Chapter 13 #3
Mom gives me a look that would challenge a kid’s excitement at seeing Santa on Christmas Eve.
She knows Heart Attack Hill is special to me.
It was always my escape and my proving grounds off the field.
Everyone’s equal there, all pretenses stripped away, leaving only skill and heart.
For me to take Courtney there is telling. I already knew that, but Mom does too.
“I see . . . well, would you like some water? That shirt looks soaked.”
“Sure,” Courtney says, trying to be casual as she follows Mom into the kitchen, but she throws me a ‘told you so’ glare. As she sits at the table, she tells Mom, “Pretty flowers.”
Mom glances over her shoulder, and I can see she’s already getting her Mom Mode on, taking out a pack of bacon, a carton of eggs, and a can of orange juice concentrate.
Mom’s like that, always one to show her love with food.
“Thank you. Kaede sends them to me every few weeks. My sweet boy says I deserve nice things. Your sister is an amazing florist.”
Courtney seems to be silently laughing at her calling me a ‘sweet boy’ and the goo-goo eyes Mom shoots my way, and I guess that’s fair.
I’ve always had a bit of a dark, almost brooding look to me, and I’ve used it to my advantage.
Shockingly, women are drawn to the mysterious and take my silence as a challenge.
Still, even though I’m more than my looks and habits, sweet boy is a reach.
“It does seem like something Kaede would do. He probably has it scheduled in his planner with a reminder alert.”
Mom laughs, and I would like to interject in my defense but I hear a truck pull up outside.
I’m a little nervous to leave them alone, mostly for my sake, but meeting the repairman is why I’m here. I leave them in the kitchen with a warning glare and head into the garage, leaving the connecting door open just in case.
The repairman’s name is Earl, or else he robbed Earl of his shirt.
He saunters in, a guy in his late forties with a crew cut and goatee.
He looks like he’s been doing repair calls already, with a bit of dirt on his hands and under his nails and a weary look of please let this be the last call of the day. I wanna get home for the game.
“How’s it goin’?” he asks, a little bit of a drawl in his voice. “Repair said it’s leakin’?”
“Yeah. It blew a fuse not too long ago, but I replaced that. It’s definitely past its shelf life, but Mom won’t let me replace it. I’m hoping you can talk her into it.”
“I hear ya, man. Moms are the best, but danged if they aren’t stubborn when it suits them.” He smiles congenially. “Let’s see if we can limp it along or if it’s finally done for.”
He gets to work, lying down on the floor of the garage to check underneath the water heater.
“How are you boys doing? Thought you might want some water too. It’s a hot one.” Mom holds a water bottle out to me, and Earl pulls his head out from the water heater.
It takes all of point-oh-two seconds to see his face go from ‘old lady mother’ to ‘holy shit’ when he sees Mom. “Thank you, Mrs. McWarren,” he says, taking the water.
“Oh, it’s Ms., not Mrs. My husband passed on a long time ago, but please, call me Donna,” Mom says.
“Well, thank you . . . Donna. I’m Earl.” Mom smiles while Earl takes a big swallow of the water. “That hits the spot. It's a scorcher today.”
I feel like the lamest third wheel ever, and though I know Mom is single and probably dates, I don’t need to see her getting picked up right in front of my very eyes.
“So, what’s the diagnosis?” I lift my chin toward the old water heater.
“Honestly? This thing should have been replaced years ago. I’ll give credit to whoever’s been patching this thing,” Earl says, looking my way, “but it’s about two steps from blowing up on you.”
“Replace it. And send the bill to me,” I tell Earl.
Mom is having none of that ,though. “Absolutely not, Kaede. You head on inside and get my checkbook so I can pay Earl myself for the heater. And the matter is not up for discussion.”
Okay, one—I think Mom just shooed me inside so I wouldn’t interfere with whatever flirt fest she’s got going on, and two—not many people can put me in my place, especially in front of strangers, but Mom is one. Maybe the only one.
The matter isn’t closed, though. If I have to, I’ll sneak a little money into her coat pocket or the fruit bowl in the kitchen to help make up the difference.
I do it all the time, and she usually just thinks she’s forgetful and didn’t remember setting aside her change from something.
I’m happy to be her secret twenty-dollar-bill angel.
Inside, I find Courtney standing at the stove stirring eggs like she’s made herself right at home. I can’t explain what the sight does to me. It’s something warm and bright and deep.
