Chapter Ten
Ewen’s throat tightened, the weight of Lamont’s words hitting him harder than he expected. There was something about the honesty and the genuine emotion behind them that struck a chord in his heart. His eyes burned, and he blinked rapidly, trying to hold back the tears threatening to spill over.
“I...” His voice cracked. He cleared his throat and tried again. “I’m not used to that. Someone wanting to be with me…or to protect me.”
Lamont’s arms came around him, and Ewen leaned into the strong arms, taking comfort from someone else in a way he hadn’t allowed himself in years.
“After my mom died three years ago,” Ewen said quietly, the words coming easier when he didn’t have to look at Lamont’s face, “I realized I was completely alone. I mean, I have a sister, but we haven’t spoken in five years.
I’ve got no idea why. She was another person who had just disappeared one day. She didn’t even come to Mom’s funeral.”
Lamont’s hand moved to the back of Ewen’s neck, fingers threading through his hair. The gesture was tender, and yet it grounded him somehow. Ewen closed his eyes and kept talking.
“My dad was never around. Even when Mom was alive, he’d disappear for months at a time.
Business trips, he’d say, but I think he just..
.didn’t want to be with us. He didn’t want a family.
” Ewen’s fingers twisted in the blanket.
“Mom did her best, but she was working two jobs to keep us fed. I learned early on that I had to take care of myself. No one else was going to do it.”
“Ewen…”
“No, let me finish, please. You need to know this about me.” Ewen pulled back just enough to look at Lamont’s face.
“I’m good at taking care of myself. I worked my way through college, got a job at a small paper, then worked my way up to The New York Times.
I check my facts three times over. I protect my sources.
Even with this recent business, I booked a completely different hotel room just to stash my source material.
I’m still paying for two hotel rooms. I’m not the type to take unnecessary risks.
” His voice wavered. “At least, I thought I wasn’t. ”
The memory of that basement crashed over him again - the smell of mold, the bite of zip ties around his wrists and ankles, combined with the certainty that he was going to die in that chair.
“Being captured like that...” Ewen swallowed hard.
“It shook me to my core. I kept wondering if I’d just gotten too cocky, if I had my head so far up my ass that I missed something obvious.
Did I truly believe I was smarter than I actually am?
I don’t know.” He looked down at his hands.
“I’ve always had to be smart enough to survive on my own.
But what if I’m not? What if the only reason I’m alive right now is pure dumb luck? ”
“Now you need to stop.” Lamont’s voice was firm but gentle. He cupped Ewen’s face, tilting it up until their eyes met. “You survived because you’re brilliant. You knew to stash your research, and you knew they were following you. You even had an escape plan.”
Ewen shook his head as he chuckled. “Are you talking about my grand plan that involved breaking paranormal law by shifting in front of humans?”
“It was a plan that kept you alive until I could find you.” Lamont’s thumb brushed across Ewen’s jaw. “Do you want to know what makes me feel like absolute garbage?”
His breath caught at the raw honesty in Lamont’s expression, Ewen shook his head.
“I couldn’t scent you as my mate.” Lamont’s jaw tightened.
“I’m one of the strongest shifter types in existence, and I couldn’t use my nose to tell me you were mine.
None of us hellhounds can do that. We don’t have that ability.
When I met you at Pier888, all I knew was that you intrigued me.
I could tell you had a beautiful soul. I knew I wanted to know more about you, and I was worried about that guy who grabbed your arm” - his hands dropped to Ewen’s shoulders - “but I didn’t know you were mine.
I didn’t know that walking away from you would nearly kill you. That guts me.”
“Technically, you didn’t walk away,” Ewen said quietly. “Lord Hades had already summoned you.”
“I still left you.” Lamont’s voice roughened.
“I felt something pulling me toward you, but I ignored it because I’d stopped looking for a mate centuries ago.
I convinced myself it was just curiosity, professional interest in whatever story you were chasing, maybe.
