Chapter 17 Bree
Bree
I’m supposed to be working.
The words on my screen have been blurring all morning.
Because all I can think about is him.
I sneak a look at him through the glass walls of his office. Nico is talking on the phone. With his mouth.
Same mouth that was on me.
My cheeks flush hot and I snap my attention back to my screen.
You’re a mess.
He’s been ice cold since that evening. Colder than before, if that’s even possible.
The temperature in every room drops ten degrees when we occupy it together.
Why did I push him away? We’ve already had sex twice now. It’s obvious we’re attracted to each other. So why...
I don’t know.
Panic, maybe.
Self-preservation.
And now he won’t even look at me.
Well, I pushed him away.
What did I expect?
At 12:30, I grab my phone and escape to the stairwell. Twenty-eight flights of concrete. Nobody comes here except for fire drills.
I sit on the cold steps and call Sora.
She picks up on the second ring. “Please tell me you’re calling to say you quit and you’re moving to Portugal with me.”
“Sora.”
“What? Portugal has great pastries and no billionaires.”
I press my free hand to my forehead. “I need help.”
“Obviously. I’ve been saying this for weeks.”
“I slept with him again.”
Silence. Then: “Spill.”
I tell her everything. The explosive confrontation in my apartment after he followed me. The sex that was somehow angry and tender at the same time. The way he left before sunrise, and tried to pretend things were normal all the rest of that day.
“And last night,” I finish, “we stayed late, and when we were alone in his office we started kissing.”
“Oh my god!” Sora says. “You two can’t take your hands off each other. I’m not sure if that’s cute or gross. So he ravaged you on his desk or what?”
“No!” I reply.
“Oh,” Sora says, sounding disappointed.
“I pushed him away,” I explain.
“Ah.”
“And now he’s treating me colder than ever,” I finish.
Sora makes a sound that’s somewhere between a sigh and a growl. “Why did you push him away?”
“I don’t know. I got scared. It was happening so fast and I just... panicked.”
“Okay. Have you tried talking to him about it?”
I bark out a laugh. “Talking to Nico Rossi about feelings? Sure. Right after I teach a cat to do my taxes.”
“Bree. I’m serious. You can’t keep doing this dance where you sleep together and then pretend it didn’t happen. You went into his office, made out with him, and then pushed him away. He probably thinks you regret it. Not just the kiss, but everything.”
Do I regret it?
That’s the question, isn’t it. The one I’ve been avoiding since I woke up alone in my bed this morning with the sheets still smelling like his cologne.
“I don’t think I regret it,” I admit quietly.
“Then tell him that. Tell him you got scared and put your walls up. Be vulnerable for once. Guys like that.”
My stomach clenches at the word. Vulnerable. The last time I was vulnerable with a man in a position of power over me, I ended up with a destroyed reputation and two years of underemployment.
But Kendrick wasn’t Nico.
How do I know that? How do I know Nico won’t turn around and use everything against me the moment things go wrong?
“I can’t, Sora. That’s too much. That’s asking me to just hand him a loaded gun and trust he won’t shoot.”
“Then at least talk to him. About the kiss. About what happened. If you want any peace, you have to do this.” She pauses. “Your only other option is to quit.”
Quit.
The word lands in my chest like a stone dropped into still water. Ripples spreading outward farther and farther.
I could quit. Walk away from Rossi Industries and never see Nico again. I got my first paycheck the other day, so in theory I have some breathing room to find another admin job and start over.
But even as I think it, something inside me rebels.
And then I realize it.
Oh no.
“Sora,” I say slowly. “I think I might be developing feelings for him.”
She laughs over the line. “Yeah, no shit. You think?”
I shake my head. “This is bad. This is really bad.”
“It’s only bad if you keep avoiding it. I know you’re scared of being seen as the secretary who sleeps with her boss. And look, I know Kendrick messed you up. But you’re not that girl anymore.”
I want to believe her. I really do.
“I have to go,” I tell her. “Lunch break’s almost over.”
“Promise me you’ll think about what I said.”
“I promise.”
“And text me later. I want updates.”
“You’re such a gossip.”
“I prefer ‘invested friend.’ Love you.”
“Love you, too.”
I hang up and sit in the stairwell for another minute, staring at my phone. The screen saver is a photo of me and Sora from college. Both of us laughing at something I can’t remember. We look so young. So unburdened.
It was taken before Kendrick royally screwed me.
Talk to him. Be vulnerable. Or quit.
None of those options feel survivable.
I stand up, brush off my slacks, and head back up to the twenty-eighth floor.
Before I open the door, I’ve made a decision.
I’m going to talk to him.
I just have to work up the courage first.
Tomorrow. I’ll do it tomorrow.