Chapter 3 #2
I sighed and lowered the coffee.
Yeah, I didn’t want to disappoint Garrak, and what the shit was that?
With a grunt, or possibly a hum of understanding, Garrak slid the bacon onto a napkin-lined plate, then reached for the egg carton. As he began to crack them into the same pan—four, six, eight eggs?—he jerked his chin toward the fridge.
“If you want orange juice instead, it’s in there. Can you take the bacon to the table?”
I guess the fact I hadn’t answered his question about lying was answer enough, huh? With a stifled sigh, I did as he asked, telling myself I should be ridiculously grateful he’d given me a place to stay and was feeding me without expecting anything in return.
Look, when you come from the kind of world I do, trading a blowjob for a warm place to stay isn’t that weird, okay? Don’t get me wrong: I wasn’t exactly proud of some of the shit I’d done in my past. And having my goddamn father volunteer me for such a thing was a first, yeah.
It meant that I was definitely a jumble of emotions yet again as I sat down to breakfast. For what Garrak had done for me, another guy would have expected way more than a blowjob. And I’d shown up on his doorstep for the express purpose of…you know.
But he’d turned me down. He’d kissed me, he’d pressed a huge erection against me, and then he’d pushed me away. What the hell was I supposed to think? To feel?
I clicked my tongue stud against my teeth and hunched my shoulders when I bent over my plate, trying to act blasé. “These eggs are good, thanks.”
Garrak hummed, like he didn’t believe me. “You want a donut?”
“Nah.” This time my shy smile didn’t feel forced as I flicked a glance his way. “I’ll save ‘em for you.”
“Meli’s Bake Shop in town makes them on Sundays, and I have a sweet tooth.”
Good to know.
“Maybe I’ll go check them out.” I shrugged as I scooped up some of the fluffy eggs. “During your meeting today.” Surely he wouldn’t leave me alone here, would he? “When is it?”
He glanced at his watch. “Ninety minutes, other side of town. I’ll drive you over there if you want to see Eastshore.”
I blinked. “That’s…thank you.” What was up with this guy? Why would he turn down what I was offering and then be so…nice? “I looked up some stuff about the island before catching the bus down here from the airport. It looks…cute.”
“It is.” Garrak’s focus was on the food as he ate. “I’ve only been here about six months—I moved out here with some of my guys when we closed the mine in Colorado—but I like it. We like it.” He slowly lowered his fork, although he didn’t look up. “Feels like it could be a home.”
Was it my imagination, or was there a hint of wistfulness there? Huh.
“Can I ask you a personal question?”
The words slipped out before I could really think them through, and the wariness in his gaze when he finally looked at me told me that they’d sounded as awkward as I’d thought. I winced and clarified: “It’s about your leg.”
Understanding dawned across his face, then his expression turned neutral once more, like he was trying to hide his thoughts.
So, arranging my fork beside my plate, I pressed ahead.
“You have to know I noticed. It’s logical that I’m going to wonder what happened, right?
So I want to ask what happened, how you lost it, but I also don’t want you to feel obligated to answer my question.
” I sighed and ran a hand through my hair, hoping I was making sense.
“By asking if I can ask about it, I’m trying to make it okay for you to say no, that you don’t want to talk about it, without it being awkward.
But now I’ve made it even more awkward, and I’m sorry. ”
I finished with a wince, but I’d been watching him, and somewhere around the midpoint of that convoluted explanation, his expression had cleared.
Now he was watching me, his head cocked to one side.
There was a hint of curiosity in his dark eyes, and the lack of tightness around his lips told me that maybe he wasn’t pissed I asked.
“Most of that made sense,” he finally said.
I shrugged and reached for my fork again. “Sorry.”
“No, I don’t mind answering. The fact that you knew to ask before you asked…
well, no, that didn’t make any more sense than when you said it.
” There was a hint of teasing there, and I saw his lips twitch.
“It was a mining accident almost eight years ago now. Sabotage caused a collapse, and a bunch of us were trapped.”
I’d paused, my eggs halfway to my mouth, as my eyes widened. “What happened?” I breathed.
“I’d been near enough to the door of the building that I could get out the first batch of guys, but the rest took some more effort. I found everyone eventually.” His gaze dropped to his plate, and I watched him scowl. “Even the guys who…”
I think I’d stopped breathing, listening to his explanation, and now a sick feeling of dread settled in my stomach.
But he took a deep breath and reached for his favorite coffee. “Anyhow. On my last trip in, a beam fell on my leg, shattering a bunch of bones. Amputation was easier. At least I was lucky enough to walk away from—” He snorted. “Well, not walk, but I survived. Three of my guys didn’t.”
Oh yeah, I was definitely staring, open-mouthed, at Garrak by now.
That was… “Wow,” I breathed.
He shrugged and took a sip of coffee. “The hardest part was learning to walk—”
“You went back in how many times?”
He hadn’t expected the question, judging from the way he’d reared back slightly, a dip between his fierce brows. “What?”
“You got the first group of guys out, yeah?” My food was forgotten now. “And you went back in? How many times?”
Garrak stared at me, the mug cupped between his two gigantic hands. I couldn’t read his thoughts, but he didn’t move for the longest time. Finally, he inhaled. “Four. It took four trips to get them all out.”
“You went back into a collapsed mine four times—”
“It was one of those pre-fab buildings, sitting at the base of a pit mine. The asshole set dynamite charges that set off an avalanche during one of our celebrations.”
“Yes, fine.” I waved away the distinction as I sat forward, my elbows on the table.
“You went back into an avalanche-squashed building four times to pull out your friends and co-workers? You know, in psychology, we call that kind of thing compulsive caretaking. Or maybe a hero complex.” I grinned.
“Except I don’t think you were thinking about that. ”
His lips were tugging downward again. “Thinking about what?”
“Being a hero.” Did he really not see it?
“You were just doing it because they were your guys, right?” Suddenly, I thought I had a bit more of an understanding of Garrak’s character.
“And you take care of your guys.” Just like you took care of me.
“You were looking out for them then, and…” I cocked my head.
“And you came here to Eastshore, looking out for them now.”
I wondered if he allowed any of them to look out for him.
Slowly, Garrak put down his mug without looking away from me. He was watching me as if he couldn’t make sense of me. As if I were one of those subjects from clinical trials in school.
When he finally spoke, he sounded hesitant. “The first five guys who followed me out here were all down there that day.”
“And you saved them.” I sat back with a grin, proud I’d figured out a bit about my strange host. “You protected them, and they trust you, Garrak. No wonder they followed you.”
“Do you want to come with me to my meeting today?”
He didn’t exactly blurt the words, but they were enough of a non sequitur that I blinked in surprise. “To…your meeting?” He said it was across town, right?
“Yeah. I think…” He shook his head and reached for his fork again. “You might appreciate what I’m trying to do.”
Well, that was mysterious as hell, wasn’t it?
But I didn’t know anyone in Eastshore, and had nothing to do today except maybe stand outside that bakery he’d mentioned and admire the delicious treats for sale…
so I might as well go to his mysterious meeting, yeah?
Maybe it’d give me some more insight into my mysterious host.
Which would help me figure out how to crack him.
I had to get him to erase Dad’s debt if I didn’t want to spend the rest of my life looking over my shoulder, and if I only had until Sunday, then I needed to squeeze in as many hours with Garrak as possible.
Right. That was the only reason I was smiling shyly when I nodded. “That would be nice. Thanks for inviting me.”