Chapter 19 Way Back When #2
Jace was so excited, her words cascaded over each other. “I’ve booked you a summer European tour, babe. We’re going to Paris. And Amsterdam, and Berlin, and a bunch of other places. Happy birthday!”
Paloma put her fork down. “Wait, another tour? When?”
“In a couple of months. The headliner dropped out, and the promoter reached out to ask if you could fill in. It’s an insane opportunity. There’s lots of love for American indie music over there, and we’d get to see more of the world together!”
“I thought we were going to stay home for the summer. Rest and relax for a few months.”
Jace’s smile dimmed a few watts. “We’ll do that when we get back.”
Paloma’s heart rate felt like it had doubled in a matter of seconds. “And by then you will have booked another batch of gigs.”
Jace looked puzzled. “Well, that’s what you do for a living.”
“I make more in album sales than concerts. The new record will be out this fall, and we can live off the advance until then. We don’t need to tour again so soon.”
“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but unless we are really frugal, you may not make back the advance this time.”
That was unexpected. “Why? Do you think the songs suck?”
“God, no! Why do you automatically assume I’m criticizing you? Your material is fantastic, but that’s not the issue here. You’ve heard of Napster, right?”
“Yeah. Nerds downloading songs onto their computers.”
“But then they can send those songs to their friends or post them on a website without buying a record in the first place. Nothing’s stopping them from stealing and sharing your music, and you’re not getting a dime.
And it’s not just nerds using it anymore.
Just about every high school and college kid in America has a Napster account these days. ”
Paloma’s palms started to get clammy. “They can’t keep this up. The labels will go to court to shut it down.”
Jace sighed uneasily. “The genie’s out of the bottle, babe.
Once folks realize they don’t have to buy a whole album to get the one song they like, they aren’t going to shell out fifteen bucks for the CD.
And if they’re getting it for free, they won’t even have to pay for the single.
” Jace put her hand over Paloma’s. “Look, don’t worry about this.
I’m making sure you’re going to be okay, even if record sales take a dip.
And this European tour couldn’t have come at a better time.
You can tease the new album and boost sales for your current catalogue while getting your cut of ticket and merch sales that Napster can’t touch. We’ll be fine. You’ll be fine.”
Paloma took her hand back. “But you promised we’d stay home for the summer.”
“I know you’re tired right now, but we’ll have two whole months before this happens. You can rest up.”
“I have to finish writing the songs, then I’m going to be in the studio. None of that is relaxing. Plus, I want a life beyond just being on the road all the time.”
“It sounds like a lot, but if we can just—”
“You promised, Jace!” she shouted. “You said we’d be home for the summer, maybe the rest of the year!”
“Okay, okay,” Jace said, her hands up as if she was trying to calm a growling dog. “I’m sorry.”
Hot tears were trailing down Paloma’s cheeks. “Why won’t you listen to me? It’s my career. It’s my life!”
“It’s our life,” Jace blurted.
“I can’t believe you’re making this about you!”
“I’m not! I honestly thought you’d want to go to Paris.”
“To work?”
“Yes, work would be a piece of it, but you’d told me you’d always wanted to see the Eiffel Tower, and I wanted to surprise you for your big birthday.” Jace sounded crestfallen. “I thought you’d be thrilled.”
Paloma wiped her tears with the back of her hand.
She felt like she’d been thrown in the ocean and had to thrash her way back to shore.
Jace was so good at remembering dates, names, conversations.
She knew the business end of their partnership so well.
Why was she often so blind to what Paloma really wanted and needed?
Then again, what kind of idiot would turn down a trip to Paris?
Jace was right: Paloma had always wanted to go there, especially on the arm of someone she loved.
And if doing a few dates would help weather the financial storms Jace saw on the horizon, why not just do them?
What was wrong with that? What was wrong with her?
Paloma took a couple of breaths to steady herself. “I’m sorry. You found this amazing, romantic opportunity, and I shit all over it.” She paused, thinking about Napster. “Do you really think CDs are on their way out?”
Jace shrugged. “I don’t know for sure. There’s always some new technology out there that’ll make the current one obsolete.
But seeing live music? That’s something no computer can replicate, and people will always pay for concert tickets because they know if they don’t, they may miss the experience of a lifetime.
Especially if you’re the one they’re coming to see. ”
“I’m not sure I can keep living up to the hype, though,” Paloma said with a sniffle, fiddling with the napkin in her lap.
“All of those people will get tired of me, maybe sooner rather than later. Tastes change so fast. I can count on one hand the indie bands that are around a year after they break through.”
Jace shook her head. “You’re not just any indie band. I’ve seen a lot of them, and I’ve never seen anyone better than you. Last night’s show was maybe the best one you’ve ever done, and your next show will be even more fantastic. Believe me.”
Paloma looked at Jace, with her beautiful eyes and serious expression.
This was the first woman she’d ever dated, the first person who she’d ever wanted to make a life with, the first professional to believe in her talent and range.
She was sincere, she was loyal. She adored the large gesture and the finer details.
She made Paloma laugh. She made Paloma feel safe and protected.
Jace was her first love, and Paloma would do anything to keep her by her side.
If she did anything to make Jace leave, Paloma didn’t think she would survive.
Plastering a smile over all her fears, Paloma said, “Okay, I’ll do the tour. ”
“Really? You will? So you forgive me?” Jace said, crying and laughing at once.
“What is there to forgive?” Paloma replied, hoping her tears looked like joy.
Jace pulled her to her feet to share a kiss. Paloma relaxed in her arms, wishing with all her might that she could power through the European dates and return home with her nerves intact, for Jace’s sake…and the sake of their relationship.
The clock ticking toward checkout, they finished their elaborate meal, even though it had grown cold. Jace was about to pack her laptop when she asked, “Do you want to check your email before we go to the airport? See who’s wishing you happy birthday?”
“Sure.” Paloma logged into her AOL account and scanned her inbox, which was overflowing with messages from her friends waiting for her in Detroit, sending love and promises to get together and celebrate her birthday once she was back.
Including one from Nolan. They’d run into each other at shows around Detroit a few times since the festival in Ferndale the previous summer, and they’d grabbed lunch together a few weeks earlier to check in on each other, musician to musician. His email said:
Howdy, birthday girl!
I’m sure all of Chicago was at your feet last night. I know how hard touring is for you, and I know how much you’re looking forward to a nice, long break back home. You’ve earned it, superstar!
Hope you saved me a slice of cake. See you soon.
XO