Chapter 21
Lake
“W hat is the point of spending all this money on concealers when they don’t work?” My voice shook as I stood in front of the mirror, my hands unsteady. I had fourteen tubes, pots, and other containers of concealers strewn about on my counter.
Zach would hate the mess. He would tell me to clean it up. And then he would force me to clean it over and over again until it was exactly how he wanted.
And I would do it. Because I wanted to make him happy.
I looked at the different shades of pink, cream, and beige on my counter and gripped the edge of the marble, trying to suck in a breath.
Everything hurt. How could this have happened?
This was on me.
I wasn’t someone who got hurt like this. I was smarter than this. It was my fault, because I hadn’t seen the signs even though I worked with people who did it daily.
It was my fault that I had allowed this to happen.
I was going to fix it because it wouldn’t happen again.
I picked up the final tube of concealer in hopes that this one would work. That it would be the correct shade to cover up the bruising.
Tears bit at my eyes. My lip ached from the cut in its flesh.
I could see his hand marks on my neck. The width of his fingers with every achingly slow squeeze of his hand as he looked at me and told me I was nothing.
I could trace his thumb along my throat, his fingertip brushing my chin.
I could see the edge of the bruising already forming after such a short time on my neck, down to my shoulders. I could see where he had tried to choke me, to end me because I had said no.
My lip still had a cut that had finally stopped bleeding, and the bruise around my eye would eventually fade. The concealer did a better job of hiding that, but not as good a job as I needed it to.
I needed to hide it so the others couldn’t see. So I could fix this on my own.
I was Lake Montgomery. I had been pulled out of my own hell once before and been blessed into this family. I couldn’t shame them by telling them I had made a mistake. A mistake that would cost me everything.
I could not cry, I could not weep, I could not break. Because none of that would help. Nothing could help. But all the money spent on concealers in the world was not going to hide these bruises.
Nothing would hide these bruises.
With a cry, I shoved the concealers into the sink, the act of violence causing bile to rise in my throat. I needed to breathe, needing to do anything but stand here and feel sorry for myself.
Other people had it much worse than I did. They were living paycheck to paycheck, living out of their cars, needing help when I didn’t. I helped others.
I didn’t need help.
I pressed my hand to my side, the sharp pain making it harder to breathe.
I met my gaze in the mirror, the blue faded.
When had that happened? When had my eyes changed color?
I swallowed hard, my throat dry. It hurt to think, it hurt to breathe.
If I didn’t need help, why was I putting concealer on my neck at seven p.m.?
If no one was going to see me, why was I trying to hide it?
I stood there, my thoughts going in a chaotic swirl as I tried to remember everything that happened and what I needed to do. I needed to leave, to stay away. I needed to hide. I needed to run. I need to do anything but stand here and wonder why I didn’t have the perfect shade of pink concealer to cover up Zach’s handprints on my neck.
“I need help,” I whispered, the words broken, shattered remnants of the person I had been.
I was Lake Montgomery. A millionaire who was brilliant in tech and could form a business that helped others. Who constantly helped others.
I was not the woman in the mirror. The shadowed reflection of a wraith.
I closed my eyes, trying to find a semblance of composure. But there was nothing.
My phone was broken, my purse long gone. He had taken everything.
He had taken me.
I stumbled out of the bathroom, through my bedroom, and down the hallway. I moved past the broken lamp, the upturned chair. I kept walking over the glass shards, ignoring the searing pain in my feet. Then I opened the door and kept moving. I just kept moving.
Although Leif and Brooke would be moving soon, I knew they would be over there. Because Luke still lived there. That little boy.
I hoped it was late enough that he was sleeping because I didn’t want him to see me. I didn’t want anyone to see me.
I needed something. I just couldn’t remember what it was. My head hurt, and I felt as if I saw double every other time I blinked. Things weren’t making sense, and I had a hard time keeping my thoughts in order.
I moved across the grass achingly slow, ignoring the piercing shards of pain in my feet and down my sides.
I just needed Leif. My cousin would help.
He always helped. He wouldn’t hate me. I didn’t want him to hate me.
I moved up the porch, sucking in a breath as I tried to move one foot in front of another. I wanted to sleep. If I slept, things would be better. I would be able to breathe, and nothing would hurt anymore.
I needed my cousin. He would know what to do.
The door swung open before I could knock, and I saw the one person I didn’t want to see. I would rather see anyone other than him.
No, that was a lie. I didn’t want to see my parents, not now. They couldn’t see this.
And I couldn’t see Zach.
It became harder and harder to breathe. I knew I was hyperventilating. I had to be stronger than this.
I was stronger than this.
“Lake? What the hell, baby?” His voice was so soft. So unlike the Nick I knew. Maybe this wasn’t him? Maybe it was Zach pretending to be him. Alarm shot through me. I needed to run.
And then Nick was there, coming closer. I cringed instinctively, my body stiffening.
I saw the storm echo over his face before he cooled his features, looking as if he hadn’t wanted to break down the walls around us, to tear through anything between us.
This was Nick. My cousin’s best friend, my family’s friend.
My friend. A business partner.
My jokingly fake nemesis.
And I didn’t want him to see me like this.
“Lake. Baby. What happened?”
“Nick?” I croaked, my voice hurt. Everything hurt.
Why was he here? I thought that Leif would be here, not Nick. Nick didn’t live here. I knew that. Why was I telling myself these things that were true and yet not relevant? Why was everything taking so long to think through?
I wanted to hide. I wanted to go away. I wanted to pretend this never happened. But I had been doing that for far too long. I had nowhere else to go.
So I said the one thing I didn’t want to, but the only thing that I knew would change everything. Because this was next, if my cousin wasn’t here, then Nick would be there. Because he always was. Always .
“I need help.”
My knees gave out and Nick caught me, saying words I didn’t understand. I knew that everything would be okay because Nick was here.
Even if nothing was ever okay again.
***