ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝟙𝟡 #2
"In here." His voice drifts from the upstairs. The bedroom.
Dixie would normally call back something sarcastic. Today she doesn't. I simply just follow the sound.
The second Cameron sees me, his expression changes. He was halfway through taking off his department jacket. Now he's staring at me.
"Dix?"
I don't really answer- instead, I walk directly toward him.
His eyebrows furrow. Without second thought, I press my forehead against his chest.
Usually he's the one initiating every hug, every forehead kiss, every ounce of affection. Definitely not me. Slowly, he wraps both muscular arms around me.
Geez, I knew he was a firefighter. Was he really this strong? Or had he been hitting the gym too?
Honestly, I didn't realize how exhausted I was until now. His shirt smells like smoke and laundry detergent. It's comforting, to say the least. It feels like home.
His chin settles on top of my head.
"What happened?" his voice is quiet.
I don't answer him at first.
Honestly, I didn't realize how exhausted I was until now. His shirt smells like smoke and laundry detergent. It's comforting, to say the least. It feels like home.
"What happened?" he asks again.
I groan into his chest.
His arms tighten. "That bad?"
"You know what's funny?"
His eyebrows lift. "Yeah?"
"I got yelled at, threatened with unemployment, and ambushed by the fattest leech in the office."
I finally pull back enough to look at him. He kisses my forehead, gently.
Eventually, I start unloading about everything that happened at the office. It felt nice to get some things off my chest, because I knew he was listening, no matter what.
Cameron sits on the edge of the bed listening while removing his boots.
"I'm so frustrated!" I dig my hands in my hair. Cameron sighs as he gets into bed, propping his head with his arm.
He pats the empty space next to him. "Come here."
I roll my eyes but walk over anyway, sinking into the bed, leaning up against him. His arm immediately wraps around my shoulders.
"I think Ted's worried about you." His words are gentle. Like he's afraid to startle me again.
"I'm fine." I sigh.
"I know."
"No you don't."
He looks down at me. "You're right."
That catches me off guard.
"What?"
"You aren't fine, you're exhausted."
He continues. "You barely sleep, you barely eat, and you've spent weeks carrying this case around by yourself."
Gosh, I hate it sometimes when he's right. He brushes a hand through my curls, separating small pieces.
If there was anything Cameron loved, it would be my hair. The amount of times he told me he wanted his daughter to have the same hair pattern as me was ballistic.
Eventually my head finds his shoulder.
~
Today, she'd been talking for twenty-seven minutes. Of course I counted. Not intentionally, though.
Around minute twelve I realized she still hadn't stopped, and after that it became impressive. She was curled against my side on our bed, ranting about Georgia while I sat against the headboard.
"And another thing."
I smiled. There was always another thing.
"Everyone else in the office thinks she's a sweet angel- she's not. And I'm the bad guy!"
"You can be my angel." I say, chuckling. She glares at me. The glare would've been more intimidating if she wasn't currently using my shoulder as a pillow.
I wasn't complaining though. In fact, I was trying my very hardest not to acknowledge it- because if I did, she'd move. And that's something I wouldn't want.
"I mean seriously, Cameron."
"Dix."
"What?"
"When did you eat lunch?"
I had decided that her lack of food might've been what's causing her so much stress.
Silence. That answered my question.
"Dixie."
"I had coffee."
I close my eyes briefly. "That isn't food."
"Does flavored coffee count?" She replies sarcastically.
Sometimes I worry about her, a lot.
Actually I worry about her most of the time. Or maybe all of the time.
I keep one arm around her shoulders, my thumb moving slowly across her arm, back and forth.
Her talking softened, and her movements were gentle- less sharp. I look down at her, admiring her beauty.
My wife was apparently too exhausted to remember she usually pretended not to enjoy affection. I decided not to remind her.
I lean my head back. The ceiling fan spun lazily overhead.
I swallowed. "Dix."
"Hm?"
My eyes stayed on the ceiling. "You know, March isn't that far away."
She already knew what I meant. Of course she did.
Jordyn.
Her birthday, a couple months away.
I rub her shoulder. I wasn't very sure of where I was going with this conversation- not when it came to Jordyn.
You'd think after years it'd get easier. Spoiler alert: it doesn't. You just get better at carrying it. But the sorrow never goes away.
"Mhm." She finally says.
"We're still going, right?" The question felt stupid the second it left my mouth.
Dixie immediately looked up. I watched as her eyebrows furrowed. "To see her?"
I nod, staring back at her.
"Cameron. We always go."
I smiled slightly. "Yeah."
"Why would we stop?"
"I don't know."
"You think I'm going to forget our daughter's birthday?"
Immediately I shook my head. "No."
"Exactly." She laid her head back down.
A distant memory flies over my head.
"Remmeber when she lost her easter egg candy?" I say.
I can feel Dixie chuckle. "That was tragic."
"Ha. She had spent so much time gathering everything. All the eggs, and stuff."
"Cameron, you were literally crying laughing the entire time."
I laugh quietly. "It was funny."
I stay quiet, ready for her comeback. She didn't say anything.
"Dix?" No response. I look down at her.
The poor girl was fast asleep. At some point during my dramatic retelling of the egg hunt, she'd gave up talking. That was funny. She would never give up talking.
Her face was pressed against my chest. One hand was still curled into my shirt, her breathing slow. She looked peaceful. It was the first time I had seen her completely wind down.
I carefully brush a curl away from her face. "I was getting to the good part, Dixie."
I wrap both arms around her, pulling her closer. She instinctively leaned into me. I press a kiss into her hair then settled lower beneath the blankets until my chin was on top of her head.
Once I clap, the lights turn off. For the first time in forever, sleep came easy.