Chapter 21
It took several moments for Liv’s heart to stop racing, and just as her skin started to cool Dev’s arm curved around her. He pulled her onto his body, her back to his front, curling around her as he used his other arm to drag the coverlet over them both.
Liv stared into the semi-darkness, unable to keep the incredulous smile from her face. Dev hadn’t been lying when he said there’d be passion between them, and she could hardly believe that she was here, naked in bed with him. A virgin no more.
His nose nuzzled her nape, and he pressed a soft kiss to her bare shoulder, but his voice when it came was low. Serious.
“Did I hurt you, Liv?”
She shook her head. “No. Not at all. I promise.”
“Next time, we’ll go slower.”
“You want there to be a ‘next time’?” She’d tried to sound arch, but it came out more hopeful than anything else.
His rumble of laughter tickled her neck. “I want a thousand ‘next times.’”
Her heart gave a delighted little flip. “You do?”
“Maybe more than a thousand,” he admitted softly. “To do all the things I’ve dreamed of showing you.”
“For example?” she teased.
“Wicked girl. I’m not sure you’re ready to hear them just yet. You were a virgin ten minutes ago.”
“And now I’m not,” she said simply. “And I don’t regret it one bit. Go on, tell me.”
He gave her neck a playful little bite and she shivered in dark delight.
“All right. For example, I want to pour champagne on your beautiful breasts and lick it off. I want to drink champagne out of you. I want to take you in every single room of this house, and in my weather station, and in my house in London. I want you outside in the summer, and inside by the fire. I want you on top of me, and under me, and next to me. I want your hands on me, and I want you to take me in your mouth, and I want to make you scream my name with pleasure as many times as I can.”
Liv’s breath caught in her throat and hope tightened her chest. “That sounds like it might take a while.”
“It will, I’m sure.”
“Longer than just until the end of the month.”
“I think so,” he agreed. “In fact, I have a horrible suspicion it’s going to take the rest of our lives.”
Liv turned over to face him and tried to see him in the darkness. “You said you’d show me the physical benefits of marrying you.”
His brows rose as his mouth curved up. “Haven’t I convinced you? Do you need another demonstration?”
“Oh, you’ve convinced me. But—”
“But?”
She took a deep breath and decided to be brave. He’d opened himself to her, after all. Allowed her to see him in his darkest, most vulnerable moments. She should at least give him the same amount of honesty.
“I always said I’d only marry a man if I loved him, and he loved me in return.”
His face gave nothing away. “Hmm. And you think that’s a problem here?”
Heat warmed her cheeks, but she forced herself to go on. “Not on my side.” She felt his body stiffen, tense in sudden awareness as he absorbed her confession. “I’ve been in love with you since I was sixteen. And while I’m sure you want me physically, I don’t think—”
His low growl cut her off. “You don’t think I love you?” He sounded half amused, half incredulous. He stroked her jaw, lifted her chin to look deep into her eyes. “Olivia Price, I have loved you for years. Since before I even went to Belgium.”
She shook her head. “Not true.”
“Very true,” he sighed. “Horribly true. Six years. And I’ve wanted to marry you for just as long.”
“That can’t be—”
His lips curved up. “I can prove it.”
Her heart was pounding, but she was too afraid to trust the excitement rushing through her veins. The hope. “You can’t prove something like that.”
“I can. You know that piece of paper I showed your uncle the other day? It wasn’t an I.O.U from your father.”
“He didn’t owe you six hundred pounds?”
“Oh, he did. And more. But that wasn’t what was on the paper.”
“What was it then?”
“A special license. Signed by the Archbishop of Canterbury. It’s downstairs, in the desk in my study.”
Livvy frowned. “I don’t understand. When did you get that?”
“Six years ago. The week after Napoleon escaped from Elba. When Lucien and I realized we’d have to join Wellington and see Bonaparte defeated for good.
” His thumb stroked her jaw, a devastatingly gentle caress.
“I was going to ask you to marry me before I went, but then I realized I might not come back, and it wouldn’t be fair to leave you a widow. ”
Liv sucked in a breath. Her chest felt too tight, as if it might burst from so many conflicting emotions.
“But I promised myself that if I survived, and you were still free when I got back, then I’d ask you.”
She swallowed. “You changed your mind.”
“Never,” he growled. “I wanted you even more. I’d seen how quickly life could change, how easily it could all be taken away.
