Chapter 5 Emery
EMERY
His hands grip my thighs, keeping me pinned open for him as he laps at my pussy.
My head drops back and my fingers thread through his soft hair, fisting tightly as he flicks my clit with his tongue and presses two fingers deep inside me. I moan loudly into the expansive dark room.
It hits me then: I have no clue where I am.
I push myself up to my elbows, looking around frantically, only finding a vast sea of darkness. This isn’t Fury Squad’s barrack, but the empty and fearful feeling I get from being down here swarms me.
I know this place. I know it well, yet I cannot name it.
The man rises from my center, looking up at me with such lovely, somber eyes. White hair that drapes over his forehead when it’s mussed like it is right now. That achingly alluring scar that cuts down his eye.
Mori.
My lungs still and panic seizes my chest.
He’s completely unclothed, that old deep wound that I’ve had visions about scores down his sternum just as I foresaw, a tattoo surrounds it, tracing his underlying bones.
“Mori?” My voice is lost to the darkness, coming out muffled and dull. He smiles as if he heard it, grabbing my wrists and pinning them to the ground.
A roar of sound pierces my ears as lights blur out everything around me. I shut my eyes quickly and as I do, the weight of Mori dissipates.
I hesitantly open my eyes and find myself now surrounded by a forest. The ground is cold beneath me and I’m sitting just a few feet away from a fallen cadet. His uniform is black, a small symbol on his right chest pocket: the letters DF are encased in a gold circle.
His face is covered in blood, and I don’t recognize who he is.
As I’m about to draw closer, his head snaps up, eyes off-center and bloodshot as he says, “You know what happened to me.” His ominous words are impossibly loud and reverberate through me as a shudder runs down my spine.
My eyes flash open and I’m met with the bottom of Mori’s top bunk.
I take a few deep breaths to collect myself before slowly sitting up and looking around just to be sure that I’m actually awake. Once I verify that I am, I deflate and swallow the knot in my throat. Sweat clings to my back and has completely soaked through my shirt.
That was horrifying, I reflect as I quietly slip from my bunk and grab a spare set of lounging clothes before tiptoeing toward the door.
I spare a glance back to make sure I didn’t disturb anyone and am relieved to find that even Mori is still motionless in his bed. A soft rhythm of snores fills the room.
I’m glad I didn’t cry out in my sleep. What a nightmare that would’ve been. I wash my hair under the hot water and lather my body with woodsy scented soap.
Who was that man with the odd message in my dream? My scrubbing slows as I try to place him in my memory to no avail. His features were too hidden by the blood that stained them. The only thing I am certain of is the fear and horror I felt in that moment. It was too vivid to just have been a dream.
That was someone I once knew. Someone who I now believe to likely be dead.
I wrap my arms around myself and let the hot water wash away the dreadful images. Then I recall what was happening just before in the darkness.
Mori. He was consuming me, feeding on me like he couldn’t get enough.
My stomach flips and heat collects low in my core. I swallow the saliva that plumes on my tongue at the thought of his fingers deep inside me, his mouth sucking on my flesh so fervently.
I cover my face with both hands and slap my cheek a few times. Not him. That must’ve just been a stress-induced dream. Even though it felt as real as the following one, I can’t let myself believe that me and Mori were physical before.
For crying out loud, he won’t even tell me his real name.
The fresh clothes are a relief to be in. I decide to leave my hair down until it air dries, then I’ll attempt braiding it.
It can’t be that hard to do on my own. I practice moving my fingers the way I remember Mori doing and stare down at my hands as I’m exiting the communal showers. The moment I take the turn back toward our squad’s dorm I smack into someone.
The blood drains from my face and I gasp loudly. Hands flying to my mouth to stifle the sound.
I whisper shout, “You scared the shit out of me!” My eyes drift up, then farther up, finding Mori towering above me, gazing down with doubt in his gaze.
Oh my God, why? Why him of all the times and places? Why now after such a heated dream?
