Diary # 7

Diary # 7

Dear Mom,

We made it to Jackson. It’s not the same place I left. Knowing that kills me, but it’s not my fault, so it’s no use holding onto misplaced guilt.

I’m going to meet Dad soon. Is it weird I’m a little nervous? Dad has always been this bigger-than-life entity. I believed he could do no wrong and always made the right choice. Seeing the state of the town and hearing about the club shatters this image I had of him. Maybe the version I had never existed, but losing it is just as hard.

Once I see him again, the illusion I’ve held on to will be destroyed, and I’ll finally have to come to terms with this man as my father.

That’s a hard thing to lose. To grieve.

I guess I’m in denial and maybe a little bit of bargaining.

I just want my dad to be the man I remembered. To be my hero.

Only time will tell.

Love,

Darcie

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