Chapter Five
Bailey
Jagger opened the door to his house and stepped aside for me to go in first. It fit him well. Masculine and really nice—not junkyard chic like my furnishings in Carson City.
After I got out of the Army, I didn’t plan to stay in Carson City for more than six months, so I didn’t invest in home furnishings.
Thrift shopping was a trend after all. Everything I’d bought—a couch, a lawn chair, which was handy for sitting on the balcony, a set of TV trays, a bed, and a dresser—would all be redonated.
The only new thing was the television, and that would go with me, along with my bike, wherever I landed next.
“Nice place.” I glanced around to see a comfy-looking couch, a leather recliner, a coffee table, and a big-screen TV mounted to the wall. What I didn’t see were pictures of Jagger’s family.
There were a few novels on a short shelf under a large picture window, and there was a hallway I assumed led to bedrooms and a bathroom on the left. The kitchen was on the right with a back door leading to a small yard that faced the mountains.
“Thanks. I’m renting, but if I stay, I’d like to buy the whole thing and make it a single-family home.”
“You got a special lady who might want to live out here at the edge of the mountains?” It was gutsy to ask, but I was tired of the dance. I saw nothing that hinted he was married, but maybe he was divorced and had a new girlfriend?
Jagger’s cheeks turned beet red as he closed the door. “I haven’t had time to meet anyone important. Let me show you to your room. I have a couple of pork chops in the fridge that I planned to grill tonight. You can take a shower if you want.”
Jagger went into the kitchen and returned with a bottle of dishwashing liquid, the kind prevalent in television commercials featuring ducks covered in oil.
I chuckled. “Thanks?”
“I know it’s weird, but it’ll get the grease out. There’s also shampoo and conditioner in the shower for after you use this. It’ll dry your hair out, and your hair is…” He stopped speaking abruptly. “I’ll make a salad and start the grill when you come out. Take your time.”
He rushed away like his ass was on fire, which made me laugh. I dropped my duffel in the bedroom and grabbed my Dopp kit to take to the bathroom.
Once inside, I turned on the shower and stripped, happy to make the water hot enough to sear my skin before I lowered the temperature. I squeezed the grease-cutter soap into my palms and smoothed it onto my hair, letting it sit to dissolve the oil, vowing never to use that shit again.
Jagger Hansen was an amazing guy. I hadn’t expected him to invite me to stay in his home, but I wasn’t turning him down.
God knew he was sexy as hell. I suspected he was straight with a pretty little girlfriend out there somewhere, so I vowed not to allow my libido to lead me into trouble.
Once I had the grease paint out of my hair, I washed it with the nice shampoo and applied the conditioner while I scrubbed the rest of myself to get the paint off me.
After rinsing, I turned off the shower and pulled back the curtain to find a stack of plush towels on the vanity beside my Dopp kit. I hadn’t heard the door open, but I was sure glad for the towels.
I fastened one large beige towel around my hips and used another to dry my hair. When I opened the bathroom door, Jagger stood outside with a beer in each hand and a smile on his handsome face.
“I wondered if you’d like one of those beers I mentioned earlier. I haven’t started the grill because it’s still early, so there’s no rush. If you need anything, let me know.” Jagger walked away, and I enjoyed the view.
“Hey, Jagger, let’s clear up one thing. Are you gay, straight, or somewhere in between?”
He stopped, turned to face me with a crooked grin, and took a gulp of his Budweiser. “You first.”
I had nothing to hide. “I’m gay as a unicorn jumping over a rainbow. I think you’re sexy as fuck, but I’m not one to push where I’m not wanted.”
Jagger, the hot fucker, started laughing hard as he walked toward me before putting his beer bottle on the floor and stepping into my personal space. He reached for both ends of the towel around my neck and pulled me closer. My body easily slid into his.
“I happen to desire the company of a gorgeous man. And you’re a gorgeous man, Bailey.”
Fuck if he didn’t make my blood boil. The soft lips that found mine were irresistible. His aggressive kiss melted me. When calloused hands touched my neck, I nearly shot off in the towel.
He ended the kiss and pulled away a few inches. “What do you want from me, Bailey?” His voice was breathy as if he were unsure of himself. The sound had my cock hard as steel.
I smirked. “I want to get to know the guy I met at the lake house. I left too soon, but it was either me leaving or strangling Boyd Newton. Or maybe Thomas. Is there any way you’d be interested in letting me fuck you?”
Jagger stiffened. “I’m… This is all new to me, Bailey. I’ve known I was gay for a long time, but I’ve been too afraid to try to meet anyone. Too afraid to act on anything.”
I pushed my hand through his beautiful silver hair. “How do you want this to work, Jagger?”
He stared into my eyes before he exhaled. “I want you naked. I want to feel your body next to mine, but I have no idea what comes next.”
I was surprised, but I knew another guy who had figured himself out later in life. Having your instincts go against everything you’d been taught all your life was a hard pill to swallow. Wrestling with it for years was a story many of us under the rainbow could understand.
“You’ve never been with a man?” I did my level best not to sound like a skeptical asshole.
Jagger glanced at the ceiling before he met my gaze. “I’ve had a blowjob at a club in Lake Tahoe once. I watch porn, and I’ve seen Boyd Newton’s videos. Other than that, I guess I’m a virgin when it comes to being with a man.”
That was fucking hard to believe, but the man had an honest face. “You’ve been with women, right?”
He nodded. “Though not without fault. I… I had a hard time staying…hard.”
I kissed his lips again and reached down to cup his crotch, finding the rock-hard cock I had expected. “That’s not an issue this time, is it?”
Jagger nuzzled into my neck and his lips grazed the sensitive skin there. “No.” His hot breath wafted over my ear, sending shivers down my spine.
