31. Chapter Twenty-Eight
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Rose
B arry drummed on the steering wheel as we drove back to his place.
“Nervous?” I asked. “Or excited?”
I knew I was. It had been too long since I’d met fans in person. I’d been working so much that I almost forgot what it was like to see them. In the sea of the angry ones online, I was glad to see that some liked the album.
“I think my sister might figure you out.”
My mood instantly deflated. “What? Why? How? ”
“She’s smart. Way too smart. And I saw the way she kept looking at you at dinner.”
“I mean, people look at me all the time.”
“Ruth is not most people. Plus, she saw us whispering before we brought up Lila.”
“What are the odds that she’ll figure out we’re one person, though?”
“I have no idea,” he said. “But I know it’s risky. You can cancel if you think this is a bad idea.”
“And disappoint Max? No way. Do you think the explanation of the coffee shop helped?”
“Maybe.”
“I could even mention the day I saw her as Lila to throw her off the trail even more.”
“That might work, but be careful. Be fully Lila tomorrow. She may not be watching every second, but she picks up on stuff.”
“I’ll do my best. I’ve been doing this for over ten years. I’ve got this. I’ll even have Juno come to tell me if I’m acting too much like Rose.”
That seemed to help. His drumming slowed. “I just don’t want to ruin this for you. This privacy you have, despite your fame, is . . . incredible.”
“Thank you, but I think it’ll be okay. Ruth will officially meet Lila Wilde tomorrow, not just running into her at Movers and Shakers. She’ll be busy with that.”
“You’re probably right,” he said as we pulled up to the bar.
All thoughts of our plans for the next day dropped when we saw how hectic things were. People were in line, more so than I had ever seen.
“Audrey was right about the dance nights,” he said. “They’re always this busy now.”
“Do you need to go check on things?”
“Yeah, I should. Will you be okay in my apartment?”
“Of course I will, especially since you bought me my own chair and everything.”
Barry laughed and pulled me into him, his lips slotting over mine. My heart could have stopped, but he let me go soon after.
“I’ll walk you up there,” he offered.
I nodded and got out of the car. As he opened the back door, I was already thinking about what to do with my free time, but then two people were in the doorway, as if waiting on us.
The woman had black hair and thick eyeliner. She looked catlike in this light. The guy with blond hair I dimly recognized as the dancing bartender.
“You have some explaining to do,” Liam said.
The woman elbowed him hard, eyes on me.
“Liam, Audrey,” Barry said slowly. “Do you guys need help with the bar?”
“No, we have employees on everything,” Audrey said. “And I guess we can talk about this when you don’t have a guest.”
“Rose was just going up to my apartment,” he said. “So we can talk work.”
“It’s not work related,” Audrey said. “But we do have questions.”
“I’ll just go,” I said. “See you upstairs.”
I walked off but stopped around the corner, half listening to see if it was bad news.
“When were you going to tell us you recorded a song with a certain famous woman?” Audrey asked.
I froze. Technically, this was about a version of me. This was the second time Barry was confronted about something with Lila in one night and I owed him a major thank you for all of this.
“Why do you think that’s me?” he asked.
“Because we know how you sound when you sing,” Liam said. “And we’ve listened to it a hundred times to make sure. It’s you. There’s no way it’s not.”
I heard him curse.
“Barry,” Audrey said, “why didn’t you put your name on this? It’s awesome!”
“I didn’t feel the need to.”
“But you sound great. You could make more.”
“I have a job to do here. I can’t juggle both songwriting and this. You both saw how much I wasn’t here when I was working on this album.”
“And the bar ran smoothly.”
“The bar is my responsibility. I refuse to shirk it off, no matter how much I enjoyed it.”
“It was only for a few weeks,” Audrey said. “We handled it. What if you got another chance like this?”
“I don’t have another chance like this. Guys, it’s fine.”
But my mind was spinning. He could have another chance. He could step in as my rhythm guitarist while we practiced. He would fit.
Barry didn’t want the fame and he wouldn’t have to leave full time.
The idea was perfect. I knew Malia and Justice’s process of holding auditions and dealing with the legalities of a contract would have us stopped for far too long. There had been talk of having Jason come back for practice, but his mom had taken a turn for the worse, so he couldn’t.
I just needed to convince him of my idea, which would be hard, considering how much he loved the bar.
I thought I would have more time to come up with a valid argument, but Barry rounded the corner.
“O-oh,” I said, rubbing the back of my neck. “I thought you were working.”
“I didn’t hear the door up the stairs shut. Did you hear all of that?”
“Sorry. I figured it was about Lila, so it was kind of okay.”
