CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER FIVE
‘Sorry. What are you talking about?’
‘I spoke to Isabella yesterday and, to cut a long story short, the wedding is off. That’s why I wanted you here, Caitlin. I didn’t think it was a conversation we could skim over in a phone call.’
‘How could the wedding be off , Javier? We were only planning things out up to a few days ago! I know Isabella has been a little indifferent about proceedings, and I can understand why now that you’ve explained the situation, but to call the whole thing off? I thought you said that it was an arrangement that suited both of you. Why would she call it off? Are you sure?’
She tried to remember the last time she and the other woman had been out doing wedding stuff. Things had been fine then, hadn’t they? As she’d told Javier, the general level of interest might have been well below average, with no noticeable excitement on show, but that was how it had been from day one! She’d become used to it. Had Javier had any kind of hand in this? Could it be anything to do with the heart-to-heart they had had the evening before?
Caitlin looked at him from under her lashes. She could recall every word he’d said to her in the restaurant, every confidence shared. Had that sharing of thoughts and feelings roused something in him? Had it broken through the hard granite behind which he kept his emotions and freed him to want more than just a business arrangement with a woman with whom he wasn’t in love?
‘I’m very sure,’ Javier said gently. ‘It’s hard to make a mistake when someone tells you that they no longer want to get married to you.’
‘I’m so sorry, Javier. I know that it wasn’t a traditional sort of situation…’
‘That’s a very diplomatic way of putting it.’
‘But you must still be disappointed.’
* * *
Javier said nothing. He’d known that things weren’t proceeding smoothly for the last few days, of course. Isabella had been vague and evasive with him and, when he’d prodded her for an explanation, her eyes had skittered away and she had mumbled something and nothing about everything being fine.
However, that had been far from the truth, as he had found out the evening before when he had called her. Her partner, Maria, who had originally been sympathetic to the situation, had issued an ultimatum. Isabella had realised that to proceed with the marriage would end her relationship with Maria, so she had made her choice.
For Isabella’s and Maria’s sake, Javier was quietly pleased. The burden of carrying such a big secret would eventually have had consequences. Besides, her fears were unfounded. She might be scared of upsetting the apple cart but how would she ever know if she didn’t dive in at the deep end and find out?
Although…the decision did screw with all the plans he had in place. On an immediate level, a deal was in progress for her company that would require a conclusion and, even though he would no longer be involved in the running of her family’s business empire, it was only right that he finish what had been started. He had called Caitlin to his house urgently because that was where she would be needed. Not that she had any clue about that.
Then there was the annoying inconvenience of arrangements that had been put in place which would have to be un -put. On a much more pressing level, though, was the fact that, with Isabella’s withdrawal from the bargain they had agreed, he would now be up against it to find himself a suitable bride before the clock ran out. Isabella had been perfect. Now he was left with a problem. He intended to get those vineyards. When he thought about losing them because of a stupid inheritance clause, he felt sick and his heart tightened up. He wasn’t an emotional man, but he had memories of a time of joy and innocence, and he intended to do what it took to have that piece of the puzzle slotted into place in his life.
But he wasn’t going to be shackled to anyone who wanted to lay claim to his heart. He couldn’t envisage a future of trying not to disappoint a woman who wanted more than he could give.
How many women would fit the bill of the wife who was happy to lead a life of duty without making demands on him? How many women were there out there who weren’t romantics at heart, like his PA? How many women would be able to get on board with a marriage that would bring everything they could possibly dream of…except love?
The thought of searching for a suitable bride threatened a headache. He roused himself from his depressing train of thought and considered Caitlin’s observation that he would be disappointed.
‘Very much so,’ he said truthfully. ‘Look, Caitlin, I’m sorry if I’ve sprung this on you,’ he said a little awkwardly, ‘but as you can imagine there are a number of things in motion that will have to be sorted. Of course, Isabella offered to do that herself, but if I’m honest I think you would be more efficient when it comes to sorting that out.’
