16. Dan
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
DAN
I shuffle my deck of cards on the front porch of the beach house, perched on the railing as I wait for Ally to return from her date. The hour is closing in on midnight. The night is dark, with my father and Amabella asleep and only the inside hall light casting a dim glow where I sit. Waves roll into the shore, but their gentle sound does nothing to calm me. I grow more impatient for Ally’s return by the second, with one thing tormenting me.
That damn kiss.
No matter how much I enjoyed the way she clung to me and rubbed against my cock, the kiss was a mistake. A decision acted out of jealousy and some prior claim to Ally I convinced myself of. I drove all the way from the city to ask Ally not to go on her date. To be with me instead. Yet she still chose to leave me.
The fucking irony of history repeating itself and how I never learn.
She always runs away from me.
I’m so fucking furious with myself. I knew the moment she returned from Paris that if I didn’t play my cards right, I’d frighten her off again. And that’s exactly what I’ve done.
I check the time again. Past midnight. Ally won’t be pleased to see me waiting for her when she returns from her date. But I can’t leave without trying to fix this situation.
My shuffling grows more impatient. Surely she’s coming home. My stomach churns over the possibility that she’s gone home with Liam instead?—
Headlights appear in the distance, traveling up the long driveway. I sit up straight, my spine stiffening when a pickup truck comes into view, parking in front of the house. The engine turns off, along with the headlights, but my eyes are adjusted to the night, and I can still see inside the vehicle.
Ally and Liam talk for a minute. He makes her laugh, then my shuffling stops and I’m full of bitterness as he leans in and kisses Ally on the lips.
Kiss me again, Dan. Please. Don’t stop.
She’s clearly moved on quick.
Her kiss with Liam is long and slow. His hand bunches through Ally’s neat hair. Hair that I had my hands in only a few hours ago. Liam unbuckles his seatbelt and leans across the center console?—
She smiles and pulls back, saying something I can’t hear. Ally steps out of the truck and closes the door behind herself. The engine turns on and Liam calls out to her. “Miss you already.”
They both laugh, and she watches him return down the driveway.
As soon as Ally steps onto the veranda, her eyes flick to me, sitting on the railing, and she gasps. “Dan, you scared me.”
An awkward silence lingers between us, and I hate it. But I don’t know how to start an honest conversation about the kiss we shared tonight, not when I’m so fucking scared that this is the absolute end for us.
Her gaze drops to my hands and the tiniest smile tugs at her lips. I follow Ally’s gaze, surprised to find she’s smiling at the neon cards when there’s so much intimacy attached to them for both of us.
“I like that you still carry them with you,” she says.
“I can control myself around you, Ally. I promise. I’m sorry about earlier in your bedroom. I shouldn’t have kissed you. It won’t happen again.”
“It’s okay?—”
“It’s not okay.”
She looks at me, standing in silence with such an innocent, doe-eyed expression. There’s no shame like I expect to see. She appears to even be… happy. About what, I don’t know. The date with Liam went well, I suppose.
“I want to tell you something about my date. Can we… talk somewhere more private? Our parents could wake up and hear us. Can we sit in your car?”
My jaw clenches and I shake my head, trying to keep a level tone, but the frustration is clear. “No, Ally. I hate seeing you with him. I hate that you can be with me one minute then him the next. The worst part is I can’t even blame you for the way you act because I never should have kissed you in the first place.”
She glances at the front door, with her lips pressed into a concerned line. “Please stop saying that. You never know who could be listening.”
I sigh, tucking the deck of cards into my pocket and stepping down from my seat on the railing. “Fine. We’ll talk in my car. ”
The two of us leave the veranda and walk in silence along the driveway, across to the far side of the house where my car is parked.
We slip into the front seats and the doors shut behind us with a thud , blocking out all noise of the ocean and sheltering us in a world of tense silence and darkness, all but for the moonlight and a couple of garden lanterns. My awareness of Ally’s presence multiplies in here. Her sweet perfume fills the air. I can hear her breath, soft but fast. She’s nervous about something.
My gaze trails over her tiny body. My chest tightens by the sight of her slender legs and her cleavage in that purple dress. The way her breasts swell with each breath. Her pretty lips, parted slightly. Her eyes that are already on me. An instinct creeps over me, that being alone in this car with Ally is the last place I should be right now. Last time we were alone in here, I started talking about all kinds of inappropriate things.
