Chapter 9 Fallon
FALLON
Before my promotion, I had moved into my own one-bedroom apartment at the end of November.
With only my bed, dresser and a desk, my family felt sorry for me and gave me a couch and TV as housewarming gifts.
I didn’t care that I had almost nothing to move and the apartment was nearly empty.
I loved my new place. It was close to work so I could walk if the weather permitted it. Otherwise, I could easily get a taxi.
In a matter of only weeks, I now had my own place and my own office. I went to work energized and came home happy.
The only complaint I had, and it was probably me just being over-sensitive, was that Keir had started taking Clea to lunch. A lot. Or so it seemed. Three times in one week seemed like a lot to me.
The third time Keir took Clea to lunch, I wasn’t sure how to feel about it. Obviously, I didn’t own his time. Especially his breaktime. But Clea hated me and it was hard not to squirm wondering what they talked about.
It was a good thing I had my equations. They distracted me from thinking too much about all of it.
Work was fun for me. I would lose time and when the end of the day came it was like waking from a good dream.
But that day, when Keir came in late in the afternoon to update himself on my work, I didn’t feel like my usual self. Maybe I wasn’t well. I had no idea.
Keir sat down beside me in the extra chair by my desk. “You didn’t work through lunch, did you?”
A tickle of discomfort ran down my spine.
“No.” It was a partial lie. I’d gotten a sandwich from the cart downstairs and ate it at my desk while I continued to work trying not to think of Keir and Clea together.
“I would have preferred to stay in for lunch,” Keir said.
I blinked, trying to make sense of his statement. Why was he telling me? He could do whatever he wanted with his time.
“Clea needs extra attention lately.”
“Because of me?”
He frowned. “Why do you say that?”
I shrugged. My eyes warmed.
“You’re very astute,” he said softly. “She was the next up for promotion.”
Everything in my body tensed. This was bad for Keir. He shouldn’t have to deal with petty dramas. Maybe if I had done what she’d suggested and slowed down a bit, people in Control would like me better.
“She’s a valuable team member. I need her at prime working condition. I need all of them.”
“I know.” Inside my chest a strange coldness hardened. But my eyes were hot, almost itchy.
“I’m glad to hear that.” Abruptly, he added, “I did toy with firing her.”
I looked up at him with blurred vision, taking in a soft breath.
“You don’t have to say anything.” Had his voice gotten softer? “I know you never would. But I have ears and eyes.”
Did that mean he knew Clea hated me? I wished I could read people better.
“Wh—why would you fire her?” And why was he telling me? I was sure my wide-eyed look made me appear guilty.
“Because she was disrupting the team flow. If someone is disruptive, the entire team suffers. I’m pretty forgiving, though.” He ruffled some papers on my desk.
“I—I’m sorry.”
“For what? You’ve done everything I’ve asked of you and more.” He turned again and looked straight at me. “You’ve never complained. Not even about my lunches with Clea.”
“Sir… Keir. I wouldn’t.”
“Look, I wouldn’t ever do anything to make you uncomfortable. It was all business. And to make sure she understood some things.”
“It’s none of my business.”
“Hmm. But you’re glad I told you, right?”
I gazed right into his eyes, brows tight in question. Not because I didn’t understand him this time, but because I did. And I was shocked that he was right. How did he know?
“Hey, I know she’s not always warm and nice, but it’s all settled. Not personal.” He paused.
Our eye contact had gone on a little long and I looked away.
“Are you all right?” he asked.
“Yeah,” I croaked.
“Because discomfort and hurt feelings are real.”
I didn’t have an equation for that. I had a mom I could vent to. But lately, she’d been cool toward me. She was still getting over me leaving the workshop so I hadn’t talked to her much at all, especially about my new job. But she had been a part of helping me with new furniture.
“I just like to work. As long as I can do that, I’m happy.” My voice came out low, unconvincing. But it was the truth.
“You’re pretty amazing, you know that?” Keir asked.
Now my face heated. It was a lot coming from my boss. And from a man I liked even more than just as a co-worker. “Thank you.”
Keir had a way of making me feel special. He probably did that with everyone, even Clea, which was why he had taken her out to lunch.
But I reminded myself Clea didn’t have her own office.
I relaxed at that thought.
