Chapter 3
Stormy
Not yet? I don’t know what to think about that, but I do think Kannen is scary. Not that he physically intimidates me in the least. What’s scary is how strong my attraction toward him is.
Because although I long for happiness, long to be held in strong arms when I’m feeling beat up by life, I know better.
As my father left the family home the first of many times to cheat, I’d asked him why and he said it was because I wasn’t lovable.
I did my best to discard the sting from those words. But then my ex said the same thing.
Which is why I decided to keep my heart to myself. It won’t do me any good to love someone else.
I glance at Kannen. But why does he have to look that rugged? Why does he have to be that fit? Look that strong?
He’s seated across from me at a small table inside the mobile office trailer.
We divided the list of tasks associated with the rodeo and we’ve been making phone calls for a little over two hours now.
I’ve had to fight to keep from looking at him the entire time and my no sex determination is taking a beating.
Finally, though, I’m halfway through my list of vendors who’ve agreed to be part of the event. My fingers ache from all the note writing. I forgot my laptop at home and Kannen didn’t bring one either.
I massage my hands to ease the ache, and the movement makes him look up.
His face is well sculpted, his jawline hard, but his eyes are soft, filled with concern. “You okay?”
Other than my sisters, I can’t recall the last time anyone else asked me that question.
“Too much writing,” I say.
“Holding something warm might help ease the ache.” He gets up and I look at how he’s filling out his jeans. Dammit. I duck my head as he walks to the end of the trailer where the coffee pot sits.
“Coffee or cocoa?” he asks.
“Beer,” I say. “Lots of cold beer.” To cool my heated body.
He grins over his shoulder at me.
And the attraction doubles down and slams harder into my willpower. This isn’t good.
I drop my attention back to the paper and scan it again even though I’ve read the list enough to know it by heart.
“Stormy.”
I look at him.
“What do you want?” he asks.
The fluorescent light in the center of the ceiling emits a low hum. Same, light, same. My body is humming, wanting to tell him precisely what I want and give locations, but that could lead to emotional complications. My heart needs to be protected and I’m the only one who can do that.
“Cocoa. Coffee will keep me up.”
He turns back to coffee pot and waits for the hot water cycle to finish running. His shirt is short sleeved, his forearms tanned and muscled. So muscled.
I swallow and try not to look at his ass in those snug jeans but it’s a losing battle. Then he turns and I’m left staring at his zipper.
“Marshmallows?” he asks like he didn’t notice.
“No.”
He finishes making it, then sets the cup in front of me. “It’s ready,” he says.
So am I. I force myself not to look at his zipper again and search my brain for something to steer my thoughts away from the track they’re on. “Did you hear anything else about which one of the Richfords might be your brother?”
Kannen shakes his head. “Not yet.”
Kannen’s grandfather recently let it slip that he was adopted as a child.
After he confronted his adoptive parents, they told him he has a brother he never knew.
The only information they would share is that they discovered his brother had spent years at what was known as The Gentle Children’s Home.
From what I’ve heard about the place, there was nothing gentle about it. It was a place of nightmares for the children who were there.
“You could just ask all the Richfords to take a DNA test.”
“I was going to but changed my mind. I don’t want to do a DNA test yet. My folks said they kept the information from me because of what my biological parents were like. They wouldn’t tell me anything else about them.”
His face tightens and I can only imagine the sense of betrayal he experienced finding everything out years after the fact.
“So what are you going to do?”
“I’m waiting on the private investigator I hired to find information on a couple that might be my biological parents. If they’re bad news, no matter how much I want to know who my brother is, I wouldn’t want him to be hurt by that.”
“I remember you mentioning the private detective before. That can’t be cheap.” I blow on the cocoa.
Kannen watches my lips for a second and it causes a nervous flutter in my stomach.
He rubs the back of his neck. “Yeah, it’s not, and I’ve got to be careful with every dollar since buying the ranch.”
Rumor has it that he’s working to fix up a neglected ranch house that I love.
I love the land it sits on, too. I used to sneak away to go there in high school when things were chaotic at home. I found peace and used to pretend it was my home where there were no such things as slamming doors followed by my mother crying well into the night.
“There were some better options for sale. What made you decide to buy one that needs so much work?”
