Chapter 10
Violet
Two months later
The past three months have been a struggle. The longing for my Alphas is strong. There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think about them.
With the help of my friends and keeping myself busy at work, I’ve been able to keep myself from slipping completely into depression.
My girls are at my door every day, waking me up and refusing to go to work without me by their side.
The first few weeks after everything settled was hard. I cried a lot, more than I ever have before.
I was tempted to get in contact with them, to just hear their voices.
But I didn’t, knowing it would only hurt more if I did.
They had a life, a girlfriend, and a baby on the way. I had no place in their lives.
What I needed to do was focus on my own, to not let myself slip into a dark space I couldn’t find my way out of.
Coming to work every day has been good for me. Working with the students, helping them find their packs however, isn’t so easy.
I took a step back, working more with the admissions part of the pack program. Before, when an Omega would come to my office and tell me how happy they were that they found their pack or thanked me for helping them, it would bring me joy. Now, it just makes me sad and pity myself.
I’m not one to do that—to feel sorry for myself. Life is life, and we have to keep moving forward.
That was, until this morning when I realized I hadn’t had a heat since the one I spent with the guys.
Now, it’s a possibility that my body has just gone back to the way it was before, the pain of missing my scent matches could cause me to suppress my heat again.
Looking at this from all angles, I know it’s not the only option. I wasn’t on birth control when I had my heat. I didn’t bother with it because I wasn’t seeing anyone before, nor did I have a sex life. Hell, I didn’t even have heats. The likelihood of me getting pregnant, even if I was having sex, was low.
But I did end up having my heat and a hell of a lot of unprotected sex. So much cum . Like, an obscene amount.
I can’t believe I didn't even think of this possibility before.
With all the stress, I didn’t think about my first missed heat. I was used to not getting them as it was. So, it wasn’t on my mind.
Missing my second... that caused me to think.
And now I’m sitting here, at the school’s nurse's office, with a damn pregnancy test in my hand, shaking like a leaf.
Slowly, I take deep, trembling breaths, my stomach twisting in knots. I feel like I’m going to be sick.
“Just turn it over, Letty. Just look at the damn test.” My voice is a little hysterical as my knee bounces uncontrollably, but if there was any time to freak the fuck out, it would be now.
Maybe I should call the girls. This is something best friends do together, right? Or is it something you do with your pack?
Fuck. I don’t know. I didn’t think something like this would happen to me anytime soon. I’d been a damn virgin before all this happened.
Closing my eyes, I flip the test over in my hand, and with another deep breath, I open them, glancing down.
Seconds tick by as my eyes lock on the word showing on the tiny screen. Pregnant.
I just stare at it, blinking as my mind tries to process this new development.
I’m pregnant. There’s a little baby growing inside me. A life.
I blink and blink and blink some more as my heart starts to pick up in pace, my breaths coming out faster and faster.
“Oh god.” I stand up quickly. “Fuck. No. No, this can't be happening.” I start to pace the room, feeling a panic attack hit me hard.
I can’t do this. I’ve always wanted kids, love them, and it’s been a dream of mine to be a mom... but not like this.
I should be over the moon with excitement; I should be thrilled.
But all I do is start to cry, my hand coming up to my mouth as I smother a sob.
Because I’m pregnant with a pack who already has a baby on the way.
How has this become my life? What did I do to deserve all of this?
Who could be so cruel to not only give me my scent match Alphas but tear them away from me, then make me pregnant with their kid?
Heat flashes through me as a wave of nausea causes my stomach to lurch. I need to get out of here. I can’t breathe. I can’t think.
With the test clutched in my hand, I pull the nurse’s office door open and rush out.
“Miss Hart. Are you okay?” Bev, the school nurse, asks with concern.
“I’m fine,” I say in a rush. “I’ll be okay.” I do my best to give her a reassuring smile, but it comes out pained more than anything.
I feel anything but fine right now. I feel like my world is crashing down around me... again.
