Chapter Fifteen - William
William found Claire alone in the parlor that evening. She grandly ignored him, studying the book in her lap.
He frowned at her. "Claire, a word, if you please."
"What is it, William? I'm busy." She waited, looking up at him. He felt the full measure of her disapproval in that gaze, as if she were yelling at him in her mind.
"You seem angry with me."
She shrugged. At least she wasn't going to deny it then.
"I can't help but wonder why. Have I done something?"
She huffed a laugh, as if the entire question was hilarious and the answer self-explanatory.
"Tell me, Claire.”
"I don't know what you're talking about."
He sighed. "At least have the decency not to lie. We both know you're angry at me. But only I don't understand the why of it."
"Very well." She snapped her book shut. "If you must know, I am angry with you."
He barely held himself from rolling his eyes. "Would you care to explain?"
"I was there that night, William." She leaned forward, her eyes flashing. "At the Whittakers’ ball. I saw you and Dahlia together."
"You did?" He blinked. "Wait—why were you out in the gardens?"
"I was looking for you, of course. I had seen you from across the ballroom. Richard wouldn't let me get close enough to speak with you, so I snuck out. I would have found you earlier, only…"
"Only what?" His eyes narrowed.
Had something happened? Had someone hurt his sister while he was distracted?
"Nothing," she said. "It doesn't matter."
"It matters very much if someone took liberties with you."
"No one took liberties with me," she nearly hissed.
He found he believed her, though his forehead furrowed in confusion. "Then why are you so angry?"
"Because I came to tell you what our brother was doing. There were problems, even then. Instead, I found you in an embrace with Dahlia Warrington." She spit the words as if they were particularly foul to the taste.
"Why do you dislike her so?"
"Forgive me for not lining up like one of her many suitors to tell her how wonderful she is."
She sounded particularly irritated about the suitors.
William wondered whether Dahlia and Claire had ever been rivals for the same man's attention.
He found the thought filled his mind with a sinking sort of disgust. He didn't know which idea he hated more: a man courting his sister or a man courting Dahlia Warrington.
He shoved the inconvenient emotions aside and focused.
Claire leaned forward and nearly bared her teeth.
"I came to speak with my brother. To ask him for his help.
To tell him what was happening at home. And instead, I found him in an embrace with one of the Warringtons.
I never thought you were the type to have your head turned, William, but apparently all men are susceptible to such errors in judgment. "
"I don't understand. You're angry because I kissed Dahlia?"
"I'm angry because you weren't there when we needed you. If you hadn't been so… occupied in that garden, I might have told you the truth of all that was transpiring. You might have been able to stop it."
William was shaking his head before she'd even finished. Somehow, in his conversation with Dahlia that morning, he’d begun to forgive himself in a way he'd never thought possible.
He said gently, "I don't know if that's true, Claire. Even if you had told me, what would I have done? Richard was the eldest brother. There was no possible way for me to wrench the estate from his grasp. Legally and practically, it was impossible for me to change anything that happened. If I had stayed behind in London, Richard wouldn’t have allowed us to see each other. He very well may have tried to ruin my reputation out of spite. Many doors of business would have been closed to me if he’d done that. If I hadn’t returned to India when I did, I might have been able to help sooner after he passed, but certainly not on this scale.
" He held his hand out to encompass the riches in the room.
Claire shook her head. He was shocked to see tears gathering in her eyes.
"I am sorry," he said again, more gently.
"I am sorry for all that you and our sisters endured.
I am sorry that our brother was a feckless reprobate who gambled away the title's fortune.
But I cannot change what happened in the past. All I can do is make sure that it never happens again moving forward.
I want to have a relationship with you, Claire.
Are you going to be able to forgive me?"
She pressed her lips together until they blanched. She looked out over the room. They sat together in silence, the ticking of the clock the only sound to break the tense silence.
Finally, she nodded. "Very well. I can accept that your presence probably wouldn't have changed anything, anyway."
He frowned. "That hardly sounds like forgiveness, Claire."
She shook her head again. "I know it's not rational. I'll try to forgive you. That's all I can promise. But you must understand that I spent the last four years hating you for not being here to change things. I don't know if I'll be able to stop now."
He nodded slowly at the truth of her statement. "As long as you promise to try to forgive me, I promise to try to make up for those hard years. I want to make your life better. I want to make you happy."
"It's quite all right, brother." She stood and patted his hand. "I’ve decided never to put my happiness in a gentleman's hands again."