“It was, but you don’t need to worry. They don’t know anything.”
“I wasn’t worried about that. I trust you. It’s just . . . you do have another chance, you know.”
“For songwriting?”
“For . . . something in music. My tour needs a guitarist.”
He immediately shook his head. “I can’t—?”
“Not full time. I know you can’t leave things here and I won’t ask that of you. But you can help us practice while we look for someone. Maybe only for a few weeks.”
He considered it for a long, hopeful moment, but then shook his head again. “I can’t leave. I’m sorry, but I can’t.”
“But your employees just said they can handle the bar. What does it hurt to ask? It’s not for forever. I won’t pressure you if you truly don’t want to do it—?”
“I do want to do it.”
“Then bring it up with them. What’s the harm in trusting your team and letting them take care of you for once?”
His lips pressed together and then he let out a long sigh. “I’ll ask. I can’t promise anything.”
“That’s enough,” I said, smiling. “Thank you, Barry.”
“Go upstairs. I’m going to make sure they’re really okay.”
“I’ll talk to Juno about tomorrow.”
I called her after Barry shut the door behind him. She answered on the fifth ring, which was late for her.
“Hey, what do you need?”
“I hope I’m not interrupting anything,” I began.
“Not at this very second.”
“Did it go well with the flight attendant?”
“Very. Now, what’s up?”
“I’m going to meet some people in Nashville tomorrow and it might be good to have my bodyguard there.”
“Yeah, I’ll be free.”
“And also, it’s Barry’s family. And I’ve met all of them as Rose.”
“Wow. Um, is that a good idea?”
“Not really, but Barry’s nephew is so sweet and loves Lila. I don’t want to let him down, but I need to watch myself closely and be sure Rose doesn’t slip tomorrow.”
“I can help with that.”
“And watch Ruth. She’s apparently very smart.”
“Watch you and a woman named Ruth. Got it. I’ll come and get you tomorrow.”
“Thank you. For both doing this and not lecturing me about how this could be a bad idea.”
“You’ll have Barry with you, so he’ll help too. Besides, you deserve to do some things you like. I know that now.”
I couldn’t help the smile that bloomed on my face as I thanked her once again. I let her get back to her night and I worked on relaxing.
And that turned into songwriting. I was too inspired being in Barry’s home in a city of music. I was still thinking of that kiss from earlier, the one that was far too short.
I was jotting a few lyrics in my notebook when Barry walked in the door.
“So they weren’t lying,” he said, “they don’t need me.”
“Did you ask them about coming to LA?”
“Not yet. They might have the bar under control, but they were incredibly busy. What are you up to?”
“Writing a song,” I admitted.
“Aren’t you supposed to be on a break?”
“My inspiration doesn’t take those, unfortunately.”
“What are you writing?”
“Something I don’t think I can ever put in a song. The lyrics are . . . horny.”
“They’re what ? Let me see.”
I handed over my notebook, cheeks warming.
I didn’t write sexy stuff since my fans were younger, and I doubted I would change that. Some people still complained that I’d started cursing in my work. This was only for me and I hoped Barry didn’t think it was too much.
“You should definitely make a song out of this.”
“Really?”
“For one thing, it’s great. And for another, I wouldn’t mind the world knowing that you feel this way for someone, especially if it’s me.”
“Of course it’s you.” I rolled my eyes. “You’re the one who gave me that kiss in the car. It was only like a second, but it was enough.”
“If you come here, sunshine, I’ll finish the job.”
And just like that, I was a woman who followed orders. My notebook was forgotten on the counter the second I stepped into his space and pressed my lips against his again.
In seconds, I was desperate to have more of him. His woodsy, warm scent enveloped me, flushing all my senses with his presence.
My hands moved down his broad shoulders, feeling the taut muscles flexing underneath my touch. His mouth opened in a groan. I deepened the kiss, my tongue grazing his, and he pressed into me farther.
My skin was on fire, lit by him and him alone. He moved off of me only to slide his hand to grip my ass, pulling my hips flush with his.
“Is hair still off the table?” he asked. “Or was that just a Lila thing?”
“T-the second one,” I said, nearly gasping for air. “You can do whatever you like to me now.”
Barry brought his mouth back to mine, his hand running through my hair and grazing my scalp. I let out a gasp. That part of me was sensitive, a fact I’d never known before since it was used to the abuse from being under a wig so much. I was pressed into the cool counter, the sharp edge digging into my back.
“B-bedroom?” I managed to ask.
Then suddenly, I was there, being flopped onto the bed by the man who had my whole attention. His mouth returned to me as he settled between my open legs.
I was ready for this. So ready it almost hurt.