With shaking hands, I grab my phone out of my pocket and dial Jenny as I quickly make my way down the halls heading towards my office.
“Hey, Letty. Everything okay?”
“Code Purple,” I sob out. “My office. Now.”
“Fuck. Okay, shit. Yeah. We’ll be there soon,” Jenny curses.
“Hurry,” I whimper as I hang up the phone.
Once I’m in my office, I head over to the little reading nook I turned into a nest. A place to center myself if I’m having a stressful day at work.
Throwing myself into the pile of blankets, I wrap my arms around some and bury my face into the soft fabric.
Then I break. Deep, heavy sobs leave me as I panic. I spiral, feeling so out of control.
“Shit, Letty,” Jenny’s voice has me peeking my head out of the blankets ten minutes later.
My head is pounding, tears staining my cheeks and the blankets. I probably have a snotty nose, too. But I don’t care because when Jenny kneels down next to me, I throw myself into her arms.
She knows what to do, wrapping her body around mine. “Shhhh,” she says in a soothing tone. “It’s okay. You're going to be okay. I got you.”
“We got you,” Jenna agrees, joining us on the floor. If I wasn’t such a mess right now, I'd probably be a little pissy about them touching my nest, but because it’s not my real nest and I’m having a life crisis, I don’t care.
With the girls surrounding me, I can feel their love, support, and strength coming off in waves. The pressure of Jenny’s hold and having the girls at my back settles some of the panic inside me.
“Better?” Jenny asks. “Because if not, I can start purring.”
I let out a choked laugh. “Better,” I whisper in confirmation.
“Now, wanna tell me why you're scaring the living shit out of us? Did someone die?”
“Ahh. No. Something lives. Is living. Is growing?” Jenna questions, sounding unsure.
“What the hell are you going on about?” Jenny asks. I move my head, peeking over at Jenna, who’s holding my pregnancy test in her hand. Her lips are parted, and her eyes are wide. Her gaze slowly rises to meet mine.
“You're pregnant?” she asks me.
“Hold up.” Jenny pulls back to gape down at me. “You're pregnant?”
“Hence why I’m freaking the fuck out,” I groan, burying my face into her neck.
“Shit, babe,” Jenny sighs, rubbing my back.
“What are you going to do?” This comes from Rylee, her question soft.
“I don’t know,” I answer honestly.
“You have choices, you know,” Jenna offers, swallowing hard. “If this isn’t something you're ready for, something you don’t want, you don’t have to follow through with the pregnancy.”
The thought of ending the pregnancy makes my stomach turn. “I’m keeping the baby,” I say with a lot more confidence than I'm feeling. Hell, I haven't even had the chance to really let the reality of the situation sink in.
I am pro-choice, and women should have the right to do with their bodies what they please. It is their body, despite how much the men of this world try to control us.
Men rule the world, Alphas more than any designation. A bunch of fools who think they know what's better for women than the women themselves. It’s a joke if you ask me.
Even if I choose to end the pregnancy, trying to find a clinic that will do the procedure would be hard. There’s one in LA. One. That's it. It’s not right.
Thankfully, it’s not something I’m going to have to deal with. Not now, and hopefully not ever.
“So... we’re going to be aunties?” Rylee asks, lips spreading into a big grin.
“Yeah. I guess you are.” I smile back, doing my best to try and be excited.
Her face falls. “You're still in shock, huh?”
“Yup.” I nod, burying my face back into Jenny’s neck.
Having the comfort of an Alpha is helping me a lot right now. But she’s not my Alpha. My heart and soul ache for them, for all three of them, right now.
“I’m going to have to tell them,” I state, sighing heavily as I wiggle out of Jenny’s hold. Jenna stands, grabs my hand, and pulls me to my feet. “As much as I hate the idea of adding more stress and drama to their lives, the fact of the matter is that this is their baby, too. They helped make it; they knew what they were doing when we slept together. Sex, even with protection, is always risking pregnancy. It’s why I’m not putting the blame on them. I’m half at fault.”
