Chapter Ten
TEN
Aidan
“Wow. You’re really off your game today, big brother.”
Liam weaves around me on the ice, taking the puck with him. I spin around and try to chase after him, but he’s too fast.
He flicks his stick and sinks the puck into the net. He fist-pumps the air.
I stop and hunch over, bracing my free hand on my leg as I catch my breath. “It’s pretty lame how you, a pro hockey player, celebrate scoring against me, not a pro hockey player.”
He laughs. As I straighten back up, he skates past me.
Every week, Liam and I meet up at a rink to play one-on-one and run some other drills. It helps keep me in shape, and he does it as part of his training.
“Come on. One more. You can get it past me this time,” he says.
I wipe the sweat from my brow and groan but square up with him anyway. He drops the puck onto the ice, and I snatch it and skate off. He’s on my ass as I sprint to the net.
I know my little brother is taking it easy on me, but I still want to make this shot.
He starts to close in on me, and I slap the puck with my stick. When it lands at the back of the net, Liam yells.
“Nice! See? I knew you could do it.”
I head to the edge of the rink, grab my water bottle, and chug.
I take a second to catch my breath. “You let me have that one.”
Liam offers a crooked smile and shakes his head. “Nah, man. I was tired. You earned it.”
“Yeah, right.”
“If this were ten years ago and you were still playing college hockey, you would have smoked my ass, no problem.”
“Maybe.”
Just Liam mentioning college hockey makes me think of our dad. How he would lecture me after every game I played and what I did wrong. If he were here, he’d probably chew me out about what I could have done better, how much faster I should have skated, how I could have handled the puck better.
A weird relief pulls at my chest. It makes me even more grateful that I gave this up and focused on teaching. I’m a lot happier playing hockey just for fun.
A tinge of sadness hits me. If only that were good enough for my dad…
He was a hockey dad to the extreme, and I hated it. For most of my life, he felt more like a coach than a father. I remember him saying Good game more often than I love you as a kid. He only ever wanted to talk to me about hockey. He didn’t care if I was interested in other hobbies. Whenever I tried to talk about anything else, he would half pay attention or tell me that I should focus more on playing better. All that mattered to him was for me to be a hockey star.
I glance at Liam and wait for him to mention our dad, but he doesn’t.
Liam’s still on good terms with him and sees him regularly, which is fine. I don’t want my brother to cut things off with him just because I have. But I don’t want to listen to him tell me for the millionth time that I should be the bigger person and try to fix things with our dad. He just doesn’t get it. Our dad’s always been happy with Liam since he made hockey his whole life. He doesn’t know what it’s like to be the one that our dad will forever be disappointed in.
Thankfully, other than that, the issues I have with our dad haven’t affected our relationship as brothers. We bicker and get on each other’s nerves, like all brothers do, but we care about each other and genuinely get along.
We head to one of the benches outside of the rink and unlace our skates.
Liam looks over at me. “Seriously though. You’ve been quieter than normal today. Everything okay?”
I huff out a breath and think about that disaster meeting with Micah in my office yesterday morning. How it all started when I looked up and saw her boobs just inches from my face…
How I stared at her for way, way too long…
Shame flashes through me.
She was right when she called me a creep. That was unquestionably wrong of me to stare at her chest.
But honestly? I wasn’t lying when I said that I couldn’t help it. It was like my brain had gone offline. Micah has the most incredible pair of breasts I’ve ever seen.
Even now I can picture them perfectly, spilling out of that sexy-as-hell black lace bra…
I press my eyes shut and shake my head.
For fuck’s sake, Aidan. Can you stop picturing her boobs?
A sinking feeling hits me. I think about how angry and upset Micah was when she caught me looking at her. As much as I don’t like her, it’s still messed up what I did. Yeah, it was an accident, and I truly didn’t mean to stare at her chest like that, but that doesn’t make it okay.
I was still a jerk with how I reacted. I should have just apologized and let her lash out at me instead of getting so defensive.
“Work stuff has just been kind of stressful,” I finally say.
Liam offers a sympathetic look. “Sorry, man.”
I shrug. “It is what it is.”
We start to throw our gear into our bags.
“Is it that hot auditor again?”
When I see my brother smirking at me, I roll my eyes.
“Oh damn, it is.” He laughs. “What’d she do this time?”
I hesitate for a second. “It wasn’t her. It was me,” I mutter.
“What do you mean?”
I hesitate again, debating whether I should even tell him this. He’s going give me endless shit for it. But honestly? I deserve it. I deserve to get shit on for how I handled things yesterday.
I run a hand through my sweaty hair. “So, uh, she came to my office yesterday, and when I looked up at her, I noticed her shirt was unbuttoned.”
Liam’s eyes go wide. “Seriously?”
I nod.
“You saw her boobs?”
“She was wearing a bra, but…yeah, I could see, um, a lot.”
He blinks. A second later, he starts to smile. “She’s got a nice rack, huh?”
I shove him. “Could you for once not act like a hard-up frat boy?”
He holds up a hand. “Okay, I’m sorry.”
I let out a breath. “I couldn’t help but stare at her. She got upset, and we argued. It was pretty fucking awkward and uncomfortable.”
Liam’s quiet as we finish packing up. We stand up and head to the entrance of the rink.
“So what are you gonna do?” he asks.
“Nothing. She said she didn’t want to talk about it again.”
“Then why are you so bothered by this?”
I stop walking and look at him. “Seriously? You don’t understand why I’m a little thrown off after what went down between Micah and me?”
“You said yourself she wants you two to forget it. But here you are, still talking about it.”
I’m quiet for a second. My dumbass little brother has a point.
“Maybe that means something,” Liam says.
“Like what?”
He grins. “Maybe you’re into her.”
I frown at my brother. “I mean, yeah, she’s attractive. But she doesn’t even like me. Just like I don’t like her.”
Still grinning, my brother shakes his head like he doesn’t believe me. “Like has nothing to do with attraction, Aidan. Do you how many times I’ve had hate sex? It’s fucking hot.”
I laugh, astounded by my brother’s brashness. “You can’t be serious.”
“I’m dead serious. You don’t have to like someone to have a good time in bed with them. Sometimes that fire and tension from hating each other is all you need.”
I roll my eyes.
He pats my shoulder. “Think about it.”
“You’re out of your mind,” I say as we walk out of the rink and into the parking lot.
But, annoyingly, my brother’s words stick in my head.
I never thought I’d be into that sort of thing. With every woman I’ve dated, we liked each other right off the bat. Before meeting Micah, I never thought I could even be attracted to someone I despised.
Sometimes that fire and tension from hating each other is all you need.
I catch myself wondering if that’s true.