‘Yes. Of course. Er…can I ask what brought about the change of heart?’
‘You can ask, Caitlin, but that wouldn’t be a question I would be prepared to answer.’ Or qualified to divulge.
* * *
Caitlin stiffened. When she had been summoned to Javier’s house, she hadn’t known what to expect. It hadn’t crossed her mind that he might have a health issue. She’d never known him to have an hour off work in his life. So she’d immediately thought about some deal or other that was time-pressured and about to collapse. He could be a tough taskmaster when it came to work and would have thought very little of rousing her from her beauty sleep if he needed something urgently.
She’d been knocked for six when he’d told her that the marriage was off. And underneath the shock was just a little thrilling thread of hope that perhaps she’d got to him. Would it have been that impossible? He’d told her things she just knew he would never have told anyone else. She conveniently discarded all the bits of the conversation that didn’t tally with the sneaky, treacherous thought that something might have stirred inside him, something that had made him call it quits with Isabella.
That single cool answer to her question brought her right back down to planet Earth and those bits of conversation she had conveniently discarded—the bits that involved a description of the sort of woman he’d seen himself destined to marry had Isabella not been on the scene.
‘Understood. I have details of everyone involved in the preparations and all the contact details of the guests. What shall I give as a reason for the cancelled event?’
‘No need to give any reasons to anyone. It’s off and that’s the sum total of it.’
‘People will naturally be curious. What if they ask questions?’
‘People are entitled to be curious but that doesn’t mean their curiosity has to be satisfied. It’s a personal situation; maybe you could tactfully imply as such.’
‘You’re so cool and collected about this,’ Caitlin murmured and Javier relaxed enough to half-smile.
‘What’s the point getting worked up over something that can’t be changed?’
‘That’s true.’ The man she’d had dinner with the night before was very different from the guy she was talking to now and she wanted the dinner guy back. She wanted to have that low, sexy voice tell her things he’d never told anyone before. She wanted to feel special and, much as she knew it was wrong and stupid, she wanted to feed the crush that hadn’t managed to go away, however hard she’d tried to make it.
She was desperate to see behind the polite mask and the polite words. She wanted to play with fire, and that was heady, because she’d never been someone who wanted to do anything dangerous, and this urge felt dangerous.
Andy had messed her around and made her withdraw into a place of guarded caution when it came to her heart. She had trusted what she had seen and hadn’t looked deeper at all the stuff that hadn’t been visible on the surface. He’d been the safe bet who had pulled the rug from under her feet. She’d turned her attention to her boss because his absolute inaccessibility made him safe, but he was the least safe man on earth when it came to women and their hearts.
He’d said so himself. He’d been honest and straightforward about what he looked for in any woman who might end up occupying a place in his life for longer than ten minutes. Yet the desire to stick her hand out and get it close to the fire was overpowering.
‘I knew that growing up in foster care,’ she said quietly. Somehow it felt liberating to look back on the past and open up a bit with someone, which was something she’d never done. She looked down and realised that she wasn’t doing this to encourage confidences from him, to try and bring some of his walls down. She was doing this because she wanted to.
‘Caitlin…’
Caitlin fell silent. When she glanced at him, his dark eyes were urgent, but the second he met her quiet gaze he looked down. The only sign that he had heard what she had said was the tic in his jaw and a certain tension in his body language.
‘Talk to me.’ Javier’s voice was low and ragged and her breathing hitched as their eyes met.
‘I’m sorry. This isn’t about me.’
‘Isn’t it? It’s not like you’re not involved here.’
‘What I mean is…’
‘I want to hear what you have to say.’
‘I guess, when you said that you just had to live with what you couldn’t change, it took me back. It was lonely being in care. It’s not like anyone was cruel, because no one was. I suppose, looking back, they all gave the best they could, but most of them had families of their own. We were just a job, all of us.’
‘I can’t imagine what that must have been like for you.’
