Chapter 2 #2
Elizabeth opened her eyes and repressed a sigh of irritation.
Long shadows danced upon the wall before her, ethereal and elegant; ghostly images that resembled figures swaying in scandalous proximity—hands, arms, bodies entwined, perhaps in the act of a waltz.
Though she had yet to see the fashionable dance performed, Elizabeth knew something of what it entailed and had often wondered what it would feel like to have a gentleman’s hand—his hand—placed firmly upon her waist, holding her so closely and in so familiar and intimate a fashion for the duration of an entire dance.
Jane shifted her weight upon the bed and Elizabeth quickly recalled herself. “Speak of what?” she asked, her voice subdued, though her complexion was heightened.
“Whatever it is that is making you so unhappy. You cannot deny that you are otherwise, for I see it in you.”
“There is nothing the matter with me. I am perfectly well. My spirits may be somewhat out of sorts lately, but it is nothing worth distressing yourself over. I will soon be myself again and all will be as it was.”
Jane’s fingers stroked Elizabeth’s hair.
“I am afraid nothing will ever be as it was. Our lives are ever changing, and there has been a great deal of alteration of late. Lydia is a married woman living with Mr Wickham in Newcastle, and I will soon be making my home at Netherfield, wed to my Mr Bingley.”
The reality of her beloved Jane living so far from her as three miles made tears prick the corners of Elizabeth’s eyes and a lump form in her throat.
“I know,” she whispered, “and while I cannot rejoice in the situation Lydia has brought upon herself, I am glad for you, Jane. You deserve to be happy. You have suffered much in the past year.”
“As have you,” Jane replied. “Oh, Lizzy, I know not all of what he has written to you, or what has come to pass between you—nor do I wish to force your confidence—but I beg of you not to read Mr Darcy’s letter anymore.
It does you no good that I can see. In fact, your spirits are always much worse afterwards. It pains me.”
Elizabeth closed her eyes as a few tears spilled down her cheeks and onto her pillow.
She wiped them away with the back of her hand and took an unsteady breath, then turned her face towards her sister, whose pale eyes reflected only concern and love in the dim interior of their room.
“Very well, then. If it is truly what you wish, I will refrain from looking upon it, if for no reason other than to ease your mind.”
Jane’s eyes glistened as she reached for Elizabeth’s hand. “Tell me,” she enquired in earnest, “what might I do to ease your mind?”
A pang of sadness swelled within her as she caressed the beautiful sapphire ring upon the third finger of her sister’s left hand wistfully, a gift from Bingley.
“There is nothing you can do. I must conquer this on my own. I ask only that you continue to have patience with me, for I dread losing you as well. Though Netherfield is but three miles, it will seem like fifty without you here to comfort me as you have all these years. Oh, Jane, how much I shall miss you!”
“And I you! You must promise me you will come often to Netherfield, even if it is only to hide yourself away in the library and immerse yourself in a book. Though the current offerings are somewhat meagre, Charles has told me he plans on adding to it soon with the intention of pleasing you, my dearest sister. You will always be welcome in our home, whenever and for however long you wish to remain with us.”
Elizabeth laughed then and smiled with real pleasure. “Then I am afraid your excellent Mr Bingley will grow quite tired of me, for there is nowhere else I would rather be than with my dearest sister.”
“Come, Lizzy. Nowhere?”
“Well, perhaps there may be a few places I would like to see someday, but I would never wish to be far from you.”
“We are to go to London after we are married, and it would give me great pleasure if you were to come as well.”
Elizabeth shook her head. “I could not intrude so upon your time with your new husband. Surely, Mr Bingley will want you to himself and I will only be in his way.”
“Nonsense. Having you with me will bring me comfort. I confess I am not looking forward to attending dinners and meeting new acquaintances who will no doubt be eager to dissect every aspect of my person, my manners, and my dress. I would feel much easier with you by my side. You shall give me strength.”
“Jane,” Elizabeth began, but Jane would hear none of her protests.
“Charles and I have already discussed the matter at length, and it is quite settled between us. He would like for you to come as much as I. There is nothing to be done for it except for you to agree, for I refuse to go without you.”
Elizabeth laughed. “Very well. I know better than to argue with you once you have made up your mind. And as I have no wish to be the means of disappointing your husband should his bride absolutely refuse to accompany him during his honeymoon, I accept. But only on the condition that you will see to your own pleasure first and leave me to find my own amusement. Poor Mr Bingley will go distracted having to share you so recently after finally earning the privilege of being alone with you.”
Jane agreed, and the matter was soon settled between them. Elizabeth would accompany her sister and new brother to London on the day following their wedding, and there she would remain until shortly after Christmas, when the Gardiners were expected to travel to Longbourn for the New Year.