44. Another Letter?
Another Letter?
Doug
I should have asked questions. I should have stayed and asked what fuckin’ universe Jessie was living in, but I didn’t. Instead, I turned and walked out of the front door, and I’ve been throwing a ball in the backyard for Harley for the past thirty minutes.
What the fuck?
‘Harley, come and get a drink.’ Mama’s voice behind me startles me, and I suddenly feel guilty for keeping Harley out here running around in this heat. She’s a good dog, and she stayed, even when I didn’t notice her panting, her tongue hanging out.
I turn to see Harley taking a long drink on the back patio before flopping down on the cool tiles in the shade.
‘You want to tell me why you’re out here sweating out half your body weight and hers?’
I sit on the patio chair next to Mama’s and inhale deeply.
‘Everything is fucked.’
‘I’ll excuse the language this time because of the look on your face, but don’t forget who you’re talking to.’
I turn to look at her, ready to apologize, when I see her wink. She’s been at Merv’s, and I’m pretty sure Bree didn’t tell her anything because she’s not kicking my butt.
‘Mama, there’s no way to tell you any of this without cussin’.’ I shake my head, and she reaches out for my hand. I give it to her, letting her hold it and soaking in the comfort it brings. How do I even start? ‘I accused Cara of blackmailing Roberta to get the house.’ She gasps, and I turn to look at her. ‘It gets worse. I did that because Jessie gave me some letters, supposedly from Cara to Roberta, and instead of questioning it, I stormed in there and called her a lying bitch.’ She drops my hand like it’s on fire, and it sucks.
‘Douglas Campell!’ She stands and paces away. ‘I did not raise you to talk to a woman that way, especially not a woman you care about.’
‘I know, Mama. I know. I was just so mad, so fuckin’ hurt.’
‘You’re telling me that Jessie told you about these letters, Jessie gave them to you, and you believed her—after everything?’
‘Yeah, I know. I messed up.’
‘You sure did, son.’ She sits again and reaches for my hand once more. ‘Jessie wasn’t raised right. We all know that. She didn’t have parents that guided her the right way. She was taught to look out for number one, always, and it hurts me to say that about my grandbaby’s mother, but it’s true. How could you believe that of Cara?’
‘It was in black and white. I had the letters in my hand.’
‘And now?’
‘Cara kicked me out. I went to see Jessie, and she told me she had written the letters. I’m an idiot.’ I hang my head, not sure whether to even tell her the next level of crazy. ‘She said Cara is her sister.’
I feel the light squeeze of my hand as she tenses, and I turn my attention to her.
‘Mama?’
I notice the tight line of her mouth and the way her breathing has picked up in pace.
‘ Mama .’
‘Oh my—’ She releases my hand and brings hers to her chest.
‘You have got to be fucking kidding me.’
‘Nobody was supposed to know,’ she whispers, and I jump up to stand.
‘Are you telling me this is true? How?’
‘Please, Doug. Just give me a minute, okay?’
She gets up and heads inside the house, leaving me reeling. Is she confirming what Jessie said—that Cara is her sister? That, my probably now ex- girlfriend, is my baby’s aunt?
Harley watches me intently as I pace on the patio, waiting for my mom.
‘I’m sorry, sweetheart. I needed to get this.’ She hands me an envelope and written on the front are three words: To my baby. ‘ You need to take this to Cara, Doug.’
‘She won’t see me, Ma.’
‘Then make her. She’s going to need you there when she reads this.’
‘Are you going to tell me what it says?’
‘If she doesn’t, yes, I will. But she needs to read it first.’
I inhale deeply—so many questions in my mind, but the main one is whether she’ll even allow me close enough to give her this.
‘Fuck,’ I mutter under my breath as I walk up toward the porch. I don’t see this going well.
The door opens, and I see Missy standing there. Shit.
‘Uh uh, I don’t think so. You can turn around and walk your ass back to that pretty bike of yours.’
I keep walking, stepping up onto the porch as she glares up at me.
‘I’m not leaving, Missy. I need to talk to her.’
‘She doesn’t want to talk to you.’
‘I know that, but it’s important. I just need five minutes, please.’
‘No, you need to leave. You can’t come up here upsetti…’
‘It’s okay.’ My breath rushes out of me as she walks up behind her friend. She looks exhausted. ‘Missy, it’s okay, really.’
Cara smiles at Missy, who glares at me before walking into the house. Cara steps into the doorway, making it clear she’s not letting me inside the house.
‘What do you want?’
‘I need to talk to you.’
‘So talk.’
‘Cara, I know you don’t want to talk to me, but this is important, and it’s not a standing-on-your-doorstep kind of conversation.’ I pull out the letter from my back pocket. ‘I need to give you this.’
She huffs out a laugh. ‘Another letter? Haven’t they caused enough trouble?’
‘It’s from Charlotte.’
At those words, she freezes, her eyes locked on mine, and I nod, hoping she sees that she can still trust me, trust this, despite everything.
I step back, hopeful the distance from the letter will draw her out of the house, and it works, so I retreat further and sit on the bench seat she bought for the porch. She sits next to me, and I hand her the letter.
‘I know you hate me right now,’ I say softly, but she doesn’t raise her attention from the words on the envelope. ‘But my mom asked me to stay with you until you read this, so I’m asking you to let me do that.’
Without a word, Cara opens the envelope and starts to read, and I can do nothing but watch her as her whole world falls apart.