He firms his mouth into a rigid line as I take a huge step back. “What are you doing up?” he asks suspiciously.
After the dream I just had of his tongue inside me, my head is completely empty of excuses.
I can’t even give him a reason why. My cheeks flush and I turn abruptly, fully intending to march straight back into the bathroom and wait for my hair to dry rather than speaking with Mori in a dark hallway while everyone else is asleep.
His hand catches my wrist. I jolt at the warm contact of our skin. My pulse leaps into my throat.
“Emery, what’s wrong?” he asks with concern blooming in his tone.
I shake my head and try to sound fine. “I had a bad dream.”
His hand flinches, perhaps becoming aware of the contact between us, before loosening and sliding down to my fingertips, then letting go.
“About what?” He sounds tense. I glance over my shoulder and take in his grim expression. Chills wash down my neck. He grips the book he has in his other hand tightly.
“I don’t remember,” I lie. A warm trickle of liquid slips over my lips. Mori’s eyes trace the movement before I can react.
His eyes fill with torment as he walks past me, hooking an arm around my waist as he does, and guides me back to the bathroom with him.
Blood stains the back of my hand after I wipe my nose a few times. Damn it. The side effects are hitting already? I thought I’d get a few days or weeks before symptoms reared up. My stomach twists at the thought that my body could take a swift deep dive into ruin, or even death.
I remain quiet as Mori has me sit down on the bathroom bench while he grabs a towel. I glance down at the book he set down, grinning, because of course he would have it with him.
“Tip your head back,” he orders, wiping my chin and lips off before holding it over my nose.
I let out a long breath and do as he says.
“Do the symptoms usually show up this quickly?” I ask, voice nasally from him plugging my nostrils.
A smug grin forms on his face. “What, now you want my input? I told you not to go through with this,” he scolds.
I narrow my eyes at him and he chuckles, his expression softening.
“Yeah, it’s normal. It’s a good sign too, because if your nose didn’t bleed you would’ve dropped dead like many of the others did and you would’ve been in a lot of pain. ”
My eyes widen. Nolan left that part out.
“So, I’m okay?”
“Define ‘okay’ because you look like you’ve been through the wringer.” His voice is gentle as he looks at me with a million thoughts racing behind his gaze.
“I told you, I had a bad dream.” No, I will absolutely not give him details about the ominous man with blood on his face, or Mori himself being knuckles deep inside me.
He only grunts as his response and then we share an uncomfortable few minutes in silence before he pulls the towel back to see if the bleeding has stopped. When he seems satisfied, he steps back and waits for me to confirm.
I let my head tilt back to its normal position and take a few deep breaths. No more blood comes out.
“Crisis averted,” I joke, standing and about to head back to our dorm. “I didn’t need your help for a bloody nose, by the way,” I add.
He considers me briefly before shrugging.
“All right, suit yourself then. Don’t come crying to me when you start vomiting up dark blood.
” Mori grabs his book off the bench and strolls out of the bathroom without another word.
Instead of turning to the right where our barracks are, he hooks a left toward the gym.
My jaw tenses. Vomiting?
Maybe I’m being too stiff around him. I shouldn’t let my lucid dream make things uncomfortable between us… I mean, he has been making a real effort today.
“Fuck,” I mutter under my breath and rub my eyes with annoyance. I’d better try to make amends since it looks like neither of us are going back to bed any time soon.
With my dignity put aside, I head to the gym. I find Mori lounging on one of the fitness bikes, reading as if he doesn’t have a care in the world. His legs pump the pedals at a moderate, even pace.
I stand at the door, uncertain of how to approach him after being rude.
Without looking back at me, he calls out, “Come on. Take a seat.”
My body stiffens. I didn’t think he heard me come in. I swallow my pride and walk over to the fitness bike beside him, sitting down and placing my feet on the pedals. I’m not in the mood to work out so I just use them as a footrest.
Mori continues cycling and reading his book. His sage eyes move quickly over the pages, taking in the words as if he’s read them a hundred times already. He senses my gaze and glances at me, expressionless.
