . .” She wanted to tell him they couldn’t do this, but the words got stuck in her throat.
“Be my first, Sky. Before I leave here, be my first. Give me somethin’ to come back to.”
A tear slipped out of her eye as she thought about waking up tomorrow without Moolah there with her.
She felt calm as she gazed at him. For a while, she knew Moolah had feelings for her.
For a while, she knew she had feelings for Moolah.
But she got so good at ignoring them. Tonight, it all seemed to come to a head, and nothing else seemed to matter.
With a slight nod, she let go of everything else, even if it was just for a second.
She knew that what happened in that car that night would be a secret that was safe between them until they day they died.
She knew what happened in that car that night would be sacred.
She knew what happened in that car that night would stay with her forever.