CHAPTER ELEVEN
CHAPTER ELEVEN
E NZO HELD ON to Charlotte until the first streaks of gold appeared on the horizon. The start of a new day. Another day that he wasn’t in Sydney.
This had turned into the most extraordinary trip. The best return to Italy he could remember, and Charlotte was the reason for that. Unfortunately, life beyond this yacht wouldn’t pause for ever. Their time away wrapped up in only each other was coming to an end.
He scooped Charlotte up as gently as he could and carried her to the master bedroom where he tucked her into the plush bedding and then stepped into the shower.
Powerful jets of water rained down on him, washing the salt and sweat off his skin. It wouldn’t be long until his crew returned, and when they did, he would have to instruct them to sail to Perlano. He had taken enough time to indulge in this maddening chemistry with Charlotte. Once he was assured all was settled with the lawyers, they would leave. He had responsibilities and a whole list of things to deal with once they were back in Australia.
He would move Charlotte to a more secure property, then get her to close all the bank accounts in various names and move the funds into ones in her own name. Changing her details at the office would be simple. It was time she stopped hiding and started living, and under Enzo’s protection she would be able to do just that. Perhaps he would move her someplace close to his own apartment. It would be a lot more convenient when they wanted to have sex.
Is that all it is?
Of course it was. It had to be. Enzo had no interest in starting another relationship. He had no interest in love. Once burned, twice shy, after all. No, there was nothing more to this thing with Charlotte than a powerful attraction and the need to protect her from men that he would love nothing more than to destroy.
Enzo shut off the water and dried himself off. Charlotte was still soundly asleep, so he went back up to the deck in time to see his crew arrive.
‘Take us to Perlano,’ he instructed.
By the time they had reached the marina, the sky was pale blue, the sun only just risen.
‘ Tesoro , it is time to go,’ he said, waking Charlotte.
She stretched, bathing him in a smile that felt like a punch. ‘Where are we going?’
‘Home.’
She frowned, sitting up. The sheet fell to her lap, and Enzo had to fight the urge to take her again.
‘Home? Home to Perlano or home to Sydney?’
‘Both. We have been away long enough.’
He didn’t miss the look of disappointment on her face, but she must have known that things would go back to normal.
‘Let me get dressed, and I’ll meet you up top.’
He waited on the side deck for her. When she emerged in a summer dress, he briefly questioned why he would want to return to Sydney at all. But this wasn’t his life. His company was.
It was time to return to reality. This time, Charlotte could assert herself in the office without trying to make her ideas seem like his own.
Looking back, he was almost disappointed in himself that he hadn’t figured things out sooner. So many things he’d dismissed, when they had been glaring clues as to who his PA really was.
‘What’s on your mind?’ Charlotte asked, when they’d disembarked and climbed into his waiting car.
‘Nothing for you to worry about, tesoro . We have a lot to do when we return.’
‘Why do I feel like you’re not just talking about work?’
Enzo glanced over at her. Once, she would have broken the connection of their gaze; now she refused to back down, willing him to tell her the truth. ‘Because we’re not. We will have to make some changes if you’re to remain safe. And you will have to do away with Celeste Park.’
She fell quiet after that, but Enzo couldn’t have her pretending to be someone else when she worked at one of the most respected financial institutions in the world.
As soon as they reached the estate, his phone chimed with an email.
‘Perfect.’
‘What is?’
‘Emilio has been informed that he has no claim.’ Enzo was happy that everything was in hand. He had accomplished exactly what he had set out to. No one would ever question what was his again. But he couldn’t shake the unease his father’s actions had inspired in him. He pushed the feeling away, not wanting to acknowledge it at all. This was still the man who had taught him everything.
He spotted Isabella entering the large entrance hall. ‘Isabella, we are leaving for Sydney.’
‘Will you not stay the night?’ It crushed Enzo to see the sadness his choice caused Isabella, a woman who had shown him nothing but love. But he couldn’t stay here.
‘Tell me, Isabella. Would you have told me that Emilio had been here if I had not returned?’ The answer was more important to him than anything in that moment.
‘No,’ she admitted.
He couldn’t trust anyone.
‘We’re leaving for Sydney. I will not be returning home.’
