11. Ellie
Ellie
W e dropped our coats in the hallway. My sweater flew somewhere to vanish in the dark. Grey unzipped his jeans and pushed them down to his thighs, forcing him to duck walk into my bedroom while still licking my tonsils. I fell backward onto my bed, losing his luscious tongue, and tried to wiggle out of my jeans, panting with lust.
After losing contact, Grey quickly stripped. He tumbled to the bed beside me, discovered my struggles to get as naked as him. Laughing under his breath, he rose to his knees, lifted my jeans at my ankles, and yanked. I yelped as I went with my pants, my hips rising.
Free of my jeans, I fell back onto the bed. My pussy throbbed as Grey knelt over me, lifting my knees, and spreading them.
“What―” I began as he settled my legs over his shoulders.
“Hush.”
I cried out as his tongue lapped at my rapidly swelling and highly sensitive clit. He sucked at my arousal, drinking it, teasing me, driving me insane with lust. Unable to writhe, to buck my hips with his strong hands holding them down, he forced me to endure the exquisite and torturous pleasure his mouth offered while unable to move.
“Oh, God,” I groaned, my fingers tangled in his hair. “I’m gonna come!”
My orgasm built and climbed, growing, towering, before finally spilling over. Awash in sweet sensations, I cried out, moaning, my pussy quaking, on fire, burning, burning…I was helpless under its force, so I rolled along with it, tumbling out of control, its sweeping pleasure knocking me for a loop.
Grey lifted his face from my sopping pussy but didn’t take my legs from his shoulders. Inching forward, he pushed his iron hard cock against my entrance and thrust in. Massive, like a hot steel rod, his shaft invaded, spreading me wide, splitting me open. In the weeks since our last love session, my pussy must have shrunk. A tingling pain accompanied his initial thrusting and almost had me yelling for him to stop.
Then the pleasure his cock offered sent the pain swirling away. My legs wide open, Grey driving forward at a sharp angle. He had little trouble reaching my G-spot. He struck it again and again, a fresh climax spiraling rapidly out of control. I bit my wrist to halt the wild scream that might alarm the neighbors, my head spinning under the sweeping and intense sensation.
Throbbing, my pussy undulated as my second orgasm clamped down on Grey’s plunging shaft. Above me, he moaned through his clenched teeth, his cock swelling, slamming into me, his sweat dripping onto my bed, my breasts.
“I can’t hold it,” he gritted, burying himself into me so hard and so fast that my orgasm rolled on without stopping. Two climaxes combined into one it seemed. Seeing stars behind my closed eyes, I writhed under him, locking my cries in my throat.
Grey uttered a long, slow groan, his muscles granite hard, his entire body stiff as his cock spurted deep into me. His powerful thrusts slowed, gradually coming to a stop. Releasing my legs, panting, Grey laid atop me, his cock still deep inside.
In languid satisfaction, I slid my arms around his neck, holding his damp cheek against mine. I don’t know how long we laid there, locked together in a tangle of arms, legs and cock, nor did I care. I could easily have gone to sleep with his heavy weight pinning me down, a man-sized blanket to keep me warm.
When he rolled off me, his dick slid from me in a wet plop, I nearly demanded he come back. Grey stood up from the bed and tugged the covers out from under me. I half sat up, wildly thinking he planned to cover me up, get dressed and leave.
“You’re not going?” I asked.
Grey did cover me up, but then crawled under the blankets with me. “I should.”
“I don’t want you to.”
Snuggling against his shoulder, throwing my leg over his, I idly played with his chest hair. Breathing in the scents of sweat and sex, I considered the consequences of us sleeping together yet again. We both agreed we asked for trouble by doing so. Not to mention that we have been less than careful and not given any thought to protection.
I could ruin everything for him. Screw up my own life more than it already is. Where’s my good sense? My so-called intelligence?
“We can’t do this again,” Grey murmured.
“I know.” I breathed in deeply. “I can’t be responsible for ruining your life.”
“I’m getting older. There are only a few years left where I can compete with the younger guys. After that, no one will care what I do or who I do it with.”
“Are you suggesting we wait? Not see each other until after you retire?”
“I’m not suggesting anything,” he replied. “I’ve grown too fond of you to not see you…but I’m still far too old for a young, virile girl who can take her pick of men.”
I stroked his chest. “You make it sound easy. Pick a guy and live happily ever after. I wasn’t born yesterday.”
Grey chuckled. “Take my advice. Dump both me and Colton. Stay single for a few years, see the kind of dudes you’ll attract. Go on normal dates. Live a good, decent life.”
“And marry and have ankle biters.” I sighed. “Become a suburban housewife, join the PTA, bake cakes for fundraisers. Is that the kind of woman I should be? Because that’s not what I want.”
His arms tightened around me as he kissed my brow. “Just promise me you’ll find a guy closer to your age. That’s all I want. For you to be happy.”
I said nothing.
I laid awake for a long time, listening to his deep, steady breathing as Grey slept. What will make me happy? Grey would make me happy. The one man who I want to spend my life with, raise kids with, join a PTA for, was Grey.