Ally swivels side-on in her seat to face me with her body. “I want to talk about… us. About everything that’s happened between us. I’ve never wanted to have this conversation because there should be no us. But there is. You know how much you mean to me. I wish we weren’t family and I could be with you.”
I grip the steering wheel tight, frustration getting the best of me due to the mixed signals this girl gives. A year’s worth of unresolved anger pours out of me. “You want to talk about something real, Ally? I spent months being angry with you, hating you, for leaving the way you did. I got you accepted into an elite scholarship. I even told you I’d move to France with you if you needed support. Then you did me dirty by accepting the scholarship and leaving the country without saying goodbye. I felt like I’d been used and disposed of. How could you not even give me the decency of a goodbye after everything we’d been through? How could you return to the country and act as if our past never happened?”
“I’m sorry,” she mutters, submitting to me and lowering her gaze to her lap. “Everything was so intense between us. I’d… fallen in love with you and… I had to snap myself out of those feelings. If I said goodbye in person, I wouldn’t have left and gotten the space from you I needed. I didn’t know what else to do.”
“You broke my fucking heart, Ally. I was in love with you too.”
Her eyes dart back to me. “You were?”
“How could you not realize that?”
She watches me for a long moment with sadness in those beautiful blue eyes. “I’m sorry I hurt you so much. What we had was too intense. It still is. I went to Paris to forget about you.” She pauses, letting out a long sigh. “It didn’t work.”
“So, what’s the point of this conversation? You’re still convinced our feelings for each other are wrong.”
“I’m trying to move on by meeting other people,” she says. “I like Liam and want to keep seeing him. I had a really good time with him tonight, but overall, you ruined my date by kissing me. During every second of the date, I was thinking about you. When he kissed me at the end, I was wishing I was back in my bedroom with you and that Mom had never interrupted us. See my problem? I can’t get you out of my head.”
I let out an annoyed laugh, running my hands through my hair. “You’re describing the dilemma I face with every girl I hook up with.”
“How often do you… sleep with girls?” She treads ca refully, knowing she lost the right long ago to ask me such a personal question.
“I haven’t slept with anyone in months because you’re all I think about.”
Ally smiles to herself, matched with a look in her eyes like she’s contemplating something. A moment later, she leans into me a little closer, her voice soft and inviting. “I like the way you look at me when we’re alone, in ways a brother shouldn’t. I like how you used to let me sleep in your bed with you. How you don’t correct people when they think I’m your girlfriend.”
Ally’s hair hangs over one shoulder. She brushes it back, the movement drawing attention to her breasts. I get caught in the act of looking at her cleavage. From the way she’s talking, I hardly think she minds.
She leans even closer to my side of the car. “That first weekend when I got back from Paris, you let me sleep in your room. I did something bad in your bed that I shouldn’t have.”
My cock strains against my pants, hearing the words out of this girl’s mouth. Every inch of my skin is lit up with heat. I can’t tear my gaze away from her. This is what I live for—this side of Ally that has no shame. Yet I can’t figure out why she’s showing this sudden change in behavior.
“Tell me what you did in my bed.” My words are a low rasp.
“Exactly what you taught me to do with my fingers. I made myself feel good while imagining what you would look like when jerking off. What you’d sound like. You’re always on my mind, Dan. I came to a realization tonight. I’m thinking… The only way we can get over each other is if we have sex. ”
My blood feels like it’s boiling. I’m hard and catch Ally looking at the tent in my pants.
Before I can form an answer, she continues with her reasoning. “I know it’s wrong. But we can keep it a secret. No one will know but us if we just do it once. We can get this attraction for each other out of our systems and move on with our lives, never speaking about this moment again.”
I swallow hard and stare out the windshield, barely believing what I’m hearing. For years, the two of us worked hard to not act on this attraction between us. Since returning from Paris, Ally has been adamant nothing will happen between us. Now she’s the one, little miss perfect, suggesting we give in. She’s the one begging, all in an attempt to block out the side of her that is a freak for her stepbrother. To make herself feel normal because she’s so goddamn ashamed of who she is and what she wants.
Fuck. Is this the only way I’m ever going to have her?
After we have sex, what happens next? She gets what she wants, to move on with Liam or whoever the next guy is, all while I’m still jerking off to the thought of her because I won’t ever get Ally out of my system.
“This plan only serves your interest,” I say. “One time may be enough for you but I’m not ever getting over us.”
“You don’t know that.”
“I do.”
“Maybe once you’ve had me and the chase is over, you’ll…”
“I’ll what? Lose interest? Not going to happen.”