I took Jagger’s hand and put it on my chest. “We don’t have to do anything you’d rather not, but I can make you feel good, Jagger.”
“And can I make you feel good, Bailey?”
He seemed so unsure of himself, and for the life of me, I had no idea why. Jagger Hansen was a gorgeous man and a tough SOB, as evidenced by his chosen occupations. He had no reason to be insecure.
Fuck it if it wasn’t his real title. I liked how it made fire dance in his eyes. “Trooper, just looking at you makes me feel good.”
Without hesitating, I dropped to my knees and opened his belt, scanning up his muscular body to see his eyes popping. “This okay?”
Jagger’s eyebrows shot up as if he’d never imagined I’d fall to my knees for him. God knew I was figuring out I’d do damn near anything for him.
“I’d like to suck your cock, Jagger. If you’ll allow it.”
He swallowed. “If you want to, I’m not going to stop you.”
Without saying another word, I unbuttoned his jeans, sliding down the zipper to see the blond hair under his belly button that led to the promised land. I pulled his boxers down to see a gorgeous cock. The musk from him wafted into my nose and made my mouth water.
I slurped his hard prick into my mouth, latching on like he was giving me the milk of human kindness. I loved sucking cock, and having listened when he told me his history, I wasn’t worried about STDs.
Shoving his cock down my throat wasn’t hard to do. I was used to it. Jagger, however, wasn’t.
When I swallowed around the head, he gasped. “Fuck, Bailey, this… I’m not gonna last.”
A moment later, he flooded my mouth, and I swallowed what he had to give me. It was powerful to show a man like Jagger how damn good it could feel to finally be with someone who could appreciate him.
Jagger and I sat on his back patio after he made us a delicious meal. He took the dirty dishes into the house and returned with two glasses of whiskey—and the bottle—as we enjoyed the purples and oranges of the sky over the mountains while the sun went to sleep.
I waited for him to ask questions I didn’t want to answer, but for him, I would. I could see that he was itching to know more about that time in my life, so I prepared myself to answer him honestly.
“So, you mentioned you had a story to tell me that would require something stronger than beer. I have the bottle. You ready?”
No. I was never ready to talk about that time in my life. The pain of what had happened would stick with me for the rest of my days.
I sucked down the whiskey in my glass and poured another. “Ask.”
“I overheard Lindsey and Thomas talking about you suffering a huge loss while you were deployed. What happened?”
After a deep breath, I stared into Jagger’s eyes.
“Thomas was worried about me leaving the military for the wrong reason, which I told him was because I was tired of the bullshit. He thought I had PTSD and would eat my gun after I was out, so I had to tell him the real reason I was leaving, which was, and still is, top secret. If you tell anyone what I’m about to say, you could be breaking about a dozen laws, including treason. ”
“That makes for an exciting future.” Jagger’s crooked smile was becoming my favorite thing.
“Forewarned is forearmed. I had a fuckbuddy arrangement with my commanding officer, Captain Liam McAllistair, but the feelings were one-sided. I was in love with him, and he was in love with advancing his rank, though he did like to fuck.
“We were deployed to Turkey as part of a peacekeeping force. Nusaybin, on the Syrian border. He kept telling me not to get attached because he was a lifer, and we couldn’t be together because it would hinder his promotability.
There were no known generals under the rainbow umbrella, according to Liam. ”
Taking a sip of my second drink, I thought about all those times I snuck into Liam’s quarters on base just to be near him.
He’d also been one to figure out his sexuality later in life, coming down on the bisexual side of things, though he never mentioned any women he was seeing.
We weren’t exclusive, at his insistence, and we only saw each other at Fort Carson, where we were stationed.
Jagger reached for the bottle and poured himself another drink. “You don’t have to tell me any more of the story if it’s too upsetting.”
I set my glass on the table. “It’s not as hard as it used to be.
We were on patrol along the border, and we’d heard rumors from locals that there was a band of ISIS insurgents inhabiting the border with plans to invade Turkey and take out the peacekeeping forces at Camp Justice, where we were assigned.
Of course Liam jumped on the idea of finding them before they found us.
“He asked for volunteers to go on a mission to find the insurgents and hopefully bring them in to turn over to the Turkish government as terrorists. That whole region was a fucking powder keg, not that it isn’t still.
“Our unit was made up of Americans, Canadians, French, and one guy from the UK, all of whom signed up for the mission without hesitation. We geared up and headed out. The ISIS fighters sucked at covering their tracks, but then again, they didn’t plan to return home with the whole suicide-mission attitude.
They found our small encampment, and one of them drove a box truck filled with IEDs into the middle of our group and blew up himself and the truck.
Liam and four others were killed immediately. ”
My throat started to close, so I took another sip.
“I’d been with five other guys on the way to where we believed they were encamped.
We were planning to capture them after dark, but they weren’t where we thought.
It was a miscalculation made by Liam based on faulty intelligence someone higher up the food chain gave him.
“The Army kept it quiet because they said it was an embarrassment to them that one of their captains had gone rogue and led a group of peacekeepers into the mountains on a wild goose chase.
“Liam only had his mother, who he hadn’t spoken to in years, so there was nobody to push for an investigation. Those of us who were on the recon mission were encouraged to keep our mouths shut as to why we were on an unsanctioned operation, or be given a dishonorable discharge.
“I still believe Liam got orders from the colonel in charge of Camp Justice because it wasn’t his style to go off half-cocked on a dangerous endeavor, but nobody was willing to push an investigation.
Nobody in the upper ranks was ever willing to confess they played a part in the clusterfuck, so all the blame fell on Liam’s shoulders.
He wasn’t alive to defend himself, and as much as we tried, it made no difference.
And that is why I decided to leave the Army behind. ”
I wiped away the lone tear falling down my cheek and sucked down the whiskey.