“Look… I’m sorry I got short with you. I really would like for us to get along if it’s possible.” I manage to get the words out without choking on them. The embarrassment burns in my cheeks, though.
“You want to get along with me?” he scoffs. “Rather unlikely, don’t you think?” He doesn’t let his eyes move from his book.
Okay, back to being a cold asshole I see. I curl my fingernails into my pants. Deep breath.
“It doesn’t seem unlikely, given that we used to be close,” I say matter-of-factly to see if he’ll call my bluff. All of the hints are there, though. Him braiding my hair, the way his body was so detailed in my dream… I’m certain that we were once more than what we are now.
Mori lifts his eyes from the pages and stares emptily at me. “What’s my name then? If we’re so close, you should know it.” His tone is taunting.
Not the direction I saw this going, but I can work with it.
“I don’t remember your name, but I know you have a scar on your chest. From the base of your throat to here.
” I draw a line down my chest to where my sternum ends.
His eyes widen and he sits forward a bit.
I knew it. He always showers before everyone else gets up and never goes shirtless like the others. So how else would I know that?
“You remember that?” His voice lowers with thought—with hope.
I nod slowly. “I dreamed of it.”
He sets his book down and shifts on his seat to face me. “You dreamed of me…shirtless?” A devious smile curls the ends of his lips. My cheeks catch fire and my heart pounds harder.
“No…yes. It’s not like that.” It was like that. His amusement doesn’t fade. “I want us to get along, okay? I only pushed you away because you’re constantly doing the same to me. Can we put our differences aside?”
Mori’s face sullens, then he looks down and furrows his brows with intent. “Fine. But don’t expect much past getting along,” he snipes. I grin at how unthreatening it sounds. I’m starting to think he’s all teeth and no bite.
“What are you always reading anyway?” I lean forward to steal a glance at his book. He pulls it behind his back and a boyish grin flashes across his lips.
“I’m afraid I don’t like sharing what I read.”
“Why? Is it a weapons manual?” I tease, fully prepared for him to confirm such a boring fascination.
His brow quirks. “A weapons what? Do you truly think I’m that dry?” I reach for the book behind his back while he’s still reeling at my comment, and he jerks back, raising his arm high so I can’t reach it. In the process I lose my grip on the bar of his fitness bike and slip.
We both fall to the ground, his back hitting the soft pads covering the floor, and me tumbling down onto his chest. The workout equipment clanks and our feet are wrapped up in the pedals and one another.
I groan from the pressure my ankle has on it, but no pain flares up my leg. My eyes spring open and I look up, my nose only a breath away from Mori’s. His eyes light up as mine do. A nervous smile creeps up the corners of my lips. Heat pulses through my veins.
“I can’t feel any pain.” The words seem lost on him as he takes me in. His throat bobs as his eyes drift down to my lips. Then all of the other sensations dawn on me as I become very aware of how we’re touching.
Mori has one hand pressed to the ground, supporting us at a slight angle, his other arm is securely wrapped around my back. My heart stammers.
“Then I guess it wouldn’t really make sense for me to ask if you’re okay, would it?” he murmurs an inch from my lips. The warmth of his breath making my core twist greedily.
I remember that warmth between my legs. The way it made pure ecstasy roll through my lower stomach and draws aches through my core, begging to be filled by him.
My throat bobs. “No, I suppose it wouldn’t.” My trembling voice seems to spark eagerness within him.
Mori inhales sharply, his hand tightening over my lower back.
His gaze is heavy and lingers long after he asks me anyway, “Are you all right, Em?” His words are simple, and yet they reach deep inside me, stirring up emotions that I didn’t think someone like him could.
“Yes,” I whisper back.
After a second he seems to remember himself and clears his throat.
“Here, sit up and I’ll get our shoes untangled from the pedal.” I do as he says, and try to not let his birch scent and his warm body beneath mine make me irrational.
Why do I wish that he would’ve kissed me?