She sighs. “Dan, be reasonable about us. What do you expect for us, that we become a couple? No one would accept us. Our parents?—”
“I know. I feel guilt toward your mom, but I can’t live my life to please her. I’ve stopped caring what other people will think. We can keep us a secret.”
“How? We nearly got caught kissing.”
She has an answer for everything. There’s always a reason as to why we can’t be together. No matter what I say, there’s no winning with this girl. She irritates the fuck out of me with her righteousness.
Fine. We’ll do this Ally’s way, but I won’t make it easy for her. She’ll suffer. I’ll break her down. She will be mine. I won’t fucking let her get over me.
I glance back at her, keeping my calm. “You really think one time is enough for you?”
“I…” She swallows, nervous. “Yes. It has to be.”
It won’t be. But I can humor her. “I’ll agree to this on one condition. I get your first time.”
“Yes,” she says within an instant, not even thinking through my words.
Eager little virgin. So na?ve. So eager to take my dick.
I slide my tongue along my teeth, staring out the windshield again. “It’s getting late. You should go inside. I have a long drive back to the city.”
“What?” she asks with a rude shock. “We’re not going to have sex right now?”
My mouth works hard to resist the smirk tugging at it. “I’m not fucking you in the backseat of my car.”
“When do you want to do it?”
“I haven’t decided yet. Not any time soon.”
“Dan—” she groans my name. “I have a date with Liam next Saturday.”
“I’ve given my one condition. If you’re not happy with it, you’re free to back out of the deal.”
“It would feel wrong seeing him when I’ve promised myself to someone else. ”
“You two aren’t exclusive,” I point out. “Liam told you he’s available to other people. I’m sure he’s getting plenty of sex elsewhere. If he’s so into you, he’ll be happy to wait.”
“I’m trying to do the right thing and move on from you,” she argues.
Finally, I match her temperament, my voice low but harsh. “You leave me high and dry for Paris, then you leave me again tonight after begging me to kiss you. Now you’re asking me to sleep with you, not for the purpose of wanting me but to get over me?—”
“You know I want you?—”
“I’m not done talking. You’re a fucking brat, Ally. If you want me to get over you, a quickie in the back of my car isn’t the way to go. When the time comes, I’m going to enjoy your body for an entire day and night. I’m going to fuck you in every hole. Fill you with my cum till it’s dripping out of you. I am going to degrade the fuck out of your body with my dick and I won’t be gentle.”
A moan slips from Ally’s lips. Her eyes widen and her breath grows more audible. That’s my girl, turned on from my words despite not wanting to be. “My God, you’re infuriating,” she mutters, dropping her head.
“You don’t know the definition of infuriating, Ally.” I grab her chin, drawing her face toward mine. “I have a constant fucking hard-on from this whole good girl persona you show the world. The cute little dresses you wear. The pretty ribbons in your hair. Yet I’m the only one who knows beneath it all you just want to get fucked by your stepbrother. You’ve been hiding that side from me since returning to the country. I want to see the real you again. The needy girl who is a slut for me and only me.”
She stares at me in shock for the longest moment, her lips parted, her breath heavy. I’ve never spoken to her in such a harsh manner before and expect her to pull away from my hand. Instead, she launches forward, slamming her lips to mine.
My hands grip the back of Ally’s head, tangling in her hair as I match the aggression of her kiss. Needing her closer, I pull her onto my lap, grip her ass and shove her onto my cock, wishing there was no barrier of clothes between us. She moans into my mouth, kissing me harder, grinding her pussy against my erection.
“That’s it. Good girl, getting yourself off on my dick and taking what you want.”
I lean back from the kiss to soak in the image of Ally above me. It doesn’t feel real, having always wanted this ethereal creature who is constantly just out of arm’s reach. Then, the pain I felt when she vanished a year ago. I never thought I’d get her back.
Her hips roll in a consistent pattern as she works herself toward an orgasm. My Queen of Hearts.
“Look at you,” I murmur. “I want all your clothes off so I can watch you just like this.”
Ally reaches for the zip on the side of her dress, her hips moving with a little too much enthusiasm, and her ass hits the car horn.
She freezes, glancing at the house with fright. “Do you think our parents heard?”
“Perhaps. Get in the back seat so you don’t bump the horn again.”
She does as I say and climbs between the two front seats, making her way to the back. I follow her, taking the risk of us being caught. Dad and Amabella are in bed. Even if they woke from the horn, chances are they’ll go straight back to sleep.
