61
Tania Tazzlefoot was naked.
But she was naked for a reason. She was fighting slimes.
Slimes exploded when they died. Their gelatinous bodies bursting to fling thick acidic goop in all directions. Goop which could eat through precious clothing. It was better not to wear any.
It could eat through skin, too, but golemskin was remarkably resilient.
Selma Standpoint was naked, too.
She was also naked for a reason.
She was fighting slimes alongside Tania.
The two golems were slick with slime which ran down their bodies, sliding down their breasts, bellies, and thighs.
“Look at me, Milo,” Selma called, her voice high with energy. “Look at me!”
Milo was on his feet, a mana rifle to his shoulder, peering down the sight at a slime a few feet in front of her. He pulled the trigger, and a bolt of raw mana blasted through the thick rubbery shell and caused another explosion of slime which spattered the two golems.
Tania let out a surprised squeak. “Hey! Watch where you’re shooting!”
“Sorry,” he called back, shucking the clip and pulling another from his belt.
He didn’t sound sorry.
On her knee beside him, Mila Moontouch had a rifle aimed at another slime.
Mila was the name the golem had chosen after discarding the name Fulka Fenricksurge. She had also discarded her old face and hair. She was still as slim as she’d been when she was Fulka, but she’d added some more padding in her essential places.
Basically, bigger breasts and a rounder bottom.
Her hair was now a coppery brown, and she had pulled it up into two tight buns to keep it from falling into her eyes.
Being so far from the action, she had no need to be naked.
But she was naked.
For a reason.
That reason being that if the other two were going to be naked in front of him, she felt she should too.
She pulled the trigger, and another slime exploded.
Tania didn’t notice the fresh shower of acidic slime as she was drilling a dagger into another while Selma used her fists to punch through a few more in quick succession.
The loud pops kept coming, echoing through the cave tunnel. The slimes were phosphorescent. Under their feet, a steaming river of pale glowing sludge was trickling towards Milo and Mila.
“This is ridiculous,” Milo muttered. “They keep coming.”
Mila snapped another clip in place and hefted her rifle with a shrug. “They can handle it.”
He nodded, patting his belt.
He still had a dozen or so clips remaining. Plus a grenade he didn’t want to use just yet.
He was saving it for a reason.
Tania and Selma went through the wave of slimes with patient force. This tunnel was marked on Milo’s map as a place most students should avoid. It was meant as a challenge for pyromancers who were rated 9 and above. Any other mage was told to avoid it.
It was meant to be a place to get some practical experience casting fire walls.
But Tania still preferred a complete run and wanted to clear it out anyway.
She giggled as she dived into one of the slimes and felt it pop around her. It felt fizzy on her golemskin as the acid tried in vain to burn through it.
Selma took a deep breath.
She lifted her arm.
And then she charged like a lunatic, howling at Milo to look at her.
She punched through one slime without pausing, barreled into the next and punched. She kept going. Mowing them down with aggressive raw power.
He watched, feeling a vague sense of horror as his creations prove that magic was inefficient and probably inferior.
As a clocker, he liked that idea. It appealed to him.
But as a human, it was shocking.
“What are ya doing, ya ditzy dame?” Tania shouted after her. “We’re supposed ta stick together!”
“Sorry!” Selma shouted over her shoulder without stopping. She wound up and punched another slime. “I couldn’t help it!”
“Tch.” Tania shook her head. “You’re half-cut, ain’t ya?”
Milo watched Selma decimate the slimes. His eyes couldn’t help but be drawn to where he knew they shouldn’t.
But he’d begun to suspect she was consciously positioning herself into poses designed to give him the most optimal view of her most intimate places.
His eyes followed her as she twirled to a halt with the explosive death of the final slime.
Legs apart.
Arms up and ready with fingers balled into fists.
Head held high and proud despite the rivers of slippery goo sliding down her pale smooth skin.
She looked beautiful. Heroic. And strong.
But every line, angle, and curve seemed to lead his eyes to her crotch.
The grin on her face told him he was right.
It was deliberate.
He scowled at Selma. “Will you stop that?”
“Nope.”
Tania batted her on the side of the head. “Stop being such a tramp.”
“What? You do it all the time!”
“That’s different,” she sniffed. “I’m a lady. Ain’t I a lady, Milo?”
“Sure.”
“See? Now, stand up properly. You’ll do your spine in.”
“That’s fine. Milo can fix it.” Selma turned her grin on him again. “Actually, I think I have a problem with some of my gears. Can you help tighten them later? Down here?”
That earned another thwap on the head.
And some yelling.
But Milo noticed that while yelling at Selma, Tania had positioned herself so her ass was pointed at him.
She looked down at Mila, who glanced back up at him and shrugged.
“We’re going to be here forever,” he sighed.