“Are you going to call them?” Jenna asks.
“No.” I shake my head. “Something like this can’t be done over the phone. I’ve had my head in the sand for too long now. As much as I hate the idea of going back to Snow Valley and facing them—and their girlfriend—it’s what needs to be done. Because we don’t only have being scent matches to talk about, we now have a baby too.”
My eyes lower to my belly as my hand covers my abdomen. There’s a life growing inside me. I’m going to be a mom.
This is really happening.
I should have suspected sooner. Some of the signs were there.
I’ve been a lot more tired than I used to be. Sure, it could have been from the stress of everything that's been going on, but it doesn’t explain the fact that my tits were getting bigger and more tender. And the fact that I had to piss far more than I should.
“If they don’t want this baby, fuck them,” Rylee declares. “You have us. We will form our own pack.”
Jenny chuckles. “Huh. A pack of all women. That would be something.”
Rylee looks over at her, cheeks turning red, but she doesn’t say anything else.
“She’s right,” Jenna chimes in. “No matter what happens, you have us. We’re going to love this baby so damn hard. He or she will never want or need anything.”
My eyes tear up, and my lower lip quivers. Damn hormones. “Guys,” my voice cracks.
“Come on, bring it in,” Jenny laughs.
We do a group hug, just standing there, holding one another.
These girls are my family, my people. I can’t imagine my life without them. Because of them, I know that no matter what happens with me and the guys, I’ll be okay. Maybe not right away, but with time, I will be.
One day at a time. That's all I’m able to do right now.
It’s a week later, and I’m back at the airport, bags in hand. I packed enough for a few weeks, just to be sure. I don’t know what to expect, and I’m terrified.
The last thing I want to do is ruin someone’s family, but I’m not the only one to blame. Sylvia can be mad at me all she wants, but the fact is, I didn’t know about her. I didn’t even know these guys.
This was something none of us could control. Not even the sex part... well, kind of.
Alphas are primal beings. They have the urge to protect and provide. Not all, but most.
That includes the need to please their Omega. Relationship dynamic aside, I technically am their Omega. Fate has made it that way. None of us had a choice in this.
Okay, maybe Nolan did. He wasn’t driven by the bond or crazy uncontrollable Alpha instincts.
Does it make me a bad person if part of me liked it? That Nolan didn’t have anything driving his need and want for me. It was all natural.
Something I can’t ever say with a hundred percent certainty with the other two.
“Get a hold of yourself, Violet,” I mutter to myself.
“You okay?” Jenna asks.
“Huh?” I blink over at her. “Yeah. I’m fine. Just nervous.”
We stop outside the security entrance. Jenna places my bags on the ground and pulls me into a hug. “Everything will be okay. No matter the outcome, you’ll be okay.”
“I hope so,” I sigh, hugging her back. “I really do.”
I’m absolutely terrified.
After finding out I was pregnant, I booked an appointment with an OBGYN and was able to get in the next day. One of the perks of being an Omega, I guess.
There, it was confirmed I was indeed pregnant. Not only with a blood and pee test, but they did an ultrasound, too. They saw the baby itself and notified me that I was twelve weeks along.
They asked if I wanted to hear their heartbeat or to see them for myself, but I declined. The idea of experiencing those important firsts on my own didn’t feel right.
If things went well and the guys, at the very least, wanted to be involved in the baby’s life, I’d want them to be there to see it with me.
And if they didn’t and I came back to Calling Wood, broken-hearted yet again—this time a single mom—I’d have my girls at my side. I know they would enjoy it just as much as I would.
With my girls by my side, we head through security to our gate.
The flight to Snow Valley wasn’t easy. I ended up puking more than once, unsure if it was from being pregnant, nerves, or air sickness.
What I did know was that it was embarrassing.
Safe to say, I spent half the flight in the bathroom.
Now that we’ve landed and hopped in our rental car, we headed towards Snow Valley.
