Chapter 9 #2
Julian and I had just said goodbye to ten guests – five of Julian’s business associates and their (intolerable) trophy wives – who we’d hosted for a fortnight as we’d sailed the French Riviera.
It had been a soul-crushing experience, despite the luxurious lifestyle and beautiful setting, and I was trying to pluck up the courage to ask about returning to London. Alone.
We were supposed to sail down to Valencia to collect a new cohort of hangers-on for yet another fortnight of sailing, and I couldn’t stomach the thought of more inane conversations with vacuous wives. There was only so much you could say – or hear – about designer handbags and face lifts.
And it may sound implausible, but day after day of 25°C and cloudless blue skies becomes mind-numbingly dull.
I missed springtime in London – sun showers and bundling up to go to the farmers’ market to buy daffodils and asparagus, the joy of waking up to a crisp spring morning with its milky blue sky and frost on the ground.
I longed for London. And I missed Claude.
I had the steward bring a bottle of Krug to our suite, aiming to ply Julian with his favourite Champagne, seduce him, then ask to leave the following day.
We made it as far as his toast, To finally being alone, when I broke down in tears and confessed that I was miserable, that I needed real life, not this picture-perfect endless holiday.
He drew me onto his lap, where I curled up, and he stroked my hair.
We talked for a long time, then he picked me up and carried me to the bed where he made love to me – tenderly, lovingly.
And the next morning, a helicopter collected me from the yacht and flew me to Marseilles airport so I could return to London.
I broke free from the memory, then took a deep breath.
It was never the same between us after that. Julian needed a wife who was at his beck and call and that simply wasn’t me. The cheating started soon after I returned to London, and you know the rest.
‘You look deep in thought,’ said Tommy. I hadn’t noticed him approach, and he took me by surprise.
‘Just…’ I trailed off, leaving the thought unfinished.
‘Brings back memories, eh?’
I tore my eyes from the view and looked at him. ‘Which part are you referring to exactly? Being on Julian’s yacht or spending another day with you?’
‘Is that such a hardship?’ he asked, a sliver of hurt in his eyes.
‘Nope,’ I answered lightly. ‘As long as you keep your distance.’
I started to walk away but he called after me. ‘Ally—’
I rounded on him. ‘Yes, Tom?’ I stared at him expectantly.
He stepped closer. ‘I still need to talk to you.’ He lifted his head and looked around, his lips disappearing between his teeth. ‘But not here.’
‘Honestly, Tommy – this is driving me mad. Can’t you just tell me?’
‘I will – I promise,’ he said, his eyes returning to meet mine. ‘Just… Can we meet up after we get back to Aetheria? Somewhere private. I could come to your villa.’
A big fat nope to that – I did not want Tommy in my villa. I shook my head sharply.
‘Or I could meet you at the boat,’ he offered, sounding frustrated. ‘We’d have it to ourselves.’
‘I notice you didn’t invite me to your staff accommodation.’
‘No, er…’
‘Against company policy? Or is it because you’re sharing with Elsa?’
‘Ally,’ he warned.
‘What?’ I replied, narrowing my eyes at him. Wonderful, I was back to being the petulant, jealous version of me – without a shred of hard evidence to justify it.
‘Fine,’ I said, ‘just come to my villa, tell me whatever it is you’re dying to tell me, then we can stop this… this… dance.’
‘Dance?’
He seemed genuinely confused and I wondered if I’d got things wrong – maybe this situation was only difficult for me. Maybe Tommy and Elsa were on their way to living happily ever after and that’s what he needed to tell me.
My stomach lurched.
‘Doesn’t matter,’ I said, flicking my hand dismissively.
But it did matter.
It mattered so incredibly much that if I stood there a moment longer, I might burst into tears. I left Tommy, seeking out the others to take refuge in their cheeriness.
One of the stewards was walking Trudy through the physics of glass jacuzzis.
I left that alone – I’d endured that explanation when Julian had the bloody thing installed and once was enough.
And nearby Niki and Scott were chatting.
Nope, sorry, debating: Scotland versus Australia – which had the most impressive natural wonders?
I left that alone too – no way was I wandering into the fray between two passionate patriots.
Instead, I hung back from the others and sipped my Krug. What on earth does Tommy want to tell me? I was running through every possibility I could imagine when Scott called for our attention. The tender was waiting to take us to the island.
‘Ooh, I can’t wait!’ said Trudy, necking the rest of her Krug.
I looked at my half-full glass and did the same. I could pretend to have fun with the best of them, but being a tad inebriated made it just a tad easier.