Chapter 42
Noa
N oa sat at the long oak dining table that had served countless family dinners and celebrations over the years.
Tinks purred contently in her lap as Noa stared out the window with her hands wrapped around her favourite polka dot mug, letting the contents warm her fingers.
Even in the summer, the high ceilings and thick walls meant the Drakes’ kitchen was always cool.
She quite liked it, though, gazing out at the rich variety of plants, lovingly potted by her mum, whilst also avoiding breaking out in a sweat.
She’d sat gazing out at the same view for most of the day whilst the rest of the family were at work.
It had given her space to work on her novel in peace and quiet before they all returned for their typical Friday night dinner.
A banditry of blue tits flew past the window before landing on the berry tree at the bottom of the garden.
The movement made Noa realise she hadn’t been writing for a good twenty minutes but had, instead, been lost in her daydreams of Alex.
Except, they weren’t daydreams. They were her reality now.
She wiggled her mouse and her laptop whirred back to life, her manuscript once again filling the screen.
It had been four weeks since she had started working for Alex, and she was surprised by how motivated and inspired she’d been with her writing in that time.
But then, she supposed, it’d be hard not to be inspired when you are getting railed by a sexy as sin man six ways to Sunday every single night.
Because that’s what it had turned into. They might be moving quick, considering, but they now spent every single night together and the whole thing just felt right.
Tes, the true best friend that she was, had been covering for Noa by corroborating the story that she was staying at her house most nights since she’d still not found the right way or the right time to share the news with her family yet.
When she was at his place, Alex still liked to watch Noa write and, sometimes, when she’d exceeded the word count she had set for herself, he would even reward her with an orgasm or two.
And, boy, did he know lots of different ways to do it.
It wasn’t a bad way to end a day and, sometimes, she couldn’t believe she ever went without him.
She flushed at the thought. Even though no one was around to see it, her eyes bounced around the kitchen, as if confirming there was no one to hear her inner thoughts.
A family photo caught her attention amongst the many that were pinned to the gallery wall.
Alex was in it. It was the night of her nineteenth birthday, and they all looked so young.
One thing she hadn’t noticed before, though, was that Alex wasn’t looking at the camera in the photo. His attention was fixed on her.
Noa stood from the table, her chair scraping against the linoleum floor as she moved to take a closer look. The expression on Alex’s face was adoring. Maybe more, even. Something inside her ached at the sight.
She thought back to that night, the night she had lost her virginity to a man she’d now lost her heart to, and she wished she hadn’t run away like she had. Wished she’d given the whole thing a chance, because it felt like they had wasted so much time.
But then, she also felt like everything happened for a reason and, maybe, this was how things were meant to turn out.
Maybe, things wouldn’t have worked back then.
That’s one of the reasons that she had left in the first place, to protect Ryan and Alex’s relationship, but also because she was young, and she knew the likelihood of a relationship at that age lasting in the long run was slim.
Long distance made those chances even slimmer.
It didn’t feel worth risking their relationship back then for something that wouldn’t last. But things felt different now.
So, maybe, she should thank her younger self for making the decision she did back then.
The front door burst open and Noa heard bags crashing to the floor and boots being flung off. She cleared her throat and blinked rapidly to dissipate the emotion that had just taken over her before Ryan walked through the door.
No one but him would make that kind of entrance, and she didn’t want to answer any questions that would follow as a result.
A fter Ryan had arrived at their parents’ house, followed by her mum and dad, Noa cleared her writing materials and set the table for dinner.
Tonight, after so much time spent with Alex recently, she was spending the night at home. Ryan had been busy with his presentation at work, so he, too, had been spending more time at his cottage, meaning the two of them had barely seen each other.
As her mum cooked her homemade beef stew and dumplings, Ryan spent the night quizzing Noa on why she’d been MIA, and it was getting harder and harder to lie to him.
‘Seriously, I feel like I saw you more when you lived five hours away with that douche of a boyfriend,’ he complained, his tone mirroring that of a whiny toddler.