Standing upright, Mila was a bit more shy about what she revealed. She instead focused on her rifle, carefully tweaking the sight.
Not that it needed it.
She was just nervous. She’d been nervous around him since she’d returned from her mission working undercover as Fergus’ confidant.
Finally, Selma and Tania were satisfied they’d shown enough skin to prove they had it, and looked ready to continue.
Tania kicked Selma in the ass and sent the other golem staggering towards the end of the tunnel. “Move that trashy can of yours, sister!”
“Trashy? It’s not trashy! It’s the best. Just ask Milo. He made it.”
Milo ignored them. He had the map out and was checking it.
The end of the tunnel should lead to a wide open cave room. In there should be a lake. After killing this wave of slimes, a massive slime should have spawned. She was the Slime Mother. And she was going to be in an enraged state.
That’s what his grenade was for.
He glanced at Mila. “You ready?”
She patted the small brace of grenades on a belt around her hips. “Ready,” she said with a nod.
He smiled at her, glad that one of his golems was being professional.
Her answering smile was positively infectious. It lit up her face and eyes.
And then she was off, darting ahead to catch up with the other two.
“He smiled at me!” Mila squealed.
Tania patted her head before shooting Milo a mischievous grin. “Good job, sister.”
He scratched his head, not knowing what was going on.
But he knew something was.
It had been six months since the issue with Paddstone. And in that six months, the dynamic between them all was shifting. He’d expected to see more competition between Mila and Tania. The two had seemed feisty in their fake fight in front of Fergus.
But after getting her new face and name, Mila became almost meek. She constantly hid herself from Milo. While in the same room.
He could be working in the workshop and then drag a seat out from under his workbench only to find Mila crouched down under it, too. Then she’d dart away with a squeal of terror as though afraid he was going to scold her.
Then this dungeon had come along.
And Tania seemed to be using their nudity for something. It was a conspiracy against him, and they were all in on it.
He plodded along behind the three whispering golems, feeling more and more suspicious. What were they planning?
And why should it bother him?
They were just constructs, weren’t they?
What did he care what they did so long as they followed orders?
Were they really any different to clocks at the end of the day? Intricate clocks, for sure. But their bodies were gears, levers, and pullies buried in wires and other complex mechanical constructs.
They weren’t human.
Selma glanced back at him and giggled.
Not human, he reminded himself again.
It was something he was having to tell himself a lot lately as it was getting easy to forget.
They waited for him to catch up at the tunnel’s end.
He peered out and saw the map was right. The large cavern had a high ceiling with countless stalactites dangling like jagged fangs. And beneath that was a glowing lake of slime.
And in the middle was a slime as big as a house.
It wobbled angrily, emitting a keening moan which caused the lake’s thick surface to vibrate. Waves of slime crashed against the shore, steaming as they soaked the ground.
He glanced at Mila, who blushed red.
Did she consciously choose to do that? Or was it something her Machine Intelligence Matrix did without her thinking?
“I can do it, Milo,” she said with determination. “Let me do it!”
He stared at her.
What was driving her determination?
Was it really the machine in her head?
Or was there something more to them that he didn’t understand.
They weren’t human.
Weren’t human.
“Please, Milo?”
He nodded. “Sure,” he said. “You can do it.”
Tania patted Mila’s head and smirked at her. “Told you he’d let you. Now, get down there and teach that slimy old kluck not to mooch around in our dungeon!”
“Yeah!” Selma held up her fist, which Mila bumped with her own. “It’s splattering time!”
“I can do it,” Mila said with a giddy grin. Then, eyes wide, she took a step towards the slime before looking back at him. “I can do it!”
It took two grenades and a shot with the mana rifle, but she did do it.
Covered in slime from head to toe, she returned with a triumphant smile.
Milo nodded at her.
“Look at ya!” Tania cried happily as Selma slapped Mila on the back. “Ain’t you the bee’s knees in blowing stuff up? Ain’t that right, Milo?”
“Yeah,” he said, trying to sound encouraging. But he didn’t really know what to say. He settled on a slightly gruff; “Good job.”
Mila giggled.
“Now do the thing,” Selma said in a stage whisper.
“Really?”
“Yeah, go on! He likes it.”
Mila flicked her eyes nervously to him.
Then she turned slightly. It wasn’t much. But somehow she managed to pose herself in a way that made his ears turn bright red and his face warm as a wave of embarrassment swept over him.
“Alright alright,” he growled as the three golems broke into giggles. “That’s enough.”
“Tsk,” Tania said, walking up to him and poking him in the chest. “It’ll never be enough, buster. You’re our engineer, remember?”
“Yeah. I remember.”
She flicked her finger up from his chest to flick his chin up. “Don’t forget it, then.”
Not human, he told himself.
Not human.
But he still felt something stirring in his heart.
He looked down at his feet and sighed.
“I need a holiday.”