“Fuck, sunshine,” he said into my neck. “You don’t know what you do to me.”
I gasped as he tugged down my shirt. His mouth found my nipple, teasing it gently with his tongue.
All thoughts were lost to sensation. His other hand slid past the waistband of my sleep shorts, finding my aching core.
He made a noise when he touched my slick folds and I wanted to tell him it was all for him. I couldn’t, though, because I lost the ability to speak once his finger dragged across my clit.
I didn’t often have time for myself with the tour going on, but sometimes I remembered that night when he’d given me the best orgasm of my life. This felt like it could pale in comparison.
I jerked into him, wanting more, and he sucked on my nipple harder and pressed his fingers in tighter.
“Yes,” I said. “Just like that.”
I was soaring, pleasure building up inside of me, making my toes curl. I arched off the bed, feeling myself break as fire erupted from my core and spread through me. Gasping, I was consumed until I was only a puddle in Barry’s arms.
“Was it good?” he asked.
“Y-yeah,” I said. “So good. Better than last time.”
His lips came down on mine again, and I angled my hips up. I could feel the details of his cock as he pressed against me, despite the jeans he wore.
I wanted him inside of me. I needed him inside of me. Last time, I was too tired to take anything further, but I was wide awake now.
“Fuck me,” I said.
“Are you sure?”
“Very.” I pressed into him again and dragged my hands under his shirt. I only got a touch of warm skin before he pulled back and took off his shirt. “You’re not wasting any time.”
“With you in my bed? Absolutely not.”
His pants were next, but I stood as he went for his underwear.
“I want to do this part,” I said, placing my hands on the band.
“You can do whatever you want.”
I hooked the elastic in my fingers and dragged it down his toned legs. His cock sprung free and my mouth went dry imagining it inside of me.
When I straightened, his eyes were dark. “Your turn,” he said. He gently pushed me back down on the bed and grabbed at my shorts, pulling them off my body. Once that was done, my shirt was next.
“You’re beautiful, you know that?”
“And you are too. How did I get so lucky?”
“How did I get so lucky?”
I kissed him, needing to feel him on me again. He hovered over me as he maneuvered his cock right at the entrance of my pussy, ready to push inside of me.
“We should get a condom,” he said.
“I have an IUD and I get tested. I don’t have anything.”
“Neither do I, but I don’t usually do this without other forms of protection.”
“You can get one,” I said. “But I would also love to feel you bare inside of me.”
His eyes darkened as his mouth came down on mine again. “Only with you,” he muttered into my lips, “would I do this.”
I hooked my legs around him, bringing him closer and moving him slightly inside of me.
My core clenched, desperate to feel more. He slowly slid in the rest of the way. I gasped, breaking the kiss as my head fell back on the pillow.
“Are you okay?”
“More than okay,” I said.
“Good,” he replied. “Because I don’t think I can hold back anymore.”
He pulled out and slammed back in. His hips jerked as his cock sank inside me repeatedly. He tried to kiss me again, but our lips barely touched as both of us were lost in how good and right this felt.
There was nothing as good as this, I decided. Nothing. I was floating again, my body enjoying each of his thrusts. I could feel the heat building.
“I’m gonna . . .?” I trailed off, lost in sensation.
“Do it, sunshine. Come on my cock.”
And I did. I let out a near yell as my vision whited out. Pure pleasure danced up my spine and took over my brain.
“Fuck,” he said, and his thrusts became erratic. I felt him come just as my orgasm faded away.
“You’re good at sex, singing, and guitar,” I said as my mind came back online. “Is there anything you’re not good at?”
“Not thinking of you.”
Barry
While I wanted nothing more than a round two with Rose the next morning, I didn’t get a chance because she had to spend the day getting ready to meet Max and everyone else as Lila. It took a long time for her to become a completely different person, and while I knew why, I also wanted more time with her.
The plan was to meet in the middle of the day at Tom and Selena’s place. Tom wasn’t in much of the public eye, making his place safer than any of ours. Despite it being a weekday, everyone made the time to see Lila Wilde—other plans didn’t matter when she was involved.
I was sent to wait with everyone while she arrived. Rose told me it would make us look less close.
“Whew,” Max said, nearly dancing on his feet. “What do I say to not look like a fool?”
“She’s nice,” I promised. “Just like any other person. You don’t need to worry about everything you say to her.”
“Yeah, but I want to tell her I’ve listened to all of her songs. Is that too much?”
“I don’t think so.”
Tom watched from where he was sitting on the couch. He and I hadn’t talked yet, but I was sure he was wondering why I was letting it slip that I knew Lila, especially since I’d been so tight-lipped about it before.
