41. Cassidy
CASSIDY
I pulled up to Scarlett’s house, giving myself one last mental pep talk. Everything was fine. I was fine. Scarlett had enough on her plate without me showing up looking like I’d just crawled out of my own personal crisis. No, I’d put on my best professional game face for this impromptu workday. This was about helping Scarlett, not me.
Sunlight shimmered on the river behind her sprawling riverside mansion - the kind of place you could afford when you accidentally had twins with a billionaire. I grabbed my briefcase from the passenger seat and headed up the path, past manicured flower beds and tinkling wind chimes.
Before I could even knock, the door opened, and there stood Scarlett, looking a little more frazzled than I was used to seeing her. She had a baby balanced on each hip and she was still in her pajamas.
“Cassidy, thank god. Come in, quick.” Scarlett looked tired, but the happiness was there too, a soft glow behind the exhaustion. For someone who’d had an unplanned pregnancy with a guy she supposedly couldn’t stand, she was doing very well. Though I supposed it helped that the guy had turned out to be absolutely perfect for her, on top of being head over heels in love with her.
I plastered on a bright smile, keeping my voice upbeat. “Hey, you look like you’ve got your hands full.”
Scarlett snorted, shifting one of the baby’s slightly. “That’s one way of putting it. It’s been a morning.”
I set my bag down on a side table. “Would you like me to take one?”
“Oh, if you wouldn’t mind, that would be amazing.”
She handed one of the babies to me and huffed out a sigh of relief.
“Who have I got?”
“That’s Ava. Little Miss Isabella is extra cranky this morning, so I think it’s best she sticks with me.” Scarlett pressed a loving kiss to Isabella’s forehead. “You don’t mind if we do this in the living room?”
“No, that’s fine.”
I followed Scarlett through, careful not to trip on a brightly colored rattle. “So, what’s going on with these little monsters today?”
“Teething, colds, who knows?” Scarlett sank onto the couch, settling Isabella in her arms. “I’ve barely slept, and Rhett’s been at work all day. He said he’d try to get back early, but I just couldn’t drag myself in to the office. Thank you for coming by, really.”
“Honestly, it’s no problem.”
“Okay, let’s get started then. We’ll go over the documents for discovery in the Willis case first, if that sounds good?”
“Yep, great.”
I settled back, cradling Ava against my chest. The baby’s warmth seeped through my blouse, her tiny fist clutching the fabric as she nestled closer. Scarlett passed me a stack of papers, careful not to jostle Isabella.
I was fine. I was completely and utterly fine. It was just a workday, just Scarlett, just a couple of cranky babies. Nothing to do with Harle, or the emptiness that had been gnawing at me since I left his cabin. Nope, nothing at all.
I cuddled Ava closer, inhaling that distinct baby scent, waiting for that punch to the guts feeling of yearning to hit me. It always did at times like this. I waited. And waited some more. But there was...nothing.Oh. Fuck.
Okay, I could work through this. It was probably seeing the downside of parenthood up close. My fiery, strong-willed partner, in pjs with her hair all over the place, clearly trying to get over a rough night. Who wouldn’t question their life choices under those circumstances?
Or maybe it was the realization that I didn’t have a Rhett in my life. There was no steadfast partner to lean on when things got hard. I mean, it wasn’t like I didn’t have support; Hannah and all the girls would help me. Maybe Mom would even pitch in, if Dad would let her. But still, it wasn’t quite the same.
Did I really want to do this on my own? I’d been so, so sure that it was the right path for me, but now it didn’t seem so clear.
Trying to keep the freak out at bay, I forced myself to focus on the documents in front of me. This wasn’t the time or place to have an existential crisis about my life choices. I had work to do, a friend who needed my help, and a baby sleeping peacefully in my arms.
For now, at least, I would pretend everything was normal. That I wasn’t waiting on a life-changing test result. That my heart wasn’t aching for a man I’d promised myself I wouldn’t fall for. Don’t do that. You are way too much of a mess to give yourself to someone. Never again.