38. Sarah
38
SARAH
I left Glazer Ville before anyone woke up.
Peter told me there wasn't any time to waste after I gave in to his blackmail. I still don't know how he found out about me and Kyle or if he really would make good on his threat, but I'm not about to wait around and find out.
Not at the expense of my daughter.
He's right, anyway.
Olivia is more important than a child I haven't birthed yet. At least that's what I tell myself as I enter my car and drive away around five in the morning.
I glance at the mansion and imagine Ian on his front porch, but he's not there.
I want a reason to stop him, to tell him I didn't mean a word of what I said to him last night.
But I didn’t.
Because even though I didn't plan those words, I'm starting to believe them.
How would my life have been if he’d never left? If he'd stayed and loved me like I did him, would Olivia be his?
It's not something I can be sure about. And I don't want to imagine a life without my daughter in it. It'd be a blank world, one where I have nothing to live for. She's been my lifeline for so long, and all I do is to give her the best life ever. And to imagine I would never have it if I hadn't met Kyle?
Nah.
This isn't Ian's fault. It isn't even mine. Well, not really, right?
I shouldn't be blamed for wanting to love and be loved. And Kyle, while he may be many things, a terrible lover wasn't one of them. That man loved me. Maybe not enough to come after me when I ran away, but I know he loved me.
And maybe if he hadn't turned out to be who he was, maybe I'd still be with him. Maybe I never would have met Ian again. Maybe I wouldn't be pregnant, and Peter wouldn’t have been able to blackmail me.
A life where I never get to see Ian again. Could I really be happy about that?
While things with him haven't exactly been perfect, it's been beautiful. Love with Ian is the kind of love every girl ought to experience. Even if not forever, maybe once in a lifetime. Something to look back on and smile.
I love him, don't I?
Fuck me.
I'm in love with Ian, and I'm about to go kill his child. I will never forgive myself for this.
I need a way out of this whole mess. A solution that won't harm either Olivia or this new life inside of me. Something has to be done.
I'm tired to the bone by the time I finally arrive at the hospital. It's noon. But there's a small silver lining in the whole situation: there's no paparazzi around.
Trying to make myself look as presentable as I can after a long drive, I get out of my car and walk inside the hospital.
I know where Neville’s room is, at least where it was, and taking a chance that he hasn’t been switched, I venture toward the unit.
Opening the door when I'm in front of his room, I peep in.
Yup, he's still there.
He looks like someone who's ready to die. If my heart wasn't radiating with hate toward him and his son, maybe I would pity him.
His eyes open as I enter, a faint smile touching his face as he sees me.
“Mabel,” he whispers. I freeze in my tracks. He just called me Mabel. That's my mother's name, not mine.
“I'm so glad you came to see me. Please come close. I want to apologize for how horribly I've treated you and our butterfly.”
Is this a joke?
Is this some prank being pulled to make me feel horrible?
The door opens behind me, and I glance over to see Peter. He smiles when he sees me.
“Sarah, I'm so glad you're here,” he says, stepping closer to hug me. I step out of his hug.
He's delusional if he thinks I'm going to let him anywhere close to me after what he did last night and what he's making me do right now.
He lets his hands fall, a grim look replacing the once radiant smile on his face. I hate that we have a similar look on our face when we're sad.
“I understand how you feel about me right now. But I promise you, I wouldn't be doing this if there was any other way. You're family, and I'm going to make it up to you. You'll have another child again, I promise.”
I want to smack him across the face so badly my palm itches.
How dare he say something like this to me?
I'll have another child again, but not this one inside me?
Bastard.
“Mabel.” Neville speaks again, drawing our attention back to him. I glance at him, unsure of what to make of his apparent confusion.
Stepping toward him, Peter takes one of his hands into his own.
“Pop, this isn't Mabel. This is Sarah, your daughter. Sarah's going to save you. You'll be fine soon.”
“Sarah? Sweetheart? I'm so happy to see you. Thank you for doing this,” Neville speaks weakly from his position. All I can do is stare at him in bewilderment.
Has he really become this much worse?
I don't know whether to feel sorry or sad for him.
I sit down and leave them to their clearly intimate conversation. Soon, Peter moves away and comes to my front.
“I'll inform the doctor you're around so they can start preparing him for surgery.”
I nod.
He remains standing, clearly still having something to say, but I look away from him.
We're long past speaking now.
As he leaves, I try to busy myself with thoughts of a better future. One where I don't have an estranged father dying and a crazy stepbrother blackmailing me into saving him at the risk of his potential niece or nephew’s life.
How did my life get so degenerated?
Once there was a time where I could have sworn all was well with me and there was hope for a better future. But now? I just don't know.
As if prompted by my troubled thoughts, I start to hear sounds of commotion outside the room’s door. Peter opens the door in that moment, and I watch him go from standing one second to flying through the air the next, before he lands at the feet of his father's bed, passed out.
What the hell?
Shooting upright, I start to move towards him, but I'm halted in my tracks at the sound of the last voice I expect to hear.
“Step away from him if you don't want to end up like him.”
I freeze and slowly turn around to face the owner of that voice.
Oh my God.
“What are you doing here?” I choke out.
“Stopping this nonsense from happening,” he says determinedly and walks past me to gather a now unconscious Peter into his arms.
All I can do is gape at him in confusion, unsure of what to make of the current situation.
He looks nothing like the man I know. He's not acting like him, either.
Dressed in black pants paired with a gray hoodie, Ian looks like a criminal, especially with the deadly look on his face.
What does he think he's doing?
“Ian,” I call his name, hoping to talk some sense into his head.
He doesn't answer me, just picks up Peter, and starts to walk to the door. I quickly stand in front of the door to block his path.
“Get out of my way,” he snaps at me in a cold voice. I flinch and then quickly gather myself. Stepbrother or not, I can't let him take Peter away.
“No. Tell me where you're taking him first.”
“Where I'll be taking you too if you don't step out of my way.”
“What?” I blurt out.
Why is he suddenly acting like a criminal?
Neville is a blubbering mess where he is on the bed. I try to make sense of the whole situation. He was in the mansion when I left. There’s no way he followed without me noticing. Maybe he took a flight?
I know he said he was coming with me last night ,but honestly, I thought it was just to talk me out of this, which clearly didn't work.
Why is he acting unlike himself then, knocking people out and threatening to take me with him? To where?
“Ian, what is going on?”
He groans, shifts Peter's weight from his left shoulder to the right, and then motions at me.
“Step away from the door or I'll make you.”
I've never heard him sound as deadly as he does now. Scared, I move away from the door, still confused, and watch him walk out.
Down the hall, he is approached by some of the hospital’s guards, and he uses Peter as a human shield, acting like he's going to kill him if they try to come near him. All I can do is continue looking at him as he walks away.
What on earth got into him?