Chapter 42
CHAPTER 42
“For only being four days post-op, you’re healing at a remarkable rate,” my doctor said after examining my wound. “You’ve no sign of infection, and your liver panel is perfect. I think tomorrow, if you have a good night, we’re going to discharge you.”
Mom leaned forward in the chair. “We’ve hired a team of private round-the-clock nurses.”
The doctor glanced at me, unable to hide the fact that he thought she was going overboard. “That’s not a bad idea for the first day or two. A nurse can help you change your bandages and help you manage any pain, although, at the rate you are healing, you’re going to be fine.”
“We’ve also hired a full security team,” she added.
“Why?” I asked, baffled.
“Porter insisted on it, but your father agreed.”
I observed my mom. She looked disheveled and tired.
I waited until the doctor walked out before I asked my mom, “Are you okay?”
“It’s been a strain. Your father feels horribly guilty.”
“This isn’t Dad’s fault. ”
“He knows you tried to talk to him. He feels terrible that he didn’t make time for you.”
“I don’t blame him.”
She shook her head. “If it wasn’t for Porter, I simply don’t know how we’d have coped. That man has been an absolute rock.”
You mean the man who hasn’t come by to see me yet?
It confused me that Porter was still very much on the scene, working with my parents, planning my life for when I got out of the hospital, but except for that first night that he climbed into bed with me, I hadn’t seen him.
When I wasn’t sleeping or reassuring my parents, I spent the rest of my time thinking about him. My phone call with him after I had been stabbed was a bit fuzzy, but I was reasonably certain that I had confessed my feelings to him.
And I recalled him being pretty upset over me getting attacked, which could possibly be interpreted as him caring a bit for me, but now he was avoiding me. How many awful moments had I thrust him into?
Anyone else would have disappeared a long time ago, yet he continued to rise to the occasion. I couldn’t figure out if that was because he cared or if he was simply a man of exceptional character.
Mom interrupted my thoughts. “Your apartment is much too small for all the staff, and I was hoping to bring you home to our place, but Porter made alternative arrangements.”
“Oh?”
“Emily has offered you use of her penthouse until you make a full recovery.”
Thank fuck.
“Mom, you should go home and get some rest.”
She fought tears and shook her head. “Sorry.”
“Mom, it’s okay to cry.”
“Porter said under no circumstances are we to upset you or bother you.”
“It doesn’t upset me if you cry. ”
She sniffed and stood. “I have to go to your apartment and supervise the team that’s moving some of your stuff over.”
“Mom, go home and rest. I can deal with that in a day or two.”
“Porter said that he didn’t want you to have to go back there until you’re fully recovered. He thought the crime scene would be too upsetting.”
“Is there anything he hasn’t taken care of?” I joked to cover up my bewilderment.
She took my question seriously. “No, I think he’s covered pretty much everything. He’s… he’s a good man, Beth.”
Why did she choose to realize that when the end felt so near?
“How are you feeling?” Dad asked, standing in front of the couch the nurse had settled me onto.
“I’m good.” I looked around the vast sitting room in Emily’s penthouse.
Roo and Mom sat on the opposite couch. Porter leaned against the wall, his arms crossed, his face devoid of expression. This was the first time I had seen Porter since I had been discharged, and he still looked as pissed as he did that first night in the hospital.
“I want to make a family announcement.” Dad cleared his throat, glancing at Porter.
I furrowed my brows. “Okay.”
“After careful consideration, I’ve decided to drop out of the race for mayor.”
I couldn’t believe it. It was not like my father to ever back down.
“Dad, I think Michael Renner is behind these attacks.”
“And that’s exactly why this is an appropriate decision. You almost died. If that isn’t reason enough, I don’t know what is.”
“We all feel that way,” Mom added.
I suddenly realized that I wanted my dad to run for mayor, and I wanted him to win. After everything that had happened, it would feel like defeat to give up now.
I struggled to find words to express myself. “Renner’s corrupt, and he’s a bully. And that’s exactly why he can’t continue as mayor,” I argued.