Once I’m in the back seat, I get Ally beneath me and hook her legs around my waist. She lets out the sweetest sigh I’ve ever heard as I thrust against her. The friction sends a wave of pleasure all through my cock and to the rest of my body. I thrust again and her back bows off the seat as she moans my name. My breath shakes, hearing Ally like this and seeing what I do to her.
“When the time comes, you’re going to take my dick so well. I can tell,” I say while gliding a hand up the length of Ally’s body, savoring the sensation of her soft, warm skin beneath my palm.
She nods, tightening her legs around my waist, making my cock press firmer against her pussy. My kisses find her neck, trailing a line down her collarbone and enjoying the sounds my touch draws from her pretty lips. I tug Ally’s sleeve down her shoulder, the fabric ripping from my urgency, exposing her bra. She doesn’t seem to care about the damage to her dress. Her hands are too busy sliding beneath my shirt and exploring the planes of my torso.
I push one cup of her bra down, nearly coming in my pants when I bring her nipple into my mouth for the first time ever. She cries out my name again, her hands burrowing through my hair.
My fingers hook beneath her panties and slide them down her legs. They’re white lace and I tuck them in my pocket for later when I’m alone, all while staring down at her pussy. The inside of the car is dark, but I can still see how wet and smooth she is. I’ve never wanted anything more than to feel her wrapped around my cock right this second. There are so many things I want to do to her. Fuck her in every position. Command her. Fuck her hard , like no virgin should ever be fucked.
She reaches for my fly, but I grasp her wrist. “If I don’t keep it in my pants, I’ll end up fucking you. And I told you not tonight.” I lower her wrist, guiding her hand between her legs. “I want to see you touch yourself. It’s been so long since I’ve watched you please yourself and I’ve missed the sight.”
She moans. I look down and realize she’s already rubbing her clit. Pre-cum leaks from my dick.
“Such a needy little thing, aren’t you?” I say, unable to tear my gaze from between her legs.
“This is what you’ve turned me into.”
“No, this is who you’ve always been and I fucking love it.”
She rubs herself faster, moaning softly. The wet sounds of Ally’s hand moving against her pussy fills the car. Her fingers glide up and down, alternating between teasing her clit and plunging into her opening. There’s a rhythmic tension in her muscles, tightening and releasing to build an orgasm.
“You still do it just like I taught you. You’ve gotten better.”
She gives another desperate nod, then her head tilts back with pleasure. “I do this most days, thinking about you.”
My dick throbs, begging to be inside her. “Take your clothes off. I want to see all of you.”
Ally pulls the dress over her head and unclasps her bra. I’m groaning at the sight of her naked body, splayed out on my car seat as she continues touching herself. My hands grasp onto the headrests either side of us, knowing if I touch any part of Ally’s body, I’ll cave in, we’ll have sex, and we’ll be over for good. But I can’t stop myself from imagining her wet pussy clenched around me, milking my cock as I thrust into her.
“Dan,” she pants as her free hand plays with her peaked nipples. Her hips arch off the seat, her breasts rising and falling with the intensity of her arousal. “You make this feel too good.”
“I’m not even touching you. Just wait till you’re coming on my cock.”
Ally’s eyes roll back into her head and her breathing becomes more ragged. She’s working herself toward the edge. Her legs tremble. I can see the beads of sweat on her forehead, the flush of her skin, and the way her body is begging for release.
“You’re about to come, aren’t you?”
“Yes.” She winces.
This is the moment I’ve waited for, but something greedy takes over me. I love that I’m the only one who has ever seen this side of Ally. Her upcoming date with Liam enters my mind, and jealousy rages through me at the thought of Ally acting like this for him. Ally promised me her virginity, but there are other ways to engage in sex on her date, and I can’t stand the thought of her being with anyone but me.
Her moans grow louder, and I know she’s right on the brink of an intense climax. I steal the orgasm from her, gripping both her wrists and pinning them above her head. She looks up at me hovering above her, shocked and confused. Her mouth opens in protest. She even struggles to free herself from my grip, but I hold her tight and keep her quiet with a hush , pressing my finger on her lips.
“You want to come?” I murmur.
She nods desperately.
“I’ll let you come if you promise me something.”
“What is it?” Her words are thick with impatience.
“That’s not how this works. You make the promise first. I tell you the agreement after you come. Otherwise, you don’t come and I drive away.”
