Chapter Twenty One #3
“You’re right.” My voice doesn’t sound like my own.
I want to steal him—then nothing will touch him again.
“It’s fucked that I never told you how strong you were back then.
I should have. I never imagined… I didn’t understand the depths of it.
Of what you live with. But I’ll tell you now.
” I slide my palm over his cheek—feeling the burn of his skin on mine and I know that it means I love him and I’m meant to be with him forever—even if I never will be.
“You’re so incredibly strong, Button. Seriously.
I can’t even imagine what that pain feels like, but from what I can conjure, I feel horrible.
You’re a better man than me. I’m so sorry. ”
Benjamin’s eyes are watering, but his tears don’t fall, he doesn’t cry. I wonder if after last night—after the day he’s had—if he even can.
“Aaron.” He’s trembling. I know that voice, that look, that flush of his skin. “Just one?” Fuck. Begging again—just like in the bathroom at Cam’s. And just like that night, I doubt he’ll only take just one.
I’m not sure what’s appropriate after the conversation we’ve been having—what would invalidate what I’ve said or diminish the sincerity of this moment. I don’t want to push too hard. But I’d give him anything. I want to give him everything.
“It’s okay.” Benjamin whispers, leaning up from where he was resting back on his palms. I’m still leaning over him. I can feel his breath.
It’s been so long since I’ve felt his lips—tasted him. What comes next? What happens to me then?
Fuck it. I grab his face by both cheeks, holding him still. He seems to think I’m denying him at first—lips pouting and brows furrowing. Before he can speak, I lick across the seam of his lips slowly—enjoying his gasp, how his lips part and allow me to dip a little inside as well.
It’s been so fucking long.
I bite his jaw, his earlobe, his Adam’s apple.
He’s purring under me, every bit the little kitten he is.
His hair is dangling with his head at this angle—falling back from his face and giving me a complete view of his strong cheekbones, his golden brows.
I take my time to lick those as well. I want to fucking devour him.
My lips attack him. I’m swallowing every sound he makes—digesting it and sending it straight to my cock. My tongue slides against his—over his teeth, the roof of his mouth, the insides of his cheeks. He pulls away.
“Aaron.” He’s panting, trying to pull in the air I’ve stolen from him. “You’re eating me.”
“Ah—fuck. Yeah, yeah I am, baby.” I suck his tongue into my mouth and he’s on me in an instant, shoving me onto my ass and straddling my thighs.
I nip his bottom lip—taste his blood. Oops.
“Sorry.” He looks down at me, holding my face in his hands.
Blood collects on the wound and slips free from his lip.
“God, I’ve waited. So long. So patient. I don’t care if I bleed.” My cock jumps, hands tightening on his waist. “I’ve been good—really.” He’s rolling his hips down, rubbing against me. So needy, so desperate.
“Have you?”
“Yes! I didn’t take what I wanted. I didn’t push. I spared you—just like you asked.”
I think I might die right here in the grass while Benjamin fucks himself on me. I hope he uses my corpse as a human dildo so my ghost can watch him ride me.
I grab his hips—stopping his motion. He tries to move again but isn’t strong enough to break free. Huffing out a breath, he glares at me.
“Really? I’m pretty sure you’ve actually been pretty bad, Button. Running around Lancaster causing trouble just because I wasn’t there to spank you when you got caught.” Benjamin’s eyes widen comically, hands sliding to rest on my shoulders.
“Well….”
“See. You also went and teased me any chance you got. Flaunting yourself in front of me. Trying to get me to look—to crack. Hm? Isn’t that why you wore those shorts on move-in day?
To remind me of what I claimed?” He shivers—hard.
“Or why you wore that little silky button-up half undone—that chain around your neck for everyone to see? You were telling me something, Benjamin. You were working for it, teasing me.”
I take a hand off of his hip and bring it to his nipple—finally able to clamp down on the bar pushed through there.
“Ahh.” We moan at the same time, Benjamin’s head falling back, his thighs tensing on either side of me, enough for the bites on my side to sting.
“And you got these and didn’t tell me about it. Why?” He slowly looks back down at me—lips parted, pupils so big you’d think he’s high.
“I didn’t think it’d be appropriate.” The lie makes me laugh, so he tries again.
“Because I wanted you to touch them and I felt guilty. If I didn’t tell you—then I didn’t have to imagine it every time you looked at them.
” I hard-pinch at the nipple I have between my thumb and index finger.
