Chapter 24
Best. Mix-up. Ever.
Vivian
Ben has been in the shower for an unusually long time.
Dominic, Jo, and Henry left a while ago now, and I’m starting to wonder if he’s avoiding our conversation.
Dom told me he got things ‘all cued up,’ so I have a feeling Ben knows what this is about, which means if he’s taking this long to shower and get dressed, he’s probably trying to figure out a way to say he doesn’t want my help.
For reasons unknown, I’m already feeling a deep sense of disappointment about it, and I know it’s not just because I put hours of time and energy into this.
It’s because I care about Ben and I want to leave him better off than he was when I showed up in their lives.
He deserves this, and Henry deserves a happy dad who is living out his dream.
All I can do is show him what I’ve prepared and hope he’ll say yes.
In an effort to appear professional, I’ve put on a nice floral dress and put my hair up in a bun.
I also tidied the living room and connected my computer to the TV so I can present everything on the big screen.
I hurry into the kitchen to pour us each a glass of lemon water (very professional, plus adding lemon is a thoughtful touch that shows my attention to detail).
I’m just taking down the glasses when he finally comes out of his room.
He looks fresh and bright-eyed, with a smooth shave, and extra manly in a pair of dark jeans and a clean white T-shirt that gives a nice hint of what’s under it.
Turning from him, I busy myself pouring the waters so as not to drool. “There you are. I thought maybe you weren’t interested.”
Glancing up at him, I see that he looks slightly panicked.
“No, no. I’m definitely interested. In fact, I was so excited I cut myself shaving and I didn’t want to come out with a piece of toilet paper stuck to my cheek.
” He winces, then says, “I probably shouldn’t admit any of that. Can you forget I said that?”
“Okay,” I answer, feeling slightly confused. “I thought we’d do it in the living room, if that’s okay with you.”
“The living room?” he asks, his head snapping back.
“Yeah, I actually connected my laptop to the television so you can get a good look at everything on the big screen.”
His face turns slightly red and his mouth drops. “Really?”
“Oh crap, was that too presumptuous of me? I know some guys are funny about having someone mess with their TVs.”
“No, no, not at all,” Ben says with a slight chuckle. “I absolutely have no problem with any of this. I guess you could say I’m surprised is all. Pleasantly surprised.”
Okay, that’s a bit weird. He’s pleasantly surprised I know how to hook a TV up to my computer? I open the fridge and take out a lemon, then take it over to the sink to wash it. “I don’t know why, but I’m just so nervous, to be honest.”
“Why would you be nervous?” he asks, getting a cutting board out of the cupboard for me. He sets it on the counter and hands me a dish towel to dry the lemon.
Our fingers brush and that aching warmth flows through me. Suddenly I realize what a terrible idea it is for us to be alone together. “I don’t know. I feel like I’m forcing something on you that you may not want.”
“Oh, I want it, believe me,” he says, taking the lemon from me. “Here, let me cut that since you’re so nervous. Or better yet, why don’t I open a bottle of wine instead?”
Is he giving me bedroom eyes? I feel like he’s giving me bedroom eyes.
“Wine would be lovely,” I answer, abandoning the thought of very professional lemon waters.
I watch as he quickly gets two wine glasses out of the cupboard, then grabs a bottle of white from the fridge and a corkscrew.
“Honestly, I have to say your assertiveness makes this whole thing so much better,” he says, opening the wine. “I mean, getting the go-ahead from Dominic and wanting to show it on the big screen. I’m blown away.” Handing me a glass, he says, “I’ve never met a woman like you, Vivian.”
“I’ve never met someone like you either, Ben,” I tell him, my eyes flicking down to his lips. “You’re so talented and hardworking and you’re such a wonderful father. That’s why I wanted to do this.”
“Really?” he asks, looking slightly confused.
“Yes, definitely. You’re an incredible human and you deserve all the good things in life.”
He’s looking at me with a strange expression, and I can’t quite figure out what it is.
Amusement? Bemusement? Maybe one of the other musements?
I take a huge gulp of the cool liquid, hoping it’ll help me calm down.
But the truth is, what I want to do is grab him by the shirt, pull him to me, and kiss him hard on the mouth.