“I’m not willing to risk your safety.”
“And I’m not willing to be the reason you give up your dream.”
He looked conflicted. “What if something happens to you?”
“Dad, nothing is going to happen to me. This place is like Fort Knox, and you’ve hired an impressive security team.”
“And Porter is here, too,” Mom added, glancing back at Porter.
I couldn’t even process that, so I ignored Mom’s comment. “Dad, I think you’d be an amazing leader for this city. New York deserves someone like you.” Definitely not Renner.
“Porter, what do you think?” Dad deferred to Porter, who had been silently listening.
I froze, thunderstruck by how Porter seemed to be the new leader of this family.
“I’ve never quit a fight in my life,” he said, his eyes on my face.
“Please, Dad.” I turned back to my father. “I really want you to give this your all and go kick some ass.”
“Beth, language!” Mom interjected.
My mom, despite herself, couldn’t be anything but who she was. I don’t know why, but that made me so damn happy. At least some things hadn’t changed.
“Dad, it would mean the world to me.”
“You really want me to do this?”
“Yes, Dad. More than anything.”
The burden visibly lifted off his shoulders. “All right, then. Let’s win this race!”
Roo clapped with glee, and he shared a hug with my mom. The pair looked close, thicker than thieves.
“Everyone out,” Porter’s voice was low.
My parents and Roo obediently stood like good little soldiers. Mom came over and kissed me on the cheek, and then, within moments, the penthouse was quiet, and then it was only Porter and me.
Silence ticked between us. I studied him. Grey eyes studied me back.
“Hi,” I said a bit lamely.
He continued to look at me. No expression. Just that intense stare.
“You’re still pissed,” I volunteered.
“Yes.”
“Did you really get a text from my phone number telling you I’d be an hour late?”
His jaw tightened. “It was a fake SMS.”
No one since I had been in the hospital had been willing to talk to me about what was going on. I craved information, and I hoped he’d give it to me. “Do they know who it was from?”
“An untraceable burner phone.”
“Do they have any leads on who did this?”
“I’ll find him.”
That sounded ominous. I didn’t even know what to say about that.
“Why are you mad at me?”
“Why do you think?”
I hated it when tough questions got volleyed back at me. “Because I took a cab home by myself.”
“What else?”
“Because I didn’t leave the apartment when you told me to.”
“What else?”
I thought about that long and hard. I chewed on my lip. “Because I didn’t trust you?”
“Because you didn’t trust me.”
I swallowed, remembering my state of mind before my attack. I had been so convinced that Porter had been delayed because he was with Felicia. I had been certain he was leaving me .
His voice was rough. “Have I ever done anything to warrant your lack of trust?”
No. He hadn’t. Those had been my own fears, my own past prejudices coming into play.
“No.”
“If you don’t trust me, there’s no point to any of this.”
Cold fear drenched my heart. “What are you saying?”
“It’s your choice. You either completely trust me, or we don’t do this at all.”
I didn’t know if he was talking about him protecting me or if he was referencing us. I couldn’t bring myself to call this a relationship, but whatever it was, it was becoming the most important thing in my life. The thought of him walking away terrified me.
“I choose to trust you. Completely.”
He pushed himself off the wall and walked towards me. He grabbed my chin and forced me to look up at him. “Don’t ever fucking scare me like that again.”
Warmth flooded my heart. “You don’t look like you scare that easy.”
“I don’t. But when I heard your scream on the phone…”
“I fought.” Stupid tears filled my eyes as I remembered the terror of that moment.
“You fought like hell, and you survived.”
“What if he comes back?”
“I told you I’d take care of it.”
I stared up at this beautiful man. He was a master at sending mixed messages. If this was a different situation, the ambiguity of his feelings compared to how deeply I was falling would drive me to push him for answers. But under the circumstances, I felt pathetically grateful he was still around.
My mouth opened, but I snapped it shut in an instant, taken aback. At that moment, I realized I was falling in love with him.