‘For how long?’
Enzo didn’t give her an answer. He didn’t have one. It would be impossible to stay away for ever, but he had no plans to return anytime soon.
‘Leoncino, you call this home even now. Sydney isn’t home.’
Sydney wasn’t filled with memories of lies and betrayals. Enzo turned his back on Isabella and walked away.
‘Enzo!’ Charlotte called, but he climbed the stairs, slipping from view.
‘Let him go. I wish to tell you something, piccola .’ Isabella took Charlotte’s hands in hers, a gesture that was so earnest Charlotte would have done anything she asked. ‘Be patient with him. I have seen him grow up. I have seen him before he closed his heart.’
Charlotte nodded. ‘Goodbye, Isabella.’
All the way to the airport and even after boarding, she couldn’t stop thinking about what Isabella had said.
‘...before he closed his heart.’
She sat across the table from Enzo. His eyes were firmly fixed on his laptop. Charlotte knew Italy was a moment in time. A moment she wished could have lasted for ever, a moment where she knew happiness and freedom and what it was to love someone. But now that it was over and they were heading back to Australia, she no longer knew where she stood.
A closed heart didn’t bode well for her. Yes, he was caring and protective. He had promised to protect her, but he hadn’t said a word about anything more than that. What would happen once they reached Sydney? What would happen at the office? To her career? People would question why the CEO’s PA had gone from Celeste to Charlotte. She didn’t work in a vacuum.
Protection didn’t mean love. No words of a future had been exchanged, so where did she stand? What would happen if Enzo decided he’d had enough of her? This relationship, whatever it was, was a risk, and Charlotte had lived avoiding risks.
She cursed herself for not thinking this far ahead when they were in Milan. A spell had been woven around them, but this flight was carrying them away from the magic and back to real life.
‘Enzo?’
‘Hm?’ He still didn’t take his eyes off the screen. She reached over and pushed the screen down, just as he had once done to her.
‘What’s going to happen once we’re back in Sydney?’ Her heart beat erratically as she waited for the answer.
‘I told you—’
‘I’m not talking about my protection and undoing all of my precautions. You know exactly what I mean. Do we have a future?’
Surprise flashed in his eyes, but he quickly covered it with a mask of neutrality. Whatever his answer was, Charlotte would hear it. He wanted trust, and she wanted the truth.
‘Charlotte, I don’t have it in me to love again. To trust that much.’
She was ready for his answer, but it didn’t stop the words from shattering her heart. A heart that she had foolishly given to him. A good man. But a hurt man.
He moved his laptop aside and reached over, his hand sliding over her neck, thumb caressing her cheek. She wanted so badly to lean into the feeling. She could let him kiss her, then she wouldn’t have to think at all. Passion would be the only thing coursing through her, and none of this would matter.
But that would be running. And this one time, she wanted to face her problem.
‘Would it not suffice to enjoy this chemistry we have? To enjoy the protection I offer?’
Charlotte didn’t respond. What could she say?
Think. You need time to think.
She agreed with the voice in her head, and being around Enzo was too distracting. Green eyes bored into her soul. Watching her. Waiting for a response that wouldn’t come. At least not now.
‘I’m going to rest,’ he announced, leaving her at the table, and made for the bedroom. She was sure he did it because he knew what she needed. He wouldn’t force her to do anything she didn’t want to, not even give him an answer. Except she did need one. For herself.
Would it be enough? Would it be worth it? To have run from the prospect of an unwanted, loveless marriage into a loveless relationship with only protection and sex on offer? Offered out of a duty to her, not love. Enzo wasn’t Grant. Enzo didn’t want to cage and control her. He offered her pleasure and excitement. Even now her cheek still tingled from the spark of his gentle touch. He offered her a life.
But not a life with him. His hurt was deep, his inability to trust warranted, and perhaps in his place she would not want to love again either. But what they shared in Italy had felt so much like love. Giving her the gift of travel when she had given up on it as a possibility. His anger at her treatment. The way he had pleasured her, especially that last night under the stars. Control. He had given her control.
But none of it made any difference if he didn’t believe he could love. He would never give that to her. She would never break into his heart.