Noa rolled her eyes, exasperated at how dramatic he was being and praying he would let it go soon.
‘One, despite us being together for six years, you barely even knew him. And two, you’ve had your head down working your ass off for the pastoral lead role, so how am I being accused of being the MIA one?’ she countered.
‘Exactly, you two were together that long and he rarely ever came around. So that’s all I need to know,’ Ryan responded, completely ignoring her argument that he had been equally as busy, too.
His words stung. She felt like someone had slammed into her gut, but only because of the undeniable truth to them. But, Ryan continued his probing, so she couldn’t dwell on them long .
‘So, do I need to have a word with Tes for hogging all your attention, then? Between her and this next bestseller of yours, I’m feeling very neglected.’
She was lucky her brother had been so distracted lately with his presentation. She was sure they’d have been busted a lot sooner if he’d had more time to think on the sheer amount of time she was ‘staying at Tes’s’. But with his mind elsewhere, he hadn’t yet called her out on how suspicious it was.
Ignoring the guilt she felt at that, Noa decided to settle into the gentle teasing her and Ryan knew best.
Sticking out her bottom lip and twisting her fists against her eyes she mocked him, ‘Boohoo, you big cry-baby. Do you not have friends of your own to demand all their time from. It’s not my fault some of us have a life.’
‘I have plenty of friends, thank you, but sue me for wanting more sibling time. There’s me thinking I got best friend rights since I’ve been there for you since… oh, I don’t know… birth. But whatever, I guess.’
‘Oh yeah, because you had a choice in that,’ Noa laughed.
‘Things are just crazy right now, and I am trying to get settled. But I will make a mental note to make more time for your needy ass. I thought we had grown out of needing dedicated “sibling time”,’ she said whilst crooking her fingers in the air to make quotation marks.
‘But I was wrong, and I will remember that in the future.’
Ryan slouched down in his chair like a petulant child, folding his arms over his chest.
‘Thank you. That’s all I ask.’
Her dad, who had sat reading his newspaper, unfazed by their playful bickering, just looked up and winked at her. It was like his version of a pat on the back for placating her brother .
Whilst Ryan spoke, her mum kept giving knowing looks, but Noa just focused on trying to ignore them. She averted her eyes, looking down at the table, her fingers tracing the very obvious groove she had once tried to hide after she’d sliced into the oak during an evening of pumpkin-carving.
They’d been watching a scary movie on her laptop at the time, as was tradition before Halloween.
At the height of a scary scene, Ryan had jumped from behind her to shout in Noa’s ear.
With a shriek of fear, she’d cut straight through the pumpkin and into the table.
Alex, who usually loved to take part in Ryan’s pranks and teasing, had taken this one badly and berated him for a solid five minutes about how risky it had been whilst she was holding a knife.
He then got to work trying to help Noa try to hide the mark from her mum.
The memory made her realise that he had always been protective over her, and maybe she had missed so many signs. Despite their best efforts, Noa had never been able to hide anything from her mum, and she saw straight through them. Like Noa was sure she could now.
Instead of getting angry at them about the slice, though, her mum had pointed to the doorjamb where height markers were drawn throughout her childhood, then to the colourful family portrait in the corner of the skirting boards and said, ‘This house is a home, Noa. It’s the memories littered throughout that make it. ’
Lifting her head from the table and taking in the loving family that surrounded her, Noa suddenly felt intense guilt that she had let this thing go on for so long whilst lying to her brother.
If her mum knew without her telling her, then it was only a matter of time until Ryan would figure it out.
She owed it to him to be the one to tell him directly.
They would tell him soon. She just needed to find the right time, and over family dinner was not it.
A fter a very draining family dinner, Tes arrived unannounced at their door, much to Ryan’s joy.
Noa had never felt so glad to be saved by her best friend.
Physically pulling her from the kitchen and up the stairs to her bedroom, she closed the door and fell back onto the bed, letting out a long breath.
‘Well, you look tense,’ Tes observed.