Chapter 1
One
DARCIE
Lennox kept her eyes on me, her hand tight in mine as I shared my story. Her face was pained, a tear trickling down her cheek every now and then. She didn’t interrupt, letting me get out every detail of my sordid past. With one last breath, I heaved a sigh, my tale coming to a close.
“So, I got into the car and drove. I’m sorry to bring you into this mess, but I didn’t know what else to do.”
The tears I’d been able to hold back threatened to spill now that I was done. I felt a little lighter, having shared my burden, but my heart was heavy from the emotional toil. I sagged into the couch, too afraid to look at the others.
“Darcie, never apologize for needing a friend. I’m glad you came.”
Lennox hugged me, her arms feeling like healing beacons of warmth as she wrapped them around me. The last bit of my restraint broke, my sobs pouring out of me. My body shook with the force of my tears, and I let it all go.
I cried for the girl who hadn’t been home in years, whose family had been taken away. I wept for the girl whose first love had to leave her and the hole he left in his wake. And I sobbed for the life I’d finally created for myself and how that was now gone as well.
Nothing in my life ever remained, and I was sick of losing.
That thought sobered me, the tears beginning to dry as I found the strength I’d built begin to return.
I drew back, wiping my eyes, surprised to find a box of tissues in front of my face. Glancing up, I spotted Simon holding them out to me.
“Thank you,” I sniffled, taking the box and pulling a few free to wipe my eyes and blow my nose. It wasn’t a pretty task, but I felt better once it was done.
“We should tell my dad,” Lennox said, nodding to herself.
“I’m not sure that’s the right call in this situation, Peach,” Slade said from behind me. I turned, taking in his tense posture against the wall.
Lennox slumped, her shoulders dropping at his words. “I… I’m not sure what to do then. Especially with…” she trailed off, her eyes staying on her hands as she twisted in her lap.
“What is it, Len?” I asked, worried I’d dumped too much on her plate.
She looked up, her face changing as she made up her mind about something. “It’s nothing. You can stay here as long as you need to, Darcie. I’ll help you, however I can.”
“Peach,” Slade growled, but she ignored him, some of her fire returning.
“What isn’t she telling me?” I asked the guys, glancing around. Slade was busy staring down Lennox, who avoided his gaze. Simon wore a sheepish grin but didn’t say anything. It was Thane who filled me in when I met his eyes.
“She got asked to go on tour with Shadows of Mayhem. We leave in the morning.”
“Shut up! That’s amazing, Len!” I shouted, reaching over to hug her. She tensed but accepted my embrace.
Through my happiness for her, I finally understood what was going on.
“You have to go,” I said, drawing back. “This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.”
“There will be others. Plus, you need me. I’m your friend, and I’m choosing to help you instead.”
I smiled at her, loving this girl in front of me even more. She truly was one of a kind.
“And that’s exactly why I can’t let you pass on this opportunity. You’re amazing, Lennox, and everyone deserves to know that. If I can just stay here tonight, I’ll figure something out. You don’t need to reroute your life for me.”
She started to protest when Slade spoke up, her mouth closing.
“I might have another solution to offer,” he said, his deep voice brokering no arguments.
“You could come with us!” Lennox yelled, a smile spreading across her face.
The thought of being stuck in a vehicle with my bestie and her three boyfriends sounded as appealing as a bikini wax. I grimaced, hoping that wasn’t what Slade had in mind.
“Um,” I hedged, turning to him, urging him to tell me something different.
He was watching Lennox, a soft smile on his face for her. When he turned to me, the softness was gone, and the no-nonsense man I’d come to know had returned.
“As fun as that would be,” he started, making my heart race; he was going to agree with her, “it wouldn’t be the wisest or safest option for either of you. Plus, I doubt your bestie wants to be there for our after-concert celebrations.”
Lennox’s face heated, and she squirmed in her seat. “Okay, what’s this brilliant plan then?” she asked, crossing her arms in a defensive pose. I saw through it, though, and knew it was more likely she was turned on and didn’t want me to know.
“Bubba,” Slade said, not giving any other explanation.
Lennox’s face lit up at the name, her eyes sweeping back and forth as she thought about it. Her smile widened as she nodded.
“Oh, yes. That’s perfect. Bubba will know how to protect you. He’s part of your world.”
“My world?” I asked, lifting my eyebrow incredulously. I’d met the man once and didn’t know how the oversized teddy bear was supposed to protect me.
“He’s the leader of the Brotherhood.”
She said it like I should know it, but I’d never heard of the Brotherhood before. I shook my head, not understanding what she was trying to tell me.
“He’s a biker, but it’s not like you’re thinking,” Slade said, eying Lennox. “His club isn’t what you’re used to. But Lennox is right that he knows your world. He’s the best one I can think of to protect you. I’d trust Lennox with him,” he added, letting me know how much he thought of this man.