Charlotte groaned and placed her head on the table in front of her. A headache was forming behind her eyes. Maybe aspirin and sleep would help clear her thoughts. She was about to reach for her bag but froze. The thought of aspirin conjured visions of Enzo handing her an antacid box, back in their hotel. The fact that he had one for her had touched her beyond measure, but that wasn’t what had a hold on her now. It was the fact that she had been so calm with him since they had gone to Ravello, had felt so safe and relaxed, the stress of her father’s constant threat so far from her mind, that she hadn’t needed them at all.
When had anyone’s affection been so healing to her?
‘I don’t have it in me to love again.’
Charlotte curled up on the seat, soft leather hugging her. Lulling her into a state of semisleep where she could escape the swirling thoughts that plagued her.
When the plane touched down, she was no closer to an answer. A car waited for them, and without thinking, she approached the front door but realised the driver had the rear door open for them both.
They were back to reality. Enzo allowed her to enter first, then slipped in after her.
‘We’re going straight to the office. Something has come up. I have to go into a meeting.’
‘Will I be taking the minutes?’
Enzo’s features had settled into the usual professional mask he wore for the world, but now they softened a touch. Charlotte noticed his hand twitch towards her, but he kept it firmly, stubbornly, on his thigh. The driver’s eyes flicked to hers in the rearview mirror. Charlotte didn’t know if she was grateful that Enzo was keeping their relationship private or if she was irritated to be shown affection in secret. Especially when she was meant to come out of hiding, stop living her life in the shadows. But she was still the PA. That’s where she would have to be.
‘No. You have other more urgent matters to address.’
There was no tesoro , no Charlotte here. Enzo wanted her to start unravelling her web of lies. She had his protection—she didn’t need to hide. But he was hiding his feelings for her. And even though she understood how having a relationship with the boss could look, she was certain the man who could provide her protection could also deal with that aftermath.
She nodded, saying nothing because there was nothing she could say. A part of her wondered if Enzo wasn’t punishing her a little for the trust she had broken with her charade.
As soon as they arrived at the office, Charlotte—tired from the long trip, heart aching from going from soaring happiness and freedom only a day before to feeling like she was standing on quicksand now—went straight to her desk and fired up her laptop. Enzo didn’t spare her a glance as he walked toward the boardroom.
She opened up a blank document, fingers poised over the keyboard, thinking. Why had she run in the first place? She didn’t want Grant. She was scared of him. She didn’t want to be controlled. She didn’t want to be a pawn. She felt betrayed that she was promised one life and was being forced into another while having to watch her sister get the life, the career she wanted.
But beneath all those valid reasons, Charlotte also wanted to choose her partner and wanted to be chosen back. She wanted to be loved. To feel loved. The closest she’d ever got was in Italy when she had foolishly fallen for Enzo knowing how closed-off he had become, knowing about Gia and Emilio.
She wanted love, and Enzo wouldn’t love her. Every day would be torment. Every day that she gave to him would be another when she might have found someone to love her back.
So Charlotte began typing. Ignoring the sting in her eyes, she didn’t stop until she was satisfied with what she had written down. Hitting Print, she raced to the larger of the printers on that floor to pick up her document before anyone else could see it, and as if the fates were watching her every move, she saw Enzo emerge from his meeting. One look from him had her heart racing. Her stomach coiling. Dampness pooling at the apex of her thighs. She wondered how she could have such a primal response to him when her heart was breaking from knowing he would never be hers.
‘Come with me,’ he said, lacing his fingers with hers and pulling her into his office, giving her flashbacks of a woman in grey admiring the view of Circular Quay. Of placing an espresso cup on the table. Of a man being difficult when he received it. They were like spectres living in the same place but in an alternate dimension.
But she was yanked from the vision when the door closed and Enzo had her pressed up against it, his lips coming to hers in an urgent, fiery kiss. She kissed him back, lips roving over his. His tongue danced with hers, unleashing sparks everywhere in her body. She wanted this. Wanted to drown in him. Wanted him to crave her in the very same way, as if he needed no nourishment in the world other than her touch. She wanted him to love her. And as much as this kiss made her feel and made her forget, it didn’t make her forget that.
So she placed her hands on his chest and, as much as it hurt to do so, pushed him away.
