Chapter 24 #2
She sighs, I’m sure feeling frustrated that she’s trying to solve this puzzle with one hand tied behind her back. Her phone vibrates in her pocket, and she rises from her chair to take the call. I keep my eyes trained on her as she disappears behind the bar, grabs a coffee, and returns.
As she sits, she deposits the steamy mug beside me before placing her hand on my arm.
The gesture feels too familiar. Like something a girlfriend would do instead of a cocktail server.
I instinctively flinch, withdrawing my arm as if her touch has inflicted second-degree burns.
The lack of sleep combined with my confusion over whatever the hell this is this girl has done to me causes me to become unhinged.
Okay, more unhinged.
“Look,” I snap. “I’m sorry for losing control the last time we were together. I never meant to send mixed signals. I’ve been under a lot of stress.”
She freezes, her hand hovering in the air.
“You’re very attractive, Cassidy. But there’s no place in my life for... this.” I gesture vaguely between us. I’m snippy, defensive, and I hate myself for it.
I don’t want to hurt her. Yet my walls need to go back up and stay there. So I deliver callous words, hoping they’ll prevent me from doing something I shouldn’t. “You’re off duty. I can get what I need.” I take a breath, looking at the hand that was just on my arm. “It’s not like that with us.”
Cassidy’s face turns a shade that rivals her hair. She pulls herself together instantly, her spine straightening. “Yes, Mr. Wilde. I understand.” She turns back to the screen, her focus determined and cold.
I feel like absolute shit. I watch her profile, the way she’s already shutting me out, and the truth slips out before I can stop it. “I’d like to continue to work with you, but this has to remain business only.”
“Yes. You’re right.” Fuck. Why does her agreeing with me feel like a sucker punch?
“Trust me,” I whisper. “It’s for the best. I’m not a good man.”
The terminal screen in front of me is a blur of scrolling text, but I’m not seeing any of it. My fingers hover over the keys, twitching with the urge to do what I do best. Invade her privacy.
I’ve managed to stay out of the chatter rooms tonight, replacing the dark web with projects Loretta deemed next level important.
I decided to work late tonight to get a few of them caught up, while also trying to give myself the reprieve needed to pull my shit together.
Instead, I’ve let my obsession with that forbidden temptress at the club get the best of me.
I could find out everything in under ten minutes.
Does she actually live at the club, or is that beat-up car in the parking lot just a decoy?
Is she married, widowed, or is that kid from the cafe a secret she’s keeping from everyone?
I want to know if the cautious, flinching way she carried herself when she first started has anything to do with those scars.
I’m not an asshole by nature. Even after everything that happened to harden me, I don’t do bad things on a whim. At this point, it’s just a reflex. I’ve spent years using these skills to protect the people I give a damn about. And at times, give true love a chance.
I helped Broadie with Poppy, and look how that turned out.
I don’t know that I’ve ever seen two people more in love.
I’ve kept Luca, Matteo, and Gianni shielded from the reach of their estranged crime family.
Even my old friend Dave from Princeton came to me recently, worried the girl he was seeing was in trouble.
The research is never difficult. And my actions are never nefarious. It’s almost second nature to dive in and find out how I can help. Hell, I even managed to create a video stream so my friends’ loved ones could participate in their wedding.
Yet this feels different. Regardless of how inconvenient it is, I’m developing feelings for her that go way beyond a physical attraction.
It would be wrong to rip her life open without her permission.
I wouldn’t want her doing it to me. I wince at the thought.
As sharp as Cassidy is, she could probably find the cracks in my foundation if I’m not careful.
The door to my office swings open, and Frank strolls in, mid-bite into a large slice of pizza.
“Real professional, Frank,” Loretta quips from her desk.
“I’m delivering data and dinner, Loretta. Multitasking,” Frank retorts, his voice muffled by a mouthful of melted cheese. He drops into the chair across from me and kicks my desk, forcing me to look at him.
“What gives, man? You still look like shit. I haven’t seen you look like this since.
..” He stops. Our eyes connect, and the air leaves the room.
Frank knows. He lived through that awful time with me when Isla vanished from the air like a puff of smoke.
He’s my ride-or-die, the one person who knows exactly why I built these walls.
He lowers his voice. “Have you visited your parents yet?”
“No. I’ll go. Just psyching myself up for it.”
He shakes his head before folding his pizza in half and taking another greasy bite.
“I’m out, Max. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Okay, Loretta. Drive safe.”
“G’night, Mom,” Frank bellows.
Loretta walks away, probably wondering what she ever did to deserve working here.
“Is this just about your parents? I thought you’d finally come to terms with everything.”
My brows pinch as I give my friend a glare. “How does one come to terms with any of it, Frank?”
“No. You’re right. Sorry, man. I just meant you seemed to be handling everything better until recently. Did something happen?”
My head falls back against my chair, and I groan. “I’ve let someone get to me.”
He straightens in his chair. “What do you mean?”
“I’ve allowed myself to get too attracted to Cassidy,” I admit, the words feeling like a confession.
“Cassidy? The hot, pink-haired girl from the club?” Frank quirks a brow.
“Yeah. We’ve been working together. I discovered she’s taking classes on digital forensics,” I say, my voice tight.
“That seems oddly convenient,” Frank says, the shock of the information causing him to lower what’s left of his food.
“Don’t think it hasn’t crossed my mind. I’ve wondered if she’s a plant. Either from a case I’ve hacked, Luca and Matteo’s father, or the Feds.”
Frank knows I cross the line into morally gray on these pro bono cases.
But there’s a massive difference between a lifelong friend standing by my side and a girl who has no idea what she’s walking into.
I dump all of it on him. The questions about her past, the kid, the fear that she’s only fixated on me because of my financial status, or worse, that it’s all real and I’m going to ruin her.
Frank stares at me for a long beat, completely unfazed. “Look, I might not be the cyber genius you are, smart guy, but why don’t you get your answers like the rest of us average Joes?”
I look at him, completely baffled. “What are you talking about?”
“Ask her out,” Frank says, taking another massive bite of his pizza. “On a date. You remember how to do that, right?”