But because I couldn’t recognize who you are to me, you suffered. ”
Ewen opened his mouth to protest, but Lamont continued.
“Ten days, Ewen. Ten long days. I’ll not forget that in a hurry.
You were alone and hurting for that long because I’m an idiot who didn’t pay attention to what my hound was trying to tell me.
” Lamont’s eyes darkened. “I can’t change that.
I can’t go back and do it differently. But I swear to you, I will spend however long it takes for you to understand that you can absolutely trust me. That you’re not alone anymore.”
The tears Ewen had been holding back finally spilled over. “I want to believe that so badly.”
“Then believe it. Your clever fox can scent that I’m not lying.
” Lamont pulled him closer to where Ewen couldn’t smell anything else but his mate.
“I never had a family, Ewen. Not in the way you did. I don’t know what it’s like to have a mom, or to have lost one.
I wasn’t born to parents. I was created by Lord Hades, fully formed, with a purpose and a job.
My pack - my brothers - are the only family I’ve ever known.
We spent thousands of years together in the Underworld before Lord Hades gave us this chance on Earth. ”
Lamont’s hand moved in slow circles on Ewen’s back.
“As I’ve told you before, when we came to Earth, we had to separate.
Twelve hellhounds in one place would be considered a threat to established covens, packs, and any other paranormal group.
So, we scattered, and we’ve lived apart ever since.
We can communicate through the pack bond, but it’s not the same as being together all the time the way we used to be.
” Lamont’s voice softened. “And now it seems we hadn’t been forgotten.
Slowly, one by one, six of my brothers have found their mates.
I watched them fall in love and create the kind of family and homes I never believed I would have. ”
Ewen wiped at his eyes, listening.
“But I confess that inside, I stopped hoping,” Lamont admitted.
“I didn’t think it would happen to me. My collar box had been down in the Underworld for centuries because I never thought I would need it.
I traveled so much for my own work, and I tried to tell myself that it was okay - that maybe the Fates had made a mistake or forgotten about me, and that was fine as well.
I genuinely believed that I would spend eternity watching my brothers be happy while I stayed alone. ”
“Lamont...”
“But then I met you.” Lamont’s smile was small but genuine.
“And my hound knew. Even if I was too stubborn to listen, he knew you were special to us somehow. He’s been insufferable about it, honestly.
All the time we were in Tuscany - yes, my hound understood protecting Giorgio and Enda was important, but he wanted to track you down immediately. He wouldn’t shut up about it.”
Despite everything, Ewen huffed out a laugh. “Your hound has good instincts.”
“Better than mine, apparently.” Lamont rested his forehead against Ewen’s.
“But maybe it’s time you started relying on your fox instincts, too.
You know what being a fated mate means from an academic sense, now learn what it’s like to live with one.
I understand what it’s like to feel alone, not having anyone watching your back.
And I know what it’s like to suddenly have brothers who would drop everything if I needed them. ”
His breath ghosted over Ewen’s lips. “Now you have that too. It’s not just me - you have the whole pack, all twelve of us, and that’s without Lord Hades and Consort Ali, because you’d better believe they would protect and care for you as well.
You have a family that will protect you, support you, and probably drive you crazy with how much they’ll meddle in our lives. ”
Ewen’s chest tightened, but in a good way. “That all sounds a little overwhelming.”
“It absolutely is,” Lamont agreed. “Damon’s going to want to meet you immediately.
Faron will probably try to feed you - he’s obsessed with cooking since his chef mate has been teaching him how to barbecue, so expect a trip to Australia soon.
Beau’s going to give us relationship advice we didn’t ask for, oh, and wait until you meet Java’s mate, Cyril.
Java owns a hotel in Greece, and Cyril owns a sweet shop about two blocks down from the hotel.
Cyril is a great believer in gift baskets for any occasion.
A whole pack of hellhounds, and six mates so far, and you can’t forget about the children some of them have as well.
It’s chaos. Beautiful, wonderful chaos.”