‘Enzo, we can’t do this.’
She watched the lust clear from his green eyes as he took in the look on her face. She wasn’t sure what he was seeing there because she could don no masks. There was no strength in her for that. Nor did she want to, because she wanted him to know that even now she would be honest with him.
‘Tell me what you are thinking.’ It was an order.
Charlotte handed him her letter and moved away, creating some space between their bodies. She watched him read it, wondering exactly what he was thinking. When he looked at her, she saw confusion on his face.
‘You’re resigning.’
‘I’m leaving, Enzo.’ The words she had hoped for so long that she wouldn’t have to say. Hope was a dangerous thing. She had stayed at De Luca and Co. hoping she could make her mark through Enzo. She loved working here, but now, in the end, she couldn’t say that it had been the people she loved or the work particularly, it had been getting to work with Enzo. He had been such a big part of her life even when they hadn’t been involved. Ideas and decisions she had made only came to life through him. She didn’t agonise over anyone else calling her Celeste; it had only bothered her on Enzo’s lips. But she couldn’t stay and hurt. Somewhere else, alone, she would give herself the possibility of forgetting him. Dulling the effect he had on her with time.
‘Why?’ He took a step towards her, and she took one back. Just like she had in the hotel in Milan when he had learned the truth and she had wanted to run. ‘Does this have something to do with your father?’
‘No.’ She shook her head, swallowing to dislodge the lump in her throat. ‘I’ve just had time to think. To realise that we can’t be together.’ She threw her hands up in the air and walked away from him, looking out at all of Sydney. Silently saying goodbye to a city she had only really got to know from afar. Where would she go from here? How much would it hurt to walk away? Right now, she was sure peeling the flesh from her bones would be less painful.
‘God! Enzo... I want you, but not a relationship at arm’s length.’
‘Charlotte...’
That one word had her scraped raw. The strain in his voice. The longing in her for a life that was different was so consuming. If she could have been born anyone else, maybe they would have had a chance. If she didn’t crave what he couldn’t give. But that wasn’t who they were, and it made no difference to wish for it now.
‘You’re not someone who will truly let anyone in. You’re not someone who will love another, and I want that, Enzo.’ A sob she had tried so hard to stifle escaped her and had him trying to close the distance, but she couldn’t let him. Accepting his comfort would only make this harder. ‘Look at what we’re doing here. Hiding in your office. This is what we will have. Kisses in secret. Touches that no one sees. Whispers that mean nothing. I don’t want a secret affair. I want affection in the open. I want to be loved in the light.’
‘Charlotte, you know I can’t love you,’ Enzo said with a calm that made her want to rage. But his eyes betrayed him. They were anything but calm.
‘I know, and I won’t ask you to. You’ve been too hurt. Your heart is scarred and beaten and bruised, and I have to accept that. I don’t want to change you when I...’
‘When you what?’
He walked towards her, but this time she didn’t retreat. She simply stared up at him unable to say the words on her lips.
When I love you.
‘When you what, Charlotte?’
‘It doesn’t matter. What matters is that I fled one life without love—I can’t trade it for another. For whatever this relationship is. It would be too hard to be around you, Enzo. I can’t .’ And that was when she lost control of the emotions she was trying so hard to keep a lid on. She wrapped her arms around herself, tears slipping down her cheeks.
Enzo could see Charlotte breaking apart in front of him.
And it made him panic.
He wanted nothing more than to pull her into his arms, to comfort and soothe her. To tell her the words she wanted to hear to make her stay. But he couldn’t do that. Not any of it. He had never lied to her, and he wasn’t about to start now. But he couldn’t let her go either. His body called to hers and hers to his in a way he had never experienced before.
Attraction. Chemistry. Whatever he had called this thing between them hadn’t been adequate. It was more than that. It was primal. It was a force of nature.
He couldn’t lose her. His body pulsed with...fear? Was he afraid of her leaving?
His breathing grew ragged as he realised that was exactly how he felt. He had feared nothing in his life, but he feared this. Everyone who had lied to him or betrayed him had been cast from his life, but Enzo didn’t want that with Charlotte.
He could not lose her.
‘You can’t leave,’ he said, his voice low, full of authority. ‘You’re mine .’ He felt the truth of it in his bones.