“I have my reasons,” he says, still watching me closely.
And for one breath holding moment, I imagine I see a family chasing fireflies and laughter filled nights in his eyes. I see simple country mornings and blue skies. I see happiness and peace. Not literally seeing but like I’m catching a glimpse of his dream.
I once had that dream, too. Family. Happily ever after. Peace. And I have to look away from his gaze because seeing the longing for it in his eyes makes my heart ache for him. I hope he’s one of the lucky ones and his dreams come true.
“What’s on the list after signing up the vendors?” he asks, still watching me intently like I fascinate him.
“Finding a group to perform for the live music show.”
“Then?”
I scan Miss Ethel’s notes but can’t find what I’m looking for. “I thought I saw it right here.” I flip through them.
Kannen stands and walks around to my side. Leaning close, with his palm on the table, he reads over my shoulder. I close my eyes for a second to drink in his nearness and the scent of his cologne. It’s warm and sensual. I press my hand to my forehead.
“Headache?”
“No, just some tension.” Mainly because his cock is at eye level and I’m coming down with a worsening case of wanting that.
“Where?”
“In my shoulders,” I lie.
“Want me to massage them?” he asks quietly.
Yes, I do and that’s not all I want you to massage. I’m going to tell him no. I should tell him no. “That’d be great,” I say.
His hands are big and warm as they press gently down on my shoulders. His fingers make magic on my skin. I bow my head and a soft moan escapes my lips.
He stills. “Did I hurt you?”
“Not at all.” Is that croak my voice? It sounded like I swallowed a bullfrog.
He resumes the massage, moving to the edge of my shoulders. I lean my head back and close my eyes for a second. When I open them, he’s looking down at me.
I wet my lips and he runs his hands down the sides of my arms.
“Good?” His voice is huskier than before.
Good? Not by a long shot. Heat curls between my legs and I’m sitting here in soaked panties wishing I had the courage to stand up. Wishing I could press my lips to his and let that lead to our bodies sliding heatedly over each other. But I know better.
Exactly, my brain informs me while recalling the pain I went through.
“Your lipstick is smudged,” he says.
“It happens when I bite my lips.” And drool over you.
He moves to stand beside me and lifts his hand. Slowly. Carefully, like he’s weighing my reaction. Then he puts his thumb on the side of my mouth, swiping away the smudge. Swiping away my common sense.
Just do him, my body says. Do him and walk away. No ties.
I stand abruptly, shoving my chair away with the backs of my legs.
I’m on fire. I need him to fill the empty space between my legs.
He moves a step closer or hell, maybe it was me, but our bodies brush. His hand settles on my waist, his fingers curling in, holding me possessively.
And my phone rings. Dammit. I scramble to answer, then turn to Kannen after the call ends. “It’s Miss Ethel. She just pulled into the lot and will be here in a minute.”
I glance at the front of his jeans. There’s clear evidence he wants me.
He glances at my T-shirt where my nipples are announcing their presence. It’s clear evidence I want him.
Kannen quickly takes a seat while I open the door and then move out of the way to wave Miss Ethel in.
“Oh no, darling, I don’t need to come in. I just wanted to make sure I returned these. I don’t have any use for them. Wish I did, but that ship doesn’t leave the dock anymore.”
I hold out my hand, and she puts a load of condom packets into it.
“I took my wallet out at the doctor’s office and a slew of them fell at my feet. The whole waiting room saw.”
“Oh no. I’m so sorry.”
“Sorry? Don’t be. I laughed my ass off.” She chuckles while recounting, “That old biddy Louise was there, and she gasped so hard she damn near swallowed her dentures. Now she’s telling anyone who’ll listen that I’ve got a sausage addiction and what a shame it is at my age.
I’m thinking of buying a miniskirt, bending over, and shaking my wobbly ass in front of her. ”
I laugh because I wouldn’t put it past Miss Ethel to do exactly that.
“Anyway, hon, I’m just returning your property. I’m sure you’ll find use for them.” She winks, then heads back to her car.
I shut the door, then walk over to the table and drop the condoms in the center. They skitter across it with a couple coming to rest in front of Kannen.
He grins. “Well, darlin’, that’s quite the invitation.”