Chapter 8 Felix
CHAPTER EIGHT
FELIX
It’s taking tremendous effort to not be rock hard as I watch Harper across the engagement party.
Her scarlet hair spills over her bare shoulders, soft and long and begging to be pulled.
Her dress is emerald green and clings to her ass and tits like a second skin.
She’s not wearing a bra. Though her dress is elegant and floor-length, it’s backless and screams of sex.
She wore this dress to torment me. I know it.
Mission achieved.
I could lead Harper out of this party and fuck her in some dark corner of the gardens.
I need to feel her wrapped around my cock again.
No one would hear us over the music, nor would they notice our absence.
The night has settled into its rhythm, with most people deep in conversation or swaying on the dance floor.
Harper and I have performed all our duties as members of the wedding party.
We’ve posed for photos. I’ve given a toast as the best man.
Harper stands by a tower of champagne glasses with Killian and the two other bridesmaids, Violet and Zara. My brother makes Harper laugh, drawing my attention to her mouth.
Those red lips. Jesus.
They were made to suck cock. I want to fuck her mouth and come down her throat until she’s choking on me and mascara runs down her cheeks.
Goddammit. I need to pull myself together.
For eight years, I’ve had two rules for myself.
Two simple fucking rules.
Never trust Harper and Tyler.
And never, fucking ever, have sex with Harper.
I’m so unbelievably pissed off at myself for caving last night. I blame this beach house and all the memories attached to it, along with being a complete fucking idiot by entering Harper’s bedroom.
The sex was incredible. The best I’ve had since the last time we slept together.
She fucking stealthed me.
Not that I couldn’t have pulled out if I truly wanted to. My cum belongs in Harper. The moment was irresponsible. But I don’t care.
Part of me would feel so fucking smug if I got her pregnant. Not once have I thought about having kids, but fuuuck, I’m having some new feelings tonight.
This isn’t just about a fuck you to Tyler.
My cock throbs. I want that girl pregnant with my child. I want Harper tethered to me for life. When the child arrives, I want to keep fucking Harper pregnant, over and over.
Jesus Christ. I can’t think of anything hotter than Harper carrying my child and everyone knowing I fucked her and put a baby inside her.
Theo is close by, flirting with someone.
My little sister, the bride to be, is chatting my ear off beside me at this standing table, but I don’t hear a word of it while I watch Harper.
All that passes through my mind are flashbacks of how we clung to each other last night like no time had passed.
How we were one, body and soul. How much I want to sink my dick into her again, every day for the rest of my life. Just her. No one else.
I stayed buried in Harper all last night. I fucked her again as she slept, my rhythm slow, careful to not wake her. I barely needed to move before I was filling her with load after load of cum, until my dick was completely drained.
When thoughts of how much I still love Harper entered my mind, of how I could really be with Harper again, I slipped out of the room, needing to clear my head.
This isn’t love.
This is not love.
I repeat the words to myself several times, trying to make them sink in.
What I have with Harper is a toxic addiction I swore I’d never fall back into.
“Baby sis, tell me why Harper and Tyler broke up.”
“It’s not my place to share.” Ally straightens the pink bow in her hair. “So, do you think Dan will prefer the pink lingerie or red?”
My gaze tears from Harper for the first time in ten minutes, amused over Ally’s question. “You’re asking me for sex advice?”
“I guess.”
I laugh and glance back at Harper. “Believe me, the color of your lingerie is the last thing Dan will be focusing on. Back to the important topic: Harper and Tyler’s breakup.”
“Can’t you just tell her you love her?”
“I don’t love her.”
“You haven’t taken your eyes off her this entire evening.”
“Obsession doesn’t equal love.”
She sighs, her voice soft. “They weren’t happy without you. Harper isn’t going back to Tyler unless she has you too.”
I chew on the ice in my drink, surprised by the answer. When the three of us were together, I thought we were all equals and there were no favorites. No end to our trio. But I misread our connection. Harper and Tyler meant everything to each other, enough to choose each other over me.
You and me, always—I suppose their saying is no longer true.
“Maybe you don’t love Harper.” Ally shrugs and blows a lock of blond hair from her face. “I’ve made mistakes in the past with Dan, but now we would go through hell and back to be with each other. What you and Harper shared must have been surface level.”
“Ally…” I side-eye her with a warning.
“I know she loves you. Maybe her love is unrequited. If that’s the case, I’ll tell her to stop wasting her time with you and move on to something better.”
“You play the annoying little sister well.”
“Awww. Love you too.” Ally smiles, giving me her best cutesy act, then turns on her heels and prances across the party to Dan.
She surprises him from behind, placing both hands over his eyes. He spins to her with a grin and a look of filth. I’m no lip reader, but as Dan pulls Ally in close and brushes his mouth to her ear, I swear he says: Let’s get out of here, sis.
She laughs and hits his chest, but then weaves their fingers and leads him out of the marquee.
If only we were all as blissfully happy as they are.
Glancing down at my left palm, I trace a finger along the scar Harper gave me, remembering a time I was that happy.
Since our breakup, I’ve tried to forget about the scar, everything it symbolizes, and that Tyler has one too.
For the most part, I’ve been successful in ignoring the mark.
But there are nights when I lay in bed alone, staring at my palm, reliving every intimate moment Harper and I shared.
When the memories expand to the three of us, I instantly shut them down.
Those are the memories that hurt the most.
Tonight, however, Ally has gotten into my head about Harper and I feel the fight leaving me. Ally was only taunting, but her tactics worked.
In the distance, Harper laughs again. This time when I look at her, there’s so much more than just sex running through my mind. Every precious memory of her seems to hit me at once.
She’s my scarlet mirage.
Before this weekend, I’d convinced myself I could live without Harper. But she’s worked her way through the shield I placed around my heart and I don’t think I can fight her off.
I sigh, giving in.
I’ll talk to Harper. I’ll tell her not a day has gone by where I haven’t loved her.