The only man I can’t have.
***
He woke before I did, and the sound of him in the shower forced me into stirring. I glanced at the clock―6:00 a.m. Groaning, I tried to shut my ears and go back to sleep. I never liked waking up before seven. A morning person I was not.
With the troubling conversation the previous night haunting me, returning to sleep became impossible. I knew what he’d suggested I do was not just the smartest idea, and the overall wisest move, I didn’t want to take that route. Was I falling in love with Grey?
Maybe I was.
Maybe I was just infatuated, as his presence in my life, along with the great sex, had soothed me when I hurt the most. Grey offered a stabilizing influence just when I needed it. So, does that equate to love? If this was true, then would I cease to need Grey once my heart healed?
Tossing in my bed, my crazy thoughts whirling in my mind, I listened to the shower shut off, heard Grey first drying himself then dressing. I didn’t fake sleep when he walked quietly back into my bedroom.
“Did I wake you up? I’m sorry,” he said.
“No, it’s okay.”
He sat beside me and stroked my hair, his expression sorrowful. “I screwed up your life, didn’t I?”
“No. I did it. I jumped from Colton to you without looking first. That’s a burden you shouldn’t have to carry.”
“I’m strong.” Grey smiled, his green eyes glinting with humor. “You’re a special kind of someone, Ellie. I have to fight to not fall in love with you.”
“Don’t,” I said. “That’ll screw both of us up. It’s best if we just both walk away. Right?”
He looked away from me, his smile gone. “Yeah. It’ll hurt like hell, but you’re right. If I were ten years younger.”
“Or me ten years older. I’m not. Nor are you.”
Bending, Grey kissed me tenderly, with love, with a promise he cannot keep. “I’m still here for you. Keep my number. You call, I’ll answer.”
“Thanks.”
Grey stood, looking down at me without talking for a long time. I didn’t know what his thoughts were, but I felt my insides ripping apart at the seams. I had to let him go.
For both of our sakes and sanities.
“I’ve got to go,” he murmured. “Stay safe.”
“You, too.”
I knew I’d cry the moment he shut the door behind him. I tried not to, but the tears came anyway, hot and burning on my cheeks. Holding the pillow he used against my chest, I wept into it, needing him to come back, needing him to stay.
Forever.
***
Once burned, twice shy.
Is that how the saying went?
I worked with suspicion uppermost in my mind. Would other clients cheat me? Accept the work I performed and created for them, then refuse to pay me on the grounds there wasn’t anything I could do about it?
Upon receiving an invitation to send samples of my work to a potential client, I looked the company up on the internet. In searching through reviews from past employees and vendors, I decided to take the risk.
I’m doing thorough research on everyone from now on.
With a grim glee, I posted my experience with the company who refused to pay me in as many places as I could think of. YELP, and Glassdoor, Facebook, Instagram as well as tweeted it. With hashtags galore.
“Payback’s a bitch,” I muttered.
My cell buzzed, making me jump. As though the company I’d just slammed found out and now called to say they planned to take me to court for slander. My hand trembled as I picked it up to look at the caller.
Not some unknown number who may or may not be a corporate lawyer.
Lindy.
Making my voice high pitched with a Southern drawl, I answered with a, “Oh, my heavens! Is this the slut who stole my boyfriend? Why, I’m so pleased you called, dearie.”
Lindy said nothing for a few long seconds. “I guess I deserved that.”
“Indeed, you did.” I returned to my normal voice. “What do you want?”
“I wanted to talk to you, Ellie,” she replied, her voice subdued. “I need to apologize.”
“What for? You fucked Colton, fucked me over. I’m sure you thought you were doing right.”
“At first, I didn’t care if it was right or wrong,” she said, her tone low. “I wanted Colton. You had him, I didn’t. I got jealous, made him look at me. Well, he did. Then what he did to you, and…it hit me he’d do the same to me. One day.”
“He would, sister. Did you know he’s begging me to come back?”
“No. I didn’t.” She paused. “Will you take him back?”
“When hell freezes over, I might consider it.”
“I wanted to go after you that night, before the snowstorm,” Lindy said. “I told Colton we should, you could die in that cold. He didn’t care. He said you’d be fine and realize it was stupid and come crawling back. You didn’t though.”
“I was willing to die before I’d crawl back to fake friends and a betraying boyfriend.”
Shocked, Lindy gasped, “You can’t mean that.”
“I did, and I do. And if you think I’ll forgive what you did, you can forget it. I was owed an apology; I’ll accept. But no way in Hell will I trust you again. None of you. Not Colton, not Jen, not you. Especially you, dearie. Burned bridges, and all that.”
“Just know I’m sorry,” Lindy said stiffly. “I was wrong, and I know it now. I’ll make it up to you by bettering myself in the future.”
“Yeah, yeah. Lindy, you’re so full of shit you squeak. Don’t call me again.”
I clicked to end the call and tossed my phone on my desk. I stared at my computer and thought about nothing except burned bridges.