Chapter 20 Sadie
SADIE
The auditorium is quiet.
Well, not completely. The exit sign hums, and I can hear the heat begin to come on as the pipes click. But compared to the chaos of the last few weeks, this feels peaceful.
I sit on the edge of the stage, legs dangling, the clipboard for once resting beside me instead of clutched in a death grip. The stage is pretty sturdy, so I do need to acknowledge he did a good job building it.
Danny walks in from the back hallway with two coffees. I can smell the caramel as he hands me a cup. “Extra whipped.”
“Thanks,” I say as I take a careful sip, and he sits beside me, shoulder barely brushing mine.
“I have something for you.”
I turn my head to him. “If this is a joke about sucking your di–”
“Sadie Johnson!” he exclaims, and it makes me laugh. “You are acting downright filthy, and we are in school!” he whispers the last word, and it makes me laugh harder.
Today has been quite a day. I was tested, and although I want to be mad, I know why he did it. I have to appreciate it because he helped me see something I didn’t want to.
I can do anything I want to, whether it’s planned or not.
He opens his backpack, which has been lying on the stage, and pulls out a wrapped gift. It looks like a book, and I eye him before taking it. “Is this a Dr. Seuss book?”
“Oh, the Places You’ll Blow Me is a classic. We should write our own.”
I shake my head at his nonsense and tear off the wrapping paper. It looks like a plain binder, but when I open the front cover, I see it’s a planner. There are colored tabs with stickers for dates, events, and everything right down to times. It’s sweet and so me.
“I want to go on record and say I bought this prior to today's episode. But I was still proud to see you go off-script.” He taps it. “It’s a planner for all the events you’re going to be scheduling once everyone sees how amazing this gala is going to be.”
I look at him, trying to keep tears at bay because he gets it. He just gets me. “I know I make you crazy because I’m uptight.”
“No,” he says. “I think I make you crazy because you think I’m careless. But I said this before, Sadie. I push you because you’re the most alive when you stop planning and just feel.”
“I know it’s just a town gala,” I say, “but it’s not just that to me. This was supposed to be my shot. My chance to show them and myself, actually, that I can do this. That I can run something bigger than school bake sales and wine tastings.”
Danny stays quiet, listening.
“I know people think I’m controlling, uptight, or a little much,” I say, quieter now because it’s embarrassing to actually admit I know that's what they think. “But it’s only because I care. And when you care that much and it doesn’t go right, it feels like you’re the failure. Not the event, me.”
My throat tightens, but I don’t let myself cry. Danny sets his coffee down beside him, then takes mine from my hands and does the same, looking at me. There’s something raw in his face—something I’ve spent a long time trying not to see.
“Let those people think what they want. Can I tell you what I see?” he asks, and I nod.
“I see a woman who walked into this room and made magic happen. You’re giving kids a Christmas they’ll never forget.
You even got grown adults to follow a minute-by-minute timeline, and somehow, they had fun doing it. ”
I let out a shaky laugh. “Debatable.”
He ignores it. “You turned a plain old school auditorium into a Christmas party. You got the mayor to show up early. You convinced the PTA to fund glitter for eight classrooms. Glitter is actually banned here at Starlight Bay Elementary. But clearly, you make miracles happen, Sadie.”
I giggle at his nonsense but look down at my hands as I fidget. He reaches over and gently stills them.
“You’re not just about to pull off an event,” he says. “You’re building a lasting event that will have kids and parents excited to be a part of for each coming year. You made this mean something.”
The air shifts, and he hops off the stage and stands in front of me, taking my hands and urging me to stand now, too. He pulls me in, and I circle my arms around him and don’t pull away.
“You know, this whole time, I dreaded doing this with you. You’re late, you joke too much, and I still want to kill you 80% of the time.”
“Only eighty?” He grins, with that boyish charm that continues to drive me crazy. “I’m improving.”
I smile and shake my head. “But it’s actually turned out to be something good.
You keep me on my toes, and well, maybe I need that.
” I look down at his chest, studying the buttons on his shirt.
“When we were together, I was scared,” I admit, almost in a whisper.
“I was scared of how easy it was to lose control around you.”
“I’d never do anything to hurt you, or allow anything to happen that would.”
“I know that, I just,” I swallow hard, “love to me always looked a certain way, and when I met you, it didn’t fit. But it felt right, and I didn't know how to adjust.”
We rock ever so slightly, and he brushes my hair off my shoulder.