Keir and I spent the rest of the day working together. I dived into the numbers and felt myself bloom. I lost time. Again.
I was in Control when I overheard three team members say, “We’re all going shifting tonight after work.”
I kept my head down and focused on the work I was doing at one console. Deke, the guy next to me, leaned toward me. “Are you going?”
“Where?”
“To the shifter party.”
“I shook my head.”
Someone must have overheard his question because I heard a voice say loudly, “He’s not invited.” I didn’t look to see who spoke. It wasn’t Clea. Her head was bent over a computer screen ignoring it all.
As I continued to look at my screen, the symbols, letters and numbers scrambled in my mind. I got up and started to walk out. That was when I heard Keir. When had he arrived?
I glance up and saw him on the upper level.
He said, voice calm but loud enough for everyone to hear. “We’re all a team here, remember?”
Silence.
How much had Keir heard?
I continued walking. Footsteps came up behind me. It was Deke.
“They said you’re invited. For real.”
“It’s okay. I’m busy anyway.” I kept going.
It was for the best. A shifter party would mean they would all find out I couldn’t fly. That was something I wanted to keep private.
Back in my office, I sat for a few minutes, eyes closed, letting my mind forget what had just happened.
I heard footfalls and my eyelids snapped open. Keir stood in the doorway.
“You didn’t have to do that.” My voice sounded louder than I’d intended.
“It’s my job to remind my people we are a team. That’s how we work.”
“But you heard it all, didn’t you?”
“I heard enough.”
I leaned forward and put my elbows on my desk. I leaned my head into my hands.
“It’s my fault. I’m not friendly enough or something. I work too fast.”
Keir came in and shut the door, sitting before me. “It is very wrong of you to think that.”
“I need to handle it myself.”
“Yes. But I need to take the reins, too.”
“It just makes them think I’m your favorite or something. Which makes it worse.”
“I’m being careful about that.”
I rubbed at my face. “I know. You shouldn’t have this on your plate with everything else.”
“It’s my job. Besides, you are my favorite.”
I looked up at him, my mouth dropping open. “You can’t say that.”
“It’s the truth. They’ll have to get used to it.
You’re one of the first who’s come through here who speaks my language fluently and challenges my mind.
I’ve missed that. When I was younger—still in school—that was such a great feeling.
You’ve brought that back to me just when the job felt like it was becoming too routine. You inspire me.”
“I do?”
Keir nodded slowly. “Remember that. My team is good. They get things done. But not like you. You’re rare. Different. It’s a good thing. Remember that.”
His pep talk helped. My body relaxed. I knew he did these talks for everyone, but this felt more personal.
Special. He said I was inspiring. Rare. I’d been different my whole life.
Working with Keir had given me purpose these last weeks.
Maybe I didn’t quite fit in with the team, but I fit with him.
When he left the room, his wonderful alpha scent lingered. I breathed it all the way into the depths of my being. Comforted. Enamored. Feeling things I could never confess to him.
It was wonderful. If I could be around Keir for the rest of my life, even if only in the workplace, I’d be happy.
Whenever Keir leaned in close I smelled him, more than just alpha Christmas spice, but special, intense. My body would go all warm and liquid.
One day, I pulled back.
“What is it?”
“Your scent.”
“Is it a problem?”
I couldn’t find words to answer.
“I can use a scent blocker if that would help.”
“No. It’s not a problem. I like it.” The words floated from my mouth as if I was not the one speaking.
“Oh. Uh. Okay.” His eyes turned a bit fiery in their bluish depths.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”
“You’re fine.” He blinked. “It’s flattering. To me. That you. Said that.”
Keir had never stunted his sentences with me.
My shoulders hunched. What had I done? I ducked my head.
As I peered at him through my lashes, he looked all strong and glowing.
As if a spotlight had come out of the ceiling to shine directly onto him.
He was beautiful. He made my throat go tight, my stomach turn to liquid.
My uncontrolled mind started to flash at lightspeed on a hundred different scenarios of me going to him, touching him, asking him to put his arms around me.
Every sense came into play, what that might feel like, what that might sound like with his breath in my hair all hot and fast. I was sure his muscles would be like home. His skin would taste like candy.
I shook my head fast to clear it.