I wondered when he was going to corner me to ask all of his questions, but Selena walked into the room, her face looking exactly like Max’s, and that took his attention.
“How do I not be weird?” she asked.
“I just asked that! Well, kind of,” Max said. “And it’s no use. We’re both about to be so weird.”
Tom tried to placate the both of them, but as time went on, Selena and Max only seemed to grow more nervous, as if they could possibly mess this up.
They didn’t know it yet, but I doubted this would be their only chance to see her. They’d already charmed Lila when she was someone else.
Ruth walked in, hair down, chatting animatedly with Lynn. “And she has so many cool lyrics,” she said. “I love everything she’s written.”
“I’ll have to ask what her favorite song is,” Lynn said. “And I’ll start there.”
“Thank you for coming, even if you don’t know her all that well.”
“You like her, though; that’s what matters to me.”
I couldn’t resist smiling at the two of them. It was nice seeing Ruth so comfortable with Lynn. It was the connection she never had with Mom.
We saw Juno’s blacked-out car pull up and a hush fell over all of us. Even my heart pounded, but for different reasons.
Lila got out of the car, all dark hair and sunglasses. From far away, hardly anyone would recognize her.
When she walked in the door, the sunglasses came off and she smiled at everyone.
“Hi,” she said warmly. “It’s good to meet you.”
Her makeup was heavier than usual, casting a stark difference between her and Rose. Her voice was also clear and loud, adding another thing that set her apart from her alter ego. I let out a breath of relief as Ruth smiled with no sign of suspicion.
Rose had been right. She had been doing this long enough to know exactly what to do.
“Hi!” Max was the first to speak. “I literally can’t believe this is real.”
Tom laughed. “Don’t forget to introduce yourself.”
“Right! I’m Max, and this is my mom.” He dragged Selena by her arm.
“Hello,” she said weakly.
“Hi. I don’t bite. I promise.”
Selena let out a mix of a laugh and a gasp.
“It’s nice to meet you for the first time,” Ruth said with a wink.
For a second, I cursed. Was this Ruth’s way of hinting that she knew?
“Oh yeah,” Lila said, not missing a beat and winking back. “We’ve definitely never met before.”
How was she not freaking out? How did she not see what Ruth was hinting at?
But then Ruth caught onto my expression and she mouthed the bar .
Oh. They were talking about the day Ruth and Lila had met. It had nothing to do with Rose at all. I nodded, trying to remember that Lila knew exactly what she was doing.
“Hi,” Lynn said. “I’m Lynn.”
“She’s my boyfriend’s mom that I steal sometimes.”
“I’ve heard your songs on the radio at my salon,” Lynn said. “You’re incredible. I haven’t listened to any of it in my own time, though, so you’ll have to tell me your favorite place to start.”
“Thank you. I would say my oldest album.”
“I totally agree,” Max said. “By the way, it’s so cool that Uncle Barry knows you. How did that happen?”
“I was on the run from paparazzi and he was at the wrong place at the wrong time.” She smiled at me and she was a mirror image of Rose for a split second.
“We’ve been friends ever since,” I said, but I could already see Ruth looking between us.
Considering she’d just seen me with Rose last night, I knew it was better to clarify our status so she didn’t get nosy about the two women in my life.
“That’s so cool,” Max said. “And also, Goodbye, Hello is amazing . Especially your mysterious singer.”
“Oh yeah, he’s a friend . . .?” She trailed off. “I mean, not a friend. He’s more.”
It was a genius move, playing off the man who had sung that song as someone more. I knew it was only to cover herself, but it kicked my heart into gear.
“Could you maybe sign mine?” Max asked. “Oh! And the record my dad gave me. We really bonded over you.”
“Of course,” Lila said. “Does anyone have a pen?”
She spent time signing things and getting to know Max. I thought we were in the clear until Ruth and Tom found me.
“So . . . friends, huh?” Her voice was light, but I froze anyway.
“Yep.”
“And Rose?”
“More than friends.”
“Do they know about each other?” Tom asked.
“Of course. We all communicate very well.”
She nodded slowly, but her lips were pressed together. “You were really torn up about Lila, though.”
“In the end, she was right. Doing all of this would be too much.”
“But—?”
“Ruth,” Tom began, “I trust Barry to be telling the truth.”
“He’s acting weird. I’ve noticed you’ve been glancing over at me. Did I do something wrong or something?”
“No,” I rushed to say. My brain finally came up with a reason. “You’re just also a fan of Lila, so I’m watching your reaction because I want to make sure you’re happy.”
She blinked. “Really?”
