Chapter Twenty #3
Justin narrowed his eyes as Cordelia kept her hand over his mouth.
Gripping her wrist gently, he pulled her fingers away from his lips.
“All right, fine, but semantics aside, I’d like you to consider me.
I am independently wealthy, I own property in London, and my father left me a small amount of money to purchase a proper house. ”
“What about making improvements to Hollyhead?” she asked.
Justin sat up, dislodging her from the side of his body.
He pulled his trousers on in a brusque manner.
Cordelia’s head was spinning. She had grown fond of him…
and perhaps more so. But it was too dangerous to name at the moment.
Marrying Justin would mean giving up the one life she’d known and loved. What would her sisters think?
“Justin, I—”
“You know,” he said, suddenly aloof, “your Hollyhead might be the one, true love in your life, but for me it was a living hell.”
Cordelia’s mouth dropped open. “I’m n-not sure I understand,” she said.
“Living here I was either hungry or aching from my father’s beatings, or both.
The only relief I had was Alice, who looked after me.
My father was training me up for using the forge from the time I was five years old,” he said.
He smiled ruefully. “The only thing worse than being choked by the soot was being punished for doing something wrong. And let me tell you, he did not spare the punishments.”
Cordelia felt her eyes burn with unshed tears. “Oh, Justin,” she whispered, reaching a hand out to him. He shrugged it away.
“I don’t need your sympathy. In fact, I feel humiliated to be even telling you this. Everywhere I walk on these grounds, I am reminded of my father,” he said.
Cordelia remained silent, watching him. He hung his head, placing his elbows on his knees. “I know that you love this place and you would do anything to keep it. But it was no such sanctuary for me.”
With that, he stood. He reached for his white shirt, throwing it over his body in haste, as though he needed to put something on that would protect him.
“I suggest you get yourself dressed,” he said, not bothering to look at her. “I’ll wait for you outside. We’ve tarried here too long. I’ll tell them we took shelter at the Collinses’, so no one suspects anything.”
When the door slammed behind him, the entire vicarage was thick with his absence.
She hadn’t realized the sun had finally broken through the clouds and was shining rosy light through the windows.
Feeling chilled, Cordelia found her shift and let it slide over her body.
It was still damp and clung to her limbs; her skin was sensitive after the lovemaking.
Now that her mind had been let out of the cage she’d put it in earlier, it was rabid with its judgments. They flitted through her brain like flies on the surface of a pond. How could you do this? What were you thinking? You are wrong for each other! Why don’t you have any self-control?
Bracing herself against the mantel of the fireplace she let out a shaky breath.
Reaching around the back of her dress, she finished buttoning her clothing, feeling absolutely deflated.
She promised herself five years ago that she would wait for Rhys to return.
He’d promised her that he would do right by her, that they were practically engaged anyway.
Twisting her hair in a bun, she bit her lip, more confused than ever. She heard a soft knock at the door. Justin opened it, enough to let the light spill in. “Are you ready?” he asked, and his voice sounded strained.
“Yes,” she replied.
“Your ankle?”
“Still aching, but I’ll be able to make it home.”
He nodded and stood out of the way as she passed him through the threshold.
They walked side by side through the sopping grass.
Hollyhead was standing proudly, like an old dowager, ahead of them.
The late sun was burning off the mist, giving their surroundings an ethereal feel.
Cordelia should have been walking on air, but instead she felt every inch of her mortality, from her ankle to her smarting ribcage, to the soreness between her legs.
Justin was silent and stoic beside her as she leaned on his outstretched arm, acting the perfect gentleman.
Had they even known each other? He was behaving so coldly that Cordelia could not summon the worry she would have otherwise felt.
There was no way anyone would suspect them, if he continued this behavior at least.
“Oh! I see them!”
Bea was the first of the small company, who were huddled under the awning at the stable yard. Her youngest sister ran up to them, getting the hem of her dress wet. She was smiling, but Cordelia could see red splotches under her eyes.
“I thought you were dead!” she shouted, wrapping Cordelia in a tight hug.
“Don’t be silly!” Cordelia replied, gasping at the shock of pain from the embrace. “Bea… could you not hold on quite so tightly?”
Portia was next, her arm at her side in a sling.
“We were all so worried about you!” she said, allowing Cordelia to lean on her other good shoulder.
Between Justin, Portia, and Bea, she was practically carried back to Hollyhead.
She should have been relieved to see everyone, but instead she felt as though a tight cord that had been coiled in her chest had snapped.
Tears began running down her cheeks as they made it onto the flagstones of the stable yard.
“Oh, poor dear!”
It was the last voice she wanted to hear. Lady Billings was standing with her cane clutched in her hand. “I heard the doctor had been discharged to Hollyhead, and of course, I thought I should come over forthwith to see to your health!”
“T-thank you,” Cordelia blubbered out. Justin pressed a handkerchief in her hand. It smelled of leather and soap. She wiped her eyes and nose, happy to have something to do.
“I sent Rhys out looking for you, but by the time he arrived, he saw the rubble had been moved!” Lady Billings chirped on.
“You can imagine how worried we were! Why, the Rothesay dukedom has already lost two of its lords this year alone! God forbid something happened again. Good heavens, what would we do?’
There was only one word Cordelia heard out of that entire sentence. “Rhys?”
“Yes, my dear!” Lady Billings replied, harrumphing. “Shall I ask Mrs. Norris to make us all a cup of tea? Of course, you both must change first, you’re positively slovenly, dears.”
“Rhys is back? In Hertfordshire?” Cordelia asked. She was starting to feel lightheaded again. She leaned heavier against Portia, who grunted in response.
“Yes, my dear! Haven’t I been saying as much?”
“But what about…” Cordelia stopped herself from saying the Italian mistress.
“Why don’t you say hello to him yourself?” Bea jumped in, gesturing to the doorway.
The entire group turned to see him leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed against his chest. The man was so handsome he could have been carved from stone.
His golden hair was too long and he was in need of a shave, but one flash of that brilliant smile and anyone could have forgiven him for his scruffy appearance.
“Rhys,” she said.
“Lia,” he replied, pushing off the doorframe and offering her a curt bow.
Cordelia’s heart pounded as she felt Justin tense beside her.
At this very moment she wished she had the capacity to faint on command.
A gasp from Lady Billings was enough to end the moment.
She pointed to the handkerchief that was pressed to Cordelia’s nose.
Pulling it off her skin, Cordelia saw that it was blooming with blood.
“Oh dear,” she murmured to herself.