” He shook his head. “But I was broken. I started having nightmares. Not just at night, but in the day, too. Any time I heard a loud noise. And whenever there were fireworks, or thunder, well, you saw me earlier. I’d . . . lose myself.”
Liv pressed her palm flat against his chest, offering silent support. But she let him continue.
“How could I ask you to deal with all that?” His rough exhale ghosted over her cheek. “I could barely control myself. I was terrified I’d hurt you, scare you.”
“So you pulled away.” Her heart ached for him. For all the time they’d lost, even though she could understand his reasoning. Admire his selflessness.
“I wanted you to have the chance to find someone else. You deserved that. Not to be tied to a madman.” He gave a soft laugh.
“But it killed me to stay away, to watch you laughing and dancing with other men, even though I knew I had no right to be so jealous. You weren’t mine.
But I was selfishly glad you never seemed to take any of them too seriously. ”
He brushed a curl from her cheek and tucked it behind her ear.
“I watched you make a success of your work at King I might never be better, not completely, but you needed saving now.
So, I rode up here as fast as I could, and when I saw you with your uncle, when I realized how bad your situation was, God, I wanted to beat him for threatening you. For trying to take advantage.”
She let out a small sigh. “Well, I can’t say I regret stabbing him. I hope it hurt.”
“Me too.” He shook his head. “But after he offered for you, I didn’t want you to feel like marrying me was your only way to escape him.
I still don’t want you to feel that. I meant what I said.
If you don’t want to be my duchess, then I’ll do everything in my power to make sure you’re safe and provided for. ”
His eyes held hers and her heart squeezed at the utter devotion in his expression. “Everything I have is yours, Liv. I’m yours. I always have been.”
Liv pressed her lips to his. “If you’d told me you loved me when you proposed, I would have said yes right away. It’s the only thing that matters to me.” She pulled back in time to see the surprise and relief on his face. “You should have asked me the minute you came back from war.”
“That’s what Lucien said. And you’re both right. I should have trusted you to help me, not shut you out.”
She tucked her head under his chin and snuggled into the crook of his neck with a happy sigh. “Well, I know now, and I don’t love you less. Do you have any other deep dark secrets you want to tell me about?”
She felt his shoulder shift under her cheek as he shrugged. “No. You already know I like to read. And I’m not nearly the black-hearted scoundrel everyone likes to believe. What about your secrets? Apart from a bloodthirsty habit of impaling people who propose to you with sharp objects.”
She chuckled. “I promise I’ll never to do that again. Not to you, at least. And you already know all my secrets. I’m a shameless hussy with barely a penny to my name, and I expect I’ll be the subject of gossip if I’m ever invited anywhere in the Ton again.”
“As my duchess you’ll be invited everywhere.
The gossip won’t touch you.” His arms tightened around her, and he pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head.
“But I will. If you marry me, I doubt I’ll be able to keep my hands off you.
I’ll want to touch you and hold you for as long as we both shall live. ”
Liv smiled into his neck. “Well, that doesn’t sound too bad. As long as I can touch you back.”
“So you’ll marry me?” The eagerness in his tone made her heart soar.
“Do you still want to sleep in separate beds?”
“God, no. I only said that so you wouldn’t do exactly what you did tonight and walk in on me during one of my episodes. If you want to share a bed, then I’m all in.”
“In that case, I accept your proposal, Devlin Hamilton. I would love to be your duchess.”
A dull rumble of thunder punctuated her vow, but the storm had started to move away, its ferocity a thing of the past. Dev lowered his head and kissed her, and her temperature started to rise again.
“Do you know,” Dev murmured against her lips, “I might even be able to look forward to thunderstorms, now I know how willing you are to help.”
Liv gave his lower lip a gentle tug with her teeth. “So willing. Whatever it takes.” She wriggled against him and his body responded with flattering enthusiasm. “Now, why don’t we try another of those wicked ideas you were telling me about?”
In a lightning-fast move, Dev flipped over onto his back and pulled her on top of him, and she let out a delighted yelp of surprise at the sudden reversal of their positions. She pushed up on her hands, her hair swinging wildly about her face, and gazed down at the man who owned her heart and soul.
His wicked grin made her stomach somersault in anticipation. She couldn’t wait to discover everything he had in store.
“It will be my pleasure,” he growled, his hands settling on her hips. “And yours, my duchess. Always.”
* * *
Thank you for reading My January Duke.