Chapter 5 #2
Then, after his brother’s accident, Simon had pursued his obligations with the knowledge that if he were to be the baron, he would be the best baron he could be.
He had spent his time learning and improving the holdings of the Blackwood title, despite his interests lying in a different direction, where artistry and business blended together into a stone empire.
Now … now he had no notion of who he was and what he was to do with himself. A man unmoored. The one thing he knew was that he was a man of honor who must hold on to his integrity despite the fearsome storms of life.
He tried to calculate some way out of the muddle, but—
A light knock sounded on the study door, which was shut after John had left and Simon had shooed the rest of the family out. Simon gnashed his teeth in aggravation before tempering his impatience to call out.
“Come in.”
The door swung open, and Molly popped her head around. “Oh, good. You are here.”
She disappeared again, leaving the door wide open to bedevil Simon. He jumped to his feet to cross the room when an unexpected figure appeared in her place. Simon stopped in bewilderment.
“Why are you here?” he cried.
“Because you need me,” Madeline replied in a pragmatic tone.
She swung the door closed and approached him where he had halted in the middle of the room, stopping to peer up at him with concern. “Molly said you were in need of a friend, so she helped me sneak in through the garden to see you.”
Simon stared down at the face of feminine perfection and thought about how he would have been free to court her if he had not signed that poxed contract two weeks earlier. Instead, he would have to settle for … friendship.
“I am …” He shook his head, grinding to a stop as words failed him.
“You are free to follow your own path. It will take a minute to work out what that is, but you are a resourceful man who will work out a new plan.”
“Unfortunately, that future will include—” He could not bring himself to complete the sentence.
“Your future will include Miss Boyle.”
Simon bobbed his head, relieved she understood without an explanation. Molly had been right. He needed to speak with someone who understood him. Someone he should have never deserted, who cared for his happiness, and from whom he should have sought advice this past decade.
“It will.”
Madeline reached out, her gloved hand hovering before it brushed his sleeve. A fleeting, instinctive gesture of comfort. She withdrew it at once, folding her fingers together. “You will make it work.”
She spoke with such quiet assurance despite his abandonment of her a decade earlier. Through all those years, she had never faltered in kindness, though she might have disagreed with his decisions. Madeline was what family ought to be, though they would never reach that destination together.
“I do not deserve you … um … your help.” Simon caught himself. He was betrothed, so he could not reveal his desire to return to their previous understanding without being an utter cad to Olivia.
“We are friends, are we not? We might remain apart, but I am here when you need me.” It was so sweet. Madeline had always been constant, one of the traits he admired about her, but the truth was …
I do not wish to be friends.
Which was why he must stay away from her. He was not the kind of gentleman who could have a wife while pursuing another woman. As it was, he was afraid that he would not be able to prevent himself from yearning for his Psyche in their garden of peace and moonlight.
But he intended to find a way to remain faithful to his marriage irrespective of his feelings, which meant he should listen to her advice while he had the opportunity to do so. Future interactions must be avoided, so this was his chance to hear her thoughts.
“What do I do?”
Madeline’s lips curled into a smile. “If there is one thing I am confident of, it is that you will find a new path. You are resourceful, Simon Scott. This is a temporary setback.”
Simon drew in a deep breath, and with it came some sense of peace in the midst of his mental tempest. “I shall contrive a new role for myself. One of my own choosing.”
Her amber eyes glowed in approval. “You shall.”
“What of Miss Boyle?”
Madeline’s smile faltered for a fraction of a second until she recovered.
“You will find a way to make it work because that is the kind of man you are. A true gentleman through and through. She … You …. The two of you will discover what you have in common and grow closer over time. Perhaps one day”—she swallowed as if the sentiment caused her composure to sway—“fall in love.”
Simon stared down into her beautiful face, tempted to lean down and brush his lips over her soft mouth, but he willed himself to hold on to his integrity.
Despite the swimming confusion in his mind, Madeline’s contribution was calming the despairing beast within, and he could almost imagine that he would be happy in his new life with Olivia Boyle at his side if he stayed true to his honor.
“You are a good friend, Madeline Bigsby.”
“Will you be all right?”
He nodded. “I will find a way.”