50. Harle
HARLE
I waded into the lake, still wearing my jeans and t-shirt. The water felt shockingly cold against my skin, but that was what I wanted. I needed something, anything, to numb the ache. When it was deep enough, I dove under, the chill biting at my body as I cut through the water. The world went silent, muffled by the water pressing against my ears.
My lungs started to ache, so I surfaced and stood, sluicing my hair back, my eyes fixed on the far shore.
Nothing had come from Hannah hiring the PI. No word from Cassidy.
My chest hurt. A deep, hollow pain that nothing seemed to fill, no matter how I tried. I rubbed at it absently, my gaze unfocused as it swept over the rippling water and the distant tree line. It should have been peaceful. It should have helped. But nothing seemed to take the edge off anymore.
Everything was filled with memories of Cassidy. The way her lips curved when she was teasing me about something, that half-smile that always felt like it was meant just for me. The quiet, almost absent-minded way she’d tuck her hair behind her ear when she was thinking. How she smelled. All soft, sweet, like rain and fresh linen. It all lived in my mind now, uninvited but so fucking vivid. And every single memory hit like a punch to the gut, a reminder of what I’d almost had, and what I’d completely lost.
I dragged a hand down my face, the cold water dripping off me doing nothing to ease the heat behind my eyes. I hadn’t counted on this. On how completely she’d burrowed into me, leaving nothing untouched. I thought I could handle it. That I could give her the space she needed, keep my emotions in check, and wait her out. But this? This was unbearable. Cassidy was gone, and it felt like she’d taken some essential piece of me with her.
I dragged in air, trying to force the tightness in my chest to ease, the cold water lapping at my sides, grounding me in the here and now. But the hurt persisted, and all I could do was stand there, staring at the lake, drowning in the ache of loving her.