She looks over her shoulder when she hears the door close behind me. The smile on her lips is full of ‘I know something you don’t know’, and I can’t wait to hear it. “What?”
“Your mom is your biggest fan, did you know that?” Courtney is tiptoeing me toward something I’m certain is going to be ridiculously embarrassing.
“What did she say?”
“I never knew how much of a catch you are,” Courtney teases lightly. “According to what your mom told me, you’re the catch of the year and the country’s most eligible bachelor.”
I groan, rubbing my temples. Maybe bringing Courtney here was a bad idea. “Oh, God, I’m sorry.”
“And she’s really hoping you find someone special to give her grandbabies while, and I quote, she’s young enough to get on the floor and play around with them, end quote.
She assured me that she wants to be an involved grandma.
Again, her words.” Courtney’s eyes twinkle, and I know she’s enjoying the hell out of this.
Thing is, Courtney and I would make some beautiful babies. Dark-haired, dark-eyed, honey-complexioned babies with a brilliant combination of brains and beauty.
I stare open-mouthed at Courtney, horrified both at my Mom’s overbearing selling of me like I can’t get women on my own and my own wayward thoughts. Courtney laughs and stirs the eggs like it’s par for the course.
Mom comes into the kitchen behind me, Earl hot on her heels. I raise a brow his way when I see his eyes on Mom’s ass, but he’s too caught up in her to even notice my unspoken threat.
“Did you find my checkbook? Earl can get a new tankless setup here tomorrow afternoon.” Mom flashes him a look like he’s promising baskets full of kittens and puppies that will never grow old, always stay sweet and snuggly, and never once piss or shit on the floor, not the water heater I’ve been trying to get her to take for years.
“Service call payment today. Water heater payment tomorrow, after it’s installed and working properly.” It sounds harsher than I mean it to, but I’m a little on edge with Courtney at home in my kitchen, Mom getting picked up right in front of me, and little baby Courtneys dancing through my head.
Earl holds his hands up. “Of course. No payment needed today, either. I didn’t fix anything yet.”
Mom activates the Mom Look that I’ve seen in my nightmares since I was a kid. “I’m sorry for Kaede’s rudeness, Earl. Why don’t you come on in? I was just making brunch for the kids and you’re welcome to join.”
“I would love that, Donna. Thank you. My lunch is usually a drive-thru between service calls, so something home-cooked would be a real treat.”
Courtney turns off the stove and peeks into the oven. “Bacon should be done too.” She pulls it out as Mom throws bread into the four-slice toaster.
“Boys, you sit down. We’ll get this all ready,” Mom directs, and Earl and I sit across the table from one another in this Twilight Zone universe where Mom and I are suddenly on a double-date.
“Courtney, dear, as I was telling you . . . Kaede is such a catch. Did you know he’s been working on that water heater for years?
He kept that thing running long after it should’ve died.
He’s handy like that. And smart? Whoo, I quit being able to help him with his school work in middle school, and he’s the brains behind that business of his.
” Mom doesn’t stop there, even though she basically just insulted Courtney’s brother. “He’s so good with money and people—”
“Mom!” I yell. “Seriously? I don’t need you to sell me to Courtney like I’m a used car.”
She at least has the decency to blush. “Well, I just wanted to make sure she knows because you’re so quiet sometimes that she might miss what’s right in front of her.”
I look to the ceiling as Courtney and Earl both giggle. Yeah, the blue collar repairman is giggling at me too.
“It’s fine, Kaede,” Courtney tries to say, though her lips are still twitching as she fights another laugh.
“On that note, I think we’ll head out before you drag out my baby books and football tapes.” I’m shaking my head, more settled and good-natured about this whole thing but still embarrassed beyond measure.
“What? Oh, honey, don’t be silly. Sit down and have lunch,” Mom argues. But I see her eyes tick to Earl.
Shit. I think she wants a chance to have lunch with Earl without me as much as I want to get Courtney out of here. At least I know, by Mom’s overzealous selling of me to Courtney, that she likes Courtney for me. And that was the question I wanted answered.
I get up, kissing her temple. “It’s fine, Mom. Have a good lunch,” I say pointedly with a small smile of approval.
Her returning smile speaks volumes. For so long, it was the two of us against the world.
I can virtually read her mind, and she can read mine.
She needs this, a chance to feel like herself, not a mom or a nurse but a woman on a date with a man who finds her attractive.
As hard as that is for me to think about, I do want her to be happy.