‘Learning to resign yourself to what fate had dealt you was key to surviving intact. I mean…’ Caitlin smiled ‘…I had my fantasy life in my head, but reality, well, that was always a very different thing.’
She looked at Javier thoughtfully. ‘So I understand why you’re dealing with this calmly. Still, I can’t say that I’ve always been so stoical when it comes to matters of the heart.’ She grinned and shot him a teasing look from under her lashes.
‘What happened?’
‘Oh, the usual: girl meets boy, girl falls for boy and thinks marriage is on the cards, girl finds out boy’s been having a bunch of affairs behind her back and only kept her around to help with his coursework. I was upset and it wasn’t as though there was anything like a ring on my finger!’
‘That’s why I find it helps to steer clear of emotional complications, as you know. So, to recap, I’ll leave you to make suitable excuses for the non-event but it’s all going to have to be done very quickly. At least there are no presents to return to anyone.’
‘I’ll make sure you approve of the wording before I send anything formal out.’
‘No need, Caitlin. You’ve been working for me long enough and dealing with enough situations out of your remit for me to trust you completely when it comes to matters like this. I’m sure whatever wording you use will be perfect.’
‘Okay, if you’re sure. On another note, there might be some trouble recovering deposits paid to various people—the venue, for instance, also flowers and the caterer.’
Telling Javier about Andy had opened the door between them even wider for her. As for him, he was still all business, wasn’t he? She almost resented the detachment of the conversation they were having, even though to have considered anything else only a few weeks ago would have been unthinkable.
‘Pay every single person involved the full amount owed to them as if the wedding had taken place, and add a ten percent bonus to what they would have received from me. They’ll have had their noses put out of joint, and it would hardly be fair for them to take the hit with such short notice. Call it a goodwill gesture from me.’
‘I’m sure they’ll appreciate that.’
‘So…moving on to something else.’
‘Yes?’ Caitlin blinked and dragged her wayward thoughts in line. ‘If it’s about work, then naturally I can come in first thing on Monday. And… I know you paid me a huge amount to finish this process and now that…’
‘Forget about the money.’ Javier waved his hand.
‘In that case, thank you, Javier. It’s been an amazing bonus and it’ll help with the deposit I’m getting together.’ She paused. ‘I’m betting that Tricia will be pleased to get back to her routine. I’ve been keeping in touch with her, making sure that all the deals on the table when I handed over have been going in the right direction. I can deal with all the stuff with the wedding first thing and be ready to start back by lunchtime.
‘Also, if I can bring Benji in, I’m happy to work as much overtime as you need me to. Angie is one of my closest friends, and we pretty much share Benji between us, which he loves, but she refuses to take any money from me for all the cover she provides and I don’t want take advantage of her. I’m actually planning to use some of the money you’ve given me to help her with some building work she needs to house dogs she wants to rescue.’
* * *
Javier saw the softening of her features when she talked about her friend and the way she automatically reached down to rub Benji’s ears.
For a few seconds, he stared in brooding silence at her far-away expression, thinking about what she could do to help her friend. She had come from a background of hardship but none of that had dented the soft generosity of her nature. She had no examples of loving parents to have provided guidance with what a successful relationship might look like, but she still believed that they existed. She’d had a learning curve with a partner who had used her, from the sounds of it, and yet she still hoped that she would still find love. She was the essence of the hopeless romantic, whatever hard edges she might have. He felt as though he was looking at someone from a different planet.
‘Very laudable.’
She burst out laughing. ‘Not really. I’ll tell her that she owes me big time.’
Their eyes tangled and she flushed and fidgeted.
‘So…is that all? I can start straight away on cancelling stuff.’
She readied herself to leave but Javier held up his hand.
‘Not quite.’
‘Okay.’
‘Isabella and I were due to go to the French Riviera after the wedding for a week…’
‘Right. Wow, that’s such a shame. I don’t remember booking the flights and hotel…’ She frowned.