No. And I felt like shit for lying. I did care about her reaction and wanted her to have fun, but I was more invested in her not figuring out Rose’s secret.
“Come on,” Tom urged, “we have Lila Wilde here for only a little bit. Let’s not worry about Barry and focus on her being here.”
“God, you’re right. I need to get out of my own head. Sorry, Barry. I just wouldn’t be a true girl’s girl if I saw you with two women and didn’t ask.”
“I wouldn’t dare hurt any of them. Trust me, lines have been drawn in the sand.”
“Keep them that way,” she said. “Both Rose and Lila are nice. I wouldn’t want them to get hurt.”
“Me either,” I said. “I promise you that.”
She seemed pleased and walked over to have Lila sign something. I let out a breath of relief.
Lila chatted with everyone, including getting caught up in a conversation with Lynn about hair care. I lingered on the sidelines.
“So, everything work out like you hoped?” Tom asked. I had completely forgotten about telling him anything that had happened.
“Yeah, I’m happy with it.”
“Good. That’s all we wanted for you, Barry.”
When we got back, it was late, and Rose went upstairs, saying she had a song idea she wanted to write down. As much as I wanted to go and help her, there was something else I needed to do.
I’d promised that I would ask Liam and Audrey if they would be okay with me going to LA for a few weeks. I doubted it, considering the line that spilled out into the street. I’d only left them for a few days before, and even then, it had been nerve-racking to come back.
Audrey was heatedly discussing something with a bouncer, her brow furrowed. When I saw her expression, I knew nothing good could be happening.
“What’s going on?”
She looked up, mouth still pressed into a thin line. “Some woman was way too drunk. She got angry when we cut her off. Don’t worry about it. I have it taken care of.”
“Still, I—?”
“It’s all good,” she said, shaking her head. “Now, what did you come over here for? Do you need me for something?”
“Yes, but more for a talk. I need you and Liam for this.”
“All right. Let me get him.”
“Where is he? I didn’t see him at the bar.”
“He put one of the new guys you hired on it. The cooler desperately needed organizing.” She waved for me to follow her, but I had to take a second. The cooler had been on my to-do list since I returned from LA. I hadn’t even asked Liam to work on it.
Was I paying them enough? Maybe they needed another raise.
“Oh, hey!” Liam said, a bright smile on his face as he popped out of the walk-in cooler. “I thought I heard you come in.”
“I can’t believe you’re not dancing tonight.”
“And miss out on being in a literal cooler? I’m good. Besides, Jeremy’s incredible anyway.”
I’d known he would be. I was good at sniffing out new hires who would be perfect for the team.
And I wouldn’t be able to do that in LA. Fuck. Just another reason that made me have to stay.
“I believe you have something to bring up with us?” Audrey asked.
Shit. Right. The thing I’d been dreading.
Clearing my throat, I said, “So maybe you were right.”
“You’ll have to be more specific,” Liam said. “There’re a lot of things Audrey’s right about.”
She preened under the praise. “You know me so well.”
I sighed, knowing she’d be like Ruth and not make admitting this easy at all. “You were right about me having another chance at something in LA.”
Both of them froze for a moment. “What is it?” Audrey asked.
“Someone . . . famous needs a fill-in guitarist. It’s not a permanent thing and it’s only for a few weeks, which is longer than I think I can leave for.”
Audrey and Liam glanced at each other. I wondered if they were working on how to tell me no. I had stuff to do anyway. I could probably work on adding more bouncers to the staff or maybe look into hiring another person to help Audrey with clerical work. They did a lot, but I couldn’t expect them to do it all.
Audrey pulled out the walkie-talkie that she only used to communicate with the security staff.
“Hey, Joe?” she asked.
“Yeah?” his deep voice answered.
“Can you be sure Barry Murray doesn’t come back for a few weeks?”
I opened my mouth to ask her what the hell she was doing, but she put up a finger.
“Uh, sure. Why?”
“Because he has something he absolutely has to take care of in LA, and knowing him, he’ll try to find a reason to stay.”
“Oh, is it that thing you wanted him to do? That you said he was being a stubborn ass about?”
“Yep. And I was right. Go figure.”
Joe laughed. “I’ll keep a lookout for him. You’ll have to deal with his wrath, though.”
“Oh, I’m prepared.” She put away the walkie-talkie and finally looked at me. “Sorry, boss. But you’re kicked out. It’s for your own good.”
“Am I being pranked?” I asked.
“Nope.” Liam shook his head. “I’m the one who pranks. She is stone-cold serious.”
“Not to say I told you so,” Audrey added, “but I told you so. We already had a plan for this. Now get your ass to LA and enjoy yourself. We’ll call you if we need you.”