But it wasn’t heat or affection he saw in her fathomless eyes in response, it was pure sparkling anger.
‘I am not !’ Charlotte snapped, the strength of her tone surprising him even when he knew of the fire within her. ‘I am not a possession, Enzo. I am not my father’s to bargain with. I am not a trinket for Grant’s whims and schemes. And I am not yours. I am my own person. You don’t get to tell me that I belong to you just to make me stay. To control me.’
Control her...
That was the last thing he wanted to do. How could she get it so wrong? He wanted to hold on to her. Keep her by his side.
She was glorious in her rage, coming to stand toe-to-toe with him, but she didn’t reach out, and when he tried to, she shrugged off his touch, taking him back to a different time. A different woman.
‘I never wanted you.’
‘I deserve to be happy,’ Charlotte said, eyes shining with tears. ‘I deserve to be free.’
‘Free? What freedom will you have out there without me? Hm, Charlotte?’ Enzo challenged. Surely, she had to see the best life she would have was with him, with the protection he could provide? ‘Will you crawl back into the dark? Make yourself sick?’ He threw the slim card of antacids he had taken to keeping in his pocket in case she needed them onto his desk. ‘Live an empty life?’ The words were unkind, a wound he inflicted on them both, but they were nonetheless true. He hated the idea. He hated that she wanted to put an end to them. Hated that he would be the one left missing her when she could so easily walk away.
‘I’ve looked after myself before. I can do it again.’
‘Fine!’ he yelled, losing the tether to his self-control entirely. ‘You’re welcome to protect yourself!’ Teeth gritted, he curled his hands so tightly his arms trembled. And Charlotte? All she did was place her hand on his heart and, with a sigh, walk towards his door.
He wanted to grab hold of her wrist and yank her back into his arms, to kiss her until she saw sense, but he did none of those things because if she didn’t want to be his, she could leave.
Almost as if it happened in slow motion, he watched her open the door and walk away. She stopped only briefly at her desk just outside his door, to pick up her bag. One bag. After two years with him, working for him, all Charlotte had to show for it was the handbag that she carried anyway. Proof that he was a temporary stop. A place to hide until it no longer suited her. He’d been used. Not just him this time, but De Luca and Co. too.
And just like that, a blistering, consuming anger poured through his veins, erasing the panic, the desperation to hold on to her that he had felt just moments before. Fine. Enzo didn’t need her. She needed him. Charlotte may have squirrelled a fair chunk of money away in different accounts, but that didn’t compare to his resources. His power and influence. She would never know true safety on her own. Not from her father.
Enzo marched to the door and slammed it shut. How dare she compare him to that man? He raked his fingers through his hair roughly. He was trembling with anger and had no way to rid himself of it.
It wasn’t bad enough that she had likened him to Gordon Kim, she thought he wanted to control her, just like Grant Campbell. Knowing exactly the kind of filth Campbell was made Enzo want to break something.
It just went to show that one could never know what someone really thought, what was in their heart. Once again he had let someone into his life only for them to prove that he couldn’t trust anyone. As if he hadn’t learned the lesson enough. This time it had been his own fault. What the hell had he been thinking? Charlotte had been lying to him from the day they met. When he uncovered her deception, he should have rid himself of her right then in Milan. Not have wanted to protect her. Take care of her. Gift her the freedom she longed for.
And that thought had him replaying their time together on the yacht. In Ravello. If he’d thought he had reached the limit of his fury, he was wrong. Now he grew angry not just at Charlotte but at himself, for all that he had said to her. Had shown her.
Did she think he allowed everyone into his life the way he did her? She had been the first person he had taken to Ravello. That place was his sanctuary. The yacht was for him alone. But he had let her into these pieces of him no one knew about. Had told her about his family.
If she thought that was worth nothing, then he was better off without her.
‘A possession,’ he spat.
That showed Enzo precisely how little she thought of him.
He took a deep breath. It did nothing to calm him, but it did get him moving, walking stiffly to his chair. Every muscle in his body was bunched as he sat down, staring daggers at the door. At the empty table beyond.
She lied to me , he thought to himself. What use do I have for a PA I can’t trust?