‘You didn’t. I did it myself. Neither of us was entirely sure how to play that angle and, when we did agree, I handled the arrangements personally.’
‘No problem. Add it to the bundle of things to be cancelled and I’ll handle it.’
‘It’s not as simple as that.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘This was a busman’s honeymoon. We discussed what we could combine it with and chose the French Riviera because that’s where one of the hotels in her father’s chain is being finalised for planning. It was a toss-up between there and Lake Garda. I have a deal nearing completion there, so that would have worked as well.’
‘Very…er…practical.’
‘Ideally, Isabella would have been there to cast her eye over the architectural drawings—make sure she was one hundred percent satisfied with the finished product, bearing in mind she has a stake in the place—but c’est la vie . I’ve already told Jean Michel, the head guy in place, to supervise everything once work begins and that she won’t be coming along with me as anticipated, for unforeseen circumstances. Phoned him before I phoned you, as a matter of fact. Everything’s been cleared for me to sign off on the project.’
‘Okay, well, that’s a result, I guess. If you and Isabella parted company on an amicable basis…um…couldn’t she just have gone with you as planned?’
Javier thought of what Isabella was gearing herself up to do—to have the biggest conversation with her father of her life.
‘No,’ he said flatly. ‘But a sense of honour and duty means that I still have to see this deal through.’
‘That’s so wonderful of you, Javier. I know you two go back for ever, and there’s a lot of family history, but many guys would have been tempted to walk away in your situation.’
‘I’m not many guys.’ He wondered if this was her background kicking in. She dreamt her dreams but her experience with her last partner was probably where her expectations lay when it came to men: hopeful, optimistic, but realistic.
It felt good to think that she didn’t include him in that category, which was understandable, considering he was and always had been a pretty fair and generous employer. Nevertheless, he enjoyed the warm approval on her face as she smiled back at him.
‘This might have been an arrangement rather than a marriage, in the sense that you understand marriage, but I have and always have had a strong sense of duty.’
It was almost possible to forget the repercussions of the marriage being called off as he basked in her admiring smile. ‘But moving on from that…’ He reluctantly changed the subject. ‘It’s not just about the arrangements that have to be cancelled. I called you here because this situation involves you.’
‘I beg your pardon?’
‘I would have got one of the PAs at Alfonso’s head office to join us in France to handle the details of the deal.’
‘Alfonso?’
‘Isabella’s father. He has his own bank of people who could have come into play.’
‘Okay…’
‘But, with the marriage called off, that no longer seemed appropriate. Still leaves me with the small matter of having someone by my side over there to wrap up the details and format it for signing off. You know the way I work and you can come with me.’
* * *
‘Come with you?’
‘It’s the perfect solution. To be honest, it would have slowed things down having to make sure someone knew how to keep up with me. You know I can sometimes be impatient.’
Caitlin stared at him, mouth open as she digested what he had just said. She didn’t want to go on a work trip with him. She could smell the danger of that a mile off but he was looking at her with a neutral expression, fully expecting her to comply.
The fact that they had breached the boundary lines between them wouldn’t have registered with him. He might have opened up to her, but he wouldn’t be dwelling on that, tearing himself apart as he analysed what it might mean. He might have surprised himself but he would not have gone down the road of thinking that it meant anything other than a lapse in his usual rigid self-control, brought about by the suddenly unusual nature of their circumstances.
‘I don’t think I’ll be able to put things on hold without a bit more advance notice,’ she ventured and he frowned.
‘What would you have to put on hold that requires a lot of notice?’
‘I…well, Benji… I’ve barely seen him recently.’
‘I gathered from Isabella that the dog went with you nearly everywhere.’
‘Well, be that as it may…and I wouldn’t actually say everywhere …’
‘Do you have an up to date passport?’
‘Yes.’
‘And no personal obligations that can’t be dealt with while you’re away for a week?’
‘No.’ Caitlin sighed.
