Chapter 8 The Bookshelf #2
Felix sucked in a sharp breath, clutching at his chest dramatically, slumping back into the pouf like a Victorian child with a fainting couch. “How can you say that?”
Zane put his arm around Felix, pulling him into a hug.
Felix immediately melted into it, chin tucking under Zane’s jaw, fingers curling into the front of his sweater.
“It’s just that you don’t get many chances to practice and that’s okay.
You have us to drive you anywhere you need to go. And we love you.”
“Even if you are the worst driver we’ve ever seen,” Avi said, beaming at him like it was an accomplishment.
He said it with genuine fondness, like Felix’s terrible driving was just another charming quirk to collect.
For Avi, it was. Felix was perfect in his eyes. No matter how many cars he’d wrecked.
“Wow,” Felix said, glowering at them. His ears were pink now, whether from embarrassment or the mulled wine, it was hard to tell.
“Felix,” Asa said, his tone matter-of-fact.
“I’ve seen blind people who drive better than you.
It is what it is. You’ve got lots of other things going for you.
You’re talented, smart, funny—though usually unintentionally—and you’re a total smokeshow.
Nobody cares that you’re the literal worst driver we’ve ever known. ”
“You guys should stop helping,” Zane said. He rubbed Felix’s arm soothingly, thumb tracing slow circles over his soft skin.
“What were we even talking about?” Felix mumbled, taking another sip of his drink. The mug clinked softly against his teeth.
“The roads. We were talking about the roads,” Avi said.
“Yeah,” Asa said. “It’s odd. It’s like they were built around the houses and the houses were built around…something else.”
“Isn’t there a community garden in the center of the old neighborhood?” Zane asked. “Isn’t that what Adam’s geriatric besties are always beefing over?”
Asa nodded. “Yeah, but it’s more like the community garden was built to cover up something in a space that already existed.
It wasn’t part of the urban landscape. The neighborhood wasn’t designed to be self-sustaining, it’s not like an eco-build.
And houses in developments like this usually plot the land, build the roads, then start building.
This is like they built the houses, then just created the roads to accommodate them. ”
He ran a hand through his hair, frustration bleeding through the academic explanation.
“Huh,” Felix said. “That does seem kind of strange.” He shifted closer, knees brushing Zane’s thigh, unconsciously seeking contact as the conversation drifted toward unsettling.
“Yeah, and it gets weirder,” Asa said. “Adam said that every single basement on that side of the development looks identical.”
Zane frowned. “Why is that weird? Don’t most of these developments have the same builder?”
Asa nodded, but still looked disturbed. “He said they aren’t similar. They’re identical. Same depth, same square footage, same central layout. He said you can’t tell one basement from the other. He called it disorienting. Said he thinks they all connect somehow.”
The room went quiet for half a beat, the fire crackling louder in the pause.
“Connect? Like underground tunnels?” Felix asked, leaning forward a little, like he was hoping for some good gossip. His eyes were bright now, curiosity overriding his earlier indignation.
Avi scoffed. “Noah is right. This place does make people crazy. I’ve never heard of an architectural conspiracy.” He flopped onto his back on the floor beside the abandoned pile of wood-like pieces, staring at the ceiling.
Asa rolled his eyes. “Look, I’m telling you, it’s weird. This whole place is fucking weird.”
Zane bit back a smile as he asked, “Are you implying that there’s some secret geriatric cabal building underground tunnels…for what?” He tightened his arm around Felix instinctively, playfully, like he was cowering at the ridiculous notion.
Felix’s eyes sparkled as he suggested, “Worshipping Satan?”
“Aren’t they a little old to be devil worshippers?” Avi asked. “Do you age out of that, or…?”
Felix shrugged. “Never too old for hobbies.”
Zane shrugged. “Weren’t all the devil worshippers old in Rosemary’s Baby? Maybe the real mystery is why so many old people turn to Satanism after retirement. Maybe you don’t age out, you age in? Is that a thing?”
“So does this mean Adam’s murder plot could be connected to the community garden and the community garden is run by devil worshippers? All of whom are connected by underground tunnels?” Avi asked, grinning.
He looked delighted by the idea, like he’d just unlocked a secret bonus level.
Asa rolled his eyes. “Don’t believe me. I don’t care. But I’m telling you, this neighborhood—and these people—are fucking hiding something.”
He jabbed a finger at the half-assembled shelf like it was personally responsible for the mystery.
“Boy, the paranoia catches on fast here,” Zane said. “Maybe there’s hallucinogenics in the water supply?”
Felix shrugged. “I definitely didn’t hallucinate the Prince shrine. And Noah said that the neighbors went caroling—”
“Caroling? Like the singing in unison on people’s doorsteps? People do that in real life?” Avi asked, seeming genuinely shocked.
“Yeah, I guess so,” Felix said. “I mean, they didn’t in my neighborhood but large crowds gathering outside anyone’s door on that side of town was likely to be met with deadly force.”
“Even if they were singing Christmas songs?” Zane asked.
“Especially then,” Felix said.
He shuddered dramatically, burrowing deeper into Zane’s chest.
Avi had a kind of befuddled look on his face when he said, “Who created caroling in the first place? And…why? Singing in unison is weird.”
“Cults love singing,” Zane offered mildly, just putting it out there.
“Yeah, Noah said they weren’t going door to door, just standing on people’s sidewalks and singing old-timey Christmas songs in a weird monotone voice,” Felix said with a shiver. “Like…too synchronized.”