His hips are trying to move again and he’s whining at the lack of friction—at the sting on his chest.
“Why did you get them?” Benjamin moans a low, long sound—eyes closing and his chin dropping to his chest.
“Don’t ask me.” He begs.
Well—with that reaction, how can a man not?
“Now.”
“I saw you once. A long time ago. I’d come back early from Felix’s band practice and went to say hi to you.
” Oh no. I have a very bad feeling this is going to be pretty embarrassing for me.
“I opened the bathroom door but before I opened it all the way I saw you at your desk on your laptop. So, I paused.” He stops there—edging me with my own embarrassing middle-school masturbation story.
I drag his hips down onto me once—hard. He mewls, trying to find more.
“And you watched?”
“No—I couldn’t really see what you were doing.
But I could hear you. I wasn’t even registering the sound of the porn.
Just you.” If my dick gets any harder, I will cry like a baby.
“And so, at twelve years old I got my first hard-on for a guy.” Benjamin grins down at me. “Surprise—I think you’re hot.”
“Wait—what does this have to do with the piercings?” I ask through my laugh.
“Oh. The girl you were watching. She had them. So when I was getting my nose done, I remembered it and thought… well I don’t know what I thought but it was about you.
And I think they’re hot.” I rest my forehead on his chest, running my hands up his sides.
As soon as my hand leaves his hip, he’s rolling himself against me.
“You fucking kill me.”
“It was a little bad of me. When I showed Drew, he looked at me like I was crazy—asking why I would pierce them. I don’t really think he meant anything by it—he liked them well enough—but it kind of felt like he was calling me a whore.
” He laughs nervously. I grind up against him, soaking in his little yelp.
“You are not a whore, Benjamin. Even if Drew or your father make you think you are.” I feel his deep, shaky intake of air against my forehead.
“Well anyway—I told him that I thought they were hot and nothing else. It was nice because I didn’t have to lie and shitty because I knew doing it was just as bad.”
Alright, time to turn this conversation back around. I lean back—stopping his hips once again—grinning up at his childish glare.
“So, you think teasing me—publicly marking yourself with my things when I can’t even touch you—and piercing your nipples just so you could think of me touching you is being really good?”
Benjamin clearly doesn’t think that with his evil little grin and wandering hands. His golden hair is framing his face, and his cheeks are so beautifully flushed that he looks like an angel.
But then he goes and opens his filthy mouth.
“If it’s not—will you punish me?” God. Ah, goddamnit. I let go of him, leaning back onto my elbows and staring up at him.
“I’ll give you a ten-second head start, Benjamin. Don’t let me catch you.” I watch his hazel eyes darken to a shade I’ve never seen before. I watch as he puts a hand on my chest—sitting up straight where he straddles me—looking down at me like he wants me to bite him or fuck him or maybe both.
“Will it feel good?” I shrug.
“Maybe.”
“Will it hurt?”
“At least a little.” I’m honest—because if he wants to be punished at the very least, he’ll be spanked. How far we go is up to his comfort and his reactions.
Benjamin grins.
“One,” I start—and he’s off like a rocket. Away from me, the bike, the road. I give him his promised seconds—watching his long legs and firm little ass as he runs. Then, I sprint after him.
He has absolutely nowhere to go in this empty grass field in the middle of nowhere—yet he’s running like a serial killer is chasing him. All the better for when I get my hands on him.
As the athletically superior being I’m already on his heels, close enough to hear him breathing.
Then—like all stupid horror-movie protagonists—he looks over his shoulder, which reduces his speed just a bit.
He’s grinning when he does—face flushed, his hair flying around his head.
When he sees I’m right there on him he yelps, one of those fucking sun smiles taking over his face, and he speeds up.
Really? He’s that happy to be hunted by me? Fuck—that’s hot.
Too bad for him he already made the mistake of turning around once—because now I’ve caught up to him.
Benjamin yelps when I snatch him up by the waist in one arm—almost tripping with the force it takes to stop us both. As soon as I’m sure we’re not going down—I pull the arm that has Benjamin draped over it out in front of me and use my other hand to come down and slap his ass. Hard.
His yelp turns into a loud—deep groan, his body going limp over my arm, panting.
“Had enough?” I ask him, trying to gauge his comfort, his desire. He spits on the ground in front of him.
“I’m not a little kid, Aaron. A little spank isn’t going to break me.” He’s antagonizing me, I know he is. And I’m thanking every one of my lucky stars; my dreams are coming true.