‘Then it’s just a matter of packing a case. No need to take care of flights and the hotel is already booked. I’ll email you the details.’
‘When?’
‘A week on Monday morning. Most of the days there will be occupied with work-related issues but you can do your own thing in your spare time.’
‘Right.’
‘And don’t look so worried. I know you’ve had a hell of a lot sprung on you over the past few weeks, and not much by way of explanation but…’ he absently scooped up Benji with one hand, tucked him against his chest and looked at her ‘…but, once this is out of the way, life will return to normal. Count on it.’
* * *
Javier broke eye contact.
Having her there for work was the best outcome but he uneasily remembered how far their working relationship had travelled in the space of just a few weeks. At the back of his mind, there was the unsettling thought that she might have read too much into the confidences he wished he hadn’t shared. There had been an intimacy in some of their exchanges; he’d seen her in a different light and had been turned on.
But she hadn’t flirted. He was used to women who flirted. If he’d caught the occasional look, well, nothing had been encouraged. In fact, he had made it clear that he was just the sort of guy a girl like her should stay far away from. And she would know that. She knew what he was like first hand from the number of women who had come and gone over time.
He wasn’t sure whether asking her on the trip had been the right thing to do but, the sooner their relationship was returned to the box from which it had been temporarily removed, the better. He’d told her that things would return to normal as soon as the deal in France was completed and he’d meant it.
* * *
Caitlin didn’t feel normal as she waited for Javier’s driver to collect her on the day of the trip—not unless ‘normal’ meant jittery, apprehensive and treacherously excited.
There had been no undercurrent of anything when Javier had explained the situation. She would be going there to work. When he’d told her that life would return to normal once that job was done, she’d got the message loud and clear: boundaries, temporarily shifted, were back in place.
She’d packed a compact case with sufficient boring clothes to last her the week. It was going to be hot. She assumed the hotel would have the usual stuff—a pool, a couple of bars, a restaurant or two, and the all-important conference room. So she’d packed one black one-piece swimsuit, a few nondescript work clothes—largely to remind herself that whatever door had been opened between her boss and her would now have to be very firmly shut—and some sundresses, because if she had any free time then she would explore as much as she could.
His car collected her promptly, driver leaping out to carry her case to it, and then holding the door open for her to find that the back seat was empty. She was told that Javier would be meeting them at the airport.
It was a beautiful day and Caitlin relaxed back against the tan leather seat and let her mind drift. She’d never, ever been spoiled by anyone. Care had been practical and regimented in her foster home. She’d always had to pull her weight, help out and then, when she was older, keep an eye out for the younger ones.
Then she’d met Andy, started dating him and had seamlessly moved back into the caring zone, doing stuff for him, and pretty soon he’d accepted that that was her role: to do stuff for him . Why should he have lifted a finger when she’d been happy to do all the lifting on his behalf?
Now, as she relaxed in the back of the car, she felt spoiled for the very first time in her life, as much as she tried to tell herself that this was a work trip and nothing more.
Was that how all those women had felt—spoiled and special? Had he made the same effort with Isabella? Or had it been more practical without any need for Javier to go overboard with the courtship?
She gazed off through the window at a cloudless summer day but, although she expected to find them heading towards the congestion of an airport, she realised after a while that they were heading away from London. By the time she’d marshalled her thoughts back to the present, the car was swinging away from the main road and following a winding route to an airfield that was busy with all manner of small planes. Under a milky blue sky, people excitedly hung out behind a sturdy wire fence that was interrupted by gates. Small planes were stationary behind the gates, waiting as one of them taxied its way out into the blue sky to replaced by another.
Javier’s private jet was waiting for her, black, sleek and streamlined, and dwarfing all the other tiny single props around it. This was beyond opulence. This was a declaration of untouchability: who owned this beast owned the world. She was aware of eyes curiously following her as she walked towards the jet.