As we make our way through the winding roads of the mountains, I take in the slight changes to the scenery. The girls make conversation with each other, but I remain quiet, too nervous and in my own head about what's to come.
There’s still snow, but it’s almost April, and things will start to melt soon. So now, the ground isn’t completely covered in snow and some green is starting to peek out.
I can only imagine the beauty of this place during the spring and summer months. God, and Autumn? The different colored leaves! A part of me wants to see it all so badly.
The closer we get to the town, the more a sense of rightness settles over me. Like this is where I’m supposed to be, where I belong. It’s strange, and I’m not sure if I like it.
As we pass the ‘Welcome To Snow Valley’ sign, I remember that I’m not really sure how to get to the guy's place.
Their cabin is only a few minutes by snowmobile from mine, but I don’t know how to get there from the road.
Looks like we’ll be asking for directions in town. Hopefully, they’re willing to give us the answers, or we’ll have to risk driving down every turn off road until I get there.
We haven’t booked flights back because we didn't know how long we were going to be here. But I do know I have to at least stay for a few days because there were no flights out until before then.
We’re going to have to go grab a few things to get us through the next few days.
As we make it past a few shops, my stomach growls. “Yeah, I bet you’re hungry,” I mutter to myself. “Seeing how you puked up everything you ate today.”
“You okay Letty?” Jenny asks.
“Yup. Just hungry.”
“Let’s stop and grab something to eat,” Jenna suggests.
I’m still crazy nervous, but I know if I don’t at least try to have something to eat, I’m going to feel worse.
So when I see a little cafe called The Hearty Bean , I tell Jenny to pull into the parking lot.
It’s a cute little place. The outside gives off a small-town diner vibe, but as I step inside, I smile. It’s a hell of a lot more stylish than something you typically see in a small town.
Walking up to the counter, I take a look at the menu as the girls go grab a table.
“Hello, welcome to The Hearty Bean. I’m Macy. What can I get for you today?”
My gaze drops to the little brown-haired, hazel-eyed, Omega. “Hi.” I give her a friendly smile. “I’d like a coffee,” I start, then remember coffee shouldn’t be something I’m drinking. “Actually, I’ll grab a mango smoothie... and a BLT please.”
“For sure,” she says, looking down at her computer. “Can I get a name for the order, please?”
“Yeah, sure. It’s Violet.”
She looks up at me with a curious look. “Violet?”
“Yes?”
“Huh.” She nods her head as she types.
Strange. “Also, I was wondering if you knew where Nolen, Aiden, and Thomas live? They’re a pack from around here.”
This time, her eyes snap up to mine, going wide. Awesome. She knows who I am. She probably knows I’m some home-wrecking Omega too. Just great.
“Violet.” She grins, saying my name again, but this time a little too excited. What is going on? “Yup. I do know where they live, and I can tell you how to get there.”
She gives me step-by-step instructions on which road to take, which turn off leads to their home, and how long to drive before getting to their place.
Once we all order, I suggest we don’t stay and eat. Macy seems like a nice person, but she keeps looking at me with a way-too-happy grin, and it’s freaking me out.
She even yelled good luck as I left the cafe.
This town is weird already.
We end up quickly eating in the car, surprising myself that I was actually able to eat everything.
Once I grab what I need from the store, I decide that heading to my cabin to freshen up and maybe take a much-needed nap to help me relax before delivering some life-changing news to these guys is the best option for me.
The drive up there is a lot easier than when I was here last; the roads are clear, and so is the driveway when we get up to the cabin.
Parking the car, we bring everything to the front porch, not wanting to make a bunch of trips in the snow to the car and risk me falling.
After I accepted that I was pregnant, I fell in love with the little one growing inside me hard and fast. My world might keep changing in the blink of an eye, but I don’t regret this baby one bit.
“Alright, little one,” I sigh, rubbing my belly as I put the last of the food away in the fridge. “Shower, then it's time to face your daddies.”
Something I am both excited and terrified to do.