Chapter 12 Solana
Chapter twelve
Solana
I'm stuffed after breakfast. Kade made eggs and bacon and toast with butter and fresh jam, which is not only more food than I've seen in months but fresher than anything I’ve had in years.
My stomach actually hurts from eating so much but it's a good kind of hurt, the kind that comes from being properly fed instead of perpetually hungry.
They showed me to the guest room after we finished eating, telling me that it would be my own personal space and however I decided to decorate it was up to me.
That’s when they realized I had nothing more than what I was currently wearing, both of them equally embarrassed when I explained that it was truly all I had.
Everything I ‘owned’ was really just property of Harmony.
There was a short tour in there somewhere, showing off where their bedroom and office was in respective to my space, as well as the bathroom, extra towels, and a host of information I was too tired to retain.
Now that I don’t feel so terrified, everything else is catching up to me, my body still worn and tired from all of yesterday’s events.
I barely make it into the space they’ve set aside as mine, the soft queen mattress in the middle of the room looking like heaven.
There’s a dresser and an open window bringing in natural light.
The whole space is bigger than three rooms at Harmony put together.
Harmony didn’t allow open windows and most of them were curtained because to them hope was dangerous.
Dustin blew me a kiss before leaving, Kade staying a few moments longer but letting me know they’ll be just across the hall if I need anything.
Dustin mentioned they'd go shopping at some point for clothes and anything else I might need.
Kade reminded me that I could explore the house if I wanted, that nothing was off limits.
Then they both retreated, giving me space that I'm not sure I actually want.
Now I'm sitting on the bed, trying to rest the way they suggested. My eyes keep darting to the closed door of my new bedroom and I hate it. Kade closed it to give me privacy, but the door being closed makes me feel uneasy even though I know it’s unlocked.
Every time I hear footsteps past the door in the hallway, I flinch.
My heart rate spikes and I have to remind myself that I'm not at Harmony House anymore.
Those aren't Wardens coming to check on me or drag me to another disciplinary meeting.
Those steps are just Dustin and Kade moving around their own home, doing whatever normal people do on a normal day.
However, that’s not the worst part. The room smells stale. Not bad, just unused, like it's been sitting empty for a while with the door closed and the windows shut. It doesn't smell like them. It smells neutral and generic and just... wrong.
Everything feels wrong. The bed is too big for just me.
The walls are too bare. The silence presses in from all sides, making my ears ring and my thoughts spiral.
It doesn't feel safe in here like it did when I was outside with Kade and Dustin.
Despite the fact that this is supposed to be my room, my space, my sanctuary from whatever hell I left behind, something is just.. . off.
Part of me knows I'm not being entirely rational.
They've been kind so far, more than kind actually.
But Harmony House taught me that kindness can be conditional, that it can be taken away the moment you step out of line or fail to meet expectations.
Maybe this is a test. Maybe they're waiting to see if I'll be grateful and stay quietly in my room like a good Omega should, proving that I can follow basic instructions without constant supervision.
Twenty minutes is all I can manage before I can't stand it anymore. The walls feel like they're closing in and my chest is so tight I can barely breathe. I need to get out of this room. I need to hear voices and smell their scents and know that I'm not alone in this big house.
Moving to the door, I slowly open it and peek out into the hallway.
Dustin is on the phone across the hall in their office.
I can see him through the partially open door, pacing back and forth with animated gestures.
He's smiling but there's heat in his voice, some kind of passionate discussion I can't quite make out.
Kade is in the office too, a little further in, sitting in a chair with his laptop balanced on his lap, his brows furrowed in concentration.
They both look dangerous. Not in a threatening way but in a capable way, like they could handle whatever came at them without breaking a sweat.
It should scare me, but instead it makes me feel safer.
These are Alphas who know what they're doing, who have control over their lives and their space and probably a dozen other things I don't even know about yet.
The hallway smells so much better than the room. Their scents drift through the air, mixing together into something that makes my shoulders relax and my breathing ease. I’m grateful for the room but this...
A stupid idea forms in my head as I rush back to the bed and grab the blanket before moving toward Dustin's office.
I'm too scared to go inside, worried about interrupting or being where I'm not supposed to be.
But I can sit just outside the room, right?
Close enough to catch their scent and hear their voices, but far enough away that I'm not intruding on whatever work they're doing.
Settling on the floor with my back against the wall, I wrap the blanket around my shoulders and pull my knees up to my chest. From here, I can see both of them in the office.
The sounds of their voices wash over me, comforting even though I've only known them for a day.
It's strange how quickly their presence has become something I crave, something I need to feel settled.
However, sleep might be my worst nightmare when they find me here.
Maybe they'll be angry that I didn't stay in my room like they told me to.
Maybe they'll think I'm clingy or needy or too broken to be worth the trouble they went through to get me out of Harmony House.
But the sounds of their voices and the smell of their scents and the knowledge that they're close by is perfect, more perfect than anything I've experienced in years.
My eyes drift closed. Just for a moment, I tell myself.
Just until I catch my breath and gather the courage to either go back to my room or actually approach them properly and ask if I can sit with them instead of hiding in the hallway but sleep pulls me under, dragging me down before I can fight it.