Chapter 11 #2
I nonchalantly polished off my overpriced champagne and set the glass down. “Oh really? And why is that?”
“Well, for one, I’d be too embarrassed to show my face after being let go like that. I heard a rumor you’re making the move to that hovel of a town permanent,” Jim said smugly.
Publishing in New York shared a striking number of similarities to the gossip tree in Story Lake. “I’ve heard a few interesting rumors myself recently. How’s that new author you screwed and screwed over?” I asked.
He scowled at me and opened his mouth to deliver what was sure to be a smug insult, but Colin interrupted. “I hear you’ve been reaching out to my client.”
So Wiggens had received at least some of my communications. And he’d thought enough of them to tell his agent. Good. I pasted on a professional smile. “My noncompete is over. If you’re doing your job well, I’m sure you have nothing to be concerned about.”
Jim snorted into what I could only assume was a fifty-dollar glass of mediocre scotch. “Like anyone with half a brain would choose you over Beau Monde.”
“Your ex-wife did,” I said pointedly.
“Hazel was let go the same way you were. We don’t waste our time on subpar hacks. It’s a shame really. If she had just taken my advice, she could have been a respectable author.”
I was looking for a conveniently placed catering tray when we were interrupted by yet another new arrival.
“There you are, Zoey,” Navya, the woman of the hour, said as she extended her hands to me.
We’d met a few times before, but I was struck as always by her elegance.
She was gorgeous and glittering in a black cocktail dress.
Her dark hair was threaded with silver and swept back in a sophisticated twist. She had the posture of a ballerina and the quiet confidence of a queen.
Every time I was in the room with her, I found myself standing taller.
I took her offered hands. “Navya, congratulations. It’s so nice to see this award go to someone who truly deserves it.”
Colin cleared his throat. Jim didn’t bother hiding his sneer.
“You know Hazel’s ex-husband, don’t you? The one who tried to take her books in the divorce?” I said, introducing her to Jim.
I knew from the surprised wing of Navya’s eyebrows and the deadly glare Jim sent my way that I’d gone just a smidge too far. Damn it. It was one thing to spar in private, but to air dirty personal laundry publicly was an amateur move. Why couldn’t I keep my inside thoughts to myself?
“I’m surprised you took a chance on the ‘dream team,’ Navya,” Jim said, snidely hooking his thumb in my direction.
“It’s only a matter of time before Hazel breaks down again or Zoey here drops the ball and ruins a launch.
If you’re ever interested in publishing a few legitimate authors with professionals backing them, I’m more than happy to take you to lunch. ”
My blood was boiling, and my mouth was open, which I knew from experience was not a good combination.
Fortunately, Navya responded first. “What an interesting pitch,” she said archly.
Unfortunately for us all, my mouth was still open, and it intended to do its job. “Yes, Jim. So interesting that you’ve changed your tune. What did you call Navya’s publishing house at their first launch party? Oh, right! A tabloid of trash that wouldn’t last a calendar year.”
Colin looked as if the olive from his martini had gone down the wrong pipe.
“Such imagination. I can assure you, Navya, I would never disparage you or your company like that,” Jim said, lying through his weaselly teeth.
I snorted.
He turned on me. “Even if Hazel’s next foray into maudlin bodice rippers is a commercial success—which it won’t be—eventually she’s going to realize what everyone already knows.
You are a talentless child with the attention span of a flea, and she could get much further with a real professional behind her. Not someone just playing dress-up.”
I didn’t think. There was no premeditation when I snagged the vodka and soda out of the hands of the woman walking past and tossed it in Jim’s face. Instant satisfaction. However, I hadn’t accounted for the splatter, which not only soaked me but also Navya’s gorgeous dress.
A gasp went up from the nearby bystanders.
“Women. They’re so damn emotional,” Wiggens complained, blowing a nauseating smoke cloud toward the ceiling.
“Oh, shut the hell up, you ancient primate,” I said to him.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
I backed away from the horrified faces and bumped into a cocktail table behind me, knocking over a few more drinks. Whispering apologies, I made a hasty exit.
“Stupid,” I murmured to my reflection in the gilt-framed restroom mirror.
Shame was a ball of fire in my stomach.
Why couldn’t I have just kept my mouth shut?
Why couldn’t I settle for just imagining I was throwing a cocktail in Jim’s smug face?
Once again, my impulses had led me astray.
He’d known exactly what buttons to push to activate my deepest, darkest fears.
And I’d reacted like a child mid–temper tantrum.
Only this time, I’d done it in front of the one person who’d believed in Hazel enough to give her a shot to prove herself…and a roomful of people who had already written us both off.
“I’m such an idiot,” I whispered morosely as I dabbed at the vodka-scented wet spots on the bodice of my dress.
I was going to grovel to Navya, and I would have to apologize to Jim and make it seem like I meant it.
And I wasn’t that good an actress. No, thanks to my impulsiveness, the entire publishing industry knew that I was an unstable mess.
“Are you all right?”
I spun around, horrified to see Navya in the doorway.
“I am so sorry. Unbelievably sorry. I ruined your beautiful dress on your big night. You must think I’m horrible,” I babbled. Why couldn’t I just be like everyone else? Why couldn’t I just think mean thoughts instead of acting on them?
I handed her a huge wad of paper towels, a pathetic apology gift.
She accepted them and put them down on the counter. “Zoey, as satisfying as it was to see vodka and soda dripping from that idiot’s nose, you can’t let people like that get to you. Especially not in a professional setting.”
I winced. “I know. I know. I just…couldn’t help myself. Please. Whatever you do, don’t let this affect Hazel. She’s amazing. She wrote an amazing book, and she deserves all the good that’s coming her way.”
Navya chuckled. “I’m in this business for two reasons.
Because I love books and I love making money.
Hazel wrote a brilliant story that’s going to connect with readers around the world and make us a lot of money.
And you, my dear, were smart enough, brave enough, and passionate enough to be her champion when no one else was.
I believe in you just as much as I believe in her. ”
To my ultimate embarrassment, my eyes filled with hot tears. “Really?” I whispered.
“Really. There are enough toadstools like Jim Whitehead gatekeeping wonderful books from the world. You have a drive and a loyalty that reminds me of me when I was your age. But you have got to learn to take that pause between stimulus and response. It does you no favors to let imbeciles like that know they’ve gotten under your skin.
It’s much more satisfying to make them think they mean nothing to you at all. ”
I closed my eyes. “I know you’re right. He’s going to tell everyone how ‘unstable’ and ‘emotional’ I am. I basically just handed him the perfect weapon to use against me.”
“Learn from your mistakes. Find a way to control your impulses. If you can channel that passion in less self-defeating ways, you’ll be unstoppable.”
I wanted to believe her. I wanted to believe that it was possible to finally uncover an untapped well of self-control. But I was starting to worry that my parents were right. That I was a lost cause.
“Now I suggest you get back to what’s most important. Getting Hazel ready for the launch that will change both your lives.”
I nodded. “Thank you. And again, I’m so sorry, Navya.”
“Don’t apologize. And don’t slink out of here with your tail between your legs. I expect to see you in the audience, head held high.”
“I can do that.” At least I’d give it my best shot.