For the first time in our relationship, there’s a look in her eyes as though she’s afraid of me. Like she’s about to make a deal with the Devil. I’m not at all opposed to it, wanting to see how far Ally will take this. If I know anything about my girl, she won’t disappoint when in this desperate mood.
“I promise.”
A smile curls at my lips. I release her wrists and climb off her. “That’s my girl. Now, let me watch you make your pussy feel good.”
Ally’s fingers resume their work, plunging and stroking, bringing her right back to the edge of her orgasm. A sheen of sweat covers her skin. Her eyes clench shut, and her hips buck against her hand. Then her body tenses and she shudders with the force of her orgasm. I don’t know what gets me off more—the pleasure on her face, her pussy clenching around her fingers, or the way she moans my name while coming.
Ally collapses onto the car seat beneath me, satiated and her eyes glazed over with pleasure.
I sit back, rubbing a hand over my mouth as I glare out the window. One time—how the fuck am I meant to have sex with her only one time?
“Did I… do something wrong?” Her voice is small. “You’re angry.”
I look back at Ally, finding her with her bra back on and attempting to cover up with her dress. She has moments of acting with such sexual confidence that it’s easy to forget how inexperienced and vulnerable she can be.
I pull her onto my lap before she gets the dress on and kiss her softly. “You’re perfection, Ally. You didn’t do a thing wrong.”
I search her eyes, but she drops her head, refusing to look at me, just like after the kiss in her bedroom.
“Are you going to hate yourself after I fuck you too?” I ask.
“What do you mean?”
“You’re regretting what we just did. I won’t have sex with you if you’re going to end up regretting it.”
She keeps her gaze down. “I don’t regret anything that happened tonight. I feel ashamed for how much I liked it. There’s a difference. How can you not feel the same way? We shouldn’t be doing any of this.”
“I’m in too deep to care.”
She shakes her head. “You don’t mean that. You’re keeping us a secret too.”
“Because I know our parents would keep you away from me if they found out. They treat you like a child and you let them. You’re their precious little girl. Regardless, if people found out about us…” My throat works, despising the truth of what I’m about to say. “ You’d stay away from me out of your own choosing.”
She presses her lips together, her silence speaking for itself. I hate that she can so easily shut me out of her life. She’s done it once before. She’d do it again.
“We were perfect, Ally. You ruined us.”
“I know.”
“You were a fool for thinking running away from me would work.”
Her gaze remains lowered, cowered, and she murmurs, “Can I find out what promise I agreed to keep?”
I place a finger beneath her chin, raising her head till she meets my gaze. “This deal between us seems a little short-lived. I want to make the most of it and your virginity isn’t enough for me,” I tell her, my voice low but sharp. “I’m taking all your firsts. I’ll do whatever I want to you, whenever I want, and you’ll let me because you’re a fucking slut for me and want it. I own you, Ally. You won’t let anyone touch your pussy until I’ve fingered it, licked it, and fucked it myself. Likewise, you won’t jerk off a man unless it’s me. Your lips won’t wrap around anyone’s cock unless it’s mine. Understand?”
She sucks in a sharp breath, the look behind those blue eyes equal parts aroused and angered. “You’re being unreasonable. I told you I have a date?—”
“Exactly. Guess you won’t be doing much on this date.”
“Are you trying to keep me untouched for the rest of my life?” Now she’s just straight up furious with me, but I don’t care.
“Oh, please,” I laugh, releasing her chin. “I have good self-restraint but I’m not that good.”
“Dan…”
“You agreed.”
“You… manipulated me. You knew I’d say yes to anything when I was so close to…”
“Coming? Don’t start acting shy, beautiful.”
“You’re being a jerk right now, you know that?” Ally slides her dress back over her head then opens the door to leave.
Right as she climbs off me, I grab her hips, shoving them back to my lap, and bring her lips to mine.
She kisses me. Hard.
Her entire body clings to me and the hottest little moans leave her mouth.
“That’s better,” I tell her. “Admit it, you’re just as fucked up as I am and like this new arrangement between us. It’s been your deepest hidden fantasy for years to be owned in every way by me.”
“Are you this dominant with other girls?”
“You know I’m not. None of them have a hold on me like you do.”
Ally grinds against my dick, her breath heavy. “Then yes, I like being your property. You wanted me to be a needy slut for you. Here I am.” And then she’s gone from my arms, stepping out of the car and glaring at me over her shoulder. “Doesn’t mean I’m not angry with you right now.”