Chapter 29
Petey
The rest of the night was a blur. The show’s medics had been performing CPR and given Indira a couple of shocks with the defibrillator, but she was unconscious when the ambulance arrived.
It did not look good. I’m not a doctor, I’m a TV producer, so I did the one thing I was qualified to do—I stepped up and took charge.
I’d have been terrified, but there wasn’t time to think.
I was running on adrenaline all night. Though there were dark clouds over the production and no one really felt like celebrating, we filmed the Farewell Ball as planned.
One last flash of colourful silk gowns and spectacular waistcoats—under disco lights in Buckford’s Great Hall.
An eight-piece string orchestra backed Dorinda as she sang Beyoncé’s “Love on Top”—a track she’d also recorded in the studio so we could play it seamlessly over the closing images.
Those images were a sequence Indira called “Carriages at Midnight.” Cast members would walk down the front steps of the house to Buckford Hall’s carriage court one last time.
They would bow and curtsey to Jonty and Lola, then climb into the waiting carriages, and we’d film them waving goodbye as they disappeared up the drive.
The final shot would be Lola and Jonty walking back into Buckford Hall, arm in arm, as if it were their home.
At the end of the drive, the cast found an ugly white marquee, where they could get changed back into their twenty-first-century clothes, then pile into a fleet of black Range Rovers to be taken to the Travelodge in Leicester, where they’d spend tomorrow with the aftercare team.
But first, in the function room in the Travelodge, the party would continue—this time for the crew as well as the cast.
It was late when I was finally ready to leave Buckford Hall.
I showered to wash away a truly awful day and gathered up my things from the folly.
William was nowhere to be seen. I assumed he’d gone to the party in town.
I checked the belvedere for any stray belongings and found myself burying my face in William’s sheets, desperate for the smell of him.
I’d been so angry with him that I’d made my last few days here a misery.
But seeing Indira face mortality like that…
I’d started to think about what was important.
I went downstairs and sat at William’s desk one last time and scribbled him a farewell note.
The party was in full swing by the time I checked into the Travelodge.
There was two grand behind the bar, and everyone had clearly decided not to let it go to waste.
It was getting rowdy. I didn’t much feel like being there, but I had to show my face.
The crew was all there. Bunny Winters was dancing with Hassan.
Bramley was taking part in a limbo competition. William was nowhere to be seen.
“Petey Boy!” Jonty’s unmistakable voice cut through the hubbub. “Looking for someone?”
“Nope.”
He looked like he didn’t believe me. “Any news on Indira?”
I shook my head. “She’s in surgery now. Her sister’s coming up from London. I don’t expect to hear anything until tomorrow.”
There was a terrible screeching sound, like someone was trying to tie two foxes into a knot.
“What is that… noise?”
“It’s Lola!” Jonty said, face beaming. “Turns out she’s obsessed with karaoke. Isn’t she marvellous?”
“That’s certainly one word for it.”
Love was not only blind but clinically deaf, apparently. As I was about to stand upright to give my back a rest—the curse of tall people everywhere—Jonty looped an arm around my neck and pulled me down to eye level.
“I’m going to marry her, Petey Boy. For real this time. She’s everything. I mean, have you seen those ears? She’s the piece of me that’s always been missing. I can’t thank you enough for bringing us together.”
I was thrilled for him, obviously, but very nervous for society as a whole.
“I hope you’ll be very happy together,” I said. “I’m sure you’ll have a very happy, very… loud… life together.”
“And I plan to fill her with a lot of very loud children.”
“What a vivid way to say that, Jonty. Thank you for that image.”
He laughed like a donkey being fed into a meat grinder, and I got a very good look at a couple of fillings.
“And what about you?”
“What about me?”
“Are you going to marry that prime aristocratic beef you’re definitely not searching the crowd for right now?”
I frowned at him.
“You know the engagement was fake.”
“I know,” he said, pulling me closer still. “The engagement was fake, but the feelings aren’t. I’ve seen the way you look at each other.”
A screech pierced through the speakers, followed by a wail of feedback.
“Are you seriously going to tell me you’re not going to give it a shot with old Dub-Dub?”
I shrugged. I wanted this conversation to be over—and not only because Jonty’s breath smelt like a rubbish bin at a dog park on a hot summer’s afternoon.
“We’re not even talking to each other at the moment. I just want to go back to London, hug my gran, and see the boys. I don’t know what impression you’ve got or why it’s any of your business, Jonty, but their ain’t anything going on between me and Lord Buckford.”
“I think you’re wrong.”
“Pardon.”
“I think you’re scared.”
“I grew up in the East End. Nothing scares me, bruv.”
“This scares you, bruv.”
“Are you mocking me?”
“Not at all. It’s been a while since I’ve heard you speak like that. That’s all.”
“What are you saying?”
Jonty’s mouth was back at my ear. “Listen, I know you. I’ve been on plenty of nights out with you and Ludo and the boys. You’re the leader. The organiser. The group’s fixer. Never an outward sign of weakness. But you don’t feel in control of your feelings for Dub-Dub, and it scares you.”
“Oh, piss off, Jonty.” I jerked myself free of him.
“OK. But I’ll say this—”
“You’ve said enough.” I was ready to break the world record for throwing a posh twat across a bar.
“He deserves a shot.” Jonty squared up, his eyes intense.
“I’ve known Dub-Dub since we were thirteen.
We’ve been through some shit together, man and boy, but one thing’s always been true.
If he loves you—whether you’re a friend, family, a horse—he gives you his all. I think you need someone like that.”
Jonty mussed his hands through my hair.
“And you deserve someone like that.” He disappeared across the dance floor towards the stage, and I watched as Lola jumped down into his arms. They spun around, their faces in raptures, like they were the only two people in the venue.
That was about all I could handle. I went up to my room to pass out until morning.