“I’ve never had chaos like that before.” Ewen’s fingers curled into Lamont’s shirt, quietly glad that his mate seemed to be able to shift into a fully clothed human form.
Ewen wasn’t sure he was ready for a naked Lamont.
He’d like to be, but he wasn’t there quite yet.
“I’ve always had to be careful. I think in the back of my mind, I always knew that one mistake could cost me everything. ”
“You don’t have to be careful with me.” Lamont’s hands framed his face again. “You can make mistakes. You can be reckless. You can chase whatever story you want, and I’ll be right there backing you up because you’re mine, Ewen. My mate. My family. And I protect what’s mine.”
The certainty in Lamont’s voice broke something open in Ewen’s chest. Something that had been locked tight since his mom died, maybe even longer.
Perhaps since his father first walked out, or when he learned through one mishap after another that relying on anyone but himself was a recipe for disappointment.
But Lamont wasn’t anyone. Lamont was his mate. Fated. Chosen by forces older than humanity itself.
“I want to believe you,” Ewen whispered. “I want to trust that you’ll be there. That I don’t have to do everything alone anymore.”
“Then let me prove it.” Lamont’s thumbs brushed away fresh tears.
“Give me the chance to show you that I’m not going anywhere.
That when I say I’ll be with you wherever you go, I mean it in every sense of the word.
Hellhounds can translocate anywhere on Earth or in the Underworld.
You want to chase a story in Tokyo? We’ll go.
You need to interview someone in Antarctica?
Pack warm clothes, and then we’ll go. You want to sit in your apartment in New York and do absolutely nothing?
I’ll be right there doing nothing with you. ”
Ewen laughed. “You’d really go to Antarctica?”
“I’d go anywhere for you.” Lamont said it like it was the simplest truth in the world. And for him, maybe it was. Maybe it was Ewen who was complicating things.
Ewen looked at his mate - the man who was his promised forever. I didn’t realize that the Fates meant that literally. But that’s what had happened. Lamont’s dark eyes held nothing but honesty, determination, and something that looked like wonder.
Ewen’s body was exhausted - he was definitely not ready for anything physical beyond what they were already doing. But he was seized with a sudden urge to kiss Lamont. He had to do it. He needed to close the distance between them and claim the first of what he hoped would be many kisses.
He leaned forward, slow enough that Lamont could pull back if he wanted. But Lamont didn’t move. Didn’t retreat. His eyes widened slightly, then went soft.
And then their lips met.
It wasn’t desperate or demanding – that wasn’t Ewen’s intention even if his fox was keen.
But rather, Ewen was seeking connection – a gentle and soothing connection.
Lamont’s mouth was warm against his, and the bond between them flared warm and comforting through Ewen’s chest. He could feel Lamont’s emotions through their bond - wonder, joy, protectiveness, and underneath it all, a bone-deep certainty that what they shared was right.
Yes, his fox wanted more - he was eager for the full claim from their side, too, but for now the kiss was a hint of what would come.
Lamont’s hand cupped the back of Ewen’s head, supporting him, while the other stayed at his waist. The kiss remained soft, exploratory, a promise rather than a demand.
When they finally pulled apart, Ewen was breathing hard. Lamont looked dazed, his eyes darker than before.
“That was...” Lamont’s voice was rough.
“Yep, it sure was,” Ewen agreed, not trusting himself to form complete sentences.
Lamont pulled him close again, tucking Ewen’s head under his chin. “Sleep, hon. You need to heal, and I’ll make sure there’s more food ready for you when you wake up. Hopefully Lord Hades will let you sleep longer than a few hours this time.”
“Just make sure I have clothes on if we’re making another visit there again.” Ewen managed a grin to show he was teasing, but then he felt another wave of anxiety again.
“Will you stay?” Even as he asked, Ewen knew he was being ridiculous. Lamont had already promised never to leave. But clearly it would take some time before his insecurities could be tucked away.
“Always,” Lamont said simply. “I’m exactly where I want to be.”