Ben downs half his wine, then sets it on the counter and smiles at me. “God, I’m so glad we’re doing this.”
“I’m so glad you’re glad,” I answer in a dreamy voice. Apparently, any last wisps of professionalism have left the building. I gulp back the rest of my wine, then put the glass down and lean against the island.
He places both hands on my hips and takes a couple of steps toward me so there’s only a hair’s distance between our bodies.
Oh, hello! What’s happening? Not that I’m complaining. In fact, my hands seem to be on his massive biceps. Yes, they are, and that feels very nice indeed.
He leans down a little. “This is all I can think about. I’ve wanted you ever since I first saw you.
Actually, that’s a lie. It was from the first time I heard your voice.
Before you even walked in the house. But after we fooled around in the shop, it got much, much worse.
I can’t even sleep because every time I close my eyes, I’m right here with you.
I keep telling myself that we shouldn’t do this—that it would be wrong in some weird sort of way and confusing and would complicate everything.
But since Dominic is all right with it, I say we go for it.
We’re both single, consenting adults. We both want this.
” He nuzzles my neck, his warm lips running down it to my collar bone, doing all sorts of dreamy things to me.
“We should let ourselves have this, even if it’s just for a while. ”
Somewhere in the far recesses of my mind, a voice is telling me that there must be some sort of mix-up here, but the rest of my brain, as well as my entire body, are shushing that voice because it really sounds like he wants to do all the naked fun things I’ve been fantasizing about for weeks.
Also, his lips are on my ear lobe, and he’s gently running his teeth down it.
I let out a moan that I didn’t know was hidden in there, and turn my face to his so I can kiss him.
There’s nothing tentative or gentle about it.
This is an all-in kiss. The kind that lights the way for all the things to happen.
His hands slide from my hips to my bottom, and he squeezes it, then lifts me onto the counter.
We make out some more, our hands exploring each other over our clothes, then I reach down to the hem of his shirt and lift it over his head and toss it behind me.
He goes back to kissing my neck and I let out a happy sigh, then murmur, “And here I was trying so hard to be professional. This is so much more fun.”
Ben chuckles a little, then says, “Agreed.”
“I want you, Benjamin James,” I whisper, feeling a wave of lust and longing come over me. “I’ve wanted you so badly since I first met you. I can hardly think when I’m around you. I know we shouldn’t be doing this, but I can’t help it.”
“Same here,” he says, crushing my mouth with his. Our tongues find each other, moving together as if they’ve always done this.
We kiss until we’re both out of breath, too frenzied to stop, too filled with lust to care about the future.
There’s only right now. This moment. Together, alone.
We rest our foreheads together for a second to catch our breath, and I whisper, “If anything, we should do this so we can get it out of our systems.”
“Yes,” Ben says in a low tone, his hands traveling up to my breasts. “We should do this over and over again until we’re totally sick of each other.”
He lets out a groan. “It’s going to take a lot of sex to get sick of you.”
I place my hands on his face and kiss him urgently. “So.” Kiss. “Much.” Kiss. “Sex. Over and over.”
Ben picks me up off the counter and I wrap my legs around his waist while he carries me to the couch.
We’re wild with urgency as we help each other strip down, then I straddle his lap and we keep right on going.
I glance at the front door, feeling suddenly terrified that his family will come back before we’re done. “Should we take this to the bedroom?”
“I thought you wanted to do this here, on the TV?”
“What? No, we’d break it.”
He kisses me some more. “Are you serious? You’re gorgeous. And so wild. If you still want to do this on TV, that would be a total turn-on for me.”
“Thanks,” I say, not sure what that has to do with us being too heavy to have sex on his TV. “Honestly though, I don’t think it would be that comfortable.”
He kisses me again, his hands roaming everywhere. “That’s okay. We could try that another time if you want. But no pressure. I’m up for anything.”
“Let’s go to your room. I’m scared your family might walk in at any moment.”
“Your wish is my command,” he says, standing up with me in his arms and carrying me down the hall.
I know we haven’t done this yet, but I already know that this is going to be magic. Incredible. Worth breaking all my rules for.