Chapter 32
CHAPTER 32
Jackson: Coming home tonight. Will be at the hanger at 8 PM
Me: You want me to pick you up?
Jackson: Only if you’re not busy
My body was a bundle of nerves for the rest of the day. Jackson and I had experienced our fair share of differences lately. Add the long distance between us, and I wasn’t sure how things would be when he came home.
He didn’t think that Harper was an issue, but I knew that she was gunning to get Jackson back. He said he was committed to me, but what exactly did that entail? What did his commitment and our marriage matter if his heart longed for her? Did he wish that he was with her?
Fifteen minutes before 8 PM, I parked at the huge hanger. I was nervous. I showed my ID and was directed to a waiting area. There were dozens of people waiting. Most of them were women. Kids ran wild in their pajamas and jackets. I looked around, but I didn’t recognize anyone.
I became acutely aware of being noticed. I had a stupid smile pasted on my face, praying that someone might come over and say hi but no one did. I was too shy to approach any of the groups myself, so I took refuge in the farthest chair away from everyone and spent most of my time studying the floor. I knew people talked about me. I just didn’t know what to do about it.
I was in the bathroom in a stall when I heard a few women come in.
“I guess we know why someone of Jackson’s caliber ended up being married to someone like her.”
“Yeah, he got duped by the oldest trick in the book.”
My entire body went still as I listened to them talk.
“Remember Macy?”
“Yeah.”
“I’ll never forget this. This was years ago, and she was about to have a drunken one-nighter with Jackson. She stupidly suggested that he skip the condom and just withdraw. Instead, he pulled on his pants and walked out.”
“Well smart move on his part since we all know that Macy deliberately got pregnant to get her man to propose.”
“Well looks like the same thing happened to Jackson. I heard that she poked a hole in the condom.”
“Oh God. Poor Jackson.”
“I know, right? And poor Harper.”
I stood frozen in the bathroom stall. What was the obsession with Jackson and his birth control practices? Now more nasty rumors were flying around about poor Alien’s conception. This poor kid. Not even born and the object and scorn of half the base.
I opened the stall door and walked out. Four women stood at the mirror, putting on lipstick and fixing their hair .
Four sets of eyes glanced at me and then avoided my gaze as I stepped up to wash my hands. I didn’t recognize any of these women. That was the crazy part about all of this. Women whom I had never seen in my life were discussing my sex life and spreading nasty rumors about my marriage and unborn child. I was halfway to the door when I realized if I couldn’t stand up for my kid, then I would suck as a parent.
I stopped and turned. “I didn’t poke a hole in a condom. We didn’t use any protection. There wasn’t a single condom in sight.”
No one moved a muscle. Let them stew over that one. I turned on my heel and walked out. Even though my legs shook, I made it back to my seat. I felt exhilarated. The truth might be more shocking than the rumors, but at least I had, in some small part, taken charge of how I was going to be treated. I wasn’t going to run or hide from the rumors that chased me. They could have the truth and how they choose to deal with it was no longer my business.
Two hours later, we still waited. I felt exhausted. I closed my eyes. The chair was so hard it reminded me of the waiting room at the hospital. I was just dozing off to sleep, when I heard someone say, “Here they come.”
I rubbed my eyes and staggered to my feet. I looked at my watch. It was 10:50 PM. The excited bubbling crowd of women and kids had turned into a silent and weary group. We were led by someone into the large hanger and watched as the huge hanger doors slowly drew open. A massive military plane slowly taxied towards us. I stared at it in awe. I had never seen a plane that big. There was a cool wind, and my thin jean jacket was doing nothing to protect me. I was freezing cold. Our ragtag group huddled together as we watched in silence as the huge ramp at the back of the plane slowly lowered down to the ground.
Soldiers started filing off the plane. They were all dressed in uniform. They moved with orderly precision. It was an impressive sight. I never really could grasp Jackson or his job or what this life entailed, but this was his life. And somehow, this had become my life.
I watched him walk across the tarmac beside Forbes. He looked so strong the way he moved. He carried a huge green duffle bag over his shoulder. His big boots and his fatigues only added to his tough physique. Jackson was all man, and as a soldier he was heart-stopping.
I felt myself get nervous, as I watched him walk towards me. His eyes lifted and he scanned the group I was standing in. Would things be weird between us? The last time we talked, we had fought about Harper.
