50. Brooke
50
***Brooke***
T rue to my word, I went to Logan’s house the next morning. It was a lot harder than going to Finn’s apartment. My stomach was twisted with anxiety and I tried to talk myself out of going a couple dozen times. I made myself, though. I wasn’t leaving parts of myself behind anymore.
Logan opened the door when I knocked, a hopeful look on his face. “Little bunny.”
I pushed past him, Lucy at my heels. “I’m not your little bunny. I just came to get my things.”
“Hey, stop. Just talk to me for a second. Please.”
I swung around to glare at him. “I begged you for a chance to talk last week. Do you remember how you treated me?”
His head dropped. “Yes. I’m sorry, Brooke. I was an asshole. I-”
“I can’t do this with you right now. Maybe ever.” I hurried upstairs and cringed when Colt came out of his room, eyes locked on me.
“We’re not going to let you go.” He stood in my doorway as I packed. “We messed up. We were horrible. Consider us selfish, too, because we’re not giving you up.”
I stopped just before shoving the shirt he’d let me wear the first night I’d arrived back in town. Gripping it tight, I slowly brought it up to my nose and smelled it. It still smelled like him somehow. I dropped it on the bed and zipped up my bag. “A few days ago, that would’ve been the best thing I’d ever heard.”
“And now?”
“And now I’ve got a dog to raise and I’m trying to be a good role model. What kind of dog mom would I be if I showed Lucy that it’s okay to accept a shitty apology without any real weight behind it just because you love someone? He deserves better and so do I.”
“Brooke, please. Stay so we can talk. You deserve so much more than a shitty apology but I have to start somewhere.” He came closer but I threw my bag over my shoulder and hurried out of the room. “I love you! I love you, Brooke. Doesn’t that mean something to you? Don’t leave.”
I shot him a dark look. “Like it meant something to you when I said it last week?”
Noah came out of his room, dark bags under his eyes. He opened his mouth to say something but I couldn’t take anything else.
“You wanted me gone. I’m gone.” Lucy kept up with me as I raced down the steps and out of the house. I didn’t look back. I couldn’t. It was killing me to walk away from them but I couldn’t stop thinking about how they’d ignored me while I poured my guts out to them.
Lucy brushed his head under my hand as we walked and I let out a pitiful whimper. Stroking his head, I took a deep breath and tipped my chin higher. I wasn’t going to break down on the side of the street and have everyone think I’m just as crazy as my mom and aunt, even if maybe I was. I marched all the way back to Mom’s house and dropped my bags on the front porch before collapsing on her steps.
“Well?” Mom was sitting on her porch swing, gently swinging back and forth. “I take it that didn’t go well.”
I wrapped my arm around Lucy and sighed. “They’re acting like they’re sorry but I don’t believe them. Words are easy. Anyone can apologize.”
“You want action?” Mom laughed. “You always were a little dramatic. In the best way. If you need more, wait for more, baby. You deserve everything and then some.”
I laid back on the porch and Lucy immediately curled up next to me and rested his chin on my forehead. He was the best weighted blanket I could’ve ever wished for, even if he smelled a little. “I don’t know what I want or deserve anymore. I don’t know if I ever did.”
“Figure it out because I talked to your aunt earlier and she’s got big news for you.” Mom’s voice was full of happiness and that scared the shit out of me.
“What is it?”
“Don’t you have an appointment at the vet?”
I swore and gently pushed Lucy’s head away so I could stand up. “I’m not ready for big news right now.”
“Then I suggest you avoid your aunt.”
I could do that. I took Lucy to the vet and after having to lure him inside with a stick of beef jerky, low sodium, I managed to get him into an exam room where he became dead weight and had to be pulled around like a big drunk guy. While he got a bath and his nails clipped, I talked with Dr. White about the mural she wanted. Since Lucy was acting like the bath was made of holy water and he really was the devil, we decided I’d start the mural after he calmed down for a few days.
When we got back to Mom’s later that day, he refused to come inside with me and just stared at me with an attitude for the rest of the day. When he did finally come inside and climb into bed with me, I was near tears, thinking I’d made him hate me. He just cuddled into my side and heaved out a giant sigh before letting out a fart and rolling onto his back.
“Thanks, Lucy.”
He grunted, kicked me, and farted again before falling into a deep enough sleep to start snoring. It was so loud that I heard Mom shouting from her room after half an hour.
“If those boys don’t fix this and get you and that demon dog out of my house soon, I’m going to murder them!”