“I don’t know. Maybe I should just keep going in the morning. I need to check on someone anyway,” I mumbled. The thought of putting my faith in a strange man’s hands I’d met once felt scary. Especially if he was a biker. I wasn’t sure I trusted anyone in that world outside of Maddox.
Thinking of him brought a pang of sadness, the tears threatening to spill again. I missed him. I needed him. And he wasn’t here. Again.
I prayed what Chase said was true, despite the fact that it meant Maddox was in jail. The thought of him purposefully staying away hurt too much. The message Chase wanted me to give him roared to the surface, and I knew I needed to find him. I needed to make sure his sister was safe. Maddox would want that. It gave me something other than myself to focus on too.
“If you won’t stay with Bubba, I won’t go on my tour. It’s as simple as that, Darce,” Lennox said.
“What?” I practically shouted, my heart beginning to race. “That’s not fair. He’s practically a stranger!”
“You asked us for help, and this is us helping. If you trust me, then trust that I wouldn’t put you in more danger. I promise. This could be the perfect place for you to hide and lie low. No one will expect it. I’ll be on the road, creating some distance as well. You won’t be safe anywhere else, and you know it.”
She had a point, but I didn’t want to admit it. Staying with someone new would keep me more hidden, especially if she was out on tour. If no one was after me, I would have the time I needed to develop a plan. Their idea had the potential to keep us both safe. Plus, I knew Slade would never jeopardize Lennox’s safety after the incident with the stalker, so I had to take his word that this guy was okay.
Sighing, I dropped my head, nodding. I didn’t have it in me to say the words.
“Let’s get you cleaned up and into bed. It’s been a long night. In the morning, we’ll talk with Bubba. It’s going to be okay, Darce,” Lennox soothed, taking my hands and pulling me from the couch.
I didn’t know if I believed her words, but I wanted to trust her. It was hard to have faith in good things when everything was falling apart.
She ushered me into a shower, turned on the water, and showed me where Simon kept his best products. When the steam billowed out of the curtain, she hugged me tight and kissed my cheek, saying she’d be back later to check on me.
Nodding, I stripped out of my clothes and numbly stepped into the water. I felt it hit my skin, but outside of the pressure, I was unaware of my surroundings. My brain was officially going offline, having dealt with too much already. Now that I was relatively safe, the fight-or-flight part was deactivating, leaving me a numbed-out mess.
Going through the familiar motions, I washed my body. When I spotted a hint of red in the water around my feet, my memories surged up, and I remembered what brought me here.
Chase.
I’d killed him.
Or at least I thought I had. It was all a blur at the end as my need to get out of there surged through me.
The feel of the knife as I shoved it into him and the slipperiness of the blood were all I could focus on. Everything else was a haze as I tried to recall if he had a heartbeat or seemed coherent when I left.
I didn’t know if I wished him dead or alive. Both had a series of consequences attached to them. Neither were things I could solve at this moment.
Scrubbing harder, I made sure to erase every ounce of blood from me. Once my skin was red and raw, I felt better, knowing that nothing of him remained on me.
I’d need to burn my clothes and scrub down my car just to be sure. It was the last bit of evidence tying me to the crime.
Washing my hair was significantly easier, the smell of Simon’s products enough to keep my focus as I lathered and rinsed. When I climbed out, I spotted my bag, sending a silent thanks to Lennox for bringing it in.
Dressing into something clean and soft helped put the rest of my body at ease as I retraced the steps I’d taken to get here.
I’d been careful, avoided all cameras and took the back roads. I had to trust I was safe for now.
Brushing my wet hair in the mirror, I assessed myself. My face was blank, all emotion drained away from me. My eyes were dark, the spark having been stolen. I didn’t like being this girl. I didn’t want to go back.
Taking a deep breath, I forced myself to embrace my emotions, knowing if I ran from them this time, I’d never come back.
When I was satisfied with what I saw in the mirror, I gathered my stuff, careful not to touch any of the blood on the clothes.
Lennox was waiting for me outside the door when I exited.
“Hey, how do you feel?” she asked. Her eyes washed over me, taking me in, almost like she was verifying I really wasn’t hurt.
“Better. Is there somewhere I can burn these?” I asked, lifting the pile of things I’d been wearing.
Her eyes dropped to the wad of clothes, her head nodding before she looked up. “I know the perfect place.”
She led me out back, tugging my hand as she stepped off the porch into a big backyard. Motion-sensor lights flashed on as we walked toward a brick circle a few yards from the house. When we neared, I realized it was a firepit.
“This work?” she asked, stopping to look at me.
“Yep.” Tossing the clothes into the circle, I looked around for something to light them with.
“Here,” Thane said from behind. I jumped a little but took the lighter fuel and matches he offered.
Squeezing some over the clothes, I stepped back as I thought about my next move.
“Here’s to never looking back,” I said, striking a match and tossing it into the pit.
Flames flew up, warming my cheeks, and I knew I meant that creed with everything in me.