“Okay?” he asked, still glowing.
“Yeah. Fine.”
I lied about being fine. When I went home, his scent followed me into my apartment. I sat before my warm hearth in my very own space. I should have been happy. And I was. I had made a new life for myself in less than two months. A beautiful life. But something was wrong deep inside.
Keir’s scent lingered even here. In the air and on my clothes. My body went cold, then hot. I took a shower, then made myself a sandwich and cocoa. The chills returned followed by heat waves.
Was I in heat?
I checked myself mentally. No slick. No current arousal. Maybe it was only a cold.
I took some aspirin and watched a movie under my favorite fuzzy blanket. I woke on my couch the next morning surprised I hadn’t awakened to get myself to bed.
Assessing my body, I found the good night’s sleep had actually refreshed me. I was fine. I had worried myself over nothing.
When I arrived at work, Keir met me outside our facing offices. “Come with me to Control. I have an announcement. Everyone should hear it.”
I hung up my jacket and scarf and followed him downstairs. In Control I stayed back, grabbing one of the chairs to sit as Keir walked to the upper level where he could look down and address the team.
“Morning everyone,” Keir began.
My gaze wandered about the room, landing on Clea. She was staring at me but when caught she turned her head fast, pretending to be focused on Keir.
A slight pain went through my chest. I told myself she didn’t matter. But she did matter to Keir. He needed her. I would ignore my feelings. I’d do anything for Keir. He should be able to do his job without stupid reindeer games.
Keir continued. “Your work has been exemplary this season. Santa is pleased. I’ve been able to update him often. He’s grateful for all we do here. It ensures his flights are even safer and smoother with every season.
“Which brings me to my point for coming here this morning. You’ll all receive a more detailed email later, but I wanted to inform you in person.
This week’s forecast predicts a pretty hefty oncoming storm.
We’ll begin to feel the effects by tomorrow with heavy snow and wind.
We’re hoping it wears itself out by Christmas Eve, but it’s too early to be confident in that.
“We’re all used to inclement weather this time of year, including on Christmas Eve.
And we’ve dealt with it well together when it comes.
We’ve gone through some tense moments, some more years than others, but this team is trained for it.
I’m going to need you all round the clock, taking turns with longer shifts.
We’re well-set for Christmas Eve. Our work shows it on all the sleigh upgrades and corrections.
Our third flight test was near perfect. But…
we have a lot of analysis of this stormfront to take care of.
It could be nothing major. We don’t know yet.
Work with each other to make sure everyone gets enough rest and food and breaks.
This week is our most important, as you all know.
We need to be studying this storm. It will be changing before our eyes.
That’s why I need you all in your best work mode.
We will be wanting to run more tests with simulations of this weather event. ”
“Sir.” A team member named Rian raised his hand.
“Yes.”
“You just called it an event. Is it different from the blizzards that pass by here in December?”
“That’s what we’ll all be working on figuring out,” Keir replied. “We leave nothing to chance. Right? That’s our motto right now.”
As Keir continued to answer more questions, I couldn’t take my eyes off him. He was definitely the most alpha of elves. And of anyone in the entire room. He was magnificent in his white sweater and black wool trousers. A leader worthy enough to actually fly Santa’s sleigh.
At that moment, I wondered if he had Santa blood in him.
Santa was an offshoot of the elven race, but a different sort of being.
The mystery surrounding Santa created wonder and enchantment here at the North Pole.
Before I was born, when Santa started his story more than a century ago, everyone had questions.
Those questions never stopped. Santa wasn’t talking.
No one even knew how old he was. But surely he’d had parents.
How else did he get here? There had to be others of his kind.
Was that rare DNA spread secretly among certain elves?
Or maybe Santa’s kind was born of elves but a mutation?
Santa seemed content to stay to himself.
He had no mate, no children. Yet he was jolly and full of generosity and love.
He’d created the year-round Christmas village, imported the forest for the reindeer to play in, and paid for everything from bottomless funds from a source that people could only speculate on.
I believed he was a true immortal.
Keir finished his speech and we went back upstairs. I followed.
“Is the weather really a worry this time?” I asked.
“We never know for sure. We have to be prepared.”
“Show me what you have,” I said. “I’ll start analyzing right away.”