Javier was lounging by the plane, chatting to someone she assumed was the pilot, and she paused, heart hammering, just to stare at him for a few seconds. In cream trousers, a black polo shirt and a cream linen jacket he was utter, masculine perfection. He was wearing dark sunglasses and before she could peel her eyes away he turned to look at her and then sauntered towards her.
‘You’re here.’
‘Mmm. Wow, Javier…is this yours?’
‘Everyone needs a toy.’
He grinned as she shielded her eyes from the glare and looked at him.
‘It’s a very expensive toy.’
‘I have a lot of money. Besides, it’s very convenient for getting from A to B very quickly, and it’s easy to work on board. You could almost say it pays for itself. Did you get the reports I emailed you about the hotel?’
He had spun round and stood back so that she could precede him into the jet and, on the verge of answering, Caitlin stared around her in silence. Very pale, tan armchair-style seating complemented an arrangement of smooth walnut tables that could be used for dining or working. There was a concealed bar to which Javier went, also in walnut, producing two bottles of sparkling mineral water.
‘Short flight,’ he said. ‘So no one will be serving us food, although there’s champagne if you prefer it to water…’
‘Water’s fine,’ Caitlin said hurriedly as they both went to sit, facing one another with one of the low walnut tables separating them. She launched into some spiel about the reports he had sent, on top of her game as always. Her voice was breathless and it was an effort not to just keep staring around her and soaking up the unspeakable luxury.
* * *
‘We can catch up with all this when we get to the hotel,’ Javier said as the plane began pushing back. ‘We’ll only be in the air for an hour and a half, maybe a bit more.’
Javier noted the way she clutched the arms of the chair and shot him a frozen, glassy smile. He felt a kick of satisfaction at introducing her to something that was obviously so wildly out of her comfort zone. He knew that was a purely masculine reaction, a juvenile instinct to impress, and he could almost smile at the passing weakness because it wasn’t something he had ever recognised in himself.
‘You can relax,’ he said soothingly. ‘The leather isn’t going to survive that vice-like grip for very long.’
‘I haven’t been on anything like this before,’ Caitlin confessed.
‘In which case, you should sit back and enjoy the experience.’
The roar of the engines diminished when they gained height and he could hear himself think. For a few seconds, he was immersed in the moment as he looked at her.
‘I used to dream of travelling.’ Caitlin half-smiled. ‘The furthest I got with that was travelling on a normal plane to a normal place surrounded by normal people going on a normal package holiday. You would have collapsed with shock when I went to Spain. There wasn’t a single free seat, and when the guy in front decided to recline his chair I spent the rest of the flight pinned to my headrest.’
Javier’s lips twitched and he smiled back at her, relaxing for the first time since he had spoken to Isabella.
‘Can I ask you something?’
‘Sure.’
‘How is it that there’s no eager guy in your life? Did one bad experience put you off men for good?’
* * *
Caitlin hesitated for a couple of seconds. She thought of the unattainable guy she had pinned her innocent fantasies on, the guy sitting opposite her with the curious expression, head tilted to one side, dark eyes capable of seeing too much for her liking. ‘There is an eager guy in my life. He may not make the sort of demands on me that keep me from doing this or going on holiday, but he’s really and truly my one great love.’
‘Who?’
‘Benji. He’s very, very eager. Sometimes way too eager, if I’m honest. There’s only so many times a girl wants her chap jumping up on her and getting dirty paw marks all over her trousers.’ Her heart was thudding as his eyes remained on her, lazy and amused. She felt he could see straight into her soul and pick out the thoughts she wanted to hide, thoughts about him and how he got to her.
‘Tell me where we’re heading and what’s on the agenda when we get there,’ she said abruptly as she broke eye contact and fumbled for her laptop. ‘I can start getting to grips with the details I’ll need to know before the first meeting…’
She didn’t want to look at him. She was going to have to get herself together before they landed and remind herself that, whatever confidences they’d shared, she was still his employee and he was still her boss.
Things no longer felt harmless for her and it was time she began moving on.