“Maybe they’re just bad singers?” Asa asked.
Felix shrugged. “Noah said it felt more like a…ritual.”
“So we’ve come full circle back to devil worshippers? Or do we suspect witches? I thought witches had rebranded and were now all like woosah and carrying crystals in their bras or whatever?” Avi said.
He mimed jingling something imaginary, probably boobs. Avi loved boobs. Most men did. Even the ones who didn’t like the women attached to them. It was a strange phenomenon that Zane thought should be studied by scientists.
Felix rolled his eyes. “I’m fairly certain there’s more to witchcraft than that.”
“I’m starting to long for the days when Adam just suspected old people murdering each other over flowers and not that we might be living on a hellmouth,” Zane joked.
He pressed a kiss into Felix’s hair, inhaling the faint scent of cinnamon and wine. He couldn’t help himself. The more the alcohol warmed him, the more his hands roamed and the closer Felix got. If he could have purred like a cat, he would.
“We have to leave soon,” Zane reminded Asa, staring pointedly at what would—theoretically—one day be a usable bookshelf. The tree lights reflected faintly in his glasses, making him look softer than usual.
Asa huffed out a noise of frustration, then snatched the booklet full of pictures and directions, glaring down at it like he could intimidate it into snapping together like magic furniture out of a children’s movie.
He narrowed his eyes, muttering under his breath in what Zane recognized as Asa’s ‘deeply offended by inanimate objects’ voice.
For ten whole minutes, Asa built the furniture without issue before his face once more formed a scowl. The only sounds were the soft clink of metal, the fire popping, and Felix and Zane’s lips meeting and parting as they kissed softly.
“Attach panel B to panel GG,” Asa said out loud, scanning the pieces of wood scattered about. “There is no GG. There’s no GG! Are these people just fucking with me?”
“You think you can get this done before we’re due at dad’s house?” Avi asked, toeing at a piece of wood on the ground. He nudged it gently, like it might bite.
“Think you can get it done before the real piece shows up from Italy in three months?” Felix snarked.
Asa growled at Felix, baring his teeth. Felix blew him a kiss.
Zane laughed softly, catching Felix’s eye.
There was something warm and familiar in that look — shared history, shared exhaustion, shared love.
When he leaned in, Zane did too, their lips connecting once more in a kiss that lingered, before Felix settled his head on Zane’s chest. He wrapped both arms around him without thinking, weirdly grateful to be warm and cozy as the storm howled outside.
For a moment, the weird neighborhood, the unfinished shelf, and their turncoat toddlers faded into the background.
“Should I start filming?” Avi suggested, voice positively salacious.
Zane and Felix separated with a longing sigh.
“Fuck it, I’m just gonna chuck this in the trash. It’s clearly defective,” Asa sulked.
Before Zane could respond, his phone rang. He frowned. “Lucas? Did we get the time wrong or something?”
“You’d know if you answered the phone, Lois,” Asa said, still glaring at the wood pile.
“Don’t take that tone with me, Asa Mulvaney,” Zane snapped, sliding to answer his phone even as he shot his husband a warning look. “Hey, what’s—”
Lucas cut him off. “Cricket’s in labor.”
“What? I mean, cool. She’s overdue,” Zane said, confused. “Isn’t that how babies usually get here?”
Lucas huffed in annoyance. “No, she’s in labor and driving to the mansion.”
“Again, was that not the plan?” Zane said, shaking his head, giving the others a look even though they could only hear his side of the conversation.
“She’s driving herself!” Lucas shouted into his ear.
Adrenaline shot through Zane’s whole body. “Oh, fuck. Okay, shit. Uh, okay. We’ll get dressed and head to the mansion.”
“Dressed?” Lucas yelped, before saying, “Why are you—You know what? Not the time. Just please get there as soon as you can. I need all hands on deck for this.”
Zane nodded even though Lucas couldn’t see him. “I’m sure she’s already there or almost. It will be fine. Totally fine. It’s all gonna be fine.”
Even if there was a storm raging outside and a pregnant woman in active labor driving herself to the hospital. Totally fine. All good. Fucking hell. This was so not like her, yet somehow also entirely like her. Too independent, trying to do it all on her own.
Zane disconnected the call.
“Looks like the bookshelf will have to wait until after Christmas. Cricket is in labor and apparently driving herself to Dad’s.”
“Oh, no, we can’t build the bookshelf,” Felix said in the same monotone voice Zane imagined the carolers singing in. “That’s terrible.”
“I didn’t see you building anything, smart mouth,” Asa said.
“You loved this mouth well enough last night,” Felix shot back.
“I love your mouth all the time,” Zane said, kissing him again.
“Suck up,” Asa mumbled.
They ignored him. Felix pulling back to say, “Aw, I love yours too.”
“Not to interrupt the mutual love fest but shouldn’t you two put some clothes on?” Avi asked, glancing at his watch. “Its cold as fuck outside and you’re both naked.”
“Yeah, yeah. Fine.”
The room shifted then, their bubble breaking like glass. The fire still crackled, the lights still twinkled, but the moment had passed. Something bigger now taking its place.
Zane stood, tugging Felix up with him, hoping they’d unpacked enough to have something comfortable but appropriate for Dad’s Christmas eve plans. Though, he imagined dinner was canceled.
By the time they were dressed and presentable, Asa and Avi were waiting at the front door, already reaching for coats, for keys.
Behind them, the unfinished bookshelf sat in pieces on the floor—forgotten, unimportant.
Family came first.
Always.