“It still feels right to me. Sadie, I fell hard for you from that first night we went out. From your perfectly planned first date that I did everything to try to ruin.” We both laugh together.
“But if I’m being honest, I want nothing more than to ruin every date we have from here on out. ”
He doesn’t move; he just waits for me to respond. I don’t know how because the words don't shock or scare me; they just kind of are there, like I was expecting him to say it. My heart is racing, but I’m not running.
“Sadie, I’m falling in love with you.”
I close my eyes and step back but don’t let go of him. “Danny—”
“I don’t need you to say it back,” he blurts. “Not after how I pushed you today. But I need you to know how I’m feeling. I’m not here to mess with you. I’m here because I miss what we had, and I want what’s waiting for us if we give it a real try.”
I blink fast. I will not cry.
He watches me with this maddening patience I never gave him credit for before. And for the first time, I let myself imagine this version of us. Not perfect or planned, just real.
This time, I did drag him back to my house.
We didn’t take a lingering walk home. No, we each jumped in our cars and raced to my house.
Four minutes later, we were parking, running up my walkway to the porch.
When the front door clicks shut behind us, Danny has my back pressed against it, one hand cupping my cheek like I’m made of glass, the other gripping my waist like he can’t stand not touching me.
“I hope you have condoms this time,” I say between kisses.
“Baby, I bought a whole damn box the morning I left you.”
I laugh, breathless, as Danny presses me gently back against the door. “So much for playing it cool.”
He grins, his mouth brushing the corner of mine, teasing but warm. “I’ve been playing it cool for weeks. I’m out of patience, babe.”
“Is that what this is?” I tease, curling my fingers into the collar of his shirt, feeling the heat radiating off him. “Impatience?”
His voice drops, barely more than a breath. “No. This is making up for lost time.”
And then his mouth finds mine. It doesn’t feel rushed. It feels like it’s supposed to happen. I melt into him, my hands fisting his shirt as he walks us back toward my bedroom, kissing me like I’m the only thing keeping him from drifting away.
I break the kiss just long enough to whisper, “You still drive me insane.”
He laughs against my neck, then his mouth is there, biting and teasing. “Good,” he murmurs. “I plan to do it thoroughly.”
We’re tearing our clothes off, and when we get to the bed, I shove him backward onto it and laugh when he flops down on it with exaggerated drama. He grins up at me like I’m his whole damn world. And I honestly believe I could be.
I straddle him, bracing my hands against his chest, and his hands grip my hips.
“You’re beautiful,” he says, and there’s nothing playful in his voice now—just want. “God, Sadie.”
My breath hitches. “Say it again.”
“You’re beautiful. You’re brilliant. And I love you so much it physically hurts sometimes.”
I kiss him before I can fall apart. I just need him close. Every brush of his hand or lips on me feels right, like it’s something I've been missing and now I have it all.
I let him sit up as he slides his boxers down his legs, kicking them off.
He grabs his jeans that are on the floor, searching for his wallet and pulling out a condom.
He rolls it on, and I watch as he strokes himself twice.
I slide back on the bed as he leans over me, grabbing my panties and slipping them off my legs.
He climbs on the bed and hovers above me, entering me slowly and so deep that we both go still, gasping for breath. I press my forehead to his. “This,” I whisper, my breath catching, “is the safest I’ve ever felt.”
His hands slide up my back. “Then I’m doing something right.”
We move together like it’s always been us. There wasn’t a beginning or an end; we’ve just always been Sadie and Danny. He murmurs my name like a promise, and I answer with whispered yeses and Danny, please, and when I look into his eyes, there’s no fear, just home.
He picks up the pace, his hands finding mine and pinning them beside my head.
His hips thrust against mine. He’s so deep, and I feel so much that all I can do is let him give me everything he’s got.
My back arches, and he bends down, biting my nipple before letting it pop from his mouth.
He drives into me frantically, and the orgasm that he pulls from me is nothing I've felt before. My entire body feels like it’s been shocked.
I cry out, and he swallows it, his body locking up as he empties into me.
He falls to the side of me, rolling me with him, still half-hard inside me. I lay against his chest, my cheek pressed to him, listening to his heartbeat. I feel his fingers sliding gently through my hair.
“I think I finally get it,” he says softly.
I smile against his skin. “Get what?”
“What it means to be home.”
I lift my head and look at him. “Me, too,” I whisper.
And for once, I don’t think about the morning, the what-ifs, or the checklist of all the ways it could go wrong. I’m completely at peace with Danny by my side.