I felt a jolt the moment his eyes met mine. His expression was stoic, but it felt like the sun was again shining on my face. How had this man become so vital and so important to me? When had this happened? It staggered me knowing how much I needed him.
He walked towards me. I stood there frozen and stiff, aware that our reunion garnered a lot of attention. He dropped his bag and then he was picking me up in his arms and lifting me off my feet. My arms went up as I buried my face into his neck. He smelled so good. I was shaking from cold, fatigue and nerves.
“You’re trembling.”
“I’m cold.” My cold lips were stuck to the warm skin of his neck.
“How’s Alien?”
“Taking up more real-estate.”
He set me back down and held me so he could look me over. “That he is.”
“I’m exclusively in maternity clothes now.”
He picked up his bag and then grabbed my hand. “Let’s go home.”
Chloe howled when she saw Jackson. He gave her a good face washing until she calmed down.
“Someone is happy to see you.”
His smile was big. “She’s alright.”
“Do you want something to eat?”
“I’m good.”
He stood in the middle of the kitchen, dominating the room. I always seemed to forget how massive my husband was. He fairly towered over me. He studied me. “How have things been for you?”
“Everything is good. How are you? How was work?”
“Fine.”
I struggled to think of something to say. Things always seemed so weird when he came back. I felt awkward and shy around him.
I yawned.
“You look tired.”
I nodded. “Kinda.”
“Why don’t you head up to bed? I will be there in a bit.”
“Okay.”
In the morning, I woke up to the sound of Chloe whining. Jackson had come to bed last night, but he hadn’t woken me. Now it was morning and my dog needed to pee.
“Coming Chloe,” I gave a raspy call, as I forced myself to sit up in bed.
“I got it,” Jackson said. “You sleep.”
I dropped back onto my pillow, unable to open my eyes. “Don’t forget to check for chicken.”
He talked to Chloe, as they went downstairs.
Moments later, the back door slammed, and Jackson called, “Emily, where do you keep the plastic bags?”
My eyes opened wide. “Why?”
“I found some more chicken. ”
I grabbed my robe and hustled downstairs. Jackson was on the deck, wearing only a pair of sweats and he held Chloe by her collar.
He looked at me. “Can you take her?”
I hustled Chloe back into the house and then watched through the window as Jackson walked through the yard with bare feet. He bagged the offending chicken, threw it out and then made his way back to the house.
He stood there looking menacing, with his hands on his hips. He wasn’t impressed.
“How often do you find that shit?”
I shrugged. “There hasn’t been any chicken for a while.”
“This pisses me off.”
“Yeah. I know.”
“Why don’t you go back to bed?”
I yawned. “What are you going to do?”
“I’m going for a run.”
I had no idea where the man got all his energy from. “Okay.”
I woke up a second time. I thought I had heard Jackson come in, but he hadn’t come upstairs. On my way downstairs, I found him standing in Alien’s room. He stood in the middle of the room, his hands on his hips as he took in the mural.
The nighttime scene depicted little bear in bed, leaning up against father bear, who sat in bed with him and read him a bedtime story. Mother bear folded clothes and listened with a smile on her face. Grandma and grandpa bear looked on from the doorway with smiles on their faces. I had wanted the father bear and little bear relationship to be predominant in the mural.
He glanced at me in the doorway, but he didn’t speak. His face was blank, but the intensity in the way he studied the mural belied his disinterest. What was he thinking? Did he remember his mom when he looked at these childhood characters? I had wanted to honor his relationship that he had with his mom, but the amount of emotion that I could feel him hiding was catching me off guard.
He turned his attention to me. “I see that Alien’s crib has arrived.”
“I haven’t had a chance to put it together,” I lied. As if I had any intention of building that thing myself.
His head whipped over to me. “You think I’m not going to man up and build our kid’s crib?”
“Oh, well. If you want to.”
“Damn straight I will.”
I had to turn my face away, to hide my smile that threatened to give away my game.
His lips twitched. “Did you just play me?”
“I would never.”
He grabbed me around the waist. “I walked into that.”
“Well, it worked.”
He slapped me on the ass. “So, there are a bunch of guys that want to go out tonight.”
